"If you want to understand today, you have to search yesterday."
Pearl Buck
The Great Event
"Talking"
'Thinking'
StressedDib's bag of popcorn lay on the floor spilled. It pattern left a very interesting, but unimportant design. He covered his eyes and sighed. Never in his short life did he think he would end up watching an alien health video. He shook his head and dryly laughed at the situation. Dib went back to the beginning of the video and decided he needed to check his notes. He couldn't believe that he was going to watch again. Dib checked his door and made sure it was locked. He didn't want his dad to think he watching some type of psycho porn.
"Hello there…whoever's watching!" A tall Irken shouted out as he waved his hand enthusiastically.
Dib locked over the Irken and guessed he stood about five foot eight. He wore a green suit similar to the leaders of Irk today. Dib remembered the aliens from when Gir had called them. He noticed that this Irken had no Pak on his back. His eyes were a dark forest green.
"Hello?" Dib responded under his breath. He knew that this recording wouldn't respond to him like the last.
"Whoever's watching this must be watching this because my race has obliviously done something wrong. I'm guessing we've either gone extinct, killed ourselves off, or got conquered."
The Irken sighed and waved his hand. An imaged of a beautiful plant appeared on the screen. Dib couldn't believe the color of the planet. The image quickly faded and the Irken appeared on the screen.
"I am Leader Rig," the Irken proudly introduced. "I have been the elected official on Irk for over two hundred years."
"Elected," Dib noted.
"I am recording this for reference to the past, history is important because I'm sure the future smeets will never know what happened."
Leader Rig waved his hand and a giant misshaped sphere with nine green orbs embedded appeared. A small blue screen was in the middle of the green orbs. Dib sketched the picture down; it was done crudely.
"The Irkens were a race of peace. We lived in a society that held basic elections based on qualifications. It wasn't perfect, but it worked. Our environment was free of technology, free of war, and hate. Our death rate was very high though."
A picture of a male and female Irken appeared on the screen.
"The reason our death rate affects us so badly is because not many smeets are born. The process of making a smeet is very dangerous and rarely initiated."
"I can't believe I'm watching this," Dib mumbled as his cheeks burned.
"A smeet can only be created two times out of the year. The male enters a cycle at a certain time in the year once they reach fifty. Our antennae hold a pheromone that gathers throughout the years and is released when overfilled. The pheromone only affects those who are already attracted to each other, or it affects those who would produce the strongest offspring. The pheromone to any male Irken smells like something flowery. The female's antennae pick up this scent and trigger the female's reproductive system. The Irken female begins to produce eggs."
Dib copied the information done and sighed. His head felt like it was going to explode from embarrassment.
"The male Irken enters a phase in which all else void. He seeks the female out on the planet. These pheromones travel across the entire planet seeking the right female Irken. The male will travel till he finds the female. When they meet, they enter another phase. The male at first will court the female in his own way and seek to gain her approval. She will then release a scent that will accept his proposal or deny him. If the female accepts the male, he will not leave the female for any reason while she is producing eggs. When this cycle is complete, they enter a violent stage. They will both challenge each other. It is a violent process that usually ends up in one or both Irkens dead. The male seeks to find out if the female is strong enough to bear his young, and he wants a female that is not weak. The female wishes to find out if the male is strong enough to protect her and she doesn't want to bear weak offspring."
Dib continued to write as he felt his left eye twitch.
"If all challenges are completed, then comes the fun part!" Leader Rig cheered as he 'wooted'.
"The male simply marks the female with his pheromone and simply releases cells into her body. A female can bear up to about twelve smeets, the most common number is four."
"That's way too many kids," Dib mumbled as he picked up a piece of popcorn and popped it into his mouth.
"Our death rate is also high because the females are at a high risk rate for death. The smeets within her body usually drain her of all life."
"That sucks."
"Are people are constantly looking for a way to immortalize ourselves. I mean we do live fore many years if don't mate, but we are close to extinction because of lack of smeets. Our elders have gone sterile because of age, and we have no way to continue."
The picture of the misshaped sphere appeared on screen again.
"I thought about this situation and created something that would make reproducing easier. I have created an Irken control brain that designates certain pairs to reproduce. We were able to download our memories into this brain to add further information."
A Pak appeared on the screen next.
"The brain has created a way for us to stop mating. The brain has collected all of available Irken DNA. It blends the sequences together and creates smeets. This had been going on for three hundred years. I was a scientist before I became a leader. The blending has increased our population, but there is a major side effect. Our height has been affected to the point of where the new smeets only reach four feet."
A chart of the Irkens throughout the years was shown. It showed the steady decreased in height.
"I believe that our height has been affected because the same DNA is constantly being duplicated and put to use. The constant cloning has slowly degraded our DNA. The Irkens have decided to once again begin the ancient ways ofreproducing in order to add new DNA to our bloodline."
An Irken with a Pak was now shown on the screen.
"The control brain has issued a standardized Pak to the newborn smeets. All smeets have had a Pak attached to their spine. The control brain releases the smeets only if they are born blank. Many Irkens have rebelled against this new method, a Pak was forced upon them, and they have all been reprogrammed."
Leader Rig appeared with a wryly grin on his face. He scratched his head and sighed.
"I tried to remove a Pak and found that it kills the Irken within ten minutes. The Pak is also designed to attach itself to another host if removed. It is programmed with a personality, information, and assigned rank that the control brain sees fit. Most of the Irkens have either been killed off by the newer generation, or they have been assigned a Pak. I, myself, have removed the Pak that was assigned to me. There was a defect in the data stream allowing me a certain amount of free will."
Leader Rig sighed and Dib finally noticed how dull his eyes looked.
"Each Pak is controlled by the brain. A defective Pak is the only thing that a control brain has no power over. Once the Pak is defective, the Irken will once again begin to revert to the ways of its ancestors. I haven't had much time to research a defective, but I find the possibilities infinite. The control brain is the thing that runs the entire empire. It seeks to destroy everything because it has no emotions…it has no heart. The control brain is cold logic."
Leader Rig took a deep breath.
"I wish any species luck if they found this recording…the control brain took everything and it's probably coming for your species next. Leader Rig signing off."
Dib tapped his pen against the paper the he took notes on. The Irken acted like any normal human would. He showed regret, compassion, and a sense of guilt. Dib didn't blame him for feeling guilty. In sense, the Leader Rig had doomed his own race. Dib shook his head and stretched. Their own machinery had taken over them.
'Defective Pak,' Dib mused as he circled the words on the paper.
His eyes widened in realization.
"Zim's defective," Dib suddenly whispered.
"…I find the possibilities infinite."
"GAZ!" Dib shouted.
He threw open his door and ran to his sister's room. He banged on her door and growled when no one answered. Dib quickly ran down the stairs and found that her shoes were gone. He smacked himself in the face.
"She wears her boots anyways," Dib growled as he ran outside.
"Hey!" The ship shouted at him.
"Got to go!" Dib shouted back.
"I want my parts back!" The ship growled as it stretched out a wire and grabbed the boy.
"I have to go…it's an emergency!" Dib yelled as he struggled in the grip.
"I'm not letting you go till you give back my parts," the ship smugly said.
"Hey ship," Dib calmly said.
"Yeah?"
"Why did you have those disks?" Dib questioned.
"Tak was doing research on her race and gathered the disks from Zeta Reticulan. I think it's close to the Orion system," the ship answered.
Purple crossed his arms and glared at the Irken before him. He shook his head and Red rolled his eyes. The Irken raised his eyes and Purple frowned. He didn't like her curled antennae or the way she smugly stared at him. Purple could see a hidden malice within her green eyes. He sneered at her and she smugly smiled. He hated all four feet of her.
"I don't like her," Purple declared.
"You aren't supposed to like her," Red pointed out.
"I still don't like her," Purple stated as he closed his yes and looked away.
"Invader Kook," Red firmly said.
"Yes my Tallest," Invader Kook spoke as she wiggled her antennae.
"Hey! It's Tallests! I'm floating here too!" Purple snapped as he had trouble trying to pluralize tallest.
"Invader Kook…your mission is to travel to Earth and destroy Zim," Red ordered.
"Why can't I give orders?" Purple questioned.
"Because you would send her to go get chips!" Red mumbled.
"Would not! I'd have her get curly fires!" Purple smugly said as Red smacked himself in the face.
"My mission is to destroy Zim, correct?" Invader Kook questioned.
"This is your chance for you to earn your Invader status," Red informed.
"Permission to ask a question?" Invader Kook asked.
"Okay," Red drawled.
"Which way do you want Zim destroyed?" Kook questioned with a grin.
"Do what you deem best," Red waved off with a smirk.
Purple opened one eye in confusion. Red rarely gave free reign in anything. The Irken saluted and walked off to prepared for her mission to earth. Once she was out of hearing ranged Purple glared at Red.
"Why did you give her free reign?" Purple questioned with mild anger.
"Kook is insane, so she'll definitely kill Zim," Red answered.
"I still don't like her," Purple seriously said.
"Let's go get some nachos," Red sighed.
"I think she'll screw up," Purple admitted.
Red froze. Purple rarely gave his opinion on things like this. He simply stated whether he liked or disliked the thing. Red looked over his shoulder and saw Purple staring out into space.
"What do you mean?" Red carefully questioned.
"I'm not sure," Purple mumbled.
"Then let's get nachos!"
"I'm not hungry," Purple grumbled as he floated off.
Red watched as hiscompanion exited the room. He dropped his arms and scowled. Red turned to gaze out at the universe and wondered what was wrong. He crossed his arms and figured it was one of those moods. Purple had weird mood swings at times, but mostly they rarely came. Red wondered what was bothering his co-leader.
Author's Notes:
Some people had some questions and Invader Stunk and Leader Rig will answer...
Invader Stunk: Dear Invader Johnny, Invader Skoodge is being held hostage with the rest of us and will make an appearance(runs from meat) Mini Moose had only to say squeak No one knows if he will show up
Leader Rig: Invader Maz, the forum is where you might find an idea to write about or post an idea that you would like to see written
Invader Stunk: Is Gir a girl or a boy...mentally that is?(Dodges more meat)
Leader Rig: Please leave a review else we won't get paid(puppy eyes)
Invader Stunk: We're getting paid?
Leader Rig: No...sadly we're not...
I'll update soon!