1Reflections about the day and the question that would go unanswered..
I don't really remember my walk back from April's apartment to the hotel. My mind was in a complete daze. It was swirling with mixed emotions and the busy sounds of the city were calming me but I seemed to walk in a trance. I felt like I was alone as I was walking even though Lea was right beside me. I never once looked at her, but I knew she was probably looking at me in confusion. I mean I had a very bizarre and traumatizing life with my accident in 1999 and the incident that occurred in 2001, but this was really beyond anything that I would ever expect in my life.
When I went to April's apartment to first meet my so called, "guardian angel," I was worried that it would be someone I totally would not like even though for awhile I thought myself to be silly to have a slight crush on a stranger that I had no clue what he looked like! Well this was something I definitely did not expect at all! When I first saw them, I felt scared. I had no clue what they were and I felt really embarrassed more than anything. I wanted to get up and run from the room that very moment or just shout out in anger. I would have defended myself more, but I felt so embarrassed that I just kind of wanted to curl up. But immediately when I met Don's gaze as April was calling out their names, I felt kind of bad for acting the way that I did, that I just grew quiet and my tension died down.
I mean all of my life, people have made fun of me for being "different" than them by the way I acted, the way I dressed, or the way I talked. I knew what it was like to be turned down. I remember I often got mad at others when they made fun of someone who was different from them and I would curse at them for being so closed-minded. But here I was, going against everything I stood for. Donatello's face looked so pained that it made me want to cry. I knew that I was the one who made him feel this way. I felt so angry against myself that I couldn't hold his gaze any longer and I had let my eyes stare at the ground. After all, Donatello was the one who saved my life in the Bronx that one night. He didn't have to do what he did but he did and what gratitude was I giving him? None! I had rejected him by his looks even though he did his best to take care of me.
To make things worse I think the way I first responded kind of set off Lea. I knew how I reacted caused anger in Donatello's brothers. I heard Raph's insults towards me and I knew he was right and it made me feel even worse that I just grew quieter because I had no clue on how to say that I was sorry. But Lea defended me and yelled back at Raphael. I knew she was only being my friend and I felt somewhat happy that she took up for me but I also knew that this was only making things worse. All I could do was just stand there trying to hide my shameful expression behind Lea's back as I heard her start to have a few choice words with the turtle in the blue mask, Leonardo. Clearly they did not like one another for it seemed like every word was an insult to one another. But no matter how much Lea tried to defend her and I, Leonardo was in fact right. We were the ones to contact them, I made the choice, they didn't have to come and see us.
Judging by their appearance you would think they would be use to the reaction of being seen by humans but why what I did trouble them so much, especially Donatello? This made me even sadder. I just wanted to get out of there so I decided that I would take the day to think things over to recompose myself and talk to Lea. But I wanted to see them again, especially Donatello. I felt so sorry for him for making him hurt the way I did. I mean he was smiling at me some shyly when I told them that I would come back tomorrow to see them. This made me shy too because the way he smiled at me was kind of cute. But what I am I saying? No way in heck could anything more than friendship develop between us. He's a turtle! Another species! But I did feel kind of sorry for him. This whole situation troubled me more as I kept thinking about what his brothers were saying back and forth, especially what Michelangelo kept saying. Michelangelo did bring up the fact that Don was alone and the tone of his voice, even Mike was pained to say it. Now I began to feel bad for Donatello even more. I knew I had to thank him for saving my life and that I would love to be his friend for what he has done for me, but I couldn't say that to him at that very moment. It didn't seem like a great time to say it and my mind was still so confused that I would have trouble saying the right things.
Lea and I stopped at Sbarro's pizza parlor across from our hotel on 43rd street. We didn't have much to say to each other that day while we ate our early supper. I think our eye contacts spoke for themselves. We were both troubled by what we had just experienced. I think Lea was not too thrilled about going back the next day to see them for a lot of reasons. First of all was the fact that Leonardo was coming along with Don and Mike to see me again. I could tell that Lea could not stand him, but at least the other turtle; Raphael wouldn't be there so she would only have to deal with Leonardo. Second of all, she also knew that Donatello must have a crush on me and she wasn't too happy with that. But she knew that I was thinking the same thing as her, "it can never happen because he's a different species," so it didn't bother her that much at all. I mean me in love with a mutant turtle? Now that DID sound strange! That could never happen! Thirdly of all, I think she wanted to go out and do some things on our own on our trip while we still had the time to do it in.
Finally I broke the silence between us, "Listen, Lea. I promise we'll meet them tomorrow night at April's and that's it. The rest of our trip is ours." I was going to tell her that I wouldn't mind going by myself back to April's because I felt bad dragging her around, but I knew what her answer would be before I even asked it. She would not allow me to go by myself even if that I meant for her to get into more arguments with Leonardo. That was the only thing that was said between us at the pizza parlor till we reached our hotel room. Both of us were kind of exhausted from our day trip so we decided to relax and watch the movie that we had ordered from the hotel that evening: Last Samurai. So for the rest of the evening till about 8pm, we watched the movie and giggled about how hot the Asian men were who starred in the movie. I was really happy that we decided to watch that movie because it kind of eased our troubled minds and by this, the barrier between us diminished and we were able to talk within one another as our normal selves.
Course after the movie, I gave her my huge lecture on how wrong I thought the Americans were for trying to change Japan into something that they did not want to be for the longest time. We both giggled and then we continued our thoughts on the movie, and debated if we should watch the movie again or not since we had it for the entire night. I felt myself open up more as we talked, what happened earlier that day seemed like it never existed for that brief time that Lea and I had. Course I had to open my big mouth with the remark, "You know, Lea. I noticed that the turtles that we met earlier carried weapons like they used in Japan. The blue one had swords. Do you think they follow that entire mess with honor?"
Lea rolled her eyes, I could tell that my question made her feel kind of annoyed by the remembrance of the humanoid turtles. She sat up on the bed straighter, and tossed her hair back. Her smile had disappeared, and seeing this made me want to smack myself for bringing up the issue once more. "Leonardo wouldn't know honor if it came up and smacked him across the head." Her tone was very angry and it kind of scared me for an instant because I never knew what hostility she had towards him. This confused me because I didn't understand how she could hate him so much? Well maybe hate is a strong word, more like dislike to a very extreme point. I stared at her for a moment while she used the remote to restart the movie once again in the DVD player, I wanted to read her thoughts and figure out why the heck she was so angry. I mean I didn't want to ask her because I knew when to stay out of emotions, but I had no luck trying to figure out what troubled her, her mind was a closed book. I mean normally I can tell what bothers her, but this time it was different, very different! Lea let out a giggle as the movie started up again, but I could tell it was a fake one. "The movie's starting again!"
I smiled at her some weakly, the barrier was back up between us, however I decided to just let things go for the moment. I watched the opening clip of the movie as the guy was talking about how Japan was created, but I couldn't get my mind to focus. I was going over reasons in my head to figure out what the heck was troubling Lea. Was she mad at me for wanting to go back to April's tomorrow? Was she mad because I kept silent earlier yesterday during the heated verbal battle she and Leonardo had? What exactly about Leonardo was troubling her so much? The only logical explanation that I could come up with for the moment was that since he appeared to be the leader of the group and probably the oldest, he was trying to protect his family's well being. Lea was the same way. She was 2 years older than me and even though we weren't really sisters by blood, we were by heart and she took care of me, just like Leonardo took care of his brothers. Since I was scared and kind of heart broken at the moment, Lea was angry by this and since Don was pained by my reaction, Leonardo was angry. That had to be why both of them fought. I just hoped that perhaps they could talk to each other and realize that they are so much alike that they should get along.
I decided to maybe get Lea to cheer up again since I think my question brought her down. "So any plans for tomorrow, sis?" I asked hopefully as I smiled some, my eyes going from the TV back to my friend.
"Not sure, anything you want to do?" She said, her voice still seemed a bit sad and she kept her gaze on the movie.
I frowned for a moment and paused. I hated to see her sad, I was beginning to feel bad for even going to the Bronx. If I didn't go then none of this mess would have happened and right now we would be all happy and probably running around the streets of Times Square. "Well did you want to go to China Town tomorrow and look for some anime?" I smirked big, knowing that she always talked a lot about looking for anime.
I saw Lea's eyes light up by the question, but then she looked troubled again. Her tone didn't change at all. "What about April's? I thought you wanted to go there."
"That's not till tomorrow night, sis." I smiled trying to keep the mood cheery. "We can get up in the morning and take the subway to Canal Street. If we get there by 11am, we will have practically the entire day!" I smiled as I reached over from my bed and pushed her some slightly. "Come on, I know you want to. You can't resist anime men." I snickered.
This made Lea bust out laughing and she lightly pushed me back. "Alright, fine we'll go!"
I think we had ended up watching that movie for about 3 times straight, but I am not sure because after I got through halfway on the 2nd run, I dozed off when Tom Cruise was rescuing Katsumoto.
Chinatown, the weird man, and the
surprise at April's..
Chinatown was fun! Lea knew basically where all the places to go to find anime movies and items because she bought a lot! As the morning turning into afternoon the sidewalks became crowded with tourists pouring into the small shops all the way back to Canal Street trying to find good bargains on stuff, a lot of it black market. The crowds bothered me because there were too many people that I could hardly walk around without bumping into someone! Course then you had large groups of people who were looking at items on the sidewalks and blocking up the flow of people walking. Lots of people were getting irritated by this, including me, so when they pushed to get their way through the large masses, I just pushed back. Lea had a frustrated and annoyed look on her face as she was trying to get past a large group of people to her next stop to find more anime movies. Don't EVER get between Lea and her anime! I could hear her groaning and cursing out loud as she pushed through people. I just watched her and bust out laughing. "Don't you have enough anime for us to watch, Lea?" I called after her.
"No!" She yelled back as she ran into the shop. I laughed and stayed near the shop's entrance. I wasn't going to even try and get into that mess. Street vendors who were selling black market Rolex watches and Oakley sunglasses pestering the tourists as they were walking by the different shops entertained me. I was even more entertained watching them pack up their stuff in a hurry and running down the streets at the first sign of a cop car. I so wanted to yell out "There's a cop coming!" as a trick, but I knew Lea would probably hear me and give me a huge lecture on how I am going to get myself into more trouble.
Then something very weird happened. As I was standing there, I saw a man come out of a shop nearby. He looked around his mid thirties and clearly had some sort of Asian descent. His hair was dark black and he appeared to be around 6 feet tall and was kind of trim. He had white pants that were sort of loose like people that practice martial arts would wear. He had on a covering top with some sort of red symbol but the jacket that he was wearing covered it up. This man seemed to be very different than from anyone else on that street. He didn't make eye contact with anyone, his eyes were set straight ahead as he walked along with the crowd of people past where I was standing. That is when it happened! As I watching this guy walk with my eyes because I was intrigued by him, his head turn and he looked over at me. I mean RIGHT at me. I could feel a cold shiver run down my body as he stared at me. I looked back at him with my own gaze, my eyes and mouth slightly open from fright. He turned his head and kept walking, his face never changed expression. Confused, I watched his back as he walked. Something about him was very different, it kind of spooked me and caught my attention at the same time.
When Lea put her hand on my shoulder, I nearly jumped 2 feet into the air! "Are you okay?" She asked, I could tell she was looking at me worriedly. "You look scared."
I shook my head and looked in the direction that the man went to see him turning a corner. "Yeah, I am fine."
Lea held up her bag full of anime DVD's. "We'll have fun later on tonight watching all of these!" She beamed. I nodded my head but did not reply, I was still kind of spooked by the guy I just encountered.
Well that was the only thing unusual that happened on our trip to Chinatown, but then again this is New York City, when is something NOT usual? What happen at April's that night is a different story and I am kind of glad it did. We reached April's that night around 8pm. It was still light outside, but not that much. Lea was starting to change from being happy to brooding as we walked down the street to April's apartment in Soho. I think she knew she would have to see Leo again and she was not happy. That had to be it, but I didn't ask. This time without hesitation, Lea was the one who knocked on the door. I heard the floorboards creak again as I heard someone come near the door. The door opened and there was April in her jeans, a yellow short sleeve shirt, and a light purple windbreaker. She was dressed as if she was going somewhere or back from somewhere. "Glad you could make it back," she smiled warmly and opened the door wider to allow us to enter.
At first I was kind of down when I followed Lea inside to see that the living room was completely empty. "So they are not here yet?" Lea asked as she crossed her arms.
"No, Don's here," April chuckled. "I made him hide when I heard the door knock. I can't be too careful with them in my apartment you know?"
"So where is he?" I asked, looking around, figuring that he must be in the back bedroom hiding. I felt a tap on my shoulder that made me jump, I let out a cry from the startle.
"Right here," a voice replied behind me, which sounded familiar.
I looked back at him, my eyes wide, and my hand to my chest, trying to slow down my rapid beating heart from the scare. I could actually hear Lea giggle which made me feel kind of better. I looked over at her and smiled some, "How come everyone wants to make me jump like that today?" Don smiled at me.
Lea tilted her head some to the side as she kept her arms crossed, her eyes looking around the room. As I watched her, I almost thought I saw some hint of disappointment in her eyes for a brief second for it did not stay long at all. "You came by yourself tonight?"
"Well actually. Leo and Mikey were going to come over later this evening to get me if that's okay," Don said as he fidgeted some, I could tell he didn't like to be put on the spot. It was almost like as if he was hiding something. What was it? I do not know.
I smiled some. I thought maybe it would be best if it was just Don here and not his brothers as well because that way I could say something and not be judged right away. But April had other plans for this evening that Lea and I were not aware of. I saw that Don made a slight eye contact with April.
"Actually," She began. "I was going to meet Casey tonight in the park for a quick stroll. Would you like to come with me, Lea?" Her eyes were beaming as she smiled cheerfully over at Lea.
When she asked her that, I felt my heart stopping. Immediately I knew what that meant. That mean if Lea went with her then it would be just Don and I in this apartment. I would be alone with this strange mutant turtle. I did pity him, don't take me wrong and I wanted to tell him thank you for saving my life, but I felt VERY uncomfortable knowing that I would be alone with him. I quickly shot a glance over to Lea; she could see the deep fear in my eyes. I wasn't really that scared but I was nervous, extremely nervous.
"No I think I'll be fine here with Melinda," Lea replied which made me feel somewhat better. No offense to Donatello I was just too shy and nervous to be around him alone. The weird thing is that if Leonardo and Michelangelo were there as well then I wouldn't be so nervous if I had to stay alone with them. But this was only one of them. Why was I so nervous and frightened to stay alone with just him? Of all the turtles that Lea and I met the day before, Don seem to be the most quiet.
I noticed another eye glance exchange between Don and April before she spoke up again, "Very well. Lea, would you come with me and I'll fix some popcorn for you in the kitchen. You know just in case you decide to watch a movie or something till his brothers come back. They should be back in about a hour at the latest." She motioned Lea to follow her into the kitchen.
I stood there quietly, looking down at the ground. I looked up some at Don and smiled shyly. I could feel my heart fluttering which made me even more confused. If Lea knew right now how my heart was pounding, she would have probably hit me. I perked my ears when I heard distant discussion in the kitchen between Lea and April but it was so soft that I couldn't make out what was being said. I noticed that Don had lifted his gaze to the kitchen and then back to me. "Would you care to sit down?" He smiled softly as he motioned to the couch with his hand. I nodded politely and sat down on the couch, I could feel my body starting to shake some. Don had taken his seat in a brown cushion chair near the opposite end of the couch that was facing my direction. He sat straight up, as if he was tense about something. I moved my eyes off of him and back to the kitchen, seeing April and Lea walking back out with a bowl full of popcorn.
What Lea said next, shocked me. "Hey, sis. I think I am going to go with April for a while and meet this Casey guy. But I shouldn't be too long," she smiled warmly at me.
My eyes went wide; I couldn't believe what I was hearing! I had no clue what April and her had talked about in the kitchen. For surely I thought she wouldn't at once succumb to the idea of leaving me alone with this mutant turtle that we hardly knew. I was actually surprised that she didn't get mad earlier for April and them changing the plans on us. I looked at her, I wanted to speak up and protest, but I couldn't get my mouth to open. I think she could see the slight uneasiness in me so she said, "I am sure you'll have fun!" She walked over to the door with April following her.
A minute later they were gone. Now it was just he and I. No one else would be at the apartment for another hour. I sat there, unable to speak. I could feel my body trembling from nervousness. The weird thing is that I had no clue why I was so nervous and shy for! He was only a mutant turtle! It wasn't like he was Harrison Ford or anything! I remained sitting on the couch, my gaze off, staring at the blank television set. I didn't want to make eye contact with him. Even if he was quiet; and with my peripheral vision, I don't even think he was looking at me. The apartment grew so calm and silent. All you could hear were the distant sounds of cars going down the road outside and the sound of our breathing. If I wasn't able to hear him breathe, I don't think I would have known he was in the room with me. I could hear the clock on the wall tick slowly by the seconds. I sat there, listening to the sound of the second hand moving, keeping track of how many minutes had went by. Alright, Melinda, just 59 more minutes…