Tropical Nightmare- Chapter 20: Letter at night (Gibbs´ POV)
Disclaimer: I don´t own any characters or anything!
Summary: Tony and Kate are sent to Argentina for an undercover mission, but they have to take a detour.They are bound to find out that atropical island can be a real nightmare -at least if you´re on your own out there...
Additional note: I usually don´t write 1st-person narrator, but it seemed to fit rather well for this little story as the POV changes with each chapter.Also, the use of present-tense is wanted here, eventhough it may seem a bit odd. I hope it´s still readable.
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I look at the ringing cell phone on my desk, but I don´t pick it up.She´s still trying to call me every day. I´ve been thinking about getting a new cell phone, but for some reason, there´s a part of me that doesn´t want to do that. I´m not sure why I´ve reacted this way. I knew that she would be upset about me walking in on her in physical therapy. I knew she wouldn´t want help, but still, I just walked out on her without a word. I wanted to go back and talk to her afterwards, but I´m sureshe´s mad at me for coming in the first place. I feel awful thinking about it. It´s a terrible feeling to lose a friend just like that and I wish I could turn back time and make a different choice.
"Boss? I´m done with the report. May I leave?" I look over to Dinozzo, who is packing up his stuff. It´s Monday and I know he´ll be heading to the hospital to visit Kate right after work. I just nod at him and turn my attention back to the monitor in front of me. I´m going to stay at the office tonight, working through some older cases and updating files. It´s the best way to keep my mind busy. I don´t want to think about what happened. He puts two files back into the cabinet behind me and leaves.
I´m halfway through the files around 10 pm. The lights have been turned off for quite a while already. The screens on my desk give off an eerie, green light that´s just bright enough to see the writing on the old files. I walk up to the small kitchen on the upper level to get another cup of coffee. For a moment, I´m almost sure I´ve heard something down in the bullpen, but when I walk back, everything is calm and the way it has been before. I take a sip of my coffee and put the cup onto my desk.
I continue to work on the file, but then there´s a small envelope stuck between the pages. I´m almost sure it wasn´t there when I looked at the file two days ago. I takeit and look at it more closely. I recognize the handwriting that spells my name and I feel how my heart is breaking apart again. It must have fallen into the file some time ago, because I know there is no way Kate could have gotten that letter here today or even recently. Except when she had someone helping her, Tony maybe, but I don´t care to think about that right now.
My hands are shaking a bit when I open the envelope and pull the letter out. It´s only a few lines on a sheet of lined paper, but it´s written in Kate´s neat handwriting. "Jethro, I know you are probably mad at me for how I behaved last week. I know it was a mistake and I know that I shouldn´t have pushed you back like that. I regret what happened and I totally understand when you want to get a transfer for me. You´ve always been there when I was in need for a friend, you´ve taught me so much about myself. I just wanted you to know that. Kate." The letter says and I feel a cold chill creeping down my spine.
I look around again, listen for something that´s unusual, but there´s nothing. Reading the words, I can hear her soft voice in my head. "It wasn´t only your fault, Kate. I shouldn´t have walked out on you. I knew you would be mad at me for turning up that day, but I didn´t want it to be like this." Isay aloudand fold the letter. There are tears burning in my eyes. I put my head into my hands and feel like the whole world is crashing down on me.
I put the letter in my pocket and grab my jacket. I have to get this straightened out. I realize it´s really late already, but yet, I feel that I need to get this over with. My heart is hammering as I drive towards Bethesda. It´s almost 10:30 pm now, but I don´t really care. I park the car at the front entrance and stare out for a moment. It´s snowing again, like it has for almost two days now. I realize that I haven´t been here for almost a week now. Thinking about it, I really don´t know what made me stay away. Suddenly, I don´t know what made me turn down her calls and shut myself out the way I did. I feel stupid, I would never admit that to anyone but I do.
The guard eyes me curiously when I walk up to his counter. "Sir, visiting hours are only until 8 pm." He tells me and I pull out my badge. He´s still keeping the inner door closed. "Sir, if it´s not an emergency, I have to ask you to come back tomorrow." He insists, but when I draw my gun on him, he swallows hard. "Sir, I have to call the police if you don´t take that gun down immediately."
I glare at him for a moment. "I need to talk to one of my agents -now!" I tell him, but put the gun down until it´s merely pointing to the ground. His finger is still hovering over the emergency call button, but he´s not pushing it down yet. He´s eyeing me curiously, then asks for the name. "Caitlin Todd. She´s up in room 347 in the surgical ward." I tell him and he checks his computer.
There´s a puzzled look on his face. "Sorry, but there´s no one with that name in the hospital. Are you sure she hasn´t been transferred to another hospital?" He asks and I´m resisting the temptation to jump over the counter and check the computer myself. "Let me have a look at the recent transfers." He offers a second later and I try to calm my breathing down.
It´s an instinct they´ve taught me during training at the marine corps. Always be on guard, double-check any information that doesn´t satisfy you. It´s hard to get over something like that. I´ve been at the NCIS for almost twenty years now, but it´s still hard to put off some routines. I could have it much easier, if Ijust call her up, but I feel that I need to do this personally, not over the phone.
"There you go...Caitlin Todd, transferred from Austin Naval Hospital on November 6th, released into private care this afternoon. You ought to try her home address, sir." He tells me and I can literally feel my jaw dropping. I think, I thanked him before I head back to the car, but I´m not sure about it at all. I´m confused. Tony didn´t mention anything about her being released today, nor did Abby or Ducky. Someone must have picked her up though.
I don´t care about any road signs, signals or things like that. Usually, it´s a 30 minute drive from Bethesda to the apartment complex she lives in, but tonight I make it in just under 20. There´s a light in her livingroom and I recognize the car out front. "Abby..." I say to myself as I run up the stairs. I´m not sure why I´m so upset all the sudden. Maybe because I´m not ready for this yet, maybe because I want to apologize to her, maybe because I know I´ve let her down, maybe because I fear that she might not forgive me. I reach the first floor and turn right. It´s the second door on the left. There´s the sound of a TV coming from the livingroom and I hear steps when I ring the doorbell. Inwardly, I try to brace myself -or calm myself, I´m not sure which one it is right now.