Yeah! Chapter 3! 3! I don't even have that many friends! Real ones that is. By real ones I mean people who are actually my friends, not like inanimate objects (though most of my friends are) Anyhoo! Like I said in chapter 2 I'm sorry for not updating. It's truly not my fault. I'm not a lazy writer who doesn't update cause I don't feel like it. I'm coming up with new chapters like every three days or something. I just can't put them up. GOMEN! I hate not having internet. I might as well haul out my word processor and use that for now on since that's all I'm using my computer for anyway. And I worked so hard to get it too!(I babysat my brother everyday after school for two years!) So since I don't have internet I don't know whether anyone's reviewing or not, so if any of you turn blue, sorry! Come fix my computer and the curse shall be lifted. Anyway, on with the fic!
Disclaimer: YYH is mine! It belongs to me! ME, me, me, me, me, me!flashback I'm innocently (not that I'm in any way innocent except that I am a virgin! SICKOS!) sitting their drawing pictures of kurama and hiei, when the door bursts open and some guy rolls in super spy style shouting "Go, go, go!" clutching the gun defensively. "What's going on!" I yell. The man stands up stretching to his full height of 5ft 4in. "Repo ma'am."(Ever notice that that sentence sounds like 'Repo man' and 'Repo ma'am' at the same time? Weird.) It seems you are unable to pay for the damages you've caused." "What damages?" "Sigh. Painting the words 'Just Kill Me' on all the school windows; Hanging up pictures of cows in one of those meat factories, which caused several kids to have nervous breakdowns; hanging wooden stick dolls all over town scaring some old ladies to death; cryogenically freezing flies then putting them in all your classmates lockers, where they unfroze and swarmed out of the lockers when released which could have spread disease; and for not doing your math homework." "That's no true I totally did it! It's just that I needed an anti poser charm really quick and that was the only piece of paper I had!" "Whatever. Anyway, in order to pay for all these damages we are to take your little Yu-Yu-Hakusho idea and sell it to the highest bidder." "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Meanie!sob"end flashback See? Totally own it.
Note: bolda/n, Amy
Recap:
Mr. Chibi: Wonderful! Now then you shall be sitting next to-
Chapter 3 (3!)
Mr. Chibi-Botan. (That's the one with blue hair.) And Hiei, the little Goth guy.
The girl in question was seated at her desk curled up her head in her arms crying over dramatically. (OOPS! I'm sorry I forgot to warn you the absolutely, completely insane, can't believe their same characters you know and love, are totally OOC! Run in fear! Chase me down for being such a monster! Lock me in a padded room forever-which actually if you think about it wouldn't bother me since, basically, all my friends aren't real-But for the love of god don't tickle me!)
Keiko: What's up with her?
Mr. Chibi: Who?
Keiko: remembers scene at door Oh, nothing.
Mr. Chibi: You two don't mind Miss Yukimura do you?
Hiei: When you say mind are you asking us if we mind her very existence? Or if we mind her sitting next to us?
Mr. Chibi: Umm, the sitting one.
Hiei: sticks out bottom lip cutely But, But, WHAT ABOUT HENRY! HUH!
Mr. Chibi: blink blink Who's Henry?
Hiei: Henry! How could you FORGET Henry?
Mr. Chibi: But there is no Henry. Hiei are you imagining things again?
Hiei: You just can't see him because you're only looking with your EYES! Not you're HEART!
Mr. Chibi: Sooooooo……. Who's Henry?
Hiei: sighs loudly Henry? You know. The Hamster. With the purple Mohawk? The one that river dances on peoples heads? (A/N: River Dance is so cool! I'm gonna learn how to dance like that and become Lordess of the Dance! Yeah!)
Mr. Chibi: ohh, yeah, that Henry. I remember now. How foolish of me to forget!mutters Fcking syco! (Ohh my god Mr. Chibi just swore! That's so unlike him! What Have I done? Ruined such a wonderful character worthy of teacher of the year award! Why? He was wonderful the way he was originally written! Oh wait, I wrote him! He's all mine! I could have the guy strip naked and do stand up but it wouldn't matter since I wrote him everything he does is in character! Suckers!)
Hiei: Yeah!
Keiko: Soo, can I sit their or not?
Hiei: Who are you?
Keiko: anime fall
Botan: hysterically Ohh sure! Why not! Sit there for all we care! Hey, I have an idea! Why don't you why don't you hand cuff us naked to a polar bear in the middle of the Antarctic too!
Kurama: Oooh, Kinky.( Yeah! Kuramas here too! Oh, and he's OOC too. Sorry! But it's for the sake of the plot-um, do I even have a plot? Hmmm, I'll think about that later, right now just keep reading, just keep reading, just keep reading… Hey I'm quoting Dory From 'Finding Nemo'!)
Hiei: What's 'kinky' Kurama?
Kurama: You aredrools (and when I say drools I mean a national flood alert was initiated.)
Hiei: Neat-O! I'm a WORD! Take that! Nefarious!
Nefarious: You a! I hate you! I hope you and your lover are happy!Leaves room crying like a spoiled little 5 year old that you wish would just choke on her own extremely healthy lungs
Hiei: Hee, Hee! That guys so silly! I am happy! gets horrified expression on face gasp But what if Your Lover isn't happy? What if he's missing something in his life? sob
Kurama: Or his pants.
Hiei: Why would Your Lover be missing something in his pants? gasp what if he's in one of those creepy cults where they cut off his thing for a purification purpose! DON'T WORRY YOU'RE LOVER! I'LL GET YOUR THING BACK! EVEN IF I HAVE TO DO IT WITH MY OWN BARE HANDS!
Kurama: I really wish you would.
Keiko: How do you know it's a guy?
Hiei: Well obviously it's a guy. Girls don't have anything in their pants!
Keiko: But no one ever said that Your Lover is missing anything in his pants! So we don't have any evidence that it's a he, she, or He/She!
Hiei: Yaha! Kurama said that He was missing something in his pants! So it must be true if Kurama said it.
Keiko: He didn't state it as a fact! He stated it as a suggestion! Blinks Hey wait a minute, you're the kid with the sniper!
Hiei: No I'm not.
Keiko: Yes you are! I can see you hiding it behind your back!
Hiei: Um, Um, shifty eyes Run Suzan! I'll Hold them off!Hiei throws 'Suzan out the third story widow and starts doing crappy, fake, Karate moves. Shouting out threats same while his mouth moved at a comepletely different rate than what he was talking.
Kurama: Quietly praying- ok. Not really. Everyone could hear him Please take your shirt off. Please take your shirt off. Please take your shirt off. Please take your shirt off. Please take your shirt off. Please-
Everyone(except Hiei, since he's a total ditz in here): O.O WHAT THE FCK!
Kurama: glances around sheepishly ahh, heh heh heh. Just kidding! GIANT sweat drop ;
Random person: to other random person Hah! You owe me 6.95! I told you he was swinging for the other side!
Random Person 2: Why do you care? It's not like your gay or anything.
Random Person 1: No! Of Course I'm not! I'm straighter than Ricky Martin! shifty eyes
Random Person 2: O.O; But Ricky Matins g-
BANG!
Random Person 2: YOU SHOT ME! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SHOT ME! I'M BLEEDING! I AM BLEEDING VERY BAD. I SEE A BRIGHT LIGHT. IT'S BEAUTIFUL. I SEE FLAMES. LOT'S, AND LOT'S, AND LOTS, OF FLAMES. IT'S BURNING DOWN HERE! OWWW! STOP POKING ME! NO I DON'T WANT TO BE A SPIT TURNER! I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS! AHHHHHHHHH!
Mr. Chibi: to random person number one Clean this mess up young man! I don't want you to ever shoot someone again! You got me? Now since this is your first time-
Random Person 3: No it's not! He's done it before! I swear! He's just in denial about the fact that he's gay!
Random Person 1: I am not in denial!
Random Person 3: You're so in denial, you're in denial about being in denial!
Keiko: Since you're not in denial does that mean you are gay?
RP1: No! I'm not gay! AHHH!runs out similar to how Nefarious did.
Speaking of Nefarious, he was so upset about Hiei's little comment that he was about to jump off the school roof .Where RP1 just so happened to be headed.
Nefarious: good bye cruel world! Remember me as the guy who was but a word.
RP1: Dude! Whatcha doing?
Nefarious: I'm gonna jump! I have nothing left to live for! I'm a 14 year old virgin for Christs sake! How can I continue on like this!
RP1: If I sleep with you do you promise not to jump?
Nefarious: Sure!
RP1: Okay then! Let's use the principles desk. He's out doing the nurse anyway.
Nefarious: Okay!
See everyone's happy! Except RP2 who's dead of course. But who cares? Oh and 14 is way too young to be sleeping around. 16 is a more acceptable number. Then you're not a whore, just a slut.
back to the classroom
Hiei: Kurama, What's 'gay'?
Kurama: I really hope you are.
Hiei: Huh?
Kurama: Um, it means 'happy' Hiei.mutters Just like how I'd be if you were gay.
Hiei: But I am Gay Kurama!
Kurama: grinning like a loon REALLY!
Hiei: Yeah! I'm Happy! See?Grins widely
Kurama: ohh, Yeah.
Hiei: And now were both Happy! I just wish Your Lover was too.sigh
Kurama:sigh Yeah, me too. TT(anime tears)
Hmmm… we haven't been seeing Mr. Chibi for a while now, I wonder where he could be?
Mr. Chibi: Here I am!
Keiko: Jumps ten feet in air Dude! Whereve you been? We haven't seen for a while now.
Mr. Chibi: The authoress couldn't find any use for me so she sent me away until she could find use for me.
Kurama: What was that like?takes out notebook so he can take notes, for you see many a soul has wondered of what goes on in the inner workings of my mind, yet few make it back sane to tell the tale
Mr. Chibi: well, it was weird. Really weird. All these odd creatures and people kept popping up out of nowhere and talking to me about really random stuff then just disappearing right in the middle of the conversation!
Kurama: And how did that make you feel?
Mr. Chibi: I didn't care really. They weren't actually talking to me. What really freaked me out was that the world kept changing! One minute it's this really dark looking world with tons of cute animals and stuff then it's like the fcking apocalypse! The skies would get all red and demons would start popping up out of the ground… It was scary! Then it'd get all rainy and depressing. It really all depended on her mood.
Kurama: How many times a day would you say, did her mood change?
Mr. Chibi: If she was listening to music, it could change five times in one minute. If not, seven times an hour.
Kurama: Which mood scared you the most?
Mr. Chibi: When she was hyper. That girls got a seriously twisted imagination!
Keiko: Wait a minute; you said she'll only let you out if she has some use for you. What does she want?
Mr. Chibi: What? Oh yeah! I had an important message! mutters Where did I put that bloody script? Oh Yes! Hear it is! clears throat loudly Ahem! (Drum roll please!) smoothes shirt, fixes hair, clears throat again, gargles some water, tunes voice, does some stretches-
Keiko: Get on with the bloody message!
Mr. Chibi: jumps at the sound of Keiko yelling at him Oops! Sorry! ;
Keiko: mutters stupid teachers, never doing anything right, always annoying the crap out of everyone-
Mr. Chibi: YOU WANT THIS MESSAGE OR NOT?
Keiko: yeah, sure, whatever.
Mr.Chibi: Good. Now, ahem-stops clearing throat when he sees keiko starting to sharpen her dagger collection.(where she got a dagger collection I have no idea) Anywho! The Message is; 'Where's Yusuke?'
Everbody: Anime falls
Kurama: That's it! That's the big message from the inside of the Authoresses mind? 'Where's Yusuke? Youv'e gotta be shting me!
Hiei: O.o OOOHHHH! Kuramaaaaaa ssswwwwooooorrrrreeeee!
Kurama: blush I'm Sorry Hiei! I was just frustrated! I mean besides the fact that I'm extremely horny…
Keiko: eyeroll We didn't need to know that.
Kurama: shrug I'm 14 what do you expect?
Keiko: O.o; …..I don't…..know….
Hiei: Hugs kurama It's okay Kurama! You're only human!
Kurama: smiling brightly Thanks Hiei!
Keiko: By the way, who's Yusuke?
TBC
A/N: MMWWWAAAHHHHAHAHAHAHAH!
You thought I forgot about Yusuke huh? Well I didn't! He's coming up in the next chapter! Yeah! And More Kuwabara Bashing! More Erotic Kurama! More Silly Hiei! More everything! AND….. I found my socks! They were on my fan! I don't know why….O.o;; Oh well- One of life's little mysteries I guess!
Ja Ne!(see ya later) Yeah exactly six pages-