Disclaimer: I still don't own NCIS :'(
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Family Ties – Part 2
Tony sat on the overcrowded train, staring out of the window. Ordinarily the large number of people on the train would have caused all of Tony's senses to go on high alert, watching out for anything hinky, as Abby would so eloquently put it. Today however, although his body appeared to be looking out of the window, his mind was lost in thought.
- I wonder who will be at the meeting. Obviously my father will be, and wherever my father goes so do his bodyguards. I hope he still has Luigi and Mario fulfilling those posts. Perhaps my brothers will be there too. It's possible, unless they're out on a job. -
Tony had mixed feelings about this meeting. He was looking forward to seeing his family again because, although he had chosen to leave that life, he had had a very good relationship with his family. His father's temper was unpredictable and Tony knew he had definitely failed in his duties. His brothers had never gotten to know Gulia but they still believed strongly that you should protect your family, no matter what the cost and that older children should protect their younger siblings even more than the parents. Tony hoped that they stretched that belief to mean even from the parents because then he would be safe. - Gulia I'm sorry. I shouldn't be worrying about saving my own ass now because I wasn't covering your back. I got too wrapped up in my family at NCIS that I forgot who my loyalties should have been with. I hope that you can forgive me. –
Tony smiled as he imagined Gulia looking at him the way she always had when he messed up. A lopsided smile danced on her face as she tried to stop herself from laughing and instead look stern. Her eyes would sparkle like emeralds being hit by the sunlight. She would point her slender finger at him and in her most exaggerated Italian accent say "Antonio Zito don't you dare go beating yourself up over little things like that. I would be very unhappy if I heard that you were feeling sorry about something you had no way of stopping." At that point both of them would start laughing so hard they were almost crying. Tony never felt bad about whatever he had done after Gulia spoke with him. She was one hell of a little sister; the best anyone could ever hope for.
Tony didn't wipe away the tear that ran down his cheek, instead he let it fall; a reminder to himself that he would never again be able to look to his sister for support. No longer would she hold him in a tight embrace that took away his pains and fears. Her small body had held such strength and her intelligent mind was capable of amazing compassion. He closed his eyes and remembered being hugged by her; one hand on his back, supporting him, the other behind his head stroking his hair in such a calming manner that he felt nothing in the world could ever go wrong. He would put his arms around her shoulders and bury his face in her neck. He remembered how her hair always smelt of strawberries and how safe it had made him feel.
Remembering the last time he spoke to his boss, Tony's face once again found a little smile. - Sorry Gibbs but your hugs can't compete with my sister's. Thanks for being there when she couldn't though. -
Tony had sat in the elevator for at least ten minutes before his phone had started to ring. It was Gibbs. Not wanting to answer the call, Tony had just gotten up and set the elevator moving again. He had known his face was stained by the tears he had just shed and that his cheeks and eyes would be puffy and red but he hadn't care. He had walked straight past Abby and ran up the stairs to Gibbs' desk. "I'm sorry boss. I…"
"DiNozzo. Walk with me." Tony had hung his head and silently followed Gibbs down the elevator and outside. "Are you ok Tony?" Gibbs had asked with genuine concern in his voice.
"No. I need some time off to go and tell my family about Gulia's death. I have to tell them that I failed her. No-one else can tell them, it would be too dangerous." Gibbs had just nodded.
"I will give you as long as you need. Do you want someone to go with you?" Tony stopped walking and stood staring at the pavement before facing his boss, tears glistening in his eyes.
"No. I have to do this alone. To tell them how I failed them all." Tony's shoulders shook as the tears began to fall again. Gibbs couldn't bear to see such grief on the young man's face and stepped forward, putting his arms around him.
"Shhh... Tony. It's going to be ok. It wasn't your fault, she was involved in a hit and run, you couldn't have stopped it even if you had been standing right next to her. It wasn't your fault." Eventually Tony managed to stop crying and pulled away from Gibbs' embrace. He sniffed loudly, choking back the last of the tears.
"Thanks boss but it's not going to be ok. I should have been able to do something. Well, thanks for the support. Is it alright if I leave straight away? I should be back in a week" - If I'm still alive - Gibbs had nodded silently before patting Tony's shoulder and heading back to work.
That had all happened yesterday. That night Tony had called his father and told him that they needed to talk, it was an emergency. His father had replied with, "Fine. Little Italy Pizzeria, 1900hrs tomorrow. Come alone and don't be late." Tony knew the drill and repeated what his father told him before hanging up. He out his jacket against the window and tried to get some sleep. It was going to be a long night tonight and he would need his wits about him.
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