Finding a cure
Almost all the characters are not MINE! I wish they were. I just made Sara-Beth's personality and Ky'rac. That's it. The lyrics aren't mine, they are to the Rascal Flatt's song "Skin (Sara-Beth)"
"Sara-Beth," Jacob's voice comes to my ears, I slowly open my eyes. There he is, holding the memory-recall-device in his hand. I look into his eyes and he speaks up again, "Are you ready?" I nod slightly and brace myself against the pain as he puts it in. "Ready?" he asks, I nod grimly as he activates the device.
Bethany and I were sitting outside today when a moving van pulled up. We watched the people moving the stuff in. The man who moved in was a sickly looking man, but he had cancer, so it was not that surprising. Mom took me over to meet him after the moving men left. Bethany and I had to help move stuff. The man's name is Jacob, he moved here to Colorado Springs to be closer to his daughter, Sam. Jacob used to be a General in the US Air Force, and Sam was a Captain at the time. Jacob said she worked on deep space telemetry in the mountain.
I open my eyes, "Not it," Ky'rac says to Jacob. I close my eyes gamely and try again. This time I'm closer to the desired time, but still not there.
It was three weeks since Jacob moved in, and I still had the bruise I got helping him move in. Mom took me to a doctor last week, and the test results would come in the next day. Something felt wrong, and it bothered me. I didn't know what to do, but at least one thing was going right. Michael, the most popular and handsome guy in my grade asked me to go to the prom with him! I couldn't wait!
I open my eyes again, shaking my head, Jacob goes to say something, but I close my eyes again, submersing myself in the past.
We got the test results back on this day. They came back positive. I had Leukemia. I never thought it could happen. People like me don't get cancer, we're young, healthy, smart; we can't get cancer. Cancer is something older people get, not healthy people like me, the tests had to be wrong. I felt like the world is spinning out of control, falling down around my ears, I couldn't tell what was real and what was not. Nothing seemed real any more, I felt like I'm in a bad movie, a nightmare, and I couldn't wake up. I went over to Jacob's, but he wasn't there. Mom said that Jacob got hospitalized, and I couldn't even go talk to him, I couldn't go get any support. I needed someone to be there, someone who understood how I feel. I was just so scared; I didn't know what to do.
I open my eyes again and Jacob speaks, "You don't have to keep doing this, you know, Sara-Beth,"
"I know, but I'm gonna keep doing this until I find the right one," and I close my eyes again...
That morning, I woke up and when I looked at my pillow, there was so much hair on it. It was so scary, I had hoped it wouldn't happen, but it did. I broke down, I had to hug Mom for hours on end and it was so hard on me. I didn't know how every one is going to react; I didn't think Michael will show up on prom night. I'm so scared. I wanted to talk to Jacob, but he was gone, no one would tell me where he was. Sam came with several people and cleared out Jacob's place. I asked her where Jacob was, it was hard for me to get up, but I really wanted to know.
"One more shot," I say, as I open my eyes. I hold my hand up to make Jacob stop. I don't want to stop until I can remember.
I had been sick for two years when the military men showed up at our door. There were four of them; one woman officer, a man officer, a young man who had nothing to suggest that he might be military, he wore a checkered, light blue shirt and navy blue pants, and another man who wore a cowboy hat which covered his forehead, he was wearing a tight black shirt and blue pants. The young man looked at me and I saw his sky-blue eyes well up with tears of pity that I could see even though he had glasses on and his hair the color of a wheat field in the sun falling down into his eyes. I could tell that he was looking at my bald head and I got mad; I couldn't stand it when people brought attention to it. I turned away from him, towards the older man, the military officer with the gray hair.
"My name is Colonel Jack O'Neill, I'm here to speak to your mother," The military man said to me, with a near feelingless voice that must have come from being hurt too much, because I saw his eyes mist up as he looked at me, and his voice cracked as he spoke to me.
"Why?" I asked, I was bothered enough by their being here, why now of all times? What did they want?
"We called your mother and father beforehand," the military woman said, her voice tight as if she was the most touched by my illness. "We think we found a way to help you," she said, her voice was sincere, so were her eyes: an honest green, and brimming with tears; I really believed her. "I am Captain Sam Carter, we're with the Air Force," I went to get my mom. That name was familiar to me, a name that for some reason rang through my head, telling me that I should remember something, but it slipped away from me, like sand between my fingers. As I hurried off, running being to tiring and just a fanciful exaggeration at my state, I heard them talking to each other, not enough to make out the words, just enough to hear that they were talking.
"Mom, there're some people at the door for you, they say they're with the Air Force," when I said this I saw Mom's face light up with hope, the way it had with love and admiration the day that Michael showed up, head shaved out of love, and she smiled, eyes brimming with tears.
"They're really here?" she said, she sounded hopeful and as if she was about to cry. I nodded. She took a tissue and dabbed her eyes, then she straightened up and took my hand. We walked to the front door where the Colonel, the Captain, and the other two were still waiting. "Hello, I am Mrs. Halak, Sara-Beth's mother. Please come in," she opened the door wider, allowing the four people into the house and off of the narrow landing of stone that we called a porch. We went into the sitting room, and I nearly passed out on top of the young man with the golden hair.
"Mrs. Halak, we recently discovered a method of curing cancer, and we are offering this cure to your daughter, though, if she accepts, she will have to stay at a military hospital for a while in order to make sure that it works. We know that it works with some people," the one called Jack said once we were all seated, looking at Sam during this last part, his eyes were a warm, strong brown, and they seemed to hide something in their depths.
"How many people have you tested it on?" I heard a weak voice say, a voice I recognized, and hated; my own voice, ragged and breathless, as if I had just run a mile, I wanted to be strong, no matter what the cost.
"Actually," the one called Sam said, "Just one person, but he had stage four cancer and would have died in less than a day; he's living and getting along well today"
"Who is he?" I asked, interested although asking meant hearing my own voice.
Sam's eyes misted over and a tear hung, contemplating the oblivion that lay below. When she spoke it was a voice I am familiar with, edged with near forgotten pain and suffering too fresh. She looked me in the eye and said two words, words that I will hear ringing through my heart forever; "My father," as she said those two words the tear leapt into the oblivion, only to fall, with a near silent splash, onto Sam's hand folded softly on her lap. The one with the golden hair comforted her, I wondered who he was. Her brother? They looked very much alike. Her lover? She wore no ring, but they might be dating. Or perhaps her college; this seemed the most logical; why else would he have come to help an unfortunate bald girl?
"Mom, I want to do it," I said, my blue-green eyes soft with tears but hardened with purpose I looked at her and she smiled weakly. For some reason those two words tore at my heart, making my eyes well up with tears for this man I couldn't have known, but seemed, by the way Sam talked, so familiar to me.
"Okay, Sara," Mom said to me, her eyes to glistened with tears, threatening to overflow, but tempered by pride, pride over me.
"What do I have to do?" I asked the group, my raspy weak voice constricted my many emotions.
"You'll have to come with us," the man with the golden hair said to me. I nodded and said good-bye to my mom. If I had to leave everything I ever knew behind, I would do it. As we left the house, I saw for the first time in a year, the remnants of my once well tended garden. It now was overgrown with weeds and all the flowers were dead, taken over by the crabgrass and dandelions. No longer were the remaining plants in neat rows, but haphazard roses and blackberry bramble fought out an existence in what had once been a flourishing garden with fruits and flowers.
The four-some led me out to a van where I met Sam's father, General Jacob Carter. His name was familiar, and he seemed to know me, but the roaring of the emptiness in my memory forbid me from knowing if I knew him. His eyes softened after several minutes, he thought I would know him, I knew that much, but like water in a sieve, or sand in an hourglass, my memories flowed away from me, making a mockery of the person I once was. Even as I tried to hold onto those precious grains, they slipped silkily through my fingers, scattering across the floor of my world, obscuring what little remained. I might as well have been trying to hold onto smoke for the good it did.
It seemed to me that Jacob was schizophrenic, but I am to polite to ever comment about another's disability, it would be foolish of me to do so in my state. The van went to the airport where we took a flight to Colorado. Once there, we were taken to another van which took us to the Cheyenne Mountain Complex.
We went inside and they led me down a ways, but I passed out. The next thing I knew I was laying down in a hospital bed with a redhead woman shining a light into my eyes, so I groaned. "Welcome back to the land of the living," she said as if this was an everyday occurrence, which I soon learned it was. She turned around; "Contact General Hammond, she's awake," one of the other people left the room. When they came back, there was a man with them.
"My name is General Hammond," he boomed, he was Texan. I squinted to see him, my eyes weren't focusing properly, and I had a slight headache. Once I could see him properly, I noticed that he was bald. I was glad that he did nothing to hide his bald head, it gave me strength.
"Are you," I started, only to be cut off by a vicious fit of coughing leaving me gasping for breath. The red-head woman helped to put an oxygen mask on me. Once I could breathe again, I tried once more to ask my question. "Are you going to help me to get better?" He looked at General Carter who had come in just moments before. Instead of General Hammond answering, General Carter answered in the voice of his second personality, the one that everyone called "Selmac".
"General Hammond can not help you, Sara-Beth," he said his voice all gravelly and deep, "I am the one who can help you, along with Ky'rac". All I could do was think "Oh god, the CRAZY guy's gonna' help me, great".
Not wanting to be impolite, I rasped out a question, "Who is Ky'rac?" my voice sounding as if I had had all the sand of the Mojave desert in my throat for the past month, all sore and tight.
"I will introduce you in due time, Sara-Beth, but first you must be told everything," he said in his Jacob voice. "Don't be afraid, Sara-Beth, you won't be hurt"
I laughed; the laughter came out harsh and sliced at me, as if it had all sorts of sharp angles as if to keep it from leaving my mouth without slicing it apart. "I've been going through treatment for two years," I said, my eyes welling up with tears of pain, the words had become hard and jagged, cutting my mouth with every one. "The fear has become a living, breathing part of me," this was true, I could feel it, the ever present lump that sat on my stomach, "I'm ready to get rid of it, no matter what the cost. I'd do anything short of dieing to get rid of it because dieing is definitely NOT an option," my words, stronger than any since I started Chemo, seemed to hit General Carter hard, might he have felt the same way when he was in a similar situation? The two Generals looked at each other and nodded, what ever they had in plan, I could make it through. Once I was able to stand, General Hammond took me to his office and told me a truly inventive Science-fiction story; it seemed reminiscent of that old show, Animorphs. "I don't understand, sir," I said. "Why am I here?"
"Just take a look out of that window over there," he said, it was not a suggestion, and it was a bit odd to see this window; we were well under the mountain. I made my way over to this window; I looked out and saw a huge ring, similar to the "Stargate" in his story. "It's all real," Hammond said to me, and I didn't doubt him because a voice suddenly came over the P.A. system.
"Unscheduled Offworld Activation," a klaxon alarm want off with bright lights flashing. I passed out right then, lights flashed all around me, they should have been red, but the color was off, and I spent some time drifting in and out of consciousness. I woke up to see General Carter standing over me. I saw his eyes glow and passed out again. I saw a pool of water before me. I woke up in a crystalline tunnel, no idea where I was, facing a dieing old lady on a table. I felt a sharp pain in the back of my throat and blacked out again.
As I slept, I dreamed that I had lived for hundreds of years. I felt feelings that weren't mine, I saw memories that weren't mine, and I knew things that I couldn't have known. I woke up after this strange dream. I blinked twice to clear my vision, I saw Jacob/Selmac, Sam, Jack, Teal'c, and Daniel, I had no idea how I knew their names, it didn't come clear to me for a while. My memories came flooding back to me, not the memories of the dream, but mine from before Chemo, faces, names, feelings and sounds. I wanted to leap for joy and cry for weeks on end at the same time.
I looked back at Jacob, and I remembered. Jacob was my neighbor, he had moved in next door to us to be near his daughter Sam. I looked at him, my eyes welling up with tears that I shed for no reason other than that they were there for me to cry. I hugged Jacob, Sam, Daniel, and Jack. I would have hugged Teal'c, but as I went to do so, he gave me a look that made me back up. I could tell that he was different; he had something that Sam had, and Jacob had. I couldn't understand it.
"Selmac?" I felt myself make the words but I didn't say anything. My head went down and I could control my body once more. "What was that?" I asked, suddenly realizing that my voice was my voice again, not the Chemo voice, but my own musical voice, my voice that always sounded like music. Tears swelled back up in my eyes, tears of joy.
Now Daniel spoke, brushing his wheat colored hair away from his eyes. "That was Ky'rac," he said, as if that was explanation enough.
"Ky'rac?" I asked, nearly sang.
"The Tok'ra symbiote you saved," Selmac explained. He put his head down and Jacob explained a bit more, "Ky'rac also saved your life," it was then that I realized that he was not schizophrenic, but he had two different "people" living inside of him. He was Tok'ra.
"Incredible," comes Selmac's voice, having seen my memories on the screen. "And to think..." his voice trails off and I look up at him.
"See, that's what happened," I say, recalling in distaste the way Daniel had looked at me back then. My hair is long now, the same long blond hair I had when I first met Jacob. I smile slightly at him as Selmac tries to assimilate the story he just heard.