Disclaimer: I remembered! Woo! I don't own Naruto. Come on, did you seriously think I did?
Viewers 1-3 were watching TV, when they flipped to channel 18972. They were overcome with joy when they heard a familiar jingle.
Lalala, it's time
You know what's goin' down
Let's turn on the TV
Turn that smile into a frown
Wan wan waaaaaan,
Funky!
"Yes!" cried Viewer #1.
"Wow!" Viewer #2 clapped.
"Duuuuude," Viewer #3 said.
Yes, Ladies and Gentelmen, Pirates and Ninjas, Swabbies and Shinobis. It was Funky's Special Show, the show that, after annoying Kakashi, had not been seen for well over 3 weeks!
Funky ran onto the screen, holding an oversized microphone. He was about to speak into it when he peered off to the left, apparently reading the teleprompter.
"I don't need this microphone?" said Funky. "You say my sister told me to use it because it looks stupid? And now when I read this out loud I sound even stupider? Whatever!" Funky turned and cleared his throat. "Yes, we're back! And our first new person is..."
A drummer boy from the Revolutionary War ran across the screen, drumming.
"Ino!" Funky threw the microphone at the drummer boy, who passed out and who's feet could be seen sticking out onto the side of the screen.
Ino walked out, clearly annoyed. "What is it? You interrupted my Sasuke worshipping."
"It's Special Guest Ino!" yelled Rain from the side.
"I'll show YOU special!" yelled Ino, hands on hips.
"Riiiiiiiiiiiight." Rain's voice faded into the implied distance.
"Anyway, before I was stupidly interrupted, it's Ino's turn to be annoyed!"
"What are you talking about?" said Ino.
"Ino and Sakura are MORTAL ENEMIES." Funky wagged a finger. "Which is why you should never have them within 40 feet of one another, mainly because of the restraining order. And that's why we have Sakura here today! Back from her previous injuries! Like a miracle!"
Sakura walked over to Funky. "It's a cheesy anime miracle, all right!" she said cheerfully. "Although I never did figure out who pushed me into the-"
"Ah, yeah," Funky interrupted quickly. "Not important. It sure wasn't my idea, if that's what you're saying. ANYWAY, it's fun to have Sakura beat Ino with some kind of hair product."
"Ooh, can I?" Sakura clasped her hands together. "Please? Please?"
Funky handed her a can of SuperHold hairspray. "Extra-large!" he exclaimed. "Knock yourself out! Or, more importantly, knock INO out!"
"WHAAAAAAT!" Ino stared angrily at Funky. "What kind of joke is this, you freak!"
"Unyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" screamed Sakura, charging at Ino. Then she sprayed the hairspray in Ino's eyes. "Do not spray in eyes! AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!"
"WAUGH!" screeched Ino, hands flying to her eyes. "MY EYES! NOW HOW WILL I BE ABLE TO STARE AT MY PICTURE OF SASUKE!"
"TAKE THAT, INO-PIG!" cried Sakura, still spraying. "SASUKE'S MINE!" When the can was empty, she dropped it and ran off.
"Since Ino can't see very well, now-" started Funky.
"You!" screeched Ino. "You are INSANE!"
"Why thank you," said Funky, bowing. "I'm flattered. But, I have something to tell YOU." Funky winked at the screen. "You know, Sasuke made out with Sakura."
"Yeah, right," scoffed Ino. "He'd never make out with Forehead-Girl."
Funky shrugged. "Well, look at what I taped." He held up a small TV screen.
Ino squinted, trying to make out the image on the screen.
On the screen, someone's hands were bashing together the heads of two misshapen wooden dolls, dressed like Sasuke and Sakura.
"I can't see!" Ino blinked a few times.
"Yes, you can!" Funky laughed. "You just don't want to face facts!"
Ino's already-burning eyes flared. "I'M GOING TO KILL THAT GIRL!" she screamed, running off. There was a muttered curse as she was heard bumping into a tree.
"Okay." Funky waved at the screen. "It's time for me to leave you, fair viewers! But we'll be back next week, with a new Special Guest!"
Rain ran onto the screen, accompanied by Quigley. "Hi-CHAAAAAA!" she yelled, at no one in particular. "It's time for Nate to PERISH!"
"Truly enlightening," said Viewer #1.
"We're really faithful Viewers, you know," Viewer #2 said.
Viewer #3 thought for a moment, then added, "You know, someone should be paying us!"
Wow, that came out better than expected. Okay, expect more hilarity next time! Rainbows and fuzzy bunnies! Just kidding. But there will be snacks! And someone trying desperately to get to them! So review! And I'm sorry this one took so long...You'll be proud to hear that I made a full turn-around and am now an avid Naruto addict, instead of an anti-Naruto jet-pilot. Maybe I'll still be a jet-pilot, though...