Hours had passed. The two men sat in opposite corners, staring at each other. Either dared to sleep. Neither wanted to blink. They just stared, neither trusting, neither knowing what to do, and almost not caring. Almost.

He remembered what Abrams had said. "You friend ain't what he seems to be." Rodney found himself wondering how much of that was true. After what happened . . . no. No, it was reaction, it was desperation, it was a man driven to the edge. He had let Rodney go. But that was after . . . but he let him go. He acted on his own judgement.

Something was tickling the back of Rodney's mind. Something he had seen, or read, or written. It came to him slowly, a phrase that had been in his head since they first entered hell. "Judgement day."

Rodney had finally blinked. He no longer looked zoned out or detached. His eyes regained focus.

"What did you say?" Carson's voice was hoarse.

"I said judgement day. I can't believe I forgot."

"Is this a holiday I'm not aware of?"

"No. It was something I was researching, something that I though might have to do with the orb I was studying. I had found a reference in a text regarding a orb of great power that was used to test for a pure soul." He straightened and cleared his dry throat. "You see, when the ancients first started researching ascension, they thought that only the purest soul could ascend, and so they rigged these devices, these tests, to see who was pure and who wasn't. And that orb, I think it was such a device."

"So . . . does that tell you where we are?"

Rodney winced slightly. "Inside."

"What – wait, what? Inside?" He slowly stood. "We're inside that bloody thing?"

"Sort of."

"Well, how the hell do we get out?"

"I'm not sure. I didn't get that far. But I'm pretty sure it has to be done from the outside, and not in here. Otherwise the test subject could just leave when things got a bit tough."

"A bit tough?" Carson laughed, turning away to face the wall.

Rodney was instantly on his guard, half afraid Carson would loose it again. "I think we're being tested. Actually, considering your reaction . . . I think you're being tested."

"For ascension? Are you daft?"

Rodney shook his head rapidly. "It doesn't know! We got here by accident, but it doesn't know that. It just knows to run the test."

"Then what about the others? It just decide to test them too?"

Rodney closed his eyes. "I don't know. I haven't figured that out yet."

"No. This isn't about me!" There was no way. He wouldn't be held responsible for this.

"Oh, come on, Carson, think about it!" Rodney snapped his fingers. "Wait, wait, I heard Lenore said she's you. Now I dismissed it at the time, but maybe, just maybe, she was a part of you, and-and acted out that part."

"And what about you! Are you a figment of my imagination too, then?"

Rodney thought about it, and smiled humorlessly. "Why not? If there's one thing I learned early on in quantum physics, it's that everything is an issue of perception. No one sees the world the same way." He took notice of Carson's puzzled expression. "Okay, look, we two see things that no one else sees, that no one can possibly see. And we each see it differently. You look at people, and you see them as walking work," he raised a finger as Carson rolled his eyes, "no, stay with me, don't get all huffy. You see the medical aspect. Elizabeth sees the social aspect. I see how it all interconnects." He threaded his fingers as an example, then lowered his hands, his eyes taking in the room around him. "We all see things differently. The person you see as me, isn't who I see as me. Therefore, it is an illusion created by your mind, by your own perception. Make sense?"

Carson wasn't sure which was more disorienting, the subject or the way Rodney was discussing it so calmly. "Disturbingly so. So how did you come up with this?"

"Try studying the inner mechanics of the universe at four am with no sleep and five cups of coffee."

"And time here to contemplate it."

"I think you're the only one who can get us out."

Carson shook his head incredulously. "You are daft!"

"Not with the degrees I have."

"Explain yourself, then!"

"Well," Rodney pointed to a small panel, "it came to me when I first noticed these. Now if we were on Atlantis, I could access these panels and the controls inside. But these may as well be empty for all I understand them, and some actually are, and its because you don't know what's in them. You don't understand the mechanics on the same level that I do." His hands were moving, graphically underlining his speech. Now he reached out towards Carson, begging for him to understand. "You couldn't design it. You needed something familiar, something from the station. Well, these little access panels are everywhere, especially outside the infirmary. I bet you've wondered about them."

"Yes . . ."

"And they started appearing on the walls. They weren't already here, there's no design to compensate for them, no reason for them to be here. I think you're trying to create something without realizing it."

"You're crackers."

"Carson, there's no other explanation!"

"Then how did I get us here?"

"I don't know!" His speech over, he threw up his hands uselessly. He stared at a spot on the floor, then snapped his fingers and looked up. "What were you thinking when you entered my lab?"

Carson frowned as he thought back. "I – I heard from Louise that . . . oh god."

"Oh god, what? What is it?"

His eyes widened. "Remember the accident on M42-5223?"

"The one that knocked out half the city?"

"It was out fault, we tried to help, but we had so many injured coming through. I couldn't count them all, let alone save them. I felt overwhelmed, and useless. I felt like I was trying to do the right thing, but more kept coming, and all because I . . ." he paused, unable to continue.

"Kind of felt like Hoff all over again."

His expression darkened. "A bit. And some of our men were down. Three died."

Rodney swallowed before asking slowly, "Not Shaw, Burkes and Abrams?"

"No. Three others. But I saw Lt. Shaw and company on the way to find you. I passed them in the hall, there were a lot of military personnel there."

"So . . . you conjured them here."

Carson visibly shook the memories away. "But why? And what of Lenore?"

Rodney shrugged. "I don't know. She was scared, yet reasonable." He looked up. "Maybe they represent something. I guess the soldiers could be protection."

"But they couldn't protect anyone."

"Exactly. And they died here."

"Go on."

"Lenore . . . maybe she represented your reason. Your ability to keep your head. I mean, when she died, you . . ." he twirled his finger meaningfully in the air, not wanting to dredge up bad memories. Of course this whole place was nothing but a bad memory. "Look, I'm guessing here, odd as that may sound." He changed the subject, taking a step closer. "Why were you coming to see me, Carson? Why were you coming to my lab?"

Carson exhaled loudly, his face a reflection of the growing confusion he felt inside. "I – I was going to tell you what was happening. I needed to talk."

Rodney looked mildly surprised, his interrogation halted in its tracks. "And you came to me? For that?"

"For god's sake, we are friends, aren't we? Isn't that what friends do?"

"Sure, I'm just. . .I . . . thank you." Embarrassed, he turned to gaze at the panel. "What were you feeling?" His voice was smaller as he wrestled with the sudden notion that someone would seek him out for personal reasons.

Carson ran his tongue along his teeth, stalling. His eyes rolled to the ceiling as he gathered his thoughts, and he started to pace, slowly. "To be honest, I was scared to death. Everything was happening too fast. I couldn't keep up, and once things ebbed, I needed to get away. What I really wanted was to hop the first flight back to earth, and I – I guess I needed a reason not to."

"You wanted to leave Atlantis?" Rodney's voice was still small. It was evident he felt uncomfortable with the close conversation.

"Aye. But when I saw you there, I realized I couldn't." He stared at his feet. "I've never felt a part of a team as I have here. It isn't home, and it isn't my family, but it's what I have." He sighed. "I genuinely care for you, all of you. I can't leave you here to face the dangers alone."

Rodney turned. His eyes were soft with emotion. "That's it."

"What's it?"

"That's how we got in here. You needed an escape."

"Wha — I didn't need a bloody place that kills people!"

"No one is really dead, Carson!"

"Then what do you represent? Why aren't you 'dead' along with them?"

"I don't know. What do you think?"

"Arrogance, tunnel vision, pig-headedness. . ."

"All perfectly honorable traits, but what do you really think?"

Carson shook his head and backed away. "No. I don't know."

"Think about it."

"No."

"Carson! I'm the only one left! I'm your way out, now think!"

"No!"

"THINK, DAMN YOU!"

"TRUST, OKAY?" Carson yelled, his emotion and exhaustion bursting forth.

Rodney looked stunned. "Say that again?"

Carson didn't want to. "God, Rodney, you represent everything there is about Atlantis. The uncertainty, the fear, the craziness. But most of all, trust. People put their lives on the line for you, and you do the same. You come up with more solutions than five of your scientists combined. You are the one we look to when we need a fix. You have the ear of everyone on that station, whether they like it or not. They may not like you, but they trust you."

"Not always."

"They trust you, Rodney."

Rodney sagged, suddenly feeling the weight of Carson's words. They, not we. "You don't, do you?"

Carson turned away, unable to answer.

"You don't trust me?" He laughed humorlessly, then rounded on him. "How can you not trust me? You, of all people! You're my oldest friend here!"

"I . . ."

"Tell me!"

"Maybe because I've no reason to!"

"What?" This time the laugh was one of pure disbelief. "I saved you from that Wraith! Remember that?"

"Actually I recall saving you from him!"

"I — distracted him!"

Carson sighed. "You did, Rodney, and I know you'd be there for me in a pinch . . ."

"Then what's the problem?"

"The problem is. . .I don't know. I don't know!" He flung his hand towards him in irritation. "You seem to know everything, you figure it out!"

"This isn't my concern!"

"And it's no longer mine! Do you understand?"

He was yelling, and Rodney could sense the anger rising, and the confusion, and the fear. "Carson?"

"No! I'm tired of the self-analysis! I want to go home! You hear me?" he yelled at the walls, "Home! I want to go back to Atlantis! NOW!"

And everything went black.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It wasn't what he expected, and it nearly gave him a heart-attack. Radek heard a loud noise, turned, and tripped over Dr. Carson Beckett.

"What the . . .do prdele!" His eyes widened as he sat up from his tumble, and scampered to his knees, bending over the prone doctor. One shaky hand tapped his earpiece as the other feebly checked for a pulse. "Colonel Sheppard! Get back here, we've got them!" He carefully rolled the unconscious man over, checking for injuries, and seeing none. Dark lashes fluttered for a moment before opening to reveal vivid eyes.

Carson jerked upright as Sheppard stomped into the room. "What the hell?"

"Colonel! Radek!" Carson's head snapped from one impossible view to the other. His eyes blinked in astonishment, frantically taking in the tilted view of the science lab. He pushed onto on elbow, feeling hands on him. "Oh my god . . . we're back?" He put his hand to his chest and fell into Radek's arms. "We're back."

"Back from where? And where's Rodney?"

"Rodney?" Carson darted a glance around, and scrambled to sit up. "Rodney! Oh crap . . . you mean he isn't . . ."

There was another loud sound, a flash of blinding light, and a crumpled figure on the floor appeared at Sheppard's feet. Sheppard yelled out and jumped back, then bent over his friend.

"Oh thank god," Carson crawled to him and pushed Sheppard aside, turning Rodney over carefully. He slowly glanced up at the men who stood over them. Neither one looked like they knew how to deal with the situation.

Carson returned his attention to Rodney, checking his pulse, feeling his forehead, looking for signs of injury. He heard a voice, heard it again, then was aware of his name being called sharply. He blinked, realizing he was staring up at the ceiling, and Radek's arm was beneath his head. "I'm calling for Dr. Tinsdale."

"No! I'm fine, really, just . . .reaction I suppose." He fully expected Radek to comment on his head injury, and was surprised when nothing was said. A hand carefully lifted to his injury.

There was nothing but smooth skin.

He looked at Rodney, at his neck, his arms, his head. There were no signs of injury at all.

"What the hell happened to you two?" Sheppard asked as Rodney gave a classic loud stab at consciousness.

Carson could only shake his head. "I honestly have no idea."

Sheppard nodded, and keyed his comm, saying the words he had been craving to pass on for a while.

"Elizabeth! We've got them!"