Sleep was avoiding her. Olivia had been ready to collapse gratefully into bed, but that was before the hospital. Before Alex. Gregory had managed to go to sleep and her side of the bed waited patiently for her, but she couldn't stop pacing. If she stopped moving, she saw Alex.

Alex smiling and telling her the cancer wasn't anything to worry about. That everything was fine. She had been an excellent liar. "We didn't suspect. No one suspected anything, you had us all fooled Alex." Olivia murmured to herself. Alex had hidden her condition so well everyone who knew her was still in shock. Gregory had shut down. She couldn't blame him. Everything seemed to be so stacked against them. Alex had been their cheerleader, a confidant for both of them. Whatever secrets she held were gone now with her. Olivia sat down on the bed again, looking out the window to the sea.

She wanted to wake Gregory and beg him to take her away again. Back out to sea where the only sound she had to hear at night was the water. Of course they couldn't. There was too much to be done. Alex had to have a proper send off in her next, greatest adventure. Bette and Roger would be handling that. They had the emotional fortitude to do it. Neither Gregory or herself would have been up to the task.

Olivia wasn't even sure she if she would make it through Alex's will tomorrow. Thankfully, Alex had been thoughtful enough not to put them through a video like Del's. Lillian had promised it would be brief. Even in death, Alex was direct.

She left the bed for the bathroom, perhaps another glass of water would banish her headache. She should just try to sleep. Gregory would be worried about her in the morning. He'd invariably get that concerned knot in the middle of his forehead. Deciding to take a more active role against her headache, she found her purse on top of the dresser. The aspirin bottle was near the bottle, neath her checkbook. Her fingers hit something hard, plastic and unfamiliar.

In the haze of her insomnia, Olivia didn't remember the pregnancy test until she pulled it from her purse. She shoved it back to the bottom, putting her hand nervously over her womb. Gregory seemed nearly certain she was pregnant, reminding her time and again that she didn't just 'get seasick'.

What type of irresponsible would it be to be pregnant now? Yes, she had wanted it as much as he did, but that was before Cole St. John. Before her life was reducing to a bargaining point in a madman's game. Would Cole use an embryo as well? Was he could enough to exploit the extra bit of vulnerability being pregnant would give her?

Olivia swallowed her aspirin and the rest of her water. Of course he was. Cole had proven he was a monster. She remembered the inhuman look in his eyes. the sick twist of his lips as he wrapped his hands around her throat. No one had ever shown that kind of pleasure in her pain before. Terror raced through her, not for herself, but for the innocent life she could be exposing to that monster - If she was pregnant.

It could still be explained away. Nausea was stress, being under the near-constant threat of death would make anyone queasy. Headaches were from exhaustion, the soreness of her body from helping Gregory with the boat. She wasn't pregnant. She couldn't be. The timing was all wrong. Olivia sighed heavily, realizing all the reasons she could collect for her not to be pregnant would invariably become the reasons why she was.

Gregory was surprised to see Caitlin at breakfast. He couldn't recall the last time she'd been present for a meal. Getting, coffee, he sat down across from her. "Good morning."

Caitlin looked up, surprised. "Hey daddy, I thought you were Sean and Ethan." She stood up to kiss his cheek, unexpected pleased to have him to herself.

"I didn't think they got up this early." He pointed towards the open Sentinel. "Finished?"

Caitlin pushed the paper over. "Vanessa Hart must have been at the hospital last night, Alex is the exclusive."

The harsh response she expected was instead a relieved sigh. "So she finally found something other then that dammed thief to write about?" Gregory asked rhetorically as Caitlin's shock faded into a smile.

"Yeah," She took a sip of orange juice as she watched him look the article over. "She said some really nice things about Alex and her work."

"Good." The feature story was indeed all about Alex, using the picture from the inside cover of her Africa book. Looking at her now was more difficult then Gregory expected, and he had to set the picture aside. "I'm glad it's a good article."

Seeing him put it aside surprised her. "Aren't you going to read it?"

"Later." Gregory promised softly. "Later." The silence that followed between them was more uncomfortable then she had ever imagined it being in the past.

"What are you thinking about?" Caitlin ventured finally, resting her hands on the table and wishing he'd trust her. Like he used to.

Gregory looked up from his coffee, almost started she was still there. "I'm sorry sweetheart, what did you say?"

Caitlin reached across the table to take his hand, feeling the metal of his wedding ring against her palm. "You look like there's a lot on your mind."

He picked up his coffee cup and set it back down without taking a sip. Caitlin was right, but nothing in his thoughts could be shared with her. He couldn't tell his daughter that he had accidently kissed Alex, thinking she was Olivia. He couldn't tell her how Alex had confessed her love him and Olivia had taken it in stride. Gregory couldn't explain how much he loved her mother in that moment in the hospital room.

Instead of turning on him as he certainly would have done in her place, Olivia had trusted both of them. Putting her faith in her belief that neither would betray her, even in their hearts.

Yes, Alex had loved him, and yes he had his own share of unresolved feelings for her. The problem was there, waiting to blaze into a conflict that would have destroyed them all - except for Olivia. She knew something Gregory dared not admit to himself. Olivia knew that she possessed him in a way no one else could. Not even Alex Mitchum.

Caitlin was still staring at him. "Hello- daddy? You were really gone there for awhile." She smiled, as if she knew exactly what he was going to say. "Come on daddy, you can tell me."

He was worried about her moving out, she told herself. That had to be it. She'd been gone so much lately, he must have missed her. Even started to wonder if she was indeed moving out. He'd be so happy when she explained she wasn't. Caitlin waited, expecting him to say something at any moment as he sipped his coffee. She was ready to reassure him. She would stay as long as he needed her.

"I was just thinking about your mother. She didn't g to sleep until early this morning." Gregory looked out the window into the morning, entirely missing the way his daughter's excited expression faded into a look of pure hatred.

"Maybe you should go check on her." She suggested as she tightened her knuckles until they were white in the tablecloth.

Gregory looked back to her, the faraway look in her eyes giving way to a softness she rarely saw in his face. "I think I will, tell your brother good morning for me when he gets back."

Smiling made her face sting with effort. "I will." Caitlin tore away from the table as soon as he was out of the room. She had to tell Cole. They had both agreed to hold off just long enough for her father to deal with his grief over Alex. Caitlin didn't want to put him through any undue pain, but he wasn't even thinking about Alex. Her mother had him completely brainwashed and Olivia was going to pay dearly for taking Gregory away. Cole would see to that.

Gregory found Olivia lying in bed, her back to him. Praying silently she was asleep, he circled the bed. She was wide awake. Her eyes were open and she had his pillow clutched to her chest. "I was hoping you'd be asleep."

Olivia shook her head, moving over so he could sit on the edge of the bed. "I can't."

He reached down, laying the back of his hand against her cheek. "You're not trying very hard with your eyes open."

"Darling- I can't." She protested sadly. "I can't close my eyes without seeing her."

"Alex didn't suffer Liv." Gregory ran his hand comfortingly down her cheek. "Roger said she was smiling- happy."

"How could she be happy?" Olivia asked in a tortured whisper.

"You know Alex." Kissing her cheek almost made her smile. "She couldn't have wasted away. She had to go while she was still herself."

Olivia closed her eyes, deciding to believe him. Gregory started to fidget with a stray lock of hair at her shoulder.

"What do we do now?" She asked finally.

He tucked her hair back behind her head. "Get up, take a shower, come have breakfast with me."

Taking his advice, she sat up slowly. "You didn't eat yet?"

Gregory leaned forward to kiss her forehead. "No darling, I waited for you."

Sean, Ethan and Belle returned midmorning, meeting Bette as she walked up towards the house.

"Now, who's this-" She teased as Belle sniffed her hand. "Pretty small for a pony I'd say."

Sean grinned. "She's for mom."

"A little extra security." Ethan added, removing the leash and letting the huge St. Bernard explore the living room. "Computer systems are one thing. Dogs have a human touch."

"She's adorable," Bette pronounced as the brown and white face turned towards her, showing off a pair of gorgeous brown eyes.

"And she knows it." Sean added as Belle sat in front of Bette and raised a paw.

Laughing good-naturedly, Bette took the giant paw and shook it. "Pleased to meet you." Belle barked once, a deep echoing sound.

"She was my mum's." Ethan explained proudly as Belle fell in step behind them on their way to the dining room. " Lillian picked for her Olivia because she's a lady's dog. Only listens to men if she really, really likes them."

"Ah." Bette noted as she fluffed the soft fur. "She should get along famously with your mother then, won't she cutie?"

Gregory nearly dropped the coffee pot when he heard barking in his living room.

Olivia shrugged when he looked at her. "I have no idea. Unless Spike magically grew ten-times bigger overnight.."

Bette appeared from the living room, followed by Ethan and Sean. Taking an orange prescription bottle from her purse, she set it in front of Gregory. "Dr. Livingston sent these as a gift. You're going to need to take one in the morning and one before bed." She winked at Olivia. "Livie can remind you."

Examining the bottle, garnered Bette a raised eyebrow from Gregory. "So you boys really did it?"

Sean nodded, deeply pleased with himself as his father downed his new allergy medication. "She's huge."

Retreating to the far side of the table behind his wife, Gregory sighed. "You still think this is necessary?"

Both boys nodded. "She's been my mum's since she was a baby. She'll kill for Olivia." Ethan promised seriously. "I'll grab her leash and bring her in."

"What's going to kill for me? And why is Roger giving you drugs?" Olivia tried to read the faces around her, looking especially to Gregory's quiet apprehension.

"Livingston is trying to keep Gregory from sneezing himself to death over your new security system." Bette promised. "And you're going to love her, she looks just like that dog Vincent used to have-" Snapping her fingers, she tried to remember the name. "That one who loved Gregory so much."

"Ripper?" Olivia asked softly, hiding a smile behind her hand. "Ripper loved you darling."

Gregory groaned as he remembered. "That thing wanted to kill me and all of you thought it was funny."

"He liked you." Bette corrected firmly.

"He liked to make me sneeze. Damn thing knew I was allergic." Gregory finished as Ethan led Belle in on a leash.

"Everyone this is Olivia's new bodyguard, Belle." Looking down at the dog, he snapped his fingers. "Say hello."

She barked once and Sean took the leash. "Ethan used to take her to shows. She's really smart mom, watch." Sean snapped his fingers again and moved his hand in a circle. Belle trotted around him and sat at his feet when he lowered his hand. Reaching down he undid the leash and pointed to his mother. "Belle, this is my mom. You're going to keep her safe."

The St. Bernard took a few steps forward. Sean looked up at his mom and held out his hand. "She has to smell you."

Olivia stood from her chair and shyly held out her hand. "Like this?"

Ethan took her wrist and held her hand out, palm up. "Just like this."

Belle sniffed, seeming content as she waited, tail patiently wagging.

"Now, get down to her level and look in her eyes." Ethan advised as Gregory kept to his corner of the dining room.

Olivia looked at her son for confirmation and Sean nodded. "Dogs are about trust mom. You have to show her you trust her."

Feeling rather foolish, she knelt down anyway, looking into the huge brown eyes and pink nose. "These two young men would really like us to get along." Olivia explained gently. "Do you think we can manage it?"

Belle demurely licked her chin and barked as Olivia sprang up, giggling.

"There you are." Ethan announced proudly. "Friends already."

Sean ruffled Belle's soft ears thoughtfully. "I think she likes you mom."

Olivia pulled him into a hug. "I think she's lovely Sean. Thanks for looking out for me."

Slightly embarrassed, Sean snapped Belle's leash back on to her brown leather collar. "I think I'll take her back out, haven't shown her to Mark yet."

Ethan pointed to the kitchen door. "Let's steal some breakfast first." With the boys in tow, Belle disappeared happily into the kitchen.

Olivia sat back down, smiling at Gregory's bemused expression. "You supported this? You hate dogs."

"I supported Sean." Gregory explained as Rose set muffins and scrambled eggs in front of them.

"Thank you Rose." Olivia remarked mechanically.

"So, Sean wanted the dog?" Bette supposed as she reached for a muffin.

"Sean thought Olivia would be safer with a dog around. Though we still have that mutt-" Olivia looked at him sharply and he corrected himself.

"Spike, Sean wanted something intimidating. Ethan has quite a collection of dogs in England and he was willing to bring Belle over." He opened a muffin and buttered it, handing it to Olivia on a small plate.

Touched, she patted his hand in thanks. "It's sweet of you to listen to him like that."

"And good that you found some common ground with that handsome son of yours." Bette pointed out as she took another muffin. "You can worry about Livie together." Ready to leave, she stood. "But thanks for the breakfast, I've got to run back to Livingston, we still have a few things to work out before the service tomorrow."

"How is Roger doing?" Olivia wondered as she toyed with her muffin. "We haven't heard from him since last night.

Bette favored them both with a sage smile. "He'll be all right. Just tough to lose a friend like that. Alex's death was a shock to all of us." She explained, easily keeping Roger's secret. "See you this afternoon."

"Goodbye Bette." Gregory waved a hand lazily as he started on the eggs. Bette nodded to him and waiting, hands on her hips for Olivia to acknowledge her leaving.

Gregory finally got her attention by taking her hand and she jumped, nearly spilling her coffee. "I'm sorry." Olivia offered as she steadied her cup.

Shaking her head, Bette chuckled dryly as Gregory bailed out his wife. "Bette was just telling us she'd see us later."

"Oh." Olivia blinked. "Later then."

"More coffee." Bette suggested as she left through the kitchen.

Gregory watched Olivia continue to pick at her muffin, taking it apart piece by piece. "Are you going to eat it or destroy it?"

Olivia dropped her hands to her lap. Cheeks flushing with guilt. "A little of both, but more of the latter I guess." Shaking her head she pushed it aside. "I'm sorry darling."

Studying the vacant look in her eyes, Gregory took the plate away. "You feeling all right?"

Getting up to get her coffee cup, she missed the question.

"Olivia?" He touched her shoulder as she sat back down. Finally gaining her attention.

"What?" She asked innocently. "What did you say?"

Gregory was tempted to suggest she go back to bed. "I asked if you were all right."

"Fine." She answered quickly, too quickly for him to accept it and he waited, staring at her until she decided to be honest. She sighed heavily, feeling her chest sink towards the floor. "I can't stop thinking about Cole. I know it's selfish of me."

"It's not selfish at all."

"But I should be thinking about Alex. I should be grieving. I should be explaining to Sean that I'm not in enough danger to need a bodyguard, canine or otherwise. I should-"

Gregory stopped her with a hand under her chin. "Sean feels better knowing you're protected and Alex is in a good place." He promised her firmly. "She, of all people. wouldn't want you to feel guilty." Continuing, he started another muffin for her on a new plate. "And you're dealing with your grief as best you know how. You'll deal with our loss in your own way. Perhaps not when you expect it."

She took the muffin. This time biting into it gratefully. "You're right darling." Olivia admitted as she swallowed. "The funeral is going to be awful."

He rested his hand supportively on her arm, feeling her flesh beneath the silk of her robe. "I'll sit next to you."

Nodding slowly, Olivia took another bite of her muffin. "It wouldn't be so difficult if we didn't have to worry about Cole all the time. I wish Del had never given the jewels to me in the first place. I just want to throw those damn things away."

Gregory listened, then snapped his fingers, feeling suddenly brilliant. "Get rid of the jewels," he repeated as he stood up and kissed her forehead. "Can't believe I didn't think of it. I'm going to make a few calls."

He pointed to her plate. "Finish breakfast, I'll be right back."