Ok well guys. First off, of course the thank yous. Its amazing that I've got over 40 replies already and its only been like 20 some days. Thank you guys so much.

Second, sorry that this post is so long. I really want to catch you guys up to where everyone else is at. After this chapter there will be another chapter (equally long).

Anyways, thanks for all the support I've been getting. Means a lot. Keep the replies coming and I'll keep writing.

Chapter 10 - Changes

Tommy walked back to the parking lot with Chris right behind him.
Tommy: "Damn it Chris." he shot at her fury consumed his eyes.
Chris: "Look I didn't know this was going to happen, it wasn't my fault, but we need to talk."
Tommy: "What did you think was going to happen? You showed up at Jude's best friend's wedding. What was so important that it couldn't wait?"
Chris: "You and me." she let out innocently.
Tommy looked at her. She looked so innocent and there was a time not so long ago that he wanted that innocents. A time when he actually pictured himself in her presence.
Tommy: "There is no you and me. We kissed. That was it." He said softly not wanting to hurt her feelings. His anger was toning down. Why couldn't she understand that he loved Jude?
Chris: "I refuse to believe that. I know you have feelings for me." she said not giving up.
Tommy: "I thought I did. But I was wrong. When Jude came back I realized she was the only one for me. When I thought she had found someone new, it killed me inside. I couldn't think of her with anyone else. I couldn't care less if you had someone in your life. I am sorry but it's the truth."
The words hurt but she knew he was being honest. Chris knew it was a long shot for her and Tommy but it was one she had to take.
Chris: "Ok……………Just tell me you did feel something. Tell me I wasn't imagining it." she reached for his hand. He looked down at her pleading eyes and took his hand back.

Tommy leaned against his Viper. The wind blew a little and it caused her hair to fly. She was beautiful but she wasn't Jude. She wasn't the one.
Tommy: "I did feel something. I think I was infatuated with you. It was nothing like what I feel for Jude. I am in love with her." he stopped. He saw tears in Chris' eyes and he knew he hurt her but he had to tell her the truth. He couldn't lead her on anymore. Then finally went on "Look, Jude and I have been through a lot. She is the reason I get up in the morning. We share something I've never had with anyone. I don't expect you to understand it. I know it hurts and I am sorry. I really am but I need her. I am nothing without her."

He stopped realizing what he just said was the dead honest truth. He could deny all he wanted that he could be without her but deep inside he knew better. He knew Jude was the reason he was alive today. He knew Jude was the one that picked him up every time he was down. She was the one brining him back to life when he was ready to give up. No one could ever live up to her. He couldn't understand why she couldn't forgive him for that one stupid kiss. That's all it was, one kiss. Nothing more. If she loved him so much why was it so hard to move past one mistake?

Chris: "That's what you want? Fine. But have you ever thought about what you're going to do if she doesn't forgive you? I don't think Jude is taking you back any time soon. Don't coming running back to me."

Again he was thrown to a place he didn't recognize. A place full of pain but a place that was real none the less. He never thought of that. What would he do if Jude never forgave him? He watched Chris walk away. The wind was picking up. Jude's words hung in the air "Tommy come out of this fantasy world. There is no US anymore." he couldn't shake her no matter what. All he wanted to do was forget about everyone and let go of everything, if only for one night. He knew just the thing to make his troubles go away.

20 minutes later Tommy arrived at a bar in Downtown. Sitting down on a bar stool he ordered a beer. One beer turned to two, two turned to three. Again, one shot of tequila turned into two, two into three and so forth. Slowly but painfully he was beginning to forget. A headache took over his mind but he didn't care. He kept on drinking his sorrow away. The more he drank the further the beautiful red-head in his mind became. He sat there at the bar drunk watching some bikers play pool. Deciding to join the fun he walked up to them.

Tommy: "Ok now." hiccup. He reached in his pocket and took out a bundle of money. "Who wants to play me?" hiccup. The men just looked at him and laughed. Tommy went on "What? Is something funny?….." hiccup. "…….Cuz I think you could……." hiccup "…….use a new leather jacket."

Before he knew it his cheek met with the biker's fist. Thrown to the ground he couldn't get up. Too drunk to even comprehend what just happened and too weak to try to fight back. The biker kicked him a few more times until the owner started to yell "The Cops will be right here. BREAK IT UP." The bar cleared out but Tommy remained on the ground, bloody and too weak to raise to his feet.

Few minutes later the place was swarmed with cops. They took Tommy in custody, him being the only one left behind. Once they arrived at the police station they took mug shots of him and his fingerprints before throwing him in a cell. Two hours later he was allowed a phone call. When he reached the phone on his shaky legs the only number he could remember was Jude's. Hesitating for a moment he then decided to dial it.

Jude: "Hello?"
Tommy: "Jude? How are you, my love?"
Jude could tell something was wrong. Tommy was too loud and there was a hoarsens in his voice, besides the fact that he would never call her his love.
Jude: "Tommy? What's wrong?"
The police officer took the receiver from Tommy.
Cop: "Ma'am. Mr. Quincy was arrested tonight for getting into a bar fight. Is it possible for us to release him into your custody?"
Jude was speechless. Tommy was in jail. Now he had done it.
Cop: "Ma'am? Are you there?"
Jude: "Uh yes. What jail is he in?"
Cop: "County Memorial."
Jude: "I'll be right down."

Half hour later Jude bailed Tommy out and the police officer walked her to his cell. He unlocked it and Tommy walked out barely being able to stand on his own two feet, still so drunk. His dressy shirt, tux and nose were bloody, from the fight. His hair was a mess. His eyes were blood-shot and red. Jude had never seen him like this. He tried to stand up straight but tipped over and leaned on Jude for support. She threw an arm around his back as he leaned on her and they made they're way to her car. She sat him in the passenger's seat and went to her driving position. On the road Tommy was rambling on.

Tommy: "Jude, I am sooooo sorry……." hiccup. " ……..I didn't mean for you to see me like……" hiccup. "……….this".
Jude kept quiet and stared straight ahead. He smelled of alcohol. Without giving her a notice Tommy threw himself over his seat and onto her. He tried to kiss her while she was still in driving mode.
Jude: "Tommy, STOP IT. I am driving. Are you trying to kill us both?" she yelled pushing him off her with her free arm. He obeyed. His breath was unbearable. Who was this guy? She didn't recognize him.

15 minutes later they arrived and walked up to his apartment. Jude was flooded with memories. Happy memories. He hadn't changed anything. Everything was the same. Tommy threw himself down on the couch and motioned for her to follow him. She sat her keys and purse down on the counter and looked over at him. He wasn't the man she once loved. He had changed. Aged. Not his appearance but everything else. It was as if his soul was carrying a huge burden.

Jude: "Tommy." she called but he was now looking up at the ceiling. "TOMMY!" she tried again. This time he turned to her. "Can you go and take a shower? Your clothes are all bloody and you smell." she asked him. He had this distant look on his face. His eyes pierced right through her. What was he thinking about?

Tommy: "You are so beautiful." he said answering her question.
Jude: "Tommy, come on, go take a shower." she walked over to him and helped him get up. His eyes were closing. He was tired and wanted to sleep.

"God what did I get myself into?" she thought

Jude: "Come here." she was standing right in front of him. He looked right at her but his eyes would flick open and then close again. She took his tux jacket off and then spoke.
Jude: "Raise your arms in the air." she commanded. He did so. She pulled his button-up shirt off and threw it on the floor. He stood there. Shirtless. She had seen him this way too many times but she could never get enough. So many memories flashed back of them two together, causing her to look away. Tommy saw this.

Tommy: "It's Ok Jude. We're alone." he whispered. The stanch of alcohol pulled her right back to reality.
Jude: "Tommy, take off your shoes, I'll be right back." she said and walked out in the hallway and into the bathroom. She let the water run from cold to warm and walked back inside the living room where Tommy stood. Completely clothes-less. She looked away embarrassed. Why was she feeling this way? It was as if she had never seen him like this before. He walked over to her.
Tommy: "I miss you." he kissed her cheek but she didn't turn towards him. "I love you, Jude." he whispered. Jude grabbed his hand and pulled him behind her to the bathroom, not looking back at him. She was getting weak and that was the last thing she needed right now.

Jude: "Step in." she said pointing to the bathtub, looking him in the face. She never looked down. He followed her instructions but slipped and fell. Jude laughed. She couldn't help it. His head stuck out in the bathtub, underneath all the bubbles. His eyes flung open as he hit the hot water. She poured some shampoo on his head and ran her hands through his hair. Tommy smiled. He loved the attention.

Tommy: "This is the way things should be. You and me. JUST you and me." he said pointing first to her and than to himself. Jude looked down at him. Here she was bathing him like he was a child. Taking care of him like nothing happened. Worst thing was, she didn't even mind taking care of him. She actually enjoyed it. Once she was done, she made him stand up and she washed away all the soap left sticking to his body.

Jude: "Get dressed." she said and walked out of the bathroom before he got out of the bathtub and revealed his private parts. While Tommy was dressing Jude went inside the living room and picked up the clothes he had taken off. She threw them in the washing machine and went to his bedroom to get his bed ready. The picture of her and Tommy was still on the nightstand. She picked it up and held it to her chest, eyes closed.

Tommy: "It can be like that again, if you just let it." he said pulling her out of the trance. Jude quickly sat the frame back on the nightstand and jumped off the bed.
Jude: "Come on, you're tired." he walked over to the bed, in his boxers, and slipped under the covers.

Jude pulled the sheet over him and turned to leave but Tommy grabbed her arm. She tried pulling away but he was stronger, causing her to spring around in fast motion. She fell right on top of him. His chest pressed against hers. Her heart picked up a few beats. Before she could even start to lift herself up it was too late. His lips were already against hers. Jude tried fighting back but he wouldn't let her go. Not this time. So overtaken by his possession of her she finally gave in. He felt her ease up in his arms and his right hand made its way up to her head and through her red hair, pulling her closer. His other hand slipped under her shirt and gently went up and down her back.

After all this time, lighting still struck. Maybe bigger than before. Jude caved in. She relaxed herself on top of him forcefully running one of her hands through his damp hair while the other hand held his cheek. He let out a little moan, anticipating her next move. His lips massaged hers. He picked his head up a little bit and pulled her even closer.

She allowed herself to go back to a place she promised herself she never would again. Tommy had this power over her and he knew it. She could never fight him off. She never wanted to. She loved the way his body felt against hers. The heat that came from both of them. The kiss lasted minutes. Minutes of ignited passion and love. Minutes of long awaited longing. Minutes of Hell and Paradise all at the same time.

Tommy tried pulling Jude's shirt off causing her to jump up off of him. She looked down at him. His cheeks flushed. His eyes still a little red. His lips craving hers just like hers were craving his. She wanted him but she knew she had gone too far. She wiped her mouth and bit her lip. Tommy was getting out of bed.

Jude: "No, Tommy stay. This was a mistake." she said. He stayed down.
Tommy: "No it wasn't. I know you felt it."
Jude: "I better leave."
Tommy: "No, please. Just stay here with me. Please. I promise I won't try anything. Jude please." he pleaded.

Jude looked down at him. She knew he needed her. Against her better judgment she sat down next to him on the bed. The side that had once belonged to her. He turned towards her and took her hand in his. Jude wanted to pull away thinking it was another scheme but he was harmless and weak. The alcohol was wearing off. With his free hand he turned the lamp off and sat his head back on the pillow, closing his eyes. Jude looked at him. He looked like an innocent, little boy holding onto her hand. She smiled. She had always loved watching him sleep.

Tommy: "Jude, who is Mark Cullman?" he asked half asleep. She froze at that name.

Jude: "How do you know about him?" she asked frightened.
Tommy: "It was on TV. They said he had something to reveal about you." he barely whispered, but still noticed that she didn't want to talk about that man.
Tommy: "Jude, it's Ok. You don't have to tell me. I am sorry." he whispered. Jude lowered herself a little. They're faces were only a couple of inches apart but his eyes were closed.

Jude couldn't say anything. He should be sorry. She lost they're son because of him and he didn't even know about it. Tommy felt her gentle breath on his face and opened his eyes only to find her an inch away. How could she have been so close but so unreachable?

Tommy: "I promised myself I would never become him. Look at me now." he said. Jude knew who he was talking about. His alcoholic father. A tear left Tommy's eye and she could see that he was really hurting. She hated seeing him like this, it hurt her too. She gently put her free hand on his cheek. He caved into it and smiled a little. Her familiar touch is what he missed most about her. The way she always knew what to do to comfort him. It was a part of her and she was a part of him and always would be. Forever.
Jude: "You will never become him. You're so much better than that." she whispered and wiped his tear away. He shook his head.
Tommy: "No, I am not. I hurt you. Jude, you have to believe me, that was the last thing I ever wanted to do." she knew he was being honest. She knew he would never intentionally hurt her. He went on "I swear I didn't know she would show up at the wedding. I told her that I loved you, only you."
Jude kept quiet. She didn't know how to respond. His voice was getting softer and lower. He was drifting off to sleep.

Jude: "I love you too." she whispered knowing Tommy was asleep. She freed her hand from his grip and got out of bed. Once again, she pulled the sheet over Tommy, kissed his forehead lightly and left the bedroom.

The next day Jude was woken up by her cell ringing, in her own bed. She stretched out her hand and reached for the phone.
Georgia: "Jude, honey. Can you stop by the studio?"
Jude: "Georgia? Huh?"
Georgia: "Sorry to wake you up, but can you come by?"
Jude: "I'll be there in an hour." she said rubbing her eyes with her free hand.

After brushing her teeth, showering, eating a bowl of cereal, getting dressed and saying bye to her mom and Nick, Jude made her way to G Major. She had no idea what Georgia wanted but whatever it was she wanted to get it out of the way. She wanted to move past the chapter of her life that involved all things G Major.

Arriving at G Major she made her way straight to Georgia's office and knocked. Georgia yelled for her to come in and she did.

Georgia: "Jude, I called you here because I need you to sign these forms." she handed Jude the papers.
Jude looked at them not knowing what they were: "What are they?" she asked.
Georgia: "Just a formal statement releasing you of all the duties relating to G Major. After you sign this you are officially released from us. Are you sure you want to do this?"
Jude looked at Georgia and than at the papers again. She picked up a pen from off the desk and signed the papers.
Jude: "Georgia I know you're mad at me bu-" Georgia waved her hand.
Georgia: "No Jude, I don't blame you. The years you've been here you've been like a daughter to me. I didn't want to lose you but I rather you go than stay here and hurt. I don't hold you responsible for anything. Just know that whenever you want to come back, there will always be a place at G Major for you. You will always be part of the family."
Jude smiled and hugged the woman.
Jude: "Thank you for everything. Just because I am leaving G Major doesn't mean I am forgetting about all of you."
Georgia: "I know honey." she kissed Jude's cheek and tear left her eye.
Georgia: "Jude there are some things you left behind. You should get them. They're in the storage closet in the basement."
Jude: "Ok, I'll go right now."

They hugged one more time and Jude went to the basement. The knob was rusty but she managed to open it. Once she entered the basement she found a box labeled "Jude H." she picked it up and sat it on the floor. Inside she found her digital camera. She listed through it looking at the pictures. A lot of them were of her and Tommy. There was one of them kissing in the studio that Kwest had taken. Another one of Jude showing of her engagement ring. A few were of Kwest and Amy, others of Georgia and Andy. There was one of EJ talking on her phone. Nothing surprising there, EJ was always on the phone. Jude smiled as she listed through the camera's memory. There were so many memories. Good, happy memories.

The door swung open at the top of the stairs and than closed after a shadow walked through. The person ran down the steps and stopped in shock when they saw Jude sitting on the floor with the camera at hand.

Chris: "Oh ……….Hi Jude." she said surprised.
Jude rolled her eyes: "Bye Chris." she said in a mean tone. She got up off the floor, picked up the box of her belongings and walked towards the door. When she reached for it the door knob wouldn't turn. She tired again, harder this time, with more force, this time the door knob fell completely off.
Jude: "Oh my God." she said, Chris walked to her and saw what had happened. They were locked in together and there was no way out but through that door.
Chris: "How did that happen?"
Jude looked at her annoyed: "How you do think that happened, genius?"
Chris: "Look you don't need to get an attitude with me. You don't like me, I get it."

Jude ignored her and sat down the box. She started to bang on the door but no one came. No one would for a while. Nobody ever went down to the basement. It didn't help that it used to be another studio, which means that its sound prove. After banging on the door like crazy for over 10 minutes Jude gave up and sank to the floor. Chris joined her seeing it was worthless, for now, to let her frustration out on a door.

Jude: "Why did you come down here in the first place? No one ever does."
Chris looked at Jude. She had no choice but to answer. They were locked up together might as well try to get along.
Chris: "I come here sometimes, when I want to be alone and need to think. For some reason I get inspired in here."
Jude understood that. She was the same way. How did this happen? How did she end up with the person she despised most and yet understood her? They were quiet for a while. Chris looked up at Jude and broke the ice.

Chris: "It wasn't his fault."
Jude looked up at her. Tommy was the last person she wanted to talk about. Especially to Chris and after what happened last night.
Jude: "It takes two."
Chris: "Look, I am sorry for what happened. I really am but I can't help the way I feel."
Jude: "Christina I don't blame you for the way you FEEL. I blame you for doing something about it. You KNEW he was engaged. Not that he is not at fault here. "
Chris: "It's Chris." she spat back.
Jude: "I said what I said, Christina."
Again, there was silence. And again Chris was the one to break the ice.

Chris: "I know you left him because of the kiss, if you love him so much why can't you forgive him for one stupid mistake?"
Jude: "You don't know ANYTHING. You don't how I feel, you don't know how Tommy feels, and you don't know what the hell is going on so don't sit there and patronize me. Your 'stupid mistake' screwed up my life. I lost something I can never get back." she yelled. Who did this girl think she is? She didn't know anything about Jude. She didn't know Jude lost her first child because of this 'stupid mistake'.
Chris: "I do know something. I do know Tommy loves you. And I know you still love him." Jude looked at her. After everything she just said to her how could she be so calm?
Jude: "What are you trying to do? Get us back together? I thought you wanted him."
Chris smiled: "Huh, I did. Trust me. But he only loves you. I see that now."
Jude: "Its too late for me and him."

Jude heard some voices and jumped to her feet. She banged on the door once more. The door flung open. It was Kwest.
Kwest: "What are you doing in here?" he asked surprised and than saw Chris "with her?"
Jude: "Long story short, we got locked up together."
Kwest smiled: "And you're both still alive?" he joked. Jude smiled and punched him. Chris walked out of the basement without a word and went back to her studio.
Jude: "Funny Kwest. Where were you yesterday? You didn't come to the wedding."
Kwest: "Oh yeah. Amy wasn't feeling so good so we just stayed home. I heard it was quiet a night."
Jude: "Don't even get me started."
Kwest: "What happened to Tommy? He is not here and he didn't call in."
Jude rolled her eyes again: "He's probably still sleeping."
Kwest's eye brows rose. Jude saw this and quickly went on.
Jude: "Not what you think. He got into a fight last night at a bar, after getting drunk, got arrested, and I had to bail him out. So he won't be up for a while."
Kwest: "Tommy? We are talking about the same guy here?"
Jude smiled: "I think so."
Kwest: "Wow, he really is screwed up."
Jude: "Tell me about it. Listen, I have to go now but I'll see you around."
Kwest: "Ok."

Jude hugged Kwest, picked up her box and walked to her car. She knew now what to do and she was determined to do it right.

Jude made her way to the bank. Once there she took care of business and then drove off to the travel agency where Ivette worked.

Ivette: "Jude, this is a surprise. What can I do for you?"
Jude smiled and sat down: "I want to go on a vacation."
Ivette: "Ok, what did you have in mind?"
Jude: "I don't know. Somewhere private where no paparazzi will follow me."
Ivette nodded: "Just for you or….."
Jude: "Yes, me alone."
Ivette turned to her computer and typed some things in "Ok the best deal would be Hawaii, in the States. They have these cottages right on the beach. How does that sound?"
Jude smiled: "Perfect, book it."
Ivette again typed in some things "Ok, its yours. Did you need anything else?"
Jude thought for a minute: "Oh yeah, a rental car."
Ivette: "Ok." she again turned to the computer. "All set. You're leaving in 2 days and coming back in 2 weeks."
Jude: "Great"
Ivette handed Jude the airplane ticket and Jude paid with her credit card.
Ivette: "Your dad didn't tell me you were planning on going anywhere so soon."
Jude: "Yeah, I just decided that I need some time for myself. Away from the chaos."
Ivette: "Good for you."

A couple of minutes later Jude left. She went over to Sadie's and Jason's and spend the rest of the day barbequing with them. Later on Stuart, Ivette, Georgia, Andy, Victoria and Nick joined them. The day was full of laughter. Jude missed spending time with her family. Things, a couple of years ago, were so different. Back than it was just Jude, Sadie, mom and dad. Now it was Victoria and Andy, Stuart and Ivette, Sadie, Jason and Adriana. Everyone sort of branched out and made new families while Jude was left behind.

They were all out in the back yard eating and enjoying each others company.
Sadie: "Uh I am so jealous. You're going on vacation." everyone laughed.
Jude: "I promise, next time I'll take you with me."
Sadie: "You better. I'll hold you to that promise." again they all laughed in union.

The night progressed and pretty soon it was dark and late. Everyone went they're separate ways. Jude went home with Victoria and Nick. She took a quick shower and began packing. Then she went to bed. The next day she woke up and packed some more. It was pretty quiet. Nick and Victoria had both left to work. Jude made herself some breakfast and ate alone. Than she got dressed and cleaned the house a little. She vacuumed and washed the dishes so her mom wouldn't have to when she came home, tired from work. Around 4:30 PM Jude decided to go out and get some fresh air.

Once again she was pulled to the beach. And once again she sat in the same spot. Her and Tommy's spot. No one ever came there. It was hidden between two huge rocks. She lowered herself on the sand and looked out at the ocean feeling the light breeze on her face.

Person: "So you're leaving again?" Jude looked up to find Tommy walking towards her.
Jude: "Only for 2 weeks." she said not surprised to see him. He sat down next to her. They both looked out at the ocean. Wordless.
Jude: "How did you find me?" she finally asked.
Tommy: "I know you've had a lot to think about, this is our spot. You always come here when you want to get away."
Jude nodded. He knew her better than anyone. Better than she sometimes knew herself.
Tommy: "Were you going to tell me that you're leaving?"
Jude: "Would it matter?"
Tommy: "It would to me."
Jude: "I have to do this. I have to figure things out." she said in a barely audible voice.
Tommy: "You mean you have to figure out if you can give me another chance?" she finally turned to face him. His eyes were full of pain. She knew she caused it. His voice was barely a whisper.
Jude: "That too." she turned back to the ocean.
Tommy nodded: "What if I came with you? Just you and me away from everyone else." Jude could hear the excitement in his voice rising.
Jude: "No. I have to do this alone." she stated before he got his hopes up.
Tommy: "I don't want you to do this alone. You shouldn't have to."
Jude: "Tommy, for as long as I can remember I've always depended on someone. First my parents and then you. When I saw those pictures my world crashed around me. For the first time in my life, I was alone and I didn't know how to deal with things. I have to learn to stand on my own. Without my parents…………………..and without you." she added knowing it would just add to the pain he already felt.
Tommy: "That's funny cuz for as long as I've known you, you've been the most independent person I know." he turned to her. She was surprised to hear this. He looked at her.

She was beautiful. Her hair was flying in the air from the wind. The waves crashed before them. He reached for her hand and took it in his. She didn't turn to him. She didn't fight him off. She instead returned the gesture. No one said a word. It was a silent statement. Both knew that no matter what, they always cared for each other. Together they sat there watching the waves for hours, in silence. They had known each other better than anyone ever would. They had these feeling for one another that neither could deny. It wouldn't have mattered if the world was falling apart bit by bit as long as they were together. And yet, they're world was crashing and that's exactly what they weren't. Together.

They loved each other but it was that same love that scared Tommy. That same feeling that caused him to kiss Chris. That same warmth that could have ruined his chances with Jude forever. Would she ever forgive him? Could she? He didn't even know the whole story.

Jude held on to his hand. She wanted to remember this moment forever. It might be they're last. She didn't know how things would turn out in the end. All she knew was that she loved this man more than anything in the world but all she thought about when she was with him was Dr. Cullman telling her about the miscarriage. How would she ever get over something like that? Could she? Only time would tell.

The next day Jude picked up her suitcases and carried them to Nick's car. He placed them in the trunk and they hopped in. He was taking her to the airport.
Jude: "Nick, can we stop at G Major for a minute? I have to give Georgia something."
Nick: "Sure." they drove in silence. Jude took in everything around her. The buildings, the playgrounds, the people walking. When they arrived at G Major Jude hopped out of the car while Nick waited for her in the parking lot.

Jude knocked on Georgia's door and entered.
Georgia: "Hey honey, shouldn't you be on your way to the States?"
Jude: "I am but I need to ask you for a favor first."
Georgia: "Ok, shoot."
Jude walked over to Georgia and took out a big, yellow envelope labeled "Tommy Q". She handed it to Georgia. The woman looked at her puzzled.
Jude: "I need you to give that to Tommy in a week."
Georgia: "Why can't you give it to him?"
Jude: "Please Georgia. Not today, not tomorrow but a week from today."
Georgia was still confused but agreed. The two woman hugged and Jude left.

7 hours later Jude arrived at her cottage. She settled in, washed the rental car and enjoyed her alone time. She cooked for herself and ate alone on the beach. The cottage was a few hundred feet from the water. No one was around. It was private property.

Same Time At G Major

Georgia was looking through some papers when she hit something hard underneath. She dug under the stack of sheets and finally reached the bottom. It was Jude's CD. The one she had given her when she told her she was leaving G Major. Georgia had completely forgotten about it. She got up and put it in the CD player. Jude's voice filled the air. The comforting voice Georgia had come to love. She sat down and listened to the two tracks. She was amazed at the lyrics and at the work Shay had done on the music. It was some of Jude's best work. Georgia pressed her buzzer and in walked her secretary.
Georgia: "Can you please get Kwest for me?"
Her secretary nodded and went in search of Kwest. Over 5 minutes later he entered Georgia's office.
Kwest: "What's up G?"
Georgia handed Kwest the CD: "I want you to run this down to 89.45 Canada Live, radio station."
Kwest: "What is it?"
Georgia: "It's another hit. Tell them to play the first track."
Before Kwest could ask any more questions she rushed him out of her office.

Back To Jude

Jude had been in Paradise for 2 days already. Time seemed to stand still here. No one knew where she was. Her family knew that she was in Hawaii but not where. It was a beautiful day and she was getting ready to go out for a walk when someone knocked on her door. Jude confused walked over to open it. She froze in shock. Out of all the people she had expected to come and find her she would have never imagined this person standing in front of her would.

Jude: "Elizabeth? What are you doing here?" she asked surprised to see the woman at her door step.
Elizabeth: "I came to find you. Can I come in?"
Jude stepped out of the way: "Yeah, of course." Elizabeth walked in and Jude closed the door behind the woman. Elizabeth turned to face Jude, gave her a loving and quick hug before making her way further inside the cottage.
Jude: "How did you find me?"
Elizabeth: "Jude I am a woman. We have our ways." she winked and Jude smiled. She was the most independent woman Jude knew but than again, who wouldn't be after everything she had lived through?
Elizabeth: "I know you are confused as to why I am here. I won't beat around the bush, my son is an idiot and he messed things."

They walked over to the little kitchen table and sat down. Jude took in her words. She didn't know how to respond. Elizabeth saw this and continued before Jude could say anything.
Elizabeth: "I know I am the last person you want advice from but I had to talk to you. It hurts me to see Tommy hurting. After all, he is still my son and I love him. I know he hurt you and he caused you a lot of pain. He has been through a lot in his life and I know it doesn't justify what he has done but I have never seen him the way he is when he is with you. You make him happy."
Jude: "Elizabeth I understand that you came here thinking I would forgive and forget but its not that easy. He couldn't have been so happy with me or he wouldn't have done what he did."

Elizabeth placed her hand over Jude's in understanding and continued, in her motherly and compassionate voice: "I know its not easy. I understand that. Don't think Tommy send me here, he doesn't know anything about this. Jude, I have learned to love you like a daughter. There was a time when I doubted Tommy would find the right woman for him, living the life style he was but than I met you. You make my son a better person, weather you believe it or not. I knew Tommy before you stepped in his life and he has never been happier than he is when your name comes up in a conversation. All I am asking of you is to think things over. Can you promise me that?"
Jude: "I promise." she said agreeing to the woman's only wish. It couldn't hurt to think things through. That's all she had been thinking about anyways.
Elizabeth: "Jude, I know you may think that maybe you are better off without him. And maybe you are but I know you still love him. No matter what you do, don't EVER turn your back on love. Its the rarest and most precious thing in the world. I know you need him just as much as he needs you."
Elizabeth got up and made her way to the door. Jude walked behind her. Elizabeth now reaching the door, turned around, hugged Jude warmly and said her goodbye. Jude was still in shock of what had just occurred. Elizabeth was the last person Jude had thought of when her door had knocked.


Back In Canada

Kwest did as he was told and dropped the CD off at the radio station. Tommy got in his Viper on his way to work. Jude had been gone three days now and things were different. He missed her. He had this emptiness inside that she only had the power of filling. He hadn't heard from her since she left. No one had. Kwest had told him one of her new songs would soon be published but no one except Georgia had heard it yet. He was driving when his cell rang. He picked it up.

Tommy: "Hello?"
Kwest: "Hey man. Where are you?"
Tommy: "In my car. Why?"
Kwest: "Put on your radio to Canada Live."
Tommy: "What's going on?"
Kwest: "Tommy, just do it. Hurry up."
Tommy did just that.
Kwest: "Call me afterwards."
Before Tommy could ask what was going on again Kwest had hung up and the DJ on the radio had gotten his attention.
DJ: "…..her new single. Now this girl went from being a normal 15 year old student trying to deal with high school life to being a mega idol in the music biz. Every guy wants to date her and every girl wants to be her. Jude Harrison is living the dream. From touring to recording platinum albums and everything in-between, she's got it. The talent, the voice, the look, the heart, and not to mention hot producers. First Tommy Q and now Shay. This track, again, was produced by Shay, do we see a pattern forming here? Here we go Jude Harrison with 'My Baby'."

Tommy turned the volume up. He knew a song was coming out but he had no idea it would be this soon. He hadn't even heard it yet. He thought about how much he missed her. The car filled with a slow guitar solo, Jude's voice send chills down his spine.……….

"I felt you inside and it felt so real,
You made me a better person, you let me heal.
I thought I had it all together until it all fell apart,
Baby, I couldn't hold on to you with my broken heart.
Thought you'd be the beginning of something true and good,
Already loved you so much, maybe more than I should.

Oooooooooo

The beat picked up.

Baby, it's you that keeps me awake,
Awful nights of horror I can't seem to shake.
Nightmares haunt me of the night I lost you, (you, youuuuuuuuu)
I didn't know how to handle it, it was all so new.
I screwed up, I made a mistake,
Nightmares follow me but my life seems fake. (It's all so fake)

Now the beat slowed down again……

You were my first, you were my all,
Can't seem to let you go, no one's there to catch me as I fall. (I keep falling)
Tried too hard to hold on to a memory that I should have let go,
I was too naïve, I just didn't know. (How could I know?)
I wanted nothing more than to hold you in my arms,
Baby, I wanted to protect you from all the world's harms.

The beat picked up……..

Baby, it's you that keeps me awake,
Awful nights of horror I can't seem to shake.
Nightmares haunt me of the night I lost you,
I didn't know how to handle it, it was all so new.
I screwed up, I made a mistake,
Nightmares follow me but my life seems fake.

Tried to hold on to you but you wanted to go,
You were stronger than me, now I know.
Screams, cries I still hear them clear,
I wish for nothing more than for you to be near.
For a while darkness took over but you pulled me back,
I wanted to give you what I seem to lack.

You were my first, made of my skin,
You brought me back from where I've been. (Oooo)
A hell of my own I was so depressed,
You gave me a chance to clean up this mess.
You were my hope, you shone through,
The tunnel of darkness that surrounded me and you. (oooooooo my baby)."

The music stopped. Tommy turned the radio off. He didn't want to hear any more comments from people that didn't know anything about him or Jude. His attention was all on the song. This was so different than the rest of Jude's music. It was an amazing song but it didn't make any sense. Who was she singing about? He knew Jude, all her songs had a purpose. What was this ones? He could feel her pain. Her voice said it all. He knew when she was hurting and he could tell she was hurting like hell when she sung this. She had put her all in this song. Her voice had only gotten better. Everyone who knew even a little about music knew that this girl was it. She was simply born to be a star.

A few red lights later Tommy arrived at G Major and went to the studio where Kwest was sitting.
Tommy: "Hey man." he said and took a seat next to Kwest.
Kwest: "You heard it?"
Tommy nodded and exhaled deeply.
Kwest: "Any idea what that was about?"
Tommy: "None. I can't think of anything. I mean Jude always sings about something personal. This was Just so………………..different."
Kwest: "Different but a hit. Man that song was one of the best she ever did. Her vocals send chills down my spine."
Tommy: "I know. Her voice really came through the lyrics. She sang it with her heart." he recalled.
Kwest: "So what are we talking about here? You think Shay wrote that song and she just sang it?"
Tommy: "Nah man, you know Jude would never do that. Besides, she couldn't have sung it with such force if she hadn't felt it. It has to be something personal, something she went through."
Kwest: "Well I have a feeling that Mark Cullman knows what this is about."
Tommy's head shot up in bewilderment.
Tommy: "Mark Cullman? What do you mean? What does he have to do with any of this?" he asked interested but confused.
Kwest: "He released a statement this morning saying he had some information on Jude that he believes the public has a right to know."
Tommy: "The public has a right to know?"
Kwest: "His exact words."
Tommy: "What information?"
Kwest: "He didn't say. All he said was that it would be in 'Daily News' soon."

They stayed quiet ran his hands through his hair in frustration. He hated being left out in the dark. He hated not knowing.
Tommy: "Do you think there is any truth to that?" he finally asked not really looking for an answer.
Kwest: "I don't know. I mean why would this guy go public with something like this if he didn't have anything to back it up?"
Tommy: "Attention!"
Kwest: "Maybe, but I think that we should find out who this guy is before he ruins Jude's career."
Tommy looked worried now. There was a question ringing in his head and he just had to know the answer to.
Tommy: "Kwest, you think Jude had something on tour?"
Kwest: "You mean with another man? A relationship?"
Tommy's voiced echoed pain: "Yeah, with this Cullman guy. I mean, did you hear the lyrics? 'A hell of my own I was so depressed, You gave me a chance to clean up this mess'. That had to be about someone helping her through a rough time." he said looking at the wall of pictures. More importantly, the picture of him and Jude, together. It hurt him to think that Jude might have given herself to someone else while she was away. Kwest stayed quiet for a little bit. He saw this question pained Tommy but he had to be honest with his best friend.

Kwest: "I don't know man. Maybe! She was pretty mad when she found out about you and Chris. This Cullman might have been there for her. She needed someone to turn to."
Tommy: "So she might have had something with this Mark Cullman?" he asked like he was just beginning to understand when in truth he believed that Jude had moved on with Mark. It hurt too much to admit it.
Kwest: "Maybe, nothing is for sure but right now it's all we have to go on."
Tommy got up: "I guess the only way we'll know for sure is if we find out." he said deep in thought. He'd be damned if he would let some guy dirty Jude's name and ruin her career. Kwest took out his cell and made a phone call.
Tommy: "What was that about?"
Kwest: "I know this guy, he owes me a favor. He'll find out who Mark Cullman is."

Kwest got up and placed his right hand on Tommy's shoulder in support. The two men talked a while more and mixed some music to get they're minds off the topic. Neither really concentrated on the job at hand. Both men were too busy thinking about Jude. Tommy was in love with her and Kwest loved her like a sister. Neither wanted to see her hurt anymore. Around four hours later Kwest's cell phone rang. He picked up. The conversation was pretty much one-sided. All Kwest was saying was "Uh huh.", "Ok.", "Really?" This went on for about 10 minutes. Tommy was pacing up and down the little studio waiting for Kwest to get off the phone and share the information. Kwest finally got off the phone and Tommy ran to sit down across from him.

Tommy: "And?" he asked eyes wide open.
Kwest: "Mark Cullman lives in New York. He is 48. Somehow I doubt Jude would go for a guy that old. He is a well respected doctor. Other than a few speeding tickets his record is clean." he said and shut his eyes as if they pained him for a split second.
Tommy: "New York? How would Jude know him?"
Kwest thought about this for a couple of minutes until it dawned on him: "Remember she did that promotion for the duet album in New York. Maybe she met him there."
Tommy jumped to his feet: "Jude was sick when she was in New York. I remember telling her to go and see a doctor."
Kwest's eyebrows shot up: "So what could he possibly have on her? Is she sick or something? She would have told us if she was, right?"

Tommy and Kwest were both quiet. The thought of Jude being seriously ill was not one either wanted to have. Fear crept up Tommy's spine. He had to talk to Jude as soon as she came home. About everything. Mark Cullman. Chris. EVERYTHING.

Back To Jude

The next day Jude jumped in her car and made her way to the grocery store. Since she was staying in a cottage she didn't have room service. Once in the car she turned up the volume on the radio. Some new song played. The top was down, her hair flying in the breeze. She was driving behind a huge truck as she approached a bridge. Every minute or so, Jude's eyes would wander to the ocean beneath her. It sparkled in the sun.

When she turned to the road again the truck had come to a stop but her car was going too fast to stop in time. Jude turned the wheel and lost control of her car. It accelerated with full speed. The vehicle's driver's side hit the piped fence of the bridge with full force, knocking Jude unconscious. The car hung in air midway. A few pipes from the fence fell off and dropped into the blue ocean below, followed by the driver's door. The traffic came to a complete stop. No one saw the car's door and fence dropping in the ocean. All they could see was the passenger's side of the vehicle.

People ran out of they're cars to see the accident. Jude's car was completely totaled. Smoke filled the air as it escaped the hood of the car. A couple of men began running towards the car and rescue whoever was still inside when the car went up in flames. A small explosion followed soon there after, throwing the men back in the air. Everyone stood in shock as the car went up in flames and was catapulted in the air by the forceful explosion. A few minutes later rescue teams, ambulances and the media had completely blocked the bridge. No one knew, at a tender age of 20, rock star Jude Harrison was no more.