"She's really gone." Olivia whispered to Gregory as he tucked her into bed. "How can she be gone?"

He wasn't sure what do say. He sat down next to her, quiet for a moment as he tried to decide what he should do. What a husband was supposed to do. Gregory touched her shoulder, relieved when she reached for his hand.

"She's just a baby." Olivia clung to his hand. Finding it hard to watch the tears stream down her face, Gregory got into bed with her, wrapping his arms around her and trying to get to remember lying in his bed before. For a moment he remembered the taste of sweat on his lips as he kissed his way up her neck.

That sent a rush of heat up his spine that he definitely remembered. "I love you." Gregory replied finally, trusting it as the one thing he couldn't mess up.

"I almost lost you." She rolled awkwardly in the bed, resting her head against his. "I couldn't live without-"

Gregory couldn't bring himself to think about the daughter he didn't remember, or the terror of his own mortality. He would rather think about the baby that kicked against his hand. "You won't." He didn't know her but he was stricken with the urge to keep her from crying. "I'll be here. With you and the baby, as long as it takes."

Her kiss surprised him. The quiet, desperate need in it was unexpected. Olivia felt his hesitation and assumed he was thinking about Caitlin. "It wasn't your fault."

"Oh I know." His nonchalance worried her until she realized he was distracted. His fingers fanned out over her belly. "Caitlin got involved with the wrong man, got in too deep." What else had Roger told him to say? Gregory felt her leg run up over his calf. "I'd kill Cole again in a moment. In a heartbeat-"

Every second of Cole's death was as fresh in his mind as if it had happened just yesterday. The water had been cold when Cole stopped moving. Quiet when he finally choked and went still. He'd killed for her. He loved her enough to destroy another life to protect her. What kind of person was he? How could she look at him like he was her savior? When he remembered that longing to feel Cole's heart stop beating. That demonic fire within was terrifying in his memory. Terrifying but powerful, even enticing. He had that kind of power within him.

"I need you to be safe." Gregory explained as her hand cupped his face. "I can't let anyone hurt you. Anyone. I love you so much-"

Her tears were wet as brushed against his face with her cheek. "But you blame yourself, don't you? That's why you haven't said anything, why you haven't mentioned her name since it happened." Her memories were so upsetting, even in hindsight, that the color drained out of her face. She sat up against the headboard, looking over to the place on the carpet where she'd seen him struggle for life.

"I go through it in my mind, over and over. Caitlin loved you." She loved you. She used to wait at the doorway an hour before you came home. She'd sneak out of her bed to see you come home from business trips-" Olivia's voice cracked, leading the collapse of her internal reserve.

Gregory wished Roger and Bette had decided to stay. For an insane moment he almost wished he had stayed in the hospital because he was vastly unprepared to handle being alone with his wife. He loved her, he reminded himself as he reached into the top drawer for his handkerchief. He loved her enough to marry her and have two children. He loved her enough to stay with her for twenty years of fighting, of arguing and screaming at each other. He loved but he didn't remember why.

He didn't even remember fighting with her. Gregory was barely even sure what kissing her was like and she was carrying his baby. A baby, he'd lied and taken advantage of her to get. When he gave her the handkerchief, his hand went immediately to her belly. The baby wouldn't know that he didn't have any memories. The baby was a clean slate. The one person he could love without worrying that he'd let them down.

"It's going to be all right." He promised her, but Olivia believed him more than he did. How could he promise not to hurt her when he didn't even know what she wanted? What she dreamed about was as alien as how she took her coffee. Gregory wondered if he should tell her the truth, confess his fears and throw everything out into the open.

Olivia surprised him by kissing his cheek. She was so sweet and so very beautiful. She deserved to be remembered with every fiber of his being. "I know it's selfish of me. I should be thinking about Caitlin-" She sighed, guilt was heavy in her chest. "But it all comes back to you." Her hands went around his neck and he felt her pull him down towards the bed. "I need you so much right now. I think about Caitlin and it feels like my heart's stopped beating."

She shuddered as if she could feel the chill hand of death. "But I can't even think about losing you. My mind freezes up and the whole world stops around me."

He didn't realize he was crying. He'd been too distracted to feel the burning in his eyes that preceded the escaping tear from his left eye. "I'm here now." How could she depend on him so much? How could he be so important to anyone? Why didn't he just lead a normal life?

Gregory let her get comfortable before he lay down next to her. He knew he should be trying to remember Caitlin or what had happened to him but everything was a distraction. Had he picked up these sheets? Where had they found their headboard? He'd have to ask her someday, under better circumstances.

For right now, he enjoyed resting his arm around her chest. The way she held his hand made he feel necessary. As if he was so much more than just a creature of flesh and blood that shared her bed. He liked that too. "Olivia?" He wondered if she was asleep.

"Yes?" She murmured and snuggled a little closer. The sheets slid easily over her nightgown.

"I need your help, since you're not asleep."

Olivia half turned her head back towards him. "Do I have to get up?"

Gregory chuckled, relieved that she was admitting she was tired. "No. You don't even have to move."

"Then I'm all yours."

Pulling himself higher on his pillow, Gregory listened to the ocean outside his window as he tried to organize his thoughts. "I'm having some trouble with my memory."

"Trouble?" Olivia yawned, too tired to concerned. "Roger said you didn't remember what happened. Is there more than that?"

She rolled over to look at his face and Gregory forced himself to smile. Would be it be easier to confess everything now? He stroked her cheek and smiled again when it felt familiar. "A lot of things are a bit foggy. Nothing important. I just could use a little help jogging my memory."

She kissed him again as guilt ran cold into his stomach. "What do you want to remember?"

"Why'd we decide to have another baby? Were we worried about having an empty nest now that Sean's in college?" He thought it was an innocent enough question. The kind of little thing that might open the door for a host of other memories, but her face suggested something else entirely.

Olivia couldn't believe what he was asking. It was his idea to have another baby. He'd taken the initiative, he'd decided he wanted her back in his heart. Just like every other move in their marriage, their finding each other again was all his doing. "You decided darling. Your father was dying, and you were worried about not having anyone to pass on your legacy. Caitlin and Sean didn't want to get into business."

"Oh." It seemed simple enough. The thought of his father made anger boil in his stomach. Gregory would have loved to put him in the long list of things he couldn't remember. "Did we talk about it?"

Olivia laughed a little as she ran her fingers through his hair. "No, no, not at all. You started putting some kind of fertility drug in my food and it made me sick."

She continued to giggle as he sat up in surprise. "You're serious?" What kind of person did that to his wife?

"It seemed perfectly reasonable to you at the time." Olivia found the honest surprise at his own actions deeply amusing. "You even got mad at me when I followed your example and made myself really sick a few weeks later."

Gregory's mind brought him back to that night. Coming home exhausted, sneaking into his bedroom and kissing Alex. He wasn't supposed to kiss Alex. That was suddenly abundantly clear. No matter what he felt, he was supposed to kiss Olivia. Olivia was there at Alex's side. He took a guess. "Alex helped you."

Her precious smile told him he'd guessed correctly. Even sounded confidant enough to make her think he remembered it. "She wanted us to have a baby."

"I loved her." It slipped past his conscious mind and he tensed as he realized he'd said it out loud. Did Olivia hate Alex? Was Alex a sore spot between them?

"She loved you too." Olivia sighed and turned away from him. Not because she was upset, as he first feared, but because she wanted his arms back around her. "She was so good to you. Always there when you needed someone to share your troubles. When we weren't-"

Gregory couldn't remember sleeping with Alex any time in the last twenty years. He knew her from college, from law school. She must have come right before Olivia. She didn't want to get married. He remembered that fateful conversation on the beach.

"She wasn't the marrying type."

"Neither were you." Olivia's elbow hit his stomach playfully. "You were the most famous playboy of your year at Stanford law or are you going to pretend you don't remember being the center of all those batting eyelashes?"

Gregory sighed into her hair and wondered lazily if she'd let him wash it. Did they have that kind of relationship? Would she crawl into the bath with him? "Is it better for me if I do?"

"That was a long time ago and I can't argue with how handsome they found you."

He ran his hand over her belly, realizing he must have been madly smitten with her once to pick her over all the other women. "You were special."

"I was too shy to leave you. Too naive to be anything but completely enamored with you." She sounded like she was joking, but he read through it.

"I needed you. You were-" Gregory paused and tried to think of what he needed. His ideal woman must have been her. "Everything I wasn't. Sweet, beautiful and capable of so much more feeling than I was. You were perfect."

"I was perfect?" She teased as she toyed with the fingers of his hand. "What am I now?"

"My love."