Chapter Eighteen

The Past Comes Back to Haunt Us

Kathleen sat in the shower, the hot water beating on her causing a numbness to spread through her back. She buried her face in her arms again. She had been sitting like this in the shower for maybe ten minutes, fighting the urge to claw at her own skin. Her headache was gone as was her 'drunkness' but she couldn't get the feel of the man off of her. She must have scrubbed herself raw before she gave up, sitting down.

Shaking her head, she shut off the water. No matter her own feelings she had a job to do, research to finish and she had to do it. She climbed for the shower and wrapped a towel around her. She pulled her long hair into a sloppy bun and stood in front of the mirror (the one she had cursed to be silent because she was tired of it talking to her). She bit her lip and wiped away the fog.

"Finite Incantatum." She said softly and watched as the glamour she had placed on herself disappeared.

Scars, faint and white appeared on her arms, going in all directions. A tattoo appeared on her ankle and a thick scar that extended from her middle thy to her stomach were now revealed. Her hair both lightened and darkened at the same time, turning its natural shade of brown that had gold and red highlights in it. Her face was now more round than before and it had scattered freckles across her cheeks and nose.

She sat down on the toilet with a sigh and extended her leg to rub lotion on it. She stopped when she reached the tattoo. She traced it lightly with her finger tips, tears in her eyes. The tattoo matched the one that Richard had had on his ankle: an onyx cross with a lion and snake mingling in the middle, the snake's eyes glowing a deep red. A tear trickled down her cheek as she thought back when she and Richard had gotten the tattoos, they were spelled to tell the other when the other was in grave danger. Back when Richard was alive the lion's eyes glowed a rich green.

Shaking her head, Kathleen rubbed lotion on her other leg. As she shut the container of lotion she caught sight of her most embarrassing scars. They were neither thick nor thin, merely there along the vein in each of her wrists reminding her of the fateful night that she had tried to kill herself after Richard's funeral, a day after Jack Hunter had arrived at the Paladins training grounds. She sneered at the thought of him, standing up and half stomping into her room.

She had gone into Richard's room, mostly in shock. She had been packing his things up when something set her off, causing her to have…well a temper-tantrum, throwing things around the room. One of Richard's books had hit the large picture frame next to his bookcases, the one of them, shattering the glass onto the floor. Numbly she had gone over there and sat down with more of a thump than anything else. She had found one of the sharpest pieces of the glass and stared at it for probably a half hour before she decided what she wanted to do. She had shoved her sleeves up and stared at her wrist before bringing the glass down on her wrists, slicing each vein.

Kathleen threw open her closet door, the door slamming into the wall as she fought to get out of the memory that was haunting her at the moment.

There, she had thought. All I have to do is wait and no one will ever be bugged by me again and I'll see Richard. She had sat there with her eyes closed and she was well on her way to dying when someone started knocking on the door. She felt hatred burn in her, why couldn't the world leave her alone to die in peace? It was nearly a minute before the person merely opened the door and she had heard a gasp, someone saying her name, and then someone sending out for help. Whispering at her to hold on and holding her hand until she blacked out. When she woke up she was face to face with her worst enemy and ironically the person who had 'kept her alive'. Jack Hunter.

She let out a low growl, forcing the memory back. She didn't want to think about it. She had run from that life and she refused to go back, not even in thought. She had left America to get away from Hunter there was no way she'd let him follow her here, not if she had a say in it.

"The job, think about the job." She muttered staring at her closet.

She grinned. She was feeling in a particularly dark mood so she would dress like that. She quickly put the glamour back on and pulled out her favorite shirt. It was a black shirt, pitch black, with sleeves that looked torn off and fishnet sleeves underneath the original fabric. It had Something Wicked This Way Comes writing across it in dripping red letters with a shadowed, bloody dagger beneath the words. Smirking she took her black skirt, the short one that ended above her knee and rode up her thy slightly.

She needed to go into Knockturn Alley so she might as well turn heads when she does. She pulled black fishnets on with her black combat boots. She yanked her black trench coat on and dried her hair quickly with a drying spell. She brushed it out before pulling it up into a wispy bun with several strands for hair falling lightly on her shoulders in curls. She smiled before lining her eye with black eyeliner and added a dash of color to her lips before putting her watch on and about a dozen silver bracelets on her other wrist. She tied the ribbon that held Richard's Paladin ring around her neck before sliding her own ring on her finger. She had to do some hands on research and make a name for the 'new girl'. She slid her wand into her wand holster and stalked down the stairs.

"Kath—Kathleen?" a startled voice said behind her. She glanced back and saw Harry standing on the stairs, awkwardly balancing several books, staring at her. She levitated the books and he smiled his thanks to her. "You…you look…different." He said staring at her.

"Bad different or good different?" she asked with a smirk as they walked down the stairs side by side.

"I can't decide." He said honestly. She giggled. "Going somewhere?"

"Yeah. I need to do some more research on my new job out in Knockturn Alley." He looked at her startled. She smirked at him. "Don't worry Harry, I can take care of myself."

"I know." He said as they started down the last staircase. "Are you all right? You seem…well…angry."

She blocked the pain that hit her chest when he asked about her. It had been a long time since anyone really cared. She rolled her eyes. "One thing you should learn about me Wonder Boy," She turned towards the library. "I'm always pissed off and angry. You just happen to be on my good side and don't see it all that often."

Harry stared at her before taking his books. "Thanks for the help, Kathleen."

She nodded as he disappeared into the kitchen. She turned towards the library again. She had to tell 'one of the adults' that she was going out. She found horrible annoying and degrading having to tell an adult as if she was child where she was going. She heard voice from the library and slipped in quietly. She saw Severus Snape sitting in an armchair with Lupin, Mr. Weasley, Tonks, and Mundungus Fletcher (though he was asleep—or knocked out, mused Kathleen spotting a bottle of alcohol in the wizard's hands) sitting around the room, obviously waiting for someone and apparently arguing about something.

"Sirius was trying to protect Harry!" Tonks argued.

"He gave Potter unneeded freedoms giving that child the delusion that he could do whatever he please,"

"Harry is no more a child than Kate is," Hatred coursed through her, of course Lupin would be the only one in the Order to call her by Kate, not to annoy her but because that was how they had first meet, a long time ago.

"She is just as much of a child." She bit back her curses as Severus continued. "She got drunk last night and was attacked by a Muggle who nearly raped her." Lupin and Tonks' faces went white as Kathleen bottled her anger. "How is that not childish?"

"Is she all right? Was she actually violated?" Lupin's worry brought back memories to Kathleen of when she first met him in the States, when he came to help with the 'werewolf experiment', they had become friends as she tested different potions on him but their fall-out was due to an attack on the training ground that nearly got him killed. He had said goodbye to her and Richard in a haste and left, claiming he had to go back to England for a more important reason (which evidently turned out to be him teaching at Hogwarts).

"No." Snape sneered.

"Don't tell Molly, she'll panic." Warned Mr. Weasley shaking his head.

Kathleen fought back a snort as Snape's upper lip curled in distaste but said nothing. Tonks shook her head, the pink hair catching the fire's light. "I don't like her. She's head strong and too sure of herself."

"Are you sure that's not just a block she build up to protect herself?" Lupin said standing up and walking dangerously close to the shadows Kathleen hid in. "She's scared of getting close to anyone because she might put them in a position of getting killed."

She bit her lip hard at this, don't speak of things you don't know, Remus! Her thoughts shouted. But even as she thought this deep in her subconscious she knew it was true.

"Did you see the look on her face when we first were talking with her and you confronted her with that Job," Mr. Weasley said to Snape. "That guilt and blame, it reminded me of how Harry looked after Sirius died."

"If the fool boy had just thought about it rather than gallivanting off to play hero then Black wouldn't have died." Pointed out Snape in an evil voice.

"How could he have been sure that what he saw wasn't fact?"

"Black, though a fool he my have been, would never have survived long enough for Potter to see anything but Black dead, the Dark Lord would have tortured him long enough for insanity to reach and then killed him and he would never have done it without the entire Death-Eater audience."

"Harry didn't think he had anyone he could trust," Lupin argued.

"According to Ron they all thought that all the members of the Order were gone until you came in and none of them thought you would help at all." Mr. Weasley said firmly.

"I wonder why," muttered Tonks.

"Potter was a fool if he considered he could beat the Dark Lord and free Black with a band of fourth and fifth years." Snape shook his head. "Though with Black treating Potter as if he were," Severus faltered. "As if he were James." The hatred in his voice and eyes was clear to everyone. "It is no wonder he's always running off, breaking the rules, and trying to save everyone by himself."

Unable to stand in silence any longer she spoke, her voice ringing out startling the people in the room. "So?" She walked forward slowly and determinedly. She narrowed her brown eyes at him, still raw from crying. "So what if that was how Sirius Black treated Wonder Boy? Harry isn't a child."

"Nor is he a man," sneered the Potions teacher, not surprised at all to see her unlike the others.

She leaned against the wall amused. "Kate, how long have you been there?" Lupin asked.

She didn't answer him, her eyes never moving from the hook-nosed professor. "Or James, right?" she asked, her arms crossed in front of her chest.

Something flickered in his eyes. "Exactly, Black treated him like James."

She arched her brow, the others in the room knowing from experience just to keep quiet. "You never gave him much of a reason not to." She started to circle him like he was her prey, which in a way he was, she still was mad at him for taking her wand the previous night.

"What?" he fought to keep his anger in check, he knew that there was no need to have a wizard duel in the middle of the library of Grimswald Palace.

"You treat Harry like James. Like Harry was the one who put you through all your pain,"

His lip curled up in distaste. "He is a child."

"No," she spoke firmly as he faced her. "He's a young man forced to endure pain and death no one his age should. No one any age should."

"Black gave him too much freedom," Snape fought back. "Black thought his childhood buddy lived on in Potter and treated him as such."

"And you punish him for what his father did to you, not bothering to look and see he's not James. Harry is not the boy who put you through hell." She shook her head. "But you're blind to it. You're blind to the truth, Severus Snape."

His eyes flared up, almost as if she threw a lit match into a tub of gasoline. She didn't back down, her level gaze showing reason beyond her years. He held the gaze for a moment, ire burning like an untamed fire. "I will not take such impudence from a child!" he snapped.

Now it was her time to get mad, no one calls her child and gets away with it. "Child," she seethed, taking a sharp breath in.

Her emotions were already raw and on the edge and he just gave them a huge shove. Immediately every member in the room was thrown back into the wall. Mundungas snorting awake and finding himself unable to move from the wall he was pinned against. Snape was pinned higher on the wall so his feet were barely scraping the ground. She walked towards him as everything from spectacles to the glasses for water shattered. She was pissed, livid, incensed, enraged and the only thing she wanted to do was teach the slimy grease ball a lesson.

"I am no child," she whispered for all to hear. He looked up at her, unable to fight her. Know this, Severus Snape. She let the words trickle across the hollow plains of his tortured mind, breaking the defenses he had on them as easily as it was to break a pencil. Do not think me too 'noble' to use the Crucious Curse. I am held by no boundaries of morals or cares. I, but refrain because of my respect to the man you serve in truth.

She could feel his fear and enjoyed it to an extent. But in faith, She gave him a small taste of pain. She was pleased when he cried out in agony after a moment, the thoughts of the Dark Lord's Crucious Curses flooding his mind. She grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at her. "Never insult me again." She warned him as he panted, the curse's after affects still burning through him.

She took a step back, releasing everyone as reality crashed down around her. She had just used an Unforgivable, not that she hadn't ever used them before but she had promised Richard that she would only do it when necessary. She couldn't help but feel as if Richard would be extremely disappointed in her if he was here. She looked down as the other moved towards Severus. But he isn't here is he? Her thoughts taunted her.

"Kate?" someone touched her arm, causing her to jump slightly.

She met Lupin's worried brown eyes. Her defenses were down, she knew it immediately by the look in his eyes. She swallowed hard and looked at Snape, slipping back into her cold air. "He's not too injured." She said but there was a rawness to her voice as she repaired the broken items in the room with a flick of her hand.

"I've never seen anything like that." whispered Tonks as Snape tore from the Order members' grasps.

"It comes from refined training, use of magic outside of a polished, hollow, wooden stick." She said with a shrug. She took a deep breath in, bottling the anger. "You know that, Severus."

Severus stood up shakily. "Careful, Severus," warned Mr. Weasley as Snape started to fall.

He wrenched his arm away from the red head. His cold black eyes glared at her. She shifted her gaze to him, her eyes unblinking. He tore his wand out but instead of pointing it at her, he pointed it towards a door barred shut. It flew open causing her to turn around sharply. A boggart flew out, the black blob landed in front of her, remaining shapeless and squirming.

She laughed. "I have no fears, Severus Snape." Again, something you know due to the Paladins intense training. She let the words flow into Severus' mind causing him to sneer.

It turned to Lupin, who was closest to her. It formed a silver glowing orb. "Riddikulus." He said as the others herded it back into the closet.

"Impossible, everyone is afraid of something," gasped Tonks in shock.

"Fear makes you weak. We were trained in the Paladins to fear nothing, not even death." She said with an amused sigh, biting back comment on the silver orb. You used to be afraid of something, when Richard was alive. A voice mocked her. Besides you know that's not what they train you to do. The voice said silently. Kathleen looked at Snape. "Don't taunt me again, I don't have much patience and you are wearing what little I have very thin."

"Haven't changed much have you?" a voice said from the doorway.

She looked towards the door sharply and felt everything around her freeze. Shock registered on her face as she realized she was face to face with Jack Hunter, the one person she had run to another country to get away from and the one person now standing with an amused look on his face in the doorway. "W—what are you doing here?" she fought the screech of panic that wanted to enter her voice.

He walked forward in his calm way, the one that irritated her more than anything. "Albus had another aspect of the job that he didn't tell you about. While you're off gallivanting and infiltrating the Slytherins I'm going to be watching England's Own Hero." He said as he studied her. "He said that you might need help."

"As if," she sneered, hatred seething in her. She fought the malice that wanted to enter her voice as she thought of Huntress. "Where's your peppy red-head Saria?" Damn you still can't ask about her without insulting her can you? She cursed herself silently, despite the fact that she really wanted to know.

Any trace of a smile disappeared from his face as he glared at her. "You know very well where she is, Kate. Back at the training camp in the wheelchair you put her in."

Kathleen fought recoiling. That was the last thing she needed, another thing to feel guilty about. "I didn't curse her." She snarled.

"You left her alone in the middle of a battlefield." The statement was cold and detached but she could see the anger flashing in his blue eyes. "You set her up."

She shifted into her bitter character as she glared at him. "Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack," She said shaking her head with a haughty grin. "If I set her up you and she wouldn't have made it out of there alive, now would you?" He didn't move. She shifted her glare to the others in the room. "I'm going out, don't wait up." She said before walking out, her black trench coat flowing around her much in the way Severus Snape's robes did when he walked, with a menacing look.

Jack Hunter shook his head. "And there goes the glorious Kate, the untamable shrew." He muttered with a sigh and an apologetic look to the Order members in the room. "I'll have to apologize for her for she will never do it herself but ever since Richard died—change that, ever since her parents were murdered she's been like that, her power is now doubled so," he shrugged causally. "Do any of you happen to know where Wonder Boy ran off to? Albus told me to explain my part of the job to him,"

Lupin nodded. "He'll be in Ron or Hermione's room, up the stairs or in the kitchen, across the hall."

"Thank you," and with that he walked out the door as shouting erupted.

Tonks studied the space he had just been standing in. "I wonder if they know that they call Harry the same thing," she thought aloud, amusing everyone but Severus Snape, who merely settled for his famous sneer.