A.N.
"…This doubt is screaming in my face
in this familiar place,
sheltered and concealed
and if this night won't let me rest
don't let me second guess
what I know to be real put away
all I know for tonight and maybe I just might learn
to let it go take my security from me
and maybe finally I won't have to know everything
I am falling into grace to the unknown to where you are
and faith makes everybody scared it's the unknown,
the don't-know that keeps me hanging on
to you I got nothing left to defend
I cannot pretend that everything makes sense
but does it really matter now if I do not know how
to figure this thing out
I am against myself again trying to fit
these pieces in walking on a cloud of dust to get to you…"
Lifehouse Unknown
Chapter Nineteen: Obstinance
Consciousness. My eyes stayed closed as I brought my mind to the here and now. My tired senses were still begging for sleep, but I had to know where I was before any of that. I surveyed my surroundings as best I could without the gift of sight.
I was lying on the ground, on a bed of soft grass, fresh from rain that had fallen earlier but had quickly dried up. A blanket -- or cloak, I couldn't be sure -- was draped over me, I lay on my back, my head to one side, one arm folded across my chest. It was night. I could tell not because of the lack of light shining through my eyelids -- for I could just as easily lay in a cave or under a thick canopy -- but from the sounds, the cool air and the atmosphere. It was easy for me to pick out little details like that when I needed to; I didn't even have to think that hard.
From what I could feel, I wasn't much cleaner than when I'd lost consciousness, and my wounds were still just as prominent as before. Whoever it was certainly hadn't bothered to heal me. I felt mildly disappointed for a period of less than a second.
I wasn't in Entwood, that much was blindingly obvious. There was no way that the kind of grass below me could grow in a place as dark as that.
I could hear voices, low and male, to my left. There was a campfire also, I could easily smell the smoke, hear the crackling of wood and feel the far off heat on one side of my face. I decided to open my eyes a fraction, at least to get a good view of whom I was with. It was with great reluctance that my eyelids creaked open, revealing a number of unidentifiable shapes, my vision too blurred and obscure to make out anything.
The first thing that hit me as my sight cleared up was the harsh glare of he firelight. It reminded me of the growing migraine that I had desperately been trying to suppress. I inhaled sharply, clenching my eyes shut as a wave of pain washed over me. I cursed myself for my own stupidity. They would hear me…then why did they carry on talking? I risked another glance and found them in the same position, engrossed in conversation. To the left sat a small frame, a man, Elvish, with hair as golden as the slightly larger man next to him. On both occasions it reached a few inches below their shoulders. They were Elvish, all three of them, as much was obvious by their hair and of course their ears.
But the third…there was the oddity…
He sat to the far right, nodding occasionally to contribute to the conversation, but never talking. His light brown hair hung in large curls about a slightly rounder face than I would have expected. An elf with curly hair? This was new…
Also, his build intrigued me. He was by far the biggest person there, at least a good half foot taller than the centre figure. He seemed more built than the others, his shoulders wider, chest broader. He almost looked like a very clean human, but those ears…
His eyes, a dark ocean blue, met with mine. I didn't flinch. His pupils danced in the firelight as he looked to the centre figure and then back at me.
I heard them stop talking immediately, they knew I was awake. The middle Elf got up and silently crossed the five or so feet to where I lay, his features shadowed by the light on his back.
"Yuna?" Legolas. I should have known. My mind raced with all the things I could say back. What was he doing? He had no right to take me away from my home like that. It angered me, but I subdued my rage for long enough to suitably repress my headache.
"Where am I?" I asked tiredly, squinting to make out his face.
"We are just south of the forest of Lothlorien." Already? How long was I out? Why did they take me with them? What was going on? I was about to ask at least one of the questions on my lips when he spoke again. "Are you feeling at all better?"
"I'm fine. That's exactly what I tried to tell you."
"You are injured, you are exhausted, and you are certainly in no state to think about fighting." He was a persistent little bastard, I'd give him that. "We thought of healing you, but we didn't want to do anything further without your permission." Smart guy.
"Well as long as I'm here, are you camped near a river? Stream? Anything?" I felt horrid and my first priority would be getting clean and properly tending to my wounds. He nodded.
"As a matter of fact we are. There is a small brook a minute or two away." He looked briefly to the small figure by the fireside. "If you wish, there is a healer amongst us whom could tend to the more serious of your wounds." He looked pointedly at the bandage about my eye. I sighed.
"Fine, I suppose." I sat up, removing the blanket. "Weren't there more of you people before? What happened?" To tell the truth I didn't really care, but I wanted to get the conversation away from me.
"Two of our number, Firowen and Celoril rode ahead to inform my father that we shall be arriving slightly late. Firowen? That was a woman's name. I found it hard to believe, yet mildly amusing that he had a female amongst his travelling companions. That," He pointed to the smaller figure. "Is Nólad, and that," The larger of the two, the oddity, looked up. "Is Cer." I made a sound of acknowledgement and tried my best to get up on my feet without falling flat on my face. It didn't work. My legs refused to straighten beneath me and I found my arm being held up by Legolas'. I wrenched it away as soon as I regained my balance.
"Thank you." He said nothing, but walked in front of me until we reached a small stream, picturesque as it bubbled over rocks. I collapsed down at the bank, removing my leather brigandine and throwing it off to one side. I was left in my elbow-length dim green top and dark leggings.
The first thing I did was wash my face. A more refreshing activity, I cannot remember. He was there, off to one side somewhere. I wondered why he didn't just back to camp and let me get on with it, but then again, he probably thought I'd try to run off. I wasn't that stupid. I knew to wait 'til the rest of them were suitably asleep.
"Yuna." I had just finished tying my hair back suitably when he spoke, interrupting the blissful silence.
"Hmm?" I didn't bother to look at him.
"What's going on?" What?
"What?" I stopped and turned my head to face him.
"What happened to you? How long have you been fighting?" It was easy for me to shoot some obvious, sarcastic comment back, but I refrained from doing so.
"To tell the truth, that was my first decent night's sleep in over two months now. That might not seem too bad to someone like you, but remember, I'm not like you." I paused. I might as well carry on, tell him everything. After all, what would he care? "As for what's going on, I'm not sure. It started about four months ago. The attacks were relatively small at first, nothing out of the ordinary, then…they started getting worse. More of them would come, at the same time, more frequently. It was…more than one person could handle. I had just dispatched a smaller group to the east when I heard of another, larger group, thirty or forty to the south. Imagine my surprise when I show up five minutes late and find not Orcs, but a troop of interfering Elves." He wasn't phased by my comment in the least.
"And the Ents?"
"When…when the Ents decided to go to war, that was one of the first times in their history for such a thing. To my knowledge anyway. They were…let us say severely provoked. Now, not only are there less of them, but they cannot fight back, either there are not enough of them together, or they are not strong enough. The Orcs generally stay away from the trees and the areas of the forest where the Ents stay. Instead, they almost go straight for wherever I am." I paused. "It's strange, I never really thought about it until now, but they didn't fight like Orcs. They weren't just mindless killers. I got injured, yes, but not nearly as much as I would have otherwise…"
"Did it ever occur to you that they may be after you?" I had to laugh at that.
"Of course not. What would anyone want with me besides to kill me?" He shrugged. A minute of silence passed.
"So, do you forgive me?" What was he talking about now?
"For what?"
"Dragging you away from almost certain death to travel along with me and my 'merry men'?"
"Oh, that. No, of course not. You still have a long way to go. But…" I added as I saw his pathetic infringement of my copyrighted Look™ "I suppose I shall stay with you until I deem I am well again. At which point, make no mistakes, I shall return home as soon as I am able."
"Fair enough." I was now satisfied with the condition of my hair and face, as well as soothed my aching feet in the water, and allowed myself to be led back to camp, where Nólad was waiting. I sat myself down in front of him rather reluctantly as Legolas wondered off to 'talk' to Cer, content that I was under satisfactory supervision.
The boy, for some reason I couldn't quite think of him as a man, gave me a brief half-smile, I assumed to put me at ease, before he started. His hands were quick and gentle as he applied all matter of mixtures to my face and other more sever wounds. Some smelling of honey and sandalwood whilst others I smelled of things I couldn't quite grasp in my current state, but reminded me of wild mint. As he worked, to my surprise I saw in his bright blue eyes nothing that so many others carried as they gazed upon me. There was no hate, no malice, no question, only an acceptance that, in my twisted head, made me all the more wary of him.
"You were one of two in the net weren't you?" I said, in an attempt to start a conversation that might give me some clue as to how he really felt towards me. If anything, I hated being in the dark on these matters. He merely nodded, not taking his eyes away from the gash on my left arm that he was currently attending to. I tried again. "Who was the other person?"
"Celoril." He replied shortly. His voice didn't contain any annoyance; he just seemed to be genuinely interested in his work. Strange.
"So…you two seemed kind of similar, same walk, same stance. Is he your brother?" Okay, it didn't really seem relevant, but even the tone he answered in could give some clue.
"Twin brother." He replied just the same. It was hopeless; I wasn't going to get anything out of him. Not in my current state in any case.
"Well…sorry about that anyway." I couldn't help one last ditch effort.
"Don't worry about it." He said pleasantly as he finished on my arm, wrapping white linen bandages over the wound. 'No luck.' I thought. 'For now.' There was one last thing left that he had avoided touching since he'd started. My left eye.
"May I?" He said, gesturing to the crude dressing. After a moment's apprehension, I nodded my consent. He brought his hands to untie the knot that held it up but I stopped him.
"I'll…do that." I wasn't comfortable enough to let him get too close, and besides, why should I when I could do it myself? With that I brought my own hands up and, after fidgeting for a while with the dirt encrusted knot, grasped the dark shred of cloth in between my fingers. He smiled again, still no malice but obviously a little nervous at the prospect of hurting the tender tissue around my eye. Squinting a little, he assessed the damage. There was no great damage to the lens or retina and after a few hard blinks I could see pretty much fine. But the cornea was bloodshot and the eyelid had been split at the bottom.
"Good thing is." He started off matter-of-factly. "It's not that serious. Bad thing is that it'll take about a week, even with my help, to fully heal." I shrugged. A week seemed nothing at all to me.
"Well," I said in a friendly manner as not to upset him. "Get started."
It was about three hours later, midnight. I had dozed for the time after Nólad had said that there was little more he could do for me. He had applied some poultice or other to the wound on my eye and it was now freshly bandaged, although it seemed to itch somewhat.
The group of three was positioned closer to the dying fire. From what I could tell, the aforementioned and Cer were lying on opposite sides of the fire, enjoying the Elven trance that was sleep to them. The Prince was left on watch, not exactly to my advantage as I naturally assumed he was the most likely to spot me out of the three. The big one didn't strike me as too intelligent and I hardly thought the boy, although a skilled healer had much of a hope in that area.
I waited. Something I was all too good at. Taking my advantage when I was sure Legolas' back was turned and his eyes were fully concentrated on the stars, I ran silently, and within moments had left the clearing and had the brook in my sights. Minutes later and I had put quite some distance between myself and those still by the fire. I sniffed the air. A scent that had been plaguing me since my previous visit to the water was heavy in the air here.
Amroth. I knew he was close but I couldn't give him a sign. It would not only alert him but the others also. Instead I decided to follow my senses and hope that they'd lead me to him. As I walked through the light covering of trees a thought struck me. Why hadn't Legolas picked up the same scent? He was just as if not more sensitive as I was to the unfamiliar presence in this place, wasn't he? If so then why hadn't he said anything? It didn't matter now. I'd just have to ignore the risk that I'd already been found out and carry on.
It was a few minutes before I finally found Amroth, his soft whinnies drawing me to him. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, not as far as I could hear. My vision was still obscured by branches, the fact that one of my eyes was almost completely useless and the fact that it was now completely dark.
"There you are my Ami…"I whispered as I drew near but drifted off as I beheld our unwanted guest. He must have known all along, maybe even planned it. But it didn't matter, I was leaving here and I certainly didn't need his permission, or his help. "What are you doing here?" I asked the futile question.
"Trying to make you see that it is stupid to charge back there when it is obvious you need rest." He replied sternly.
"Legolas…" I thought of saying "just leave me alone" but if it hadn't worked last time it was doubtful it was going to work this time round. "Please…don't you see I can't just leave it? Fangorn, I mean. I know Orcs; they'll get bored and start tearing trees down for no good reason. The Ents won't do anything, they haven't visited that side of the forest for years, they probably don't even know what's going on. I'm the only thing that can stop them and whether you like it or not I am going back." He looked swayed, almost as if he was going to give in, but if there was one thing I could say about him it was that he was stubborn.
"I'm not letting you go." He stated softly. "Why can't you see that you'll never beat them when you are utterly exhausted?" I tired to object but he continued before I had a chance. "If you come back with me and stay for a couple of weeks then I will convince my father to send as many people as you need to stop the whatever's happening." I glared at him.
"A couple of weeks! A couple of weeks and the whole forest could be gone, raised to the ground. And as for your help, your charity. Well you can keep it, I've never accepted it before, I'm not going to start now." With that I walked over to Amroth and prepared to mount him.
"I know better than to try and stop you from leaving." He said, sighing. "But at least let me have one last word?" I stopped, one hand on Amroth's mane and the other by my clenched by my side. "I'm sure that the forest can do without you for just a few short weeks, just as much as I'm sure you don't believe me. But do you really think that anyone, especially me, would think any less of you for accepting help when you so obviously need it?"
"I don't need your help…" I whispered.
"Yes, you do." He replied, risking to take my wrist into his own larger hand, drawing it away from Amroth's back. "Whether you like it or not, I consider you a friend. And I, for one, do not stand idly by whilst my friends are in such need as you are." I sighed, long and drawn out.
"If you promise it will only be for a couple of weeks." I could hardly believe what I was saying. "No more." He nodded.
"And no less. I promise."
"I'm fine!" I said in outrage. "I can ride my own bloody horse. I've been doing it for a long time without any one else's help, what makes you think I'd need yours now?"
"You're not well enough to ride a horse alone. You're exhausted, and if you fall off it would only make things a lot worse for yourself." I dug for something legitimate to say.
"But…Amroth would never let me fall, and…besides, I don't like the look of your horse." It was good enough.
"What? But Arod's almost exactly like yours."
"Well he should be!" I decided to surprise him.
"What…?" A look of utter incomprehension crossed his face.
"I told you it'd be your fault if I had a miniature Arod to deal with." His eyes widened in shock. "Do you have any idea how annoying it is having a pregnant horse? I had to walk everywhere. I had to watch the arrival of little Amroth into the world. Let me tell you, it is not a spectator sport!"
It took us just under a week to reach Mirkwood, now known as Eryn Lasgalen, me passing in and out of consciousness throughout. We had skimmed past East Lórien, not bothering to enter. From there, we continued North to the Old Ford, where we crossed the Anduin without much incident…
"Amroth! Stop being so stupid and get out of the bloody water!"
…We took the Old Forest Road to the River Running, where we continued up to the Elvenking's Halls. I didn't talk much to anyone, even Legolas. Cer, upon further probing, seemed intelligent enough, but he still didn't speak much, if at all. I was told that he was generally silent, speaking only when something really needed to be said. Nólad…well he was just naturally quiet. He was shy and the only real interaction we had was when he redressed my wounds. I retracted my earlier assessment; his good will was genuine. Although it was refreshing, I couldn't help but think that his optimism was something of a weakness.
To tell the truth, the biggest conversation I had with Legolas was when he explained to me the dividing of the woods, something I knew had happened, but the details escaped me. The northern region, up to the mountains, was named Eryn Lasgalen and was governed by Thranduil, just as it had always done. The southern region was named East Lórien and given to Celeborn. In between was given to the Beornings and Woodmen. With the fall of Sauron and the cleansing of the forest, the majority of the Spiders had dissipated. With them, Mirkwood generally lost the majority of its murk and became Eryn Lasgalen. The Wood of Greenleaves. I had to laugh at that, until Legolas told me that actually was what it was called, and not a publicity stunt on his part.
As for my inability to ride, this was proven when I mounted, rode unassisted for all of four minutes, then promptly fell off as I drifted to sleep. The remainder of the journey was spent with Amroth trailing behind uselessly, myself propped up on Arod's back, siting in front of Legolas. Which, by definition, made most of the trip unbearable.
Alright, so perhaps it wasn't that unbearable…
A.N. Reviews:
Serpent of Light: You see? You can't go, you're one of our best and most loyal readers. We weren't aware that the last chapter was a cliffhanger, but…I guess so, yeah. This is more of a cliffhanger, in my (Rai's) humble opinion.
Lilena: Thank you, you've just made me go back and answer one of your questions. Well observed. See? This is why we need lovely people like you to ask questions and point out our tremendous plot-holes.
jeffiner1127: Well, we'd be Cyber-Goths if we had the money, so if someone offers to buy us some cool, gothy corsets, who are we to refuse? Yes, we're freaks, and that's why you love us.
AngelsExist: Well wait no longer, hun. Thanks for stopping by.
NightLight4: I do like the Sam bit, one of the many random musings that hit you at three in the morning. This is a pretty slow fic, but things should heat up soon (In more ways than one winks).
Sparkle23: Ah, you're the one. Tali woke me up and dragged me kicking and screaming from my nice, comfy bed (literally) to come read "the best review!" I was not disappointed. Thanks a lot, you're one of the main reasons we spent half that day writing (in fact, you are THE reason), just so you wouldn't be disappointed. Hehe, thanks for the little ego boost, but I'm sad to say it will be short lived, as we'll change a few obvious things to keep the fic going (e.g. Legolas doesn't start a little Elvish colony in Ithilien, Gimli doesn't hang around wasting space…)
I Get Stalked By Snowmen: Hey! So do I! Anyway, nice to the point review, thank you for appreciating my little ™ after Looks. I thought that was a great idea, and no one seems to notice it. sniff
Pepsi Bob: Ah yes, the Sues, the greatest evil Middle-Earth has ever known.
Loofa Sponge: Do you have any idea how hard it was writing Haldir die? I almost cried in the movie, never mind writing about it! We thought about it, but in the end we decided to show off a bit of her week side by letting her grieve a bit.