A delay, etc etc. Hectic life, blah blah, school, blah blah, coursework, blah blah, you get the idea.
A.N. There is The Kiss v1.0 in this chapter, as well as a rushed v 1.1
A thousand apologies for the delay. Won't go into the mushy details. This chapter, however, is about as fluffy as a guinea pig pulled out from a tumble dryer. Enjoy.
Man of the month: Billy Boyd (One very huggable Scotsman.)
Chapter Dedicated to: Us. Cos we've worked our asses off to get this chapter up, even though it's two months late. Also, the Rasmus. Who rock. A substantial amount. Haven't stopped listening to collection of 50-odd songs the entire week. They have been our little shove towards the keyboard. As compensation for the illegal download of said 50 songs, we are shamelessly plugging their album, Dead Letters. Get it.
"...You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive..."
The Goo Goo Dolls ~ Iris (one of the best songs ever written, and a personal fave)
Chapter 30: Façades
"Hello, ladies." Firowen greeted suavely as he strode into the courtyard me Jen and Narin were sat in, trying desperately to achieve a moments peace from the influx of courtiers, who out of nowhere had began to renew their attack on the palace. As so often was the case, someone beyond the close circle of friends and family had got wind of the break up two days before. Within hours seemingly countless brainless, breastless, skinny twits had crawled out of the wood work, willing to do practically anything and everything to win the fair princes heart.
"To what do we owe the honor?" Jen smiled, her honey blond curls glinting in the evening sun. She was still far too incased in the glow of pre-wedded bliss to continue her and Firowen's now seemingly pointless war.
"Well." He replied, sitting down beside Narin and gently slipping an arm around her petit shoulders. I was tempted to grin my face off and squeal the words "By the Valor! That is so cute!" but remembered I just wasn't that sort of a person. "It seems that there was quite surplus of alcohol left over after the banquet and I have subsequently managed to acquire a rather large amount of it."
"I like where this is going." I smiled. He slowly arched an eyebrow and turned his gaze towards me.
"Somehow I never figured you for a drinker, Yuna." I regarded him for a moment.
"I assure you, my dear, that I could drink you, Cer, Legolas, Celoril and Nólad under the table and still be able to stand straight in the morning."
"And what makes you so cocky?"
"Have you ever heard of this little race called Dwarves?"
"No, never."
"Very funny." I said, my clear it was anything but. "Well, once I had a very, shall we say, unfortunate
encounter with them in the grandly named Mines of Moria. They made a deal that the only way they'd
release me was if I could beat at least ten of them in a drinking contest. They like that sort of thing."
"So how many did you manage?" Jen inquired.
"Eight." I sighed." I might have actually beaten all of them had I managed to stay conscious. Tough little
buggers those Naugrim, though I guess that was Aulë's intention. So where's this little gathering going to
be held? "
"Well, it's just like before, in the clearing. Though now that I know what a seasoned professional you are when it comes to drink I'll break out some of my special batch I've been saving for just such an occasion." I cringed at the image of a group of drunk elves in the middle of the forest. "There's just one tiny little thing..."
"What?"
"Legolas wants to ask that Hix guy to come."
"...Oh..." I thought for a moment. "Why?"
"Something about 'no hard feelings,' though I suspect we're all just in for a night of awkwardness."
"You don't want to invite him?"
"It's up to Legolas, really, but I can see this not ending very well."
"Maybe it won't be so bad," Narin started empathetically, piping up for the first time. "He didn't seem to care when he told us, so maybe he won't care when he sees then together. In fact...he almost looked better. It's like if she didn't break it off, he would have."
"But...it just doesn't seem realistic..." Firowen pondered.
"That's what I thought, nothing's ever just perfectly mutual, don't you think, Yuna?" That took me a little by surprise.
"Um...no, not really, to tell the truth. I wouldn't exactly know."
And it was true. I had never had any admirers I'd consider taking seriously, and as a result, I'd never had to deal with the break-up that would inevitably follow. Although I suppose it did strike me as a little odd that neither party seemed negatively affected by the decision.
~*~
Was it a bad thing that I could barely see my own hand? I shook my head in an attempt to clear it, clutching the tiny glass of the most foul-tasting liquid I'd ever had the misfortune to have forced down my throat 'to help you relax', Firowen had said. Cer sat in front of me, eyes perfectly in the here and now, cool and calculating, despite having already reduced Nólad to periodically laughing at the mention of the word 'green', and Celoril having found refuge hurling in the bushes. I looked him square in the eye and took a swig, the foul liquor branding a trail down my throat. There was a plum seed floating in the bottle, a testament to its potency, all traces of the actual plum happily fermented away. I coughed, but forced the drink to stay down, refusing to lose to the other half-elf. There was a cheer from Firowen, my self-appointed manager as he sat behind, egging me on. Cer took another glass indifferently and downed it in one go, the only evidence of discomfort being the slight twitch at the corners of his mouth as he swallowed. My turn. If I took the next shot, it would be my eighth. I knew my limits, and my intoxicated state I was able to admit defeat.
"And this, I'm afraid, is where I stop." I said, forcing back a burp.
"Oh, but you were so close. Look, he's swaying!" Firowen pouted.
"If I drink any more of that special brew of yours, I won't make it back to my room with my dignity intact."
"That's the point."
"Well, what about you? Why don't you finish him off, you've barely touched the stuff."
"...Me, oh no, I couldn't possibly. I'm the host, it just wouldn't be polite. Hix, come over here." The elf, who'd for most of the evening been sat talking funnily enough with Legolas, turned to face the two of us. Cer was just standing up and with great stability I had to say. Taking a total of three steps forward he proceeded with each to let his center of gravity slip just that bit closer to the floor until he was lying flat on his stomach. He lay, his hand twitching slightly, taking up a vast majority of the small clearing. With a squeal that pierced the ear drums and left my already tense senses reeling, Jen jumped up and, as the good fiancée she was, ran to his side.
"What have you done to him!" Her words were slightly slurred and it was indeed a miracle that she'd made it over to him without tripping.
"He'll be fine in a while." Firowen spoke, knowing full well that it was already difficult for me to get out a sentence, let alone defending myself to a thoroughly pissed Jen. "Now come on Hix, this girl needs a drink and Yuna's not going to have one unless you're sitting here in front of her." My nose, which seemed partially detached from my face at that precise moment, wrinkled in a long and arduous gesture as I thought to myself 'I do?' He regarded me for a moment, his eyes meeting mine briefly. I winked at him smiled wolfishly, it was defiantly the alcohol. He smirked.
"I think she's had quite enough already." Beside him Legolas was staring at me as well.
"Nonsense." I sniffed, sitting upright once more and forgetting all mentions of limits. "Another twenty drinks and I could still kick your arse. Now come on, don't deprive an old lady of her liquor." He glanced briefly at he prince, was met with a arch of an eyebrow, and turned back to me once more. Nodding slightly, he stood up and made his way over to the small log opposite myself.
"The gentlemen has made a wise choice." Firowen put down two clean glasses and filled them up to the brim. I stared him in the eye, gripping the smooth surface of the glass. In perfect unison we downed the contents again, and again, and again. After four shots, the level of liquid in the bottle severely dwindling, I was not only thoroughly drunk but ready to do just about anything. And Firowen knew it.
"Now how about we make this interesting."
"Oh, I fink iz intwestin eogh." I struggled to keep my words understandable, not that it worked.
"Come on, it's just a bit of fun." He continued innocently. I shrugged.
"Iz up to Hix." Firowen looked to the other blond.
"I'm sure I'll regret this later, but why not."
"In that case we might as well let everyone join in." He took down the bottle from the tree stump that acted as a crude table and stood on it. "Lords and Ladies, if I could have your attention for but a moment." Seven pairs of, in some cases very bloodshot, eyes turned to look at him. "Saiyulna is about to begin." He said the word as if it were some dark mystery that only the small group of friends were privy to. There seemed to be a hint of a smile on everyone's lips but us two sat at odds and in little more than a minute they were all crowded around, even Cer who'd only just become conscious once more. Ten glasses were set, one for each person, and filled by the rather over enthusiastic novice of a barman that was Firowen.
"Saiyulna?" Hix questioned a moment before I did.
"The rules are simple really, the bottle spins around, and whoever it stops at gets to choose between answering a question, a glass, a forfeit, and in some rather special cases," Here, he looked pointedly at Jen, although she didn't seem to notice, "Removing an item of clothing." The bottle was spinning in the center of the irregular circle we had formed before any of us had a chance to object. It landed, rather precariously, on Nólad.
"Nólad!" The contents of the glass in front of him were gone before a moment had passed. He gave us a tight smile after setting it back on the stump and set the bottle spinning once more.
"Tengaar!" The elf seemed rather surprised and slightly horrified.
"Oh...um...question?" She said uncertainly.
"What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you?" Firowen asked intently.
"Uh, well, it would probably have to be when I flashed the King of Gondor." There was a deep intake of breath by everyone excluding Hix and Legolas.
"You what?" I questioned, wide-eyed.
"Well, I was riding into Rivendell after quite a long journey, and it wasn't like I knew who he was back then, how would I know he was going to become one of the most powerful men in Arda? But anyway, my skirt got caught in one of the saddle bags as I was dismounting and I kind of flashed him a very large portion of my thighs." I only barely managed to clamp my mouth shut in time before a shriek of laughter emerged when I pictured the little event. "It was far worse when I found out that he was probably going to be my uncle if everything went smoothly.." I cackled with laughter. She shrugged, a noticeably embarrassed smile still plastered on her cherub like face. "I guess it doesn't matter any more." The bottle was sent spinning once more.
"Firowen!"
"Oh decisions, decisions." He smirked, the fire casting sinister shadows spilling across his features. He chuckled lightly, a thought entering his head that was undoubtedly ungentlemanly. "However much I'd hate to disappoint you girls by not taking my clothes off, though I'm sure you already mentally undress me." Every single female in the group-including Narin-rolled their eyes exasperatedly. "It's going to be a drink for me...though than again, perhaps a truth is in order?" He looked to the group. Many a death glare was thrown his way.
"Just get on with it." Legolas said what I was sure everyone was thinking.
"Alright, alright." He brought the glass that had been poured for him up to his lips. "But perhaps..."
"Ahhh!" The outrage was unanimous.
"Okay, Hix, you hold his arms, Nólad, you get his legs and I'll shove that glass down his throat." The glass was emptied in less than two seconds and once again the bottle was sent spinning.
"Yuna!" By now everybody, even Hix, had joined the chorus.
"Oh..." I uttered "Uh...well I don't trust myself to have another drink just now, or to confess anything and I don't trust you people not to force me to jump in the lake or something. Besides, this bodice is killing me...so, um." I stood up and reached for the string that was laced up the back. And just kept reaching. After spinning round a couple of times like a dog after its tail, I stopped, blinking a few times in hazed confusion.
It had taken a very short amount of time for Narin to start laughing hysterically and Cer and Jen to start playing 'let's find each others tonsils!'.
"Yuna."
"Uh huh?" I was still lamely reaching for it, though with a degree less enthusiasm.
"Would you like some help?" It was Legolas again.
"Oh, um, yeah." A lazy grin crossed both mine and Firowen's faces, though for somewhat different reasons. "I suppose you are the most qualified to help me in that area." It seemed as if all of a sudden a very large, very bright spotlight shone directly on the two of us.
"What?" Eight voices questioned at once. A strawberry hue graced Legolas' features as he half guessed what I was implying.
"Oh, don't worry, hun." I giggled, far to girlishly for my own liking. "I won't tell them about the little...incident near the Nimrodel." He shook his head – though his cheeks were still a perfect shade of crimson – got up and walked behind me. I stood there, one hand on my hip the other holding my ample mass of silver-gray hair. Within a few minutes the pressure around my chest was gone and the bodice gripped in Legolas' hand. "Thank you!" I sing-songed, dropping back down with a noticeable bounce. He smirked and returned to his spot. I reached out for the bottle and with the flick of a wrist it was a blur once more.
"Narin!"
~*~
Two hours later and the evening had fizzled down. The twins were discussing something that I couldn't quite make out to the side. Jen, Firowen with his arms wrapped around Narin and Cer who seemed generally indifferent to everything (though what was new?) sat grilling Tengaar and Hix about his past and her future. And myself? I sat, my head firmly planted on Legolas' shoulder, staring intently at what I could see of the stars. He in turn was humming a song couldn't quite recognize, a bottle that was practically empty clutched in one hand.
"Legolas?"
"Yes, Yuna?" He replied after a few moments, seemingly unwilling to break with the tune.
"Can you feel it? He turned his head in an attempt to face me that never quite worked.
"Feel what?"
"That queasy little feeling in the bottom of your stomach." He chuckled and shook his head before finishing the last dregs of the foul liquor.
"I shouldn't have let you drink so much."
"Nonsense, it's better this way." I took a few strands of his hair between my finger tips, idly twiddling it this way and that. "You can think so much clearer this way. Like Manwë's lent you his eyes for just one moment and there's nothing to stop you seeing into eternity. All of a sudden, there's no more mystery in the world."
:Really?" He said patronizingly.
"No." I replied with exactly the same wonderment as my previous statement. "I just thought it sounded deep." There was a few moments silence then: "Legolas."
"Yes, Yuna."
"What are you thinking?"
"I'm wondering whether I should rip all my clothes off and dance around the fire naked." My head whipped up.
"Really?!"
"No." He replied just as cool as he'd said his last statement. I tsked and lay my head back on his shoulder.
"You're such a tease, you know? You have all the women in Eryn Lasgalen and Eru knows where else chasing after you yet they know you're practically unattainable." I sighed. "It's pretty obvious why, though. You're strong, handsome, charming, maybe not as funny as Firowen but at least you're a perfect gentleman." I shook my head as much as my current position would allow. " I can't really blame myself, can I?" There was that silence again, but in my current state I didn't realize it was awkward. "I'm just going to sleep now, okay?" I never knew whether he answered of not, within a few seconds I was blissfully unconscious.
~* Interlude *~
"Yuna?" I shook her gently awake. Her eyes opened for a moment before shutting again. The others were leaving or had already left and I wasn't about to let her spend the night out here. "Yuna?" I tried once more.
"Uh huh?" She mumbled.
"We need to go." She was laying down on the ground, thoroughly incapacitated as I tried to make her sit up.
"Just one more minute." She yawned.
"Yuna, please?" She wiped one eye before sitting up fully. She blinked once.
"You're an elf." She said in awe.
"Of course I'm an elf, Yuna." I pulled her up and put her arm around my shoulders. "So are you."
"No I'm not."
"Okay, half elf." I replied dragging her along the path.
"I have the best idea!" Yuna suddenly perked up. "Let's dance!" I looked at her in disbelief. I could hardly keep upright, my head was pounding and the girl who loathed dancing had picked this moment to try and learn. "Please." She asked, fluttering her eyelashes in a manner that in her current sate she probably thought was cute.
"Yuna.'" I took her hand and started walking again.
"Legolas." She pulled me back. Wrapping my arms around her waist she brought her own around my neck, resting her head on my chest.
"It's too late to stay out here, Yuna."
"Shhh..." Yuna looked up and put a slightly shaky finger to my lips. "Just a little while, I'm not ready to go back yet." Putting her head back, she started to rock gently side to side. The truth was even though I was thoroughly worse for wear, I, like her, was happy to stay. The way she was at that moment meant that she didn't put up all the defenses that made her so hard to get close to. But, was that for the best? What she'd said before...What did that mean?
"Legolas...?" Yuna addressed me before I had time for any more contemplation, which was likely a good thing.
"Yes."
"Have ever been in love?" She asked quietly.
"Haven't you asked that before?" She shrugged. "Besides, it wouldn't really matter to someone who doesn't believe in it." I hadn't really meant to say that, but it was true.
"I suppose so." Not that she seemed to care. There were a few quiet moments then.
"Legolas." I didn't see the point in answering. Yuna looked straight into my eyes with the most innocent expression I'd ever seen on her before pushing me aside and dashing off with a screech of: "Can't catch me!"
~*~
We reached the palace a while later. I'd had to chase the miscreant half-elf until she finally became too tired to stand up, leaving me to drag her back. Soon, my knees had given in and now we were both leaning on each other, every step agonizingly slow. We both collapsed onto her bed -- I had realized that it would be smarter to take her all the way back, so she didn't end up passed out in the hall, woken up in the morning by a bewildered servant. I stood up again, every one of my sense screaming for me to stay lying down. I looked at Yuna, her legs still dangling off the side of the bed. With a sigh I lifted then onto it and rolled her over once just for good measure. Tugging a smaller blanket than the one that was beneath her from under her feet, I put it over her somewhat clumsily, ending up with myself kneeling close to her upper body. She looked peaceful, more so than I'd seen in a long time. Her eyes were shut lightly, her lips set in a small but blissful smile and her hair cascaded like a tousled pile around her tanned cheeks, accented with just a hint of cinnamon.
It was the only time I had where I could see just her. Without the façade. And in that moment, she was everything. I bent down slowly as not to disturb her, and, as softly as I could, placed a kiss on her forehead. That was all I could remember.
~*~ End interlude ~*~
The light drifted slowly in through the balcony, turning the insides of my eyelids a sickeningly pinkish colour. It was one of the rare times where I woke up with my eyes closed, and, to be frank, I was scared to open them. Never in my life could I remember having a more perfect night's sleep. The copious amounts of alcohol I recalled consuming meant that the dreams that plagued me the previous weeks had been subdued. But that alone was not the reason. The comfort of sleeping in the arms of another person was. The worse thing was that I hadn't a clue as to who it might be. The last thing I remembered of the night before was...oh Valar. Even the thought of it was enough to make me feel queasy. Though that might have also been the hangover. Sitting next to Legolas, saying things that I wasn't even sure I'd meant. But it was too late to take them back.
And now I was stuck with...Firowen? He was probably the best to hope for. I might get some sort of telling of from Narin, but in the end she'd understand. It might have been Narin herself, but she had still been fairly sane by the end of the night. At least...as far as I could remember. She would have made it back to her own bed if indeed she'd wanted to sleep. So who was left? One of the twins? Nólad was far too shy, or at least I hoped so. And Celoril would get a rather severe scolding from his wife. Who did that leave? ...Hix? For Tengaar's sake, I hoped not. Only one way to find out. I bit my bottom lip and opened one eye. Only ceiling. With a deep breath I opened the other and shifted my head slightly to make out the person to my left.
"Nghf!" I sat bolt upright.
"What is it?" Legolas sat up beside me.
"What are you doing in my bed?" I screeched. 'Valar, never thought I'd have to say that again...' "Staring at me..." My voice was far too high pitched for the both of us. It was also then that I noticed my mouth tasted like something died in it. Then again, judging by the alcohol, that was a distinct possibility.
"Um..."
"Huh?" I demanded, before common sense caught up with me. "But of course you're an elf...you sleep like that all the time..." I cleared my throat. "Not that that explains what you're doing here..." I said primly.
"I...uh...took you back—"
"You took me back?" I scoffed. "From what I remember, you were in much the same state as I last night. It seems, Mirkwood, that you can't handle your drink. So I severely doubt that you'd be able to drag me all the way back here." He seemed fully awake now. Though a scolding from me first thing in the morning was enough to do that to anyone.
"Why are you being to defensive, Yuna?" He looked me straight in the eyes, I felt my resolve slipping...I felt like screaming 'why? Because I've made an utter fool of myself. And I seem to do that a lot around you...' It could have been so simple, all I had to do was keep my mouth shut. But I couldn't even manage that. "If you're worried about what you did last night, then you don't have to be. We all said things, did things we didn't mean, and you of all people should know that it doesn't matter in the morning." There was silence for a moment. "It's all in the past, alright?"
"Alright," I said, and was amazed I'd been half convinced.
"Now that only thing that does matter is how you managed to rope me into staying the night with you." My mouth fell open.
"You..." He had his arms up before the pillow hit him. Of course, the pillow being one of those extra-sensitive types, sent a multitude of small white feathers spilling over the two of us. We sat there for a moment, looking like an odd pair of chickens before he got out of the bed.
"I should..."
"Yes..." I nodded. He walked towards the door, a small trail of white drifting behind him. He paused, turned around with a smirk and said:
"Pleasure."
"Get out of here before I find my blade and use your pretty blonde self to polish it." And with that he was gone, leaving me to my tempestuous thoughts.
~*~ Interlude ~*~
The door closed quietly behind me, I leant my weight on it for a moment, sighing due to nothing in particular. No, that was a lie, there was definitely something. Everything seemed so muddled up all of a sudden.
Yuna. It was always about her these days. Everything she did made me question myself just that little bit more. People had already mentioned it, how different I seamed since I'd come back. So coy, so unsure. And now I knew exactly why.
Her. It was always about her. Everything I said, everything I'd done had been a feeble attempt to try and understand her. So in the end I could better understand the effect she had on me. I'd never been like this before. It's true what they say about close friends. The more you're around them, the more like them you become. It was no different for Firowen and I. When we were younger, we'd built up quite a reputation amongst the young ladies of Eryn Lasgalen. But Firowen had never let women change him, but I had.
Tengaar, when I met her, I was so sure she was the one. In my mind, there might as well have been no other women but her. So, I grew up, hoping she'd see me as someone she could spend the rest of her life with also. In hindsight, perhaps that was what had started to drive her away in the first place. But that was nothing compared to what was happening now. My confidence had been reduced to shreds, if only because I had no idea how to read Yuna. There were subtle signs, of course. Body language, a slip of the tongue. But it was also clouded, like trying to figure out a puzzle blindfolded. You only had one sense to rely on, and even that you could hardly trust.
But that was the point, wasn't it? She never let anyone too close, and there was no point in me thinking I was an exception. It was doubtful I'd ever see the true her. The one I hoped...no. No, I couldn't let a few drunken lines destroy me. I couldn't live each day hoping she might give me a sign that my sentiments were not misplaced. I couldn't let another woman change me. Not so soon after the last one. I had to find myself again. And if that meant letting her go, so be it. I took my weight off the door and was about to head down the corridor before I saw an overly familiar face.
"What have we here, Greenleaf?" Firowen said, wide-eyes. "Do my eyes deceive me, or have you indeed just exited a certain Lady's room?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively.
"You should know me better by now, Firowen." It was a lame defense, however true.
"Oh you don't expect me to give up that easily. Not when I can make use of this for both of you for a good while."
"If that is your wish," I said, unwilling to talk about it, even with him. "Though it was entirely innocent. If you'll excuse me." I turned on my heel, and headed for my room, thankful he had enough sense not to come after me.
~*~ End interlude ~*~
Three days had passed rather uneventfully since That Night. And I'd spent them more or less in the comfort of the palace's library. There were enough books and scrolls in there to keep me interested for weeks, and I felt it would be a shame if I'd left without reading at least some of them. Not, of course, that that was the entire reason. I was determined not to face Legolas until I'd come to terms with what I'd said. Even if that took a while. I figured the less places I went where I could bump into him, the better. And as he seemed to have pretty much the same idea, I was utterly sure I wasn't just being paranoid. I sighed and shut the book I was reading. Having lost most, if not all interest in it two chapters back. That was it. I was sick of staying cooped up in here. If I met him, so what? Maybe I had meant what I said, but what did it matter? I was a fool if I was to let a few drunken words destroy what friendship we had. Getting up out of the chair that I'd left quite a deep imprint in, I left the large musty room.
Where to now? I didn't particularly feel like talking to anyone, but where did that leave me? Amroth, of course. With Valandil gone, and the attention from the tournament at least dwindling a little. There was no one there who would bother to disturb me. With that thought, I headed down the corridor, and within ten minutes found myself within the aforementioned stables, brushing bits of straw from Amroth's flank. The horse, never one to turn down attention of any kind, kept turning his head towards me in an attempt to nibble off my sleeve. The place was, for the most part, quiet. A neigh from the horses or sounds of a far-off conversation the only thing to break the silence. There was a pair of feet drawing near, but I ignored them. It was probably just a stable hand in any case. Bad move.
"Yuna?" I turned quickly to see...
"Oh, Legolas, hello." I said, beaming. Damn, damn, damn, my head screamed. Though I still managed to maintain the utterly false smile plastered to my face. "Where have you been the past few days?"
"Oh, my father needed me to take care of a few things. You?"
"Oh, um, just enjoying your fabulous library." The corners of my mouth hurt. I was standing there, being completely obvious about tying to make the best of an utterly hopeless situation. Whereas he seemed pretty much...fine. He didn't even need the false smile. He was, as far as I could tell, completely indifferent to the situation. Stupid elf.
"I was just about to go for a ride. Would you care to join me?"
"Sure!" I said, as if he'd just offered me eternal happiness.
"Good. There's this place I want to show you.
~*~
We had arrived a scant few minutes after we left. The 'place' I specified was frequently visited by many, from the palace and village alike, although it was deserted for the afternoon. It was a rather cliched piece of scenery overall, consisting of a cascading waterfall, no more than ten feet in height, ending in a tiny estuary surrounded by foliage that trickled into a meandering stream. The water came from a spring in the mountains, and was perfectly clear, skimming over the rocks that blocked its path. We sat on the bank overlooking the frothy surface of the water below, her legs dangling over the edge of the drop.
"So, why are we here again?" She asked suddenly, not having said a word since our arrival, merely surveying the area with a barely perceptible smile gracing her lips.
"A lot of people think this is a nice place, and frankly so do I. I thought I'd show it to you before you left." It was the truth. I had wanted to show it to her earlier, but the time had never been quite right. My thought that she might be more comfortable in a thoroughly deserted forest area seemed to be correct, as she took on a relaxed posture that stiffened ever so slightly after my last sentence.
"Who says I'm leaving?" She said guardedly.
"Narin, seeming rather distressed."
"Oh..."
"So are you?" I asked after a while.
"I can't very well stay here forever can I?" There was a long moment, where I chose to remain in silence, hoping she would get the message. "Besides, I need to see for myself what, if anything, is happening in Fangorn."
"So you will leave me again with so many questions?"
"What do you mean?" She said after a pause, turning her head to look at me.
"You have to admit that we've known each other for quite some time now, and even though I feel I know you...I don't. Not really."
"I'm not a very easy person to get to know" She said matter-of-factly.
"I know. But I also know that in the end it'll be worth it." I said it before I could stop, then scolded myself for having qualms about voicing my opinions in the first place. After all, it wasn't as if the sentence could be taken differently, could it?
"What do you want to know?"
"What happened to your parents, you never really told me."
"I never really told anyone, but I guess you've earned the right to know." She sighed, turning to stare into the water below. "I told you before that my father was from Gondor. But he wasn't just an ordinary peasant, not even an ordinary soldier for that matter. In fact he was considered nobility." She laughed without humour. "Curiosity overtook me a scant twenty years ago, and I traveled to the White City to trace what I could of his – and my – lineage."
"And...?"
"It turns out that I had a certain, if not somewhat obscure, relation to the very person who had benevolently agreed to help me."
"And who would that be?"
"A prince in all but name."
"If it is the young Faramir you speak of, then you are mistaken. He was granted the Princedom of Ithilien by Elessar."
"He deserves it." She said quietly, another small smile working its way onto her face.
"And...Luccrecía? What do you know of her?"
"My mother was beautiful. I remember that much. She said she was born and raised in Lórien, about the same age as the Lady Celebrían. In fact, if I remember correctly, she was her handmaiden, or something to that extent. When Celebrían went to Rivendell, she accompanied her, and that is exactly where she met my father. He'd come with others to propose an alliance between Elves and Men.
"They fell in love. I suppose there was nothing that could stop it. They were married within the year and moved to Gondor at the height of Sauron's hostilities. To, of all places, a quaint little village just off Osgiliath. A short while later, I was born. Any joy was short lived, however. When I was scarcely old enough to remember it, the village was attacked as Sauron's armies advanced.
"I remember him galloping away, and the two of us fleeing for our lives into the night. The guards had tried to help, but all they could do was hope their miniscule efforts could waylay the attack for a short while so that we could get away. My mother didn't stop running, not until she was sure we were safe, even if that did take us all the way to West Emnet in Rohan. Five years later we received news that my father was dead – killed in action, I suppose I should be vaguely proud of that.
"We received a sum fitting for his status, though my mother was inconsolable and money was just another hassle to her. Besides, money wouldn't bring back my father. A year later, and it was obvious to everyone that cared that she was at death's door. She too knew she wouldn't last much longer, and so I suppose she did the only thing she was able to do for me at that current time."
"She sent you to Fangorn." My voice sounded unusually loud after her monologue.
"Yes. She even managed to take me there herself and make sure I was taken care of. Even though I never heard from her again, I wasn't ready to accept that she was dead for a very long time. My first trip to Imladris saw me meet Lord Halfelven. He and his wife seemed to remember my mother, and they helped me come to terms with my rather...special situation. It wasn't easy, but I've never been one to promote my own self-worth and sacrifice, so I'll stop pouring my little tormented heart out. I've had a far better life than most, I'm still breathing, for one, although I'm sure that's somewhat hypocritical considering how much I despise immortality."
"I still don't understand that. Most Men would do anything to have our years."
"Everyone, no matter what the race, desires that which they cannot have. You say Men desire immortality? And also perhaps strength, maybe freedom? Well I wish for nothing more than to have lived with my family, and mourn their passing until I found a distraction or was freed from this life by the sting of mortality. And yet I was gifted with the former, rather than the latter."
"Your philosophies intrigue me, yet I suppose you must have had much time to ponder over such things."
"But not you, I'll wager. Too busy being shadowed by that Aryana stick insect?" I shuddered visibly. Her image was not one that brought me great joy.
"The moment she came of age she's been at my heels like a rabid blood hound."
"No one's died of too much love, you know." I chuckled.
"At one point I suppose I would almost have agreed with you. Perhaps death would have been preferable to the tittering in the corners of the halls. Do you know one of them – Valar, I think it may have actually been Aryana – was boasting about how I smiled at her once, as if I'd just asked her to give me an heir."
"Well, did you lead the poor girl on?"
"No! I was having to be polite to everyone, which involved a lot of smiling, and she just happened to throw herself in front of me." She laughed. A sound I was glad to hear more and more often.
"Poor, abused Princey."
"It's not funny." I said seriously, she subtly bit down hard on her bottom lip to prevent what was probably a snort from escaping at the absurdity of the situation. "It's not fun being the eldest heir to a throne that isn't going to be mine any time this age, or the next for that matter."
"I thought you didn't want to become king?"
"I don't. I just wish those vultures would realise that. It's not as if they're after me for anything other than the throne."
"Well, ever since last week you've been top on the list of eligible bachelors in the kingdom. I'm not deaf to the constant giggles and chirping about your new state of singledom, and I'd watch out if I were you."
"Why? Afraid They'll hug-tie me and carry me off somewhere?"
"I wouldn't put it past Them. And I'm sure you've seen far worse. It's a wonder you didn't just give in early on and marry one to get them of your back." I chuckled.
"No. My mother would never have allowed me to do so. She always said that if ever I was to consider marrying one of Them, she'd march me straight here and dunk my head in the water until I came to my senses."
"Sounds like my kind of woman."
"You don't know the half of it. She was the only one that dared to boss my father around, and that was a right she took full advantage of. She insisted I marry a nice princess somewhere who'd give her thirty odd grandchildren. She was, uh, something of a traditionalist."
"What happened to her?"
"I cannot say, myself, for I have never felt the longing for the sea as strongly as she. Perhaps you have, and maybe then you can understand why she left, but I cannot. I may know why, but I cannot feel her pain at remaining in the Greenwood. I had never seen her so happy as the day she bid us farewell. It is not her fault, though, and the fact that I know I shall see her again banishes any mournful thoughts I may once have had. When I journey to the Grey Havens and take the ship to Valinor, I may then know her peril at being forced to stay here and raise her young child. She refused to leave before he understood why she had to. Her commitment to Aldaríon was just one of the many things I so admired about her." Something clicked behind her eyes as I spoke.
"Do you love Aldaríon?" She asked suddenly, the question certainly unexpected.
"Well...of course I do. He is my brother, after all. You know I only jest when I speak of him as something I found on the bottom of my shoe." She shrugged.
"Well, that wasn't the impression he gave me when he decided to sneak into my room to get his grubby little hands on my sword." My eyes widened.
"You didn't—"
"No I didn't mortally wound him, only scold him a little. By the by, there isn't a large sign plastered on my forehead stating: 'Please unload your troubled mind here,' is there? I'd barely looked at him before, and suddenly he starts to tell me of his anguished childhood now that you seem to have no more time for him." I furrowed my brow.
"He told you that?" I asked, stunned. "Why didn't he just tell me?"
"Oh, I forgot. I wasn't supposed to tell you. He doesn't want you to think of him as weak." She said flatly. "He admires you, you know. Think about it, it can't be easy having your praised, heroic, princely, blond self as an older brother. He misses his Nana as well, though I suppose that's to be expected."
"But...there are plenty of elves his age for him to be friends with, why should he feel lonely?" She sighed, and gave me a look.
"Tell me, Legolas, would you want to be friends with most of the over-fed, over-paid and overly pathetic offspring of the Nobles? That's exactly what I thought you were when I first saw you at the council."
"And have I proven you wrong?" I asked, keen to change topic. I had no idea that my brother felt so neglected, and vowed to seek him out when I had some time on my hands to re-affirm our relationship. Yuna cocked her head to one side in thought.
"I suppose so, though it'll still take a little while for me to forgive you." I quickly ran through the list of things I could have done to anger her and came to a conclusion.
"I can't help my hair colour, you know."
"You're only saying that because you can't think of a decent excuse."
"My mother is blonde, my father is blond, so it only seems logical that I would follow some sort of pattern."
"That still doesn't excuse you." I finally processed her earlier words.
"Wait, you thought I was over-paid and pathetic when you first saw me?"
"Well of course. The first thing you did upon noticing my existence was to make a stick-up-the-arse comment about that four foot shrubbery that accompanied the fellowship."
"And you responded in kind, as I remember." *(see bottom if you don't remember)*
"Hey," she argued, "That retort was inspired, I didn't miss a beat, and I'll bet I had you wondering for the rest of the council about whether I spoke of the race or the gender." I laughed.
"Then you know me far too well, for I must admit I could not wholly concentrate on the fate of Middle-Earth that afternoon."
"But I suppose you have proven me wrong." She gave me a sincere smile, no façade or mask to hide behind, just her. "You're one of the very few I count as a good friend, and I thank you for giving me a reason to stay in this mortal-infested earth." She chuckled, though it sounded forced, as if she felt she had to if only to take a measure of the seriousness from the situation.
"Do you really have to leave? I know you want to visit Fangorn, but there is nothing stopping you from returning here afterwards. Unless of course you don't want to—"
"No." She said quickly. "No of course not. I know. Narin's made it more than clear that I'm perfectly welcome here. In all actuality I'll probably return to freeload some more of your hospitality before I leave for Valinor."
"I'll go with you." I said, once again kicking myself for failing to think before I spoke. She froze, mid reply and turned, ever so slowly, to face me.
"What?" She asked simply.
"I wish to see my mother again as well." I said by way of a reply. "So does Narin, and Firowen expressed an interest in leaving these shores some time in the next decade or so to begin setting up a kingdom in Valinor when father sails—"
"I know, I know. 'I doubt he's going to let a little thing like there being no kingdom prevent him from being King.'" She said, sounding as if she was quoting a well-known statement. I nodded.
"Besides, I couldn't let you go on your own. They don't just give those boats away, you know. And who would you talk to during the voyage?"
"Fine, I suppose I could let you tag along," She said jokingly, thankfully seeming to forget my earlier slip of the tongue. There was a moment of silence, which, I reflected, was not entirely uncomfortable. "And what about me?" She asked, her face once again devoid of pretense. "What did you think of me when you saw me at the council?"
"You may think I thought you a great many things. Rude, uncouth, curt, even barbaric. That was certainly the general opinion floating around at the time. But it wasn't so for me. I merely saw you as truthful, if a little blunt and tactless. You said what you thought, without feeling the need to glaze it over. I respected you mostly. Many thought you insolent, yet none dared to say it until you were well out of sight. Even then the Lord of Imladris was quick to put them in their place on your behalf. That you could command the respect of Elrond surely accounted for something. He said you had your reasons, and I have been curious ever since. I thank you for indulging me by answering my many questions." She was quiet, and for a moment I thought I had upset her until she spoke in a low tone.
"Know this: there are very few that I would unconditionally trust with my life, and far, far fewer of those that I would trust with my secrets. Especially those concerning my past." I was unsure what she meant by the ambiguous statement until she clarified by adding with a smile: "You're very welcome."
~*~ Interlude ~*~
The talk at the waterfall two days earlier had cleared the air with Yuna. Not only that, I felt as if she was no longer hiding. She trusted me. Now I knew I had to do the same. I already trusted her with my life and some of my secrets. But the thing that was hardest to give still lay with me. But I knew that sooner rather than later I had to take that leap of faith. But it would be in no way be easy.
I'd wanted to do it after we'd got back, but almost immediately I'd been called away by my father who'd already had me doing somewhat meaningless errands for the past three days. I had an inkling he meant something by it, but I was too preoccupied thinking of how to admit my feelings to fully muse over it. By the time I'd finished the last the tasks my father had insisted I do, it was already late at night. I felt rude going to knock for her at such an hour, knowing full well that her sleep had been patchy of late. But I couldn't stand another day anticipating her reaction to what I had to say.
I got to her door, knocked on it and waited for an answer that never came. After a while I knocked again but got the same response. Deciding that I would talk to her first the next morning, I turned to leave. And stopped. There were sounds coming from inside, none pleasant. I could make out a muffled groaning followed by a very loud crash that I identified as a vase smashing.
"Yuna." I said, unsure whether to enter or not. Once again, no answer. "Yuna." I tried again, this time pushing on the door. It didn't budge. I looked at the handle in disbelief. It couldn't be locked, she didn't have the key, neither did she need it. A scream full of terror emitted from the room. "Yuna!" I shouted and pushed at the door again. It opened an inch before snapping back shut. The sound of a rather amount of glass smashing only served to add to my panic. "Yuna, open the door!" I tired pushing it again, full force. It gave way with ease and I tumbled into the room. It was black, aside from the slivers of moon light filtering in through the curtains. Some bounced off the many shards of glass that lay scattered on the floor, they having once made up the mirror above the vanity. She stood leaning on the aforementioned object, her body racked by gasps and shivers. "Yuna..."I whispered. She tensed immediately and stood bolt straight. After a moment she turned in one swift motion, her eyes meeting with my own.
They were black. More than that. It was as if there was nothing there, just emptiness where they should be. I gasped and tried to pull my gaze from them but found I couldn't. Slowly and shakily, a broad smile started to form on her face that had a hideousness about it. I swallowed and tried to get to my feet, having ended up in a sitting position after crashing through the door. Upon returning upright, I took a cautious step forward, not wanting to scare her. She looked to my feet then back at my face. Her head cocked to the side, the grin still firmly placed. In a moment, she'd raced to the open door and out into the corridor. "Yuna, wait!" I shouted after her. I got out into the hall but she was already out of sight. Without a moments hesitation, I went after her, heading in the direction I assumed she'd fled.
Minutes later I found myself out in the courtyard, pebbles crunching beneath my feet. Up ahead I could here muffled gasps and the sound of flesh pummeling flesh, though it was obvious that one person was coming out worse in the battle. After the thump of a rather large something hitting the ground, there was the sound of someone leaving the scene into the surrounding forests. I got to the gates soon after and put rest the mystery of a fight I'd only heard. The bodies of two Elvish guards lay strewn at the either side of the palace gates. One lay thoroughly unconscious and twitching slightly, the other was doing his best to try and stand up. I strode over to the later, patted him on the shoulder causing him to wince slightly and told him not worry, that I'd go after her.
~*~
It was a while before I found her, standing in front of the large plunge pool at the bottom of the waterfall we'd visited two days earlier. What had possessed her to come here was beyond me, but I was glad she'd stopped running. Her toes dangled precariously over the edge of the steep bank that led down into the rippling water and it seemed to me that she was swaying slightly.
"Yuna." I called to her quietly from where I stood a few feet away. She turned to face me, her hair a disheveled cloud around her face. The black pools met my eyes again, but the rims of her eyelids were red and puffy, the trails of tears etched along the slight covering of dirt on her face.
"Legolas." She said in a voice barely above a whisper. Yuna blinked, her eyes returning to their usual emerald before she seemed to lose all strength and toppled backwards over the banks edge. There was a splash as she hit the water and in an instant I'd followed her into the murky depths. I desperately tried to get a hold of her and after a moment of searching blindly, grabbed hold of her wrist and tugged her up. She gasped as we broke the surface but didn't have the energy to keep herself there. Wrapping one hand round her waist I struggled with her to the banks a little way off that were more worn down than the rest. When we emerged from the water she was fully in my arms, her body limp. I collapsed with her a little way from the waters edge and shook her in attempt to make her gain consciousness.
"Yuna?" I called to her but there was no answer. This couldn't be happening, she was too strong to let this happen to her. "Yuna, wake up." I said my voice cracking. The situation seemed somewhat similar to the one a few days previous, though with one horrible difference. She just wasn't responding. "Yuna, I'm begging you wake up." I could hardly breath, my heart was racing and I had no idea what to do to bring her back. "I can't lose you, not when I've finally realized that you mean everything to me." There was silence. "Yuna I..." She coughed, her body shaking
"Legolas..." She said, her eyes opening lazily. My heart skipped a beat. I couldn't help but wrap my arms around her shivering frame, drawing her as near to me as I dared. My hand cupped her cheek of my own accord and I reveled of the smoothness of her slightly damp skin, in places marred by faint scares. Her breath had become level and her eyes bored deep into my own, a lingering expression of terror painted on her features, slowly being replaced by an unidentifiable one. I wanted to tell her that it'd all be alright, that she had nothing to fear, but instead I did something I knew I'd regret but somehow didn't care. I blanked out for a moment and the next thing I new my lips had met her own in a long, lingering kiss that to my surprise she seemed to be returning. She pulled away suddenly, leaving me anticipating a swift slap or at the very least a scathing comment punctuated as she so often threatened by the words 'castrate', 'butter knife' and 'you'. But before she could say a word, and with a thoroughly bemused expression gracing her face, her eyes rolled back in her head and she passed out.
A.N. ** Extract from chapter 2 – Misguided (i.e. the first thing they say to each other):
** She felt Legolas lean in and say: "Dwarves." In a demeaning whisper only Elvish ears could hear.
"Men." She replied in the same dull tone, trying and succeeding to shut him up and divert his attention elsewhere. After a moment or two, Legolas resumed his original position, a look of perplexed curiosity painted on his face. **
(See! We had this WHOLE thing planned out from the start!)
Score! As for the valentine's day special (which you're getting at the end of April, screw dates), we think you can guess what's going to be in that...;). Anyway, to a) buy us some time, and b) make us feel loved, we are doing something we promised ourselves we'd never resort to. We're holding the next chapter for ransom. Until we get at least 20 reviews (and we know you can do it – you people have done it before) or replies via e-mail to our next point, this chapter will remain in its useless state on Rai's EVIL comp. *cackles*
On to the next thing.
We're in the process of putting together a cast page for the CITS characters. We have almost everyone sorted, apart from Firowen and Yuna. Unfortunately, the top choice for the part of Firowen (namely the yummy Heath Ledger) has been snatched by another character. We've thought long and hard about Johnny Depp, but he's too butch (Not for a second saying that's a bad thing of course), and we need your help! If you have any suggestions for the part of Firowen, please let us know. The best we've got at the moment is Cary Elwes (a younger version – around 1987-92 when he did the Princess Bride), mostly for personality but also because he's cute. As for Yuna, we have a few people down, but if you have any suggestions, they'll probably be better than ours, and would be most welcome.
Thanks!
Reviews:
Levanna: Thanks, we tried to make Yuna into an actual person instead of some unbelievably pretty warrior-sue who can take down five dozen Orcs without breaking a sweat. Her personality is a mixture of the two of ours, so you can get a pretty good idea of the level of weirdness injected chapterly into this fic ;)
Michelle: If you like long chapters, this one should be adequate. Enough fluff for you?
Tara6: Tengaar's out of the picture (or is she....? No, she's gone...)
Satori Blackthorn: That's what I thought. Why, indeed, how could one cheat when you've already got the image of male perfection? Though I suppose even he could get boring.....oh, screw it, who am I kidding? Let's just say she had a temporary fit of insanity, decided she was a lesbian, and that Legolas was far too manly for her.
Karvian: ASAP, huh? Sorry about that ^_^
Kungfu kitty: Cool name.
RobynPepsiGoddess1: *wuggles back* Thanks for the pep talk, and keep reviewing. You people are the only reason this story isn't discarded at the bottom of a mouldy pile of coursework.
Lilena: Not one, but two kisses in this chapter. Be grateful, dammit!
Sweet-legolas: EVIL EVIL Tengaar's gone, and now the 'good bits,' as you say, are about to begin.
Tarvalie: Thankies for reviewing. You're one of our regulars, aren't you?
Arcamenel: I didn't think anyone would actually get that...in fact, I think you're the only one. But you're completely and utterly right. You don't, by any chance, cling to Rai's window while we talk about this things and take notes, do you? To sum up, cos we're impatient to post this, we love you, want to have babies, blah, blah, blah, Firowen's ours, get your fangirly mitts off him, blah, blah, blah...
Iariel: Here you have it. Here's the nice little beacon of happiness in the sea of stubbornness and mixed feelings. Enjoy! Or, considering this is at the end, hope you enjoyed it!
Brynne: Once again, here's the bit of romance.
Melanie, SunXia, Linzi, Marpessa: Thanks for reviewing, here's the update.