Chapter XII

Perfect Girls

HDM: Well, I donno how many chapters more until the final chapter so yeah...this chapter also puts you at a spin.

Told in Todd's POV

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. John Lennon, "Beautiful Boy"

Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love. Charles M. Schulz, Charlie Brown in "Peanuts"

The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials. Chinese Proverb

I heard him screaming...and yet I turned away...

I could hear him crying into my window and yet I ignored him. It wasn't really my choise in the matter; Brittany told me to stay with her and I stayed. He went away after his tangent but it still tore at me. I don't want to abandoned my friend, even if he's a basket case that always gets drunk and high. I didn't want to...but she said he would just stay. I wanted to let him in but she gave me a good reason not to...am I that desprete for affection?

Morning came and she left around ten o'clock. She said she had to go to cheerleading practice and there was a pep rally later tonight. I told her I would think about it and I'd get back to her. I stroll into my room and shuffle through my CDs. I find my new Seether CD and put on Remedy. The bass boom from the stereo as the words scream through the speakers.

Throw your dollar bills and leave your thrills all here with me
And speak but don't pretend I won't defend you anymore you see
It aches in every bone, I'll die alone, but not for you
My eyes don't need to see that ugly thing, I know it's me you fear
If you want me hold me back

I take out a pen and an old copybook from my desk. I started on this story about a boy who learns he's in love with an alien that eats human kidneys. I start chewing on the end of my pen, trying to overcome this writer's block. I begin doodling little stick figures and made one have horns. "Heh, a little Pepito..." I laugh in spite of myself. I drew another stick figure and made it have messy bit of hair. I start thinking about the story but I keep doodling. I look over and I make a heart over the two figures. "What?" I do a double take.

Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll be the death of me"

I just ignore the picture and get back to my story. Tim walks over to the green lovely. "Are you going to keep eating other people's kidneys?" he asked. "Perhaps I'll just eat yours..." the alien spat. He took a step back but decided to press the matter stupidly. "You have a name?" he asked. The alien looked over. "Pepito..."

I don't need a friend, I need to mend so far away
So come sit by the fire and play a while, but you can't stay too long
It aches in every bone, I'll die alone, but not for pleasure
I see my heart explode, it's been eroded by the weather here
If you want me hold me back

What? I scratch out 'Pepito' and continue with the story. "I am called Pagslea and I'm an abomination to my people..." the alien explained. "We have a lot of people like that here..." Tim said, "So do you have a gender?" The alien looks with its piercing red eyes. "Why do you find me so interesting?" it asked coldly. "I mean, you're a nice polite boy and I'm...well I'm nothing good...it would never work out..."

Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll be the death of me"
Why does this sound so familar? I can't help but I heard this before. Why does Paglea remind me of someone, other than the fact I accidently put Pepito? I close my eyes and I try to remember. I remember...something bad that happened a long time ago...maybe a year? It was really bad because I tried to block it out of my head. Why can't I remember? Was it with me and Pepito? Were we ever more than friends? Were moments where I thought we were closer than we should be? All those times...when he was there for me...in a way Brittany could never be with me...

Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll be the death of me"

It was about a year ago and we were down at the bleachers lighting off firecrackers for fourth of July. He brought a case of Smirnoff Green Apple and Rasberry so us and a couple other rejects made our own party. Around midnight I was laying on his lap, trying to sober up again. He takes a swig out of his fifth bottle and looks down. Those eyes, either drunk or sober, they dance with colors and life. It's maybe the one thing I miss the most. His voice was cool, everything about him was cool. I admired him so much, he was always so level headed and strong. I wish I could be like that, maybe I wouldn't get pushed around if I was a bit tougher like Pepito.

Hold your eyes closed, take me in
Hold your eyes closed, take me in

Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll be the death of me"

"Just wait, Todd, when I'm eighteen and out of high school I'll be something great." he said with such enthusiasim. "What will you do?" I asked softly. I loved his stories of the future. He only tells these stories when he's drunk, I asked him once when he was sober about one of his stories and he told me that he didn't remember. "I'll...stop being the devil's son!" he exclaimed with glee. I let out a laugh. "You can't just quit..." I reminded him. "I'll...tell him I don't wanna do it! I just don't like messing with the damned, it's just too much..." I look up again in those eyes and smiled. "We'll go far away from here, Todd! We'll bring Brie and Myra and we'll go far away from here! Maybe back to New York, sure it was cold but man it was a blast!"

Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll be the death of me"

I open my eyes to hear a knocking at my door. I turn off my stereo and walk downstairs. I open to see Brie outside. "Oh, hey Brie, what's up?" I ask her cheerfully. "Nothing, I was in the neighborhood and I was wondering if you can come with me to the 24/7." she asked with a smile. I nod my head and I close the door. "Also, I needed to talk to someone..." she added. She's always asked me to lend an ear so this is nothing unusual...I guess I'm easier to talk to than Pepito. We walk by the infamous 777 abode where I see the door opening. Brie stiffens a bit, she knows of Johnny and doesn't want to end up like hundreds of assholes. "Squee, tell you little monster of yours that if I hear him outside throwing rocks at my doors he'll be bathing in holy water!" he yells. I redden a bit and nod. Oh god, I forgot...I did hear him at Johnny's last night as well.

"What?" Brie whispers to me. We step over a broken beer bottle and walk on. "He...was out drinking last night..." I tell her. Her eyes widen and then they narrow. Man, I hope she doesn't yell at him because of this...I don't really think he needs it. She looks away with a sad look. "What's wrong?" I ask her. "It was probably because of me..." I hear her say low. I cock my head to the side. "Why? You didn't do anything wrong..." I tell her. We reach the 24/7 and she gets a Cherry BrainFreezy and I just get a soda. I pay for both things after a small arguement about who will and we walk out.

"Promise you won't say anything to Pepito?" she asks. "Wait, what am I gonna say?" I ask her back. "Please Todd, what I'm gonna tell you is really important!" she pleads. "What?" I ask her, not getting the hint. She lets out a sigh and bites down her lower lip. "The baby isn't my boyfriend's..." she began. I almost spit out the soda. "Wh-what?" I yell. She shoots me a look, telling me to quiet down. "You mean it's Pepito's?" I whisper. She nods her head as tears swell up. I pull her into a hug as she starts crying. "Squee, I never wanted this to happen! We were high, we crossed the line, why!" she screams. She stops after a bit, this pregnant thing must not help the hormones. "Don't tell him...I'll tell him when I'm ready..." she instructs me. I nod my head, even though I don't think either way Pepito will be happy.

Later That Night

I decided to go to the pep rally and Brittany came back to my house. My parents are still abducted...I think...so yeah we've been alone for a couple of nights now. I go into the kitchen to look for any food but she pulls me onto the table. "Not here..." I say to her but she's already unbuttoning my shirt. "Come on baby, it'll be fun..." she coos. I pull off of her and look at her. "No, not here..." I say firmly. She begins to pout and walks back inside. Well, it's not like she has great conversational skills...maybe that's what frustrating about being with her. The first time was great but I want something more...and yet...ugh I don't know...

I walk back in to see her sprawled on my couch with her t-shirt opened. I couldn't help but stare; she starts giggling like a horny school girl. She places herself right on my lap, I stiffen. "Baby, why are you so tense?" she asks in a pouty tone. "Just, something that is still on my mind..." I said to her. "Are you talking about Pepito, again? God, you need better friends..." she sneers. The glint in her eyes darkens a bit. Then, a long line appears on the side of her face. "What's that?" I ask her. "Uh...nothing babe!" she says while flipping her hair. "No, there's a scratch on your cheek..." I point out to her. She just takes me into a kiss, trying to distract me. I push her off. "The hell?" I let out. Then, another appeared between her eyes on an angel and one on her stomach. My eyes widen in horror.

"Shmee?"

She jumps off of me and looks around. "N-No Todd, I'm not what you just said! What is a Shmee! I-is that a name of one of your ex girlfriends! Huh!" she spazes. She starts to panic, thinking of another thing to say. "Shmee, where did you go after so long? You stopped talking and I gave you away...why are you in Brittany?" I start asking a series of questions in a dazed manner. "Fool! I am Brittany, or rather whatever remains that hers I've taken over!" she screams, "But I didn't want to resort to this, Todd! I wanted to be with you to your knowledge but you pushed me away!"

"I...I thought you were a guy..." I asked her. "You made me a guy, I am whatever you wanted. I wanted to be the perfect human for you but there are so many that have flaws, this girl was as perfect as I could get!" she screams. "So, in reality, you're a transvestite!" I yell, "Oh god, does that mean...I'm going to be sick..." She starts to panic more. "But...I just needed more time, Todd! Why did you find out now! A week or so more...that's all!"

"You...had sex with me..." I let out. I think I'm going to be sick. "But...that's the only way I can stay in her! This is the only way I can be with you, to take away your nightmares and fears!" she cries. "Take them away! You let me have them! You wanted me to have them so you would always be 'needed'! I haven't had a nightmare since when you left me, now for a year I had constant dreams and I'm sick of it!" I scream. "Why! I was always there for you, and you threw me away!" I look at him...I'm so disgusted. I walk toward the door but she steps in front. "Don't leave me again..." she pleads, or he, I don't care. I walk around her and I run.

End of Chapter XII

HDM: woah! That puts you all into perspective, now doesn't it? See, some bears are not your friends...