I can't write angst. Hello everyone, sorry for the long wait but I found myself a little out of touch with writing anything non-fluff (plus life in general has kept me pretty busy.) Anyway, after scrapping many ideas, I made a pretty courageous attempt at this and finally completed it. Plot is a little overused but hopefully to a nice effect.

Section nine - Dealing with depression and unrequited love.

During the courting process, it is possible that no matter what you do or how hard you try, you will be unable to obtain your love. People deal with rejection in many different ways, the most popular of which are: A. Have a good bar of chocolate. B. Shout and scream to music. C. Break something valuable (preferably belonging to your ex).

XX

"I won't leave you, ever. I promise."

He seemed so final when he had said it. There was certain hardness in his eyes, a whole new type of seriousness that Fai had never seen before when Kurogane spoke.

Fai smiled. It had been different from all his previous smiles, just a little bit more genuine, just a little bit more sincere.

It had been so simple. It had been so easy. Coming to terms with their feelings was not as frightening or as agonising as they had initially believed.

That was three months ago, and now Fai was wondering if perhaps it had been too easy.

XX

They landed rather forcefully inside what looked like the audience chamber of an ancient Japanese palace. The group tumbled across the floor, Mokona bouncing happily from one disorientated body to another. There was hardly any time to gather one's bearings before they were presented with human life. A small, sweet voice that sounded mildly surprised.

"Kurogane?"

A young girl stood in rich purple and white satin, her dark hair trailing down to her hips, tumbling over her shoulders in masses of silky black locks. She appeared quite dignified but at the same time good-natured and cheerful, and just a little surprised at the unexpected intrusion.

"Tomoyo?" Kurogane blinked.

And in the background, a dark-skinned woman was fiercely hissing "Tomoyo-hime! Tomoyo-hime!" over and over again.

XX

The welcoming ceremony had been fabulous. Later, the party would agree to have never been so well fed in all their lives or met with such great hospitality since the day they had departed on their journey.

Fai, though impressed with the palace and the people in it, did not think that he could ever like the place or the people as much as it and they deserved to be liked. It was Kurogane's world. He had always been interested in seeing the worlds of his comrades, but not like this. He had not wanted this, had not wished for this, but Kurogane had.

It was really quite selfish of him. Kurogane had his wish granted. Fai should be happy for him.

Fai should be happy that Kurogane was back with his princess too.

Tomoyo was as spunky as the one in Piffle, majestic and unusually wise for one her age. Fai admitted that even he was a little drawn to her, that even he liked her. She was like the sun. It was only natural to be in awe of the sun, right? It was only natural to want to be close to its warmth and light. Kurogane's desire to protect her was only natural too and Fai would be willing to brush it off as that if only it really was that simple.

How he wished that he could live ignorant.

The looks, the closeness, everything reeked of more than a gentle longing to protect.

Fai turned yet another corner in the weave of hallways and passages of the palace. A row of sliding doors led to the sleeping chambers but only one was slightly open. Fai crept near enough to see the black shadow through the thin paper and slid the door open the rest of the way.

"So," he began, "what are you going to do?"

Kurogane sat by his futon; his back was turned to Fai who leant casually in the doorway, not quite in the room, not quite out.

There was no need for him to elaborate on what he meant. Though unspoken, they both understood the choices that Fate had bestowed upon them.

There was a flicker in Kurogane's eyes. At first, Fai thought that he was going to play dumb, but he must have realised how futile that would be because he simply grunted, "My princess needs me."

"What about me? I need you," Fai spoke calmly, almost matter-of-factly.

It was a fact. Fai needed him the way he needed warmth and water. The only problem was that Kurogane did not.

"I'm being thrown aside," he continued to speak calmly. It was probably worse for Kurogane, the ninja probably wished that he would yell and scream and throw a tantrum but Fai kept his emotions neatly wrapped inside of him. "You don't need me anymore so - "

"That's not it!" Kurogane's hands were balled into fists. They were shaking with anger. "Don't you dare think that I'd be so low as to do that! It's my duty!"

Fai paused to frown. With Kurogane's back turned to him there was no need to hide it.

"It's love," he said. "You're in love, aren't you?"

"That's - "

"When did you start loving her?"

"I don't - "

"How much do you love her?"

"I don't! Not in that way," Kurogane yelled. If he pushed him anymore, Fai really thought that maybe Kurogane would hit him, but then again maybe he would welcome being hit.

Kurogane didn't offer him to stay, though he probably knew Fai would have refused, it would have been nice if he had asked anyway.

It was cruel how Fate played its vindictive little games with their lives. If only they had not landed in this world. If only Fai had not fallen in love. If only they had never met. Fate. It had all been Fate.

"You're in denial."

"Will you shut up?" Kurogane rounded on him, angry and frustrated. "I don't love her, okay? She's my princess! I love y - "

He suddenly paused. Invisible lightening seemed to strike inside his head. A bird chirped just outside the window.

"I'm leaving with the others tomorrow," Fai commented, sounding much like a hollow log.

"I'll see you off," Kurogane replied, just as woodenly.

"Thank you," he inclined his head forward with unusual formality, signalling an end to their conversation.

XX

"The best of luck on your journey," Tomoyo seemed very majestic as she was offering them farewells. Fai supposed that the best royalty could turn it on and off as they wished. He admired her, and he could understand why anyone would be so attached to her.

"Thank you very much, Tomoyo" Sakura was saying. Tomoyo had persuaded her not to use any honorific when addressing her. Fai would have found it cute had his brain not been wallowing in other matters.

Kurogane.

It was cruel. How he could smile even at a time like this. It was cruel. How Kurogane could stare back with such apathy. It was cruel how neither of them had anything to say to each other, painfully cruel.

At first, Fai thought that perhaps Kurogane did not care much that they were parting ways, perhaps forever, it certainly would not have surprised him half a year ago, just after meeting at Yuko's shop, when Kurogane seemed so gruff and strong.

Fai watched Kurogane through the swirling mists as they began to depart for the next world. Then something slipped from his lips. A word said quietly above the gentle gush as Mokona sucked them in.

"Sayonara."

XX

The tunnel between dimensions seemed to spiral into infinity. When they finally landed in the next world, Fai was quick and discreet in separating himself from the others. The last whisper of goodbye still echoed in his head and he wished that he had never said anything. How cruel of Kurogane to say such things, how incredibly callous, because if he had just remained silent Fai could have lied himself into believing that he hated him.

Kurogane had been selfish to the end. He had chosen his home and a comfortable life to staying with Syroaran, to helping them on their quest. Kurogane had just dropped them like excess baggage. That was right. Kurogane. Not Kuro-muu or Kuro-pi or even Kuro-wan-wan. He would never think of Kurogane like that again.

I won't leave you, ever, he had said.

I promise, he had said.

Lies.

They were all lies.

He had been full of them. Nasty contradictions, and tangled webs of love and duty.

And Fai smiled, because he was really quite fond of those lies. He was really quite fond of Kurogane.

Like I said, that was my first attempt at angst in a long time. Please forgive me, I'm a little rusty. I'm still in awe that I got this up before I go on holiday. Well, it was fun, but this fic is finally coming to an end soon. Maybe two or three sections more. Isn't everybody happy? Oh, and one last thing, don't forget to R&R. I love seeing my inbox flooded when I get back.