A/N: So I just wrote this great author's note explaining a bunch of stuff and what happens? I hit a button or something and all the changes I've made have disappeared. Ugh, I hate computers sometimes and there were plenty of expletives in my head.
To summarize, I haven't update lately because (surprise surprise) my computer and the site were being weird and wouldn't let me upload the next chapter. But finally, here it is. Also, I used to use song titles as the chapter titles but it was way easier to make up my own for this chapter and it makes more sense, though not much. The previous chapter titles are probably random and don't make sense but the did at the time I was picking them out. Oh well.
This chapter is longer than the others, so you'll either have to forgive me because you want them shorter or you'll be happy because it's longer. Some true feelings will come out in the next chapter and I plan to include more insight into the characters' heads in the future. I know a lot of FF's tell you at the beginning if it's a Jude/Tommy or Jude/Quest or Jude/Shay, but I think that spoils the fun. Oh yeah, I'm going to change how I spell Kwest's/Quest's name. In the previous chapters I used "Kw" but now I'm going to use "Qu." Hope you don't mind. Does anyone actually know which one is right?
I spent a lot of time yesterday planning my direction with this story and it's going to get better, I promise, or at least I hope. I'm feeling very inspired right now because I got done watching the Instant Star marathon not too long ago. It's amazing how much I love that show and how the episodes never seem to get boring.
BTW, on All Apologies (I think) Jude is supposed to sing a song with Eden on Music Hopes called "Shatter Me." Anyone got the lyrics? I tried to Google it but no luck. I really think I'd like the song if Eden hadn't sung it. She butchered it.
And if anyone wonders towards the end of the story, the dessert actually does exist and is available at a Cheesecake Factory near you. Of course, there's not many of themto begin with, so if you're a small town gal (or guy even) like me, you'll have to go to a bigger city to get it. They're horrendously overpriced but soooo good and so worth it.
Whatever, on with the story. Oh, almost forgot.
Disclaimer: I don't own Instant Star, the characters, etc. And if you want sue me, go ahead, because you won't get much. : )
Chapter 4: Mmmm...cheesecake
Before Shay could say anything, Jude plopped down in the exact spot that she had gotten up from only minutes earlier, right in the middle of the hallway. Shay just raised one familiar eyebrow and lowered himself until he was seated across from her.
"I'll give you three minutes. Go."
"Look, Jude, I'm really sorry about what I did to you on your birthday. I-"
She cut him off. "If that's all you want to say, then you can just save it because I've heard it already."
She started to get up but Shay grabbed her wrist to stop her and pulled her back down onto the floor. "Just hear me out, okay? I promise you'll want tolisten tothis."
"And since when do your promises actually mean anything, Shay?"
A hurt look flashed across Shay's face. She couldn't decide whether it was from her hurting his feelings (if they even existed) or if she just hit his ego a little bit.
"Ouch. Okay, I deserved that, but let me finish. Like I was saying, I was a complete ass and every other term you can think of to describe me. I truly am sorry, and if it makes you feel any better Eden only pretended to be into me to get back at you. She dumped me a few weeks after your birthday after the press had finally gotten tired of the story."
Jude didn't say anything, just continued looking at him. Her face was unreadable; Shay had no idea as to what she was thinking or feeling about what he had said. Still, he was determined and plowed right ahead.
"I still like you, Jude, but I know I completely screwed up whatever we had and I'll never get another chance."
"Figured that one out all by yourself, did you?"
He sighed, beginning to get frustrated. "Yeah, as a matter of fact I did." There was a pause. "I was wrong when I said that Eden made me feel fine just the way I was and you didn't. You were right, I didn't even know who I was and I let Darius control me. He still controls me, as a matter of fact, but I'm working on it. Jude, I am the biggest idiot of the millennium. I totally don't deserve it, but I really want you to forgive me and for us to be friends. What do you think? Is there even the remotest chance of that ever happening in this lifetime?"
Finally a different voice filled the air. "At this point, Shay, even after all of that, I still doubt it." Shay's head fell down to his chest. "But I'm willing to try."
The head popped back up. "Seriously?"
"Seriously. But it's going to take time. A lot of time. And a lot of sucking up. Some flowers wouldn't hurt, either."
They both let out small, hollow chuckle at this. Their eyes met, and a very odd sort of understanding passed between them. It was weird and so unlikely, but a weight seemed to be lifted from both of their shoulders.
A door opened somewhere and footsteps could be heard growing closer to Shay and Jude. A pretty woman, probably around thirty or so, turned the corner and walked towards them. She paused for a second before continuing her pace. As she walked past she stared at them with a very confused look on her face. Finally she disappeared into the ladies room.
Jude and Shay looked at each other for a moment before simultaneously bursting out in laughter at the absurdity of it all. But it felt good to laugh, to really laugh, and for a little while they both forgot who they were, who they were with, and thepast they shared.
It wasn't long, though. Jude eventually collected herself from her fit and stood up. Shay noticed and his laughter gradually died away, too, before he stood up. They stood there, eyeing each other, until Jude broke the silence.
"Look, Shay, this doesn't mean we're best friends or anything. I'm not even sure I can call you a friend yet."
"That's fair enough."
"I'd better be getting back. They're probably wondering where I am and I don't want any of them to catch us out here. I can't even imagine what they'd say."
"Hey, Shorty, thanks. I know it's probably tough for you but-"
"It's a step. A small one, but it's a step. Let's just leave it at that, Shay."
Jude walked around Shay and headed back to the room where everyone was waiting. Gotta think of an excuse, Harrison, and quick. Just imagine what they'd say if you told them you were with Shay. They'd wonder if an alien had abducted you and stolen your body.
Just as Jude was about to open the door, someone got to it before her. She jumped back about a foot and looked up at the person who had scared her.
"Geez, Jamie, you scared the crap out of me! Don't do that again!" she laughed while she tried to regain her breath.
"Sorry." He tried to hold it in but couldn't; Jamie burst out laughing.
"Hey! That wasn't very funny at all," Jude snapped as she walked up to Jamie and gave him a playful but still hard punch on the shoulder.
"Ow! What was that? Don't be mad at me 'cause if you had seen your face you'd be laughing too!" Jamie mocked fake anger as he exaggeratedly rubbed his shoulder, which actually kind of hurt. Not that he'd ever admit that, of course. "Where were you, anyway? I was beginning to get worried and was on my way to go look for you."
"Oh, um, I just ran into someone I met on tour and we talked for a few minutes. Sorry, I didn't mean to worry anyone."
Jamie stared intently at Jude's face, trying to read whether or not she was lying. He gave up and bent forward to give her a soft kiss on the lips. "Let's go eat, Harrison. The food got here while you were gone. I'm starving!" Jude was dragged back to the table by Jamie and they took their seats next to each other.
Tommy knew when Jude came back to the room. He knew Jamie probably scared one year off of her life because he'd done the same thing to her himself in the studio before. And he knew when Jamie kissed her and she kissed back. He knew when she took her seat, when she picked up her fork, when she took the first bite of her fettuccini alfredo, when she took a sip of her water with lemon, when she daintily wiped her mouth with her napkin. He knew all of this without even looking at her because his senses were so finely tuned to her every movement. He knew about the air Jude breathed, he knew everything, and Sadie didn't have a clue that he knew this because it appeared that all of his attention was focused on her and what she was saying. It was true, he was listening to her, but after spending the last several weeks with her in Italy and listening to her incessant chatter, he didn't really care what she was talking about right now. Because he hadn't been able to hear Jude talk, laugh, orinhale andexhale for those weeks. Now that he had the opportunity he wasn't going to waste it listening to Sadie talk about a skirt she bought at this absolutely adorable boutique in Milan.
Tommy knew something else about Jude, too. He could tell that something was different about her; she was more...free. Not by a whole lot, but something had changed in those ten minutes she was gone. And, typical Tommy, he wanted to know what it was. He'd have to figure something out because he knewJude wasn't going to open up to him like sheused to. He probably killed their close relationship with how he acted before she left on tour and before he went toItaly with her sister.Working onJude's second album was going to be tough, but it was what Tommy had been looking forward to all summer.You are such an idiot, Tommy! I can't believe you treated Jude like crap and then treated Sadie like that, too.Always thinking of Jude's sixteenth birthday while kissing Sadie. Mentally Tommy slammed his head into a hard, brick wall several times. She asked, and I made a decision. I have to stick with it, no matter what.
Sadie was finishing up the one-sided conversation so Tommy turned his full attention back to her. All too soon everyone was done eating their dinner.
"Dessert, anyone?" inquired Quest as he grabbed for the dessert menu sitting nearby him.
"No way, I'm stuffed," Speed shared while rubbing his stomach.
"Same here," EJ agreed.
"No thanks," replied Georgia.
"Aw, you guys are no fun," Quest teased. "Come on, anyone? Tommy, Sadie?" They both shook their heads as did almost everyone else at the table. One person took pity on Quest and spoke up.
"Aw, hell. Give me a menu, Quest," Jude demanded as she shook her head at herself. Quest chucked one down across the table and, surprisingly to Jude, she caught it. With a sigh she opened it and began skimming the contents. I actually think Quest had the right idea. All of this looks delicious! Oh, shit, I'm never gonna be able to fit into my new jeans if I order any of this. Hell, you're only sixteen and on your first tour once, right? Wait, did I just worry that I won't be able to fit into my jeans, that I'll get fat? Oh my God (sorry ifthat offends anyone), what's wrong with me? I'm turning into an actual sixteen-year-old girl. Either something happened to me on tour or there was something in that fettuccini alfredo...which was really good.
The waiter walked back into the room. "Would any care for dessert or would you just like the bill?"
Quest started to speak but Jude beat him to it. "I'll have a slice of the White Chocolate Caramel Latte cheesecake, please."
"All right, anybody else?" asked the waiter while he scribbled on his notepad.
"I was gonna have something else but that sounds REALLY good. And there's no way I'm going to be able to say all of that so I'll just have the same as her," Quest answered the waiter.
He left and everyone at the table stared at Jude and just burst out laughing.
"What?" she demanded, exasperated and completely lost. "What in the world is so funny?"
The laughter continued until Sadie finally spoke. "Honestly, I have absolute no idea. Just something about that made me want to laugh so hard and you know trying not to laugh is like me going to the mall and not buying anything: impossible."
"Whatever, then."
The waiter returned carrying two plates adorned with two delectable slices of cheesecake that Jude and Quest were just waiting to devour. He placed them in front of Jude and Quest and left.
Quest was trying to swipe a bite of his before the waiter had even set the plate down. Jude dug into hers and didn't look up again until she was finished. Actually, she did, once, when Jamie took his fork and tried to steal a bite.
Jude smacked his hand away. "Mine. You had your chance."
This brought a mock offended and hurt face from Jamie and a laugh from everyone else. Two forks clattered onto plates at the same time as Jude and Quest finished their desserts.
"Nice choice, Jude. You've restored my faith in the opposite sex when it comes to picking out fattening and unhealthy but completely delicious desserts."
"Um, that's nice, Quest. Glad I could be of service." Jude picked up her glass. "I don't know about you guys, but I'm beat and ready to go home. To the best first tour I'll ever have."
Everyone else followed Jude and raised their glasses.
"To Instant Star."
"To G Major."
"To engineers."
"To producers."
"To family."
"To friends."
"To Spiederman Mind Explosion."
"To Jude."
"Amen!"
They tapped glasses and drank. Soon the waiter returned with the bill and the arguing began over who got to pay.
"I'll take it," Georgia stated.
"No, G, let me. We came unplanned so it's only fair to let us. I want to treat," argued Tommy.
As soon as this started Jude rolled her eyes and walked over to the waiter, who was still holding the check, undecided as to who he should give it to. She took it from his hand and walked over to the table where she flipped it open, scanned it, then paid. (A/N: I'm not really sure how she did but let's just say shehas a credit card or something.) Jude also included a nice tip for the patient waiter and handed the little black book back to him. He thanked her and left the room.
Quest had bee standing off to the side watching the entire exchange. Once the waiter was gone he exploded with laughter. Georgia and Tommy stopped arguing long enough to ask Quest what was so funny. He merely continued laughing and shook his head. Tommy and Georgia looked at each other then did a sweep around the room. Both noticed that someone was missing.
"Hey, where'd the waiter go?" Tommy inquired of the roomful of people.
"Oh, Jude paid the bill and he left. I guess you two were too busy to notice. Imagine that," answered EJ with a smirk.
Georgia and Tommy both turned to Jude and started to speak. She held up her hand, stopping them.
"Don't. It's done and over. Who really cares, anyway? It was just one dinner and one bill. There will be more, and I promise one of you two can pay next time. I'll be sure to order something really expensive, too, if it'll make you feel better."
With that she grabbed her jacket and said her good-byes to everyone in the room. She treated Tommy as a friend, but not a very close one. Jude squeezed the crap out of Sadie and asked how they were getting home.
"We're flying out tomorrow morning. We should be home around three or four after we get our luggage from the airport. What about you?"
"I started on the bus and that's where I'm ending. I don't think we're leaving until tomorrow morning so I should be home really late tomorrow night or sometime the day after that."
"Oh, ok. I guess I'll see you at home then, sis. I really missed you."
"Me too, Sades. I love you."
"I love you, too. Now you better get over to Jamie. I think you being more than five feet away upsets him."
"Ok." Jude gave Sadie one last hug. "I'll see you in a day or two."
They parted and Jude walked over to Jamie. After Sadie left no one else remained in the room except fot them.
"Well look at this, just the two of us alone together in this room. Think this was planned?" joked Jamie while he grabbed Jude's hand.
"Doubt it. I think they all left because they realized that Speed was having some problems with some of his bodily functions and they began to smell it."
"I wondered what that was."
Jude couldn't answer because Jamie had already bent down and started kissing her. He still couldn't get over that he could do that almost whenever he wanted. Jude was finally his and there was no way he was ever going to give her up. She's gonna break your heart... For some reason Kat's warning played over in his head. He shook it off and turned all of his focus to the task at hand.
Finally Jude broke away. "I need to go. If I don't the bus might leave without me. I'll see you when I get home, okay?"
"No, it's not okay, but I guess there's not much I can do about it, huh?"
"You always were smart. "
Jamie grabbed his girlfriend's arm and pulled her back for one last kiss. Right when it was getting juicy, the door opened, surprising Jude and Jamie, and they jumped apart.
"Whoa, sorry, didn't mean to interrupt," Tommy said as he walked over to where he was sitting earlier. He grabbed something that was hanging on the back of one of the chairs. "Sadie forgot her purse and made me come back to get it. Don't stop on my account; please, continue."
And just as quickly as he had entered Tommy left. Jude and Jamie were still getting over the surprise and hadn't moved.
"Um, wow. Ok, I really need to get going. Bye Jamie, I'll see you soon." Jude gave him a quick kiss and left.
After a few seconds Jamie came back to life and grabbed his stuff to leave. With one last look around the room he departed and headed for his hotel. As he walked out of the door he saw the tour bus drive away, withthe girl of his dreamson it.
Hope you enjoyed it! Please review! And be honest, too. Are people reading this and enjoying it?It would be greatly appreciated; a self-esteem boost is going to be needed soon.Anyone see the Sneak Peaks for the second season of IS? There's NO WAY I'm going to be able to make it to February 10th. Don't you wish there was a remote for life and a fast forward button? A pause, rewind, and mute button would also be good...