Won't go nowhere
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"Stay here, I'll get Giles" Willow said after she tried to do the spell with Tara.
"H-h-hurry W-w-willow" Tara said
"Don't worry, when fear starts coming I pretty much keep on going" Willow joked then got serious "Stay safe Tara"
"You-you too W-willow" Tara said.
Then Willow left with a sweet smile. The smile Tara had on her face fell from her face in despair, it still pained her to see Willow with Oz, but she made her decision and she chose Oz over her and that hurt. Thing was Willow and Oz had history but Tara was fresh and new and no history. She had nothing with Willow except loyalty, maybe that was enough to be friends. Sighing Tara started to clear up except the result of the Spell, Giles had to see it. That was another thing she had also had nothing with this 'scoobie gang' Willow formed with her friends. Buffy, Xander, Willow, Oz and Giles and that was it. She didn't feel welcome at all no matter how much Willow's friends tried, she was the outsider.
"Guess I'll always be the outsider" Tara muttered to herself.
Another thing she hated, by herself she talked normally but with other people she could barely put up a sentence. She couldn't understand that. She was shy, not special and stuck out way to much to make her invisible to all. Maybe she should become invisible, that will probably make everyone happier.
There was a sudden knock at the door.
"J-j-just one m-moment" Tara said as she finished clearing up.
The knocking on the door became insistent.
"P-please one m-moment" Tara said.
The person at the door started to bang the door. Tara opened the door to the last person she'd ever want to see. She froze on the spot at the moment, she couldn't scream.
"I find it very interesting that a simple gesture always gets an answer" Adam said.
Willow woke up at that moment, her five day old dirty clothes clung to the sweat that trickled down all over her body. This was the first time she saw what happened between Tara and Adam and this was shown only to her. Tara was punishing her for leaving. She was always leaving Tara, maybe if she stayed maybe the poor blonde witch would have stayed alive.
"Alive?" Tara's haunty voice filled the room again "I was barely alive before you met me"
The tears from Willows salty face dropped to lap like it always did whenever Tara spoke. She appeared behind Willow almost wispy. Tara seemed to always built Willow up and smashed her down again, like it was a game.
"Then you came" Tara said, her hand reached over to Willow's head, her hand barely touching the surface of it "You were my sun, my earth, my moon" she smiled "And then you left" her voice darkened "for a wolf-boy, who by the way cheated on you with a wolf-girl and you deserve it"
The tears on Willow's face seemed to burn the raw flesh as she couldn't hold it in any longer. Tara was right, always right.
"Cause you cheated on him with your best friend" Tara said "Couldn't make your mind up could you? I mean you knew Xander for a long time, heck loved him, why couldn't you have him? Oh wait! He had a girlfriend!" she began to laugh darkly "You just love causing misery don't you? But then dear Chase did take him away from you I guess it was payback"
"I didn't-" Willow began but Tara's laughter grew louder till she was face to face with her.
"Didn't what Willow? You wanted to hurt Cordelia, you wanted payback and then you got Karma from Oz. But you couldn't handle that so I was the rebound" Tara gave a dirty look at Willow "And I thought you loved me"
"I do" Willow cried.
"And here we are again Willow your lies, they make me sick" Tara growled.
"I never lied to you Tara" Willow cried.
"There you go again, lies, lies, lies. When will it stop Willow?" Tara angrily asked "It won't will it?"
"I never-"
"Look me in the eye" Tara said "Why did you leave me? It was for wolf-boy wasn't it?"
"No I-"
"Don't lie!" Tara screamed "When I died I followed you Willow! I saw you go straight to Oz" she began to break down "You call that love? You call that a lie? Admit it you never love me, you kept your heart for him"
Willow tried to comfort the crying Tara and to have her snarl at her.
"DON'T EVER TOUCH ME! YOU SHOULD BE ONE THAT'S DEAD NOT ME! I NEVER DESERVE TO DIE LIKE THAT YOU SLUT OF A BITCH!" Tara screamed, making the widow rattle from the force "YOU DID! YOU DESERVE WHAT ADAM PUT ME THROUGH! I HATE YOU"
"Still no answer?" Buffy asked over the phone, turning another page about ghosts and glamour demons.
Xander had called up about the prospect that maybe this wasn't Tara haunting but someone appearing as her. This would have been very useful except they hadn't found anything and Angelus's expertise could go so far but no one was willing to give up on Willow, not even Anya would who was busier than a bee. The only person not working on Willow was Giles because he was working on the nifty key Buffy and Angelus had found. As much as they loved Willow if there was a demon problem or possibly a hellgod problem as it seems to be Willow wouldn't be happy if the world ended because they were all focussed on saving her.
"Not one bit of hi or a bye" Xander said "She doesn't let me in the room, I have to be quiet to enter otherwise I'm on my ass on my couch in my apartment again and not that it's a un-comfy couch but it takes ages to get back by foot"
"How's Oz holding up?" Buffy asked.
"If he didn't take so many absences for her he would be here for her, just that he knows that Willow would be upset if he was kicked out of college" Xander said.
"That's our Willow" Buffy said "I just wish Tara would leave her alone if that is Tara"
"So, what do you angels do when you have free time?" Anya asked curiously, looking over to Angelus over her book.
"Depends" Angelus said, reading a page thoroughly before turning it seconds later.
"Depends on what?" Anya asked.
"Depends on the mood" Angelus said, turning another page.
"Like?" Anya asked.
"Don't you like Xander more than me and so you'd want to go find him and leave me alone?" Angelus said bluntly, Anya wasn't a subtle girl and subtlety didn't work on her and so bluntness had to be used on Anya which she didn't mind, she actually preferred it.
"He's gone off to guard Willow and you're the only one that is older than me" Anya said "So theoretically you are wise and mature, which I like in men"
"But you love Xander" Angelus said "Who isn't wise or mature"
"He grows on you but immature people have what you don't have" Anya said.
"Which is?" Angelus asked, finally finishing the book and then went for another.
"A sense of humour" Anya said.
Angelus did have a sense of humour but it was subtle and it had bite though he was never a joker compared to Doyle who was the funny one out of the trio especially when drunk and Gunn's, well, it was more along the lines of spur of the moment. But he had to admit Xander was a funny guy, in an annoying way.
"Bringing you back to Xander" Angelus said.
"I like Xander's joke, even when they don't make sense" Anya said "They shape him"
"So Xander's a funny shape" Angelus said, keeping a very straight face.
While Angelus and Anya were talking Cordelia took the opportunity to talk Buffy as soon as she came off the phone to Xander. After allit was one of those rare days that Cordelia Chase had anything in common with Buffy Summers and well Cordelia wanted to talk to Buffy about the whole angel business.
"Mind if we talk?" Cordelia asked as soon as Buffy placed the phone down to the receiver.
"Err sure" Buffy said.
Cordelia took her arm and led her up to the balcony before she spoke "Something has been bothering me"
"Did you have a vision?" Buffy asked immediately.
"No" Cordelia said, giving Buffy a filthy look for mentioning that horrible gift before returning it to original state "Have you asked Angelus what's he going to do once this weirdness sorts itself out?"
"Yeah he's going to stay" Buffy said confidently, whatever rules he broke no one was going to take him away from her. Slayer honour.
"I don't think that's going to happen" Cordelia said.
"Cordelia, he will stay" Buffy said.
"Buffy, as much as hate to say this he won't" Cordelia said, trying to be gentle to the Slayer.
"And why do you say that?" Buffy asked coldly at the ex-May Queen.
"Because as soon as this is over he won't stay" Cordelia said "It's what angels do once the job is done"
"And how would you know that?" Buffy asked, narrowing her eyes Cordelia.
"Because if it wasn't for Gunn Doyle would have left me just when I got the visions" Cordelia said.
"Doyle wouldn't-"
"Doyle would, this problem just happen to arrive" Cordelia interrupted Buffy "Which I'm kinda glad of, I don't want Doyle to leave me"
Buffy softened a little to Cordelia "And if he did?"
"I would try to find him, I think I love him Buffy but when he leaves I won't have anything of him" Cordelia said sadly.
"I'm sure he'll give you something to remember him by" Buffy tried to assure the brunette.
"But that's the thing Buffy, when leave they won't leave you with something to remember them" Cordelia said "They'd get rid of you memories of them and I don't want to forget Doyle"
"How do you know this?" Buffy asked
"Doyle was about to get rid of my memories of him when Gunn came and stopped him" Cordelia said "Think about it, why do everyone say angels have wings when they don't? People may have remembered meeting an angel but they don't know what they actually look like because the angel made sure of that"
"But-"
"No buts Buffy, once this is over we won't remember them" Cordelia said "Ever again"
Xander peeked through the keyhole of Willow's room, even though he could only see Willow he knew she was talking to an invisible Tara, well, invisible to him. He knew only people could affect Willow that way was if they meant the world to her which included Tara, himself and Oz. He had a feeling was Tara using some kind softness to Willow before breaking it and turning it into millions of pieces of harness. Sometime that army thing stuck in his head was pretty handy since that what military used to break a soldier then rebuild them into someone else. Except it appeared Tara just wanted to break Willow, but why? He remembered having a conversation with Tara after Willow chose Oz over her…
"Hey how are you holding up?" he asked the sorceress with sympathy.
She was in the local coffee shop, just wanted some alone time but Xander spotted her. So came over and to give her some company and comfort.
"I-I don't know w-w-what to do X-x-x-x-xander" Tara said, almost whispered to him in saddness "I thought she cared about me"
"She does Tara" Xander said "My Will has a gold heart"
"B-b-b-but why did-didn't she m-m-mention Oz?" Tara asked.
"She loves Oz Tara, there's no denying that but there has been some roughness in their relationship" Xander said "They had an innocent relationship that was kinda tarnished by the fact they cheated on each other" Xander sighed "Willow was ashamed of that and so she didn't tell you that Tara, she was afraid that you would be ashamed of her"
"I-I-I w-wouldn't have b-been" Tara said "I l-love her"
"Why didn't you say that to her before" Xander asked.
"B-because she doesn't" Tara said.
"When I say Willow's got a golden heart I mean it" Xander said "So if you say you love her she love's you"
"But s-s-she picked him" Tara said "Wouldn't h-h-have made a d-difference anyway"
Xander sighed, sorrow and heartbreak was never a thing people should deal with. He knew Tara was in so much pain over this but Willow had to chose otherwise there would be more heartache and prolonging something wasn't a good thing.
"Tara, no matter who Willow had chosen you have a place in her heart and not even Oz could take that away from you" Xander said "Willow wouldn't allow it"
"Y-y-you mean that?" Tara asked.
"Every word" Xander said "All you have to be is a true friend and you'll have you spot there"
For the first time Tara smiled "Thank you"
"Your welcome" Xander said with a soft smile.
Willow's sobs brought Xander out of his memory lane. He looked through the keyhole and saw she was rocking side to side muttering how sorry she was. He badly wanted to go in there and hug her tell her everything will be alright. But he knew if he did she would teleport him away from her and then she'll be alone with no one to watch her. He was powerless and he had sneaky suspicion that this Tara knew it.
"Hang in there Will" Xander whispered "We'll stop Tara from hurting you"
"Giles I think we've just read every book on elusions and ghosts in this shop" Buffy pronounced.
"Not every book, I've just received some yesterday they're in the basement in two black crates" Giles said.
"At least it's not a mystery box any more, you coming Angelus?" Buffy asked before she walked over to the stairs, Angelus gave a small shrug and followed Buffy.
He could sense some fear and pain going through her, being her guardian angel entitled to being able to sense the emotions she was going through. She turned on the lights and the entire basement was lit up. As soon as Buffy approached the black crates Buffy turned around to face him.
"So when are you going to do it?" Buffy asked.
"Do what?" Angelus asked frowning in confusion.
"Remove yourself from my memories" Buffy said darkly.
"Oh" Angelus said, trying to figure out how she knew.
"Is that it? Oh?" Buffy said "So when you do that will it be when you tell me that everything is okay or after Riley's funeral? Cause you're suppose to stick with me until I've mourned and move on"
"Buffy I-"
"I thought I meant something to you, after all you've broke these rules to stay by me" Buffy said "Or have I been used?"
"No, I would never do that to you" Angelus said, upset that she would think that.
"So why do angels make people forget? Why are you going to do this to me?" Buffy asked "I really care about you Angelus and if you left I don't know what to do without you" a thought passed through her head "But that's why you'd make me forget, so I wouldn't remember what you gave back to me so quickly and so I could go on and be a slayer because that what the powers that be want, warriors"
"That's not true, they want to see the good, the light to rule than the darkness" Angelus said.
"So why can't you stay and be my light, my sunlight" Buffy said "All I ever seem to do is be the slayer and fight the bad guys, well I'm tried of seeing the night sky Angelus I want to be able to see the sun and get a sun tan" she turned around to face the black crates "I'm twenty Angelus, I should be thinking about boys, make-up and other girl stuff but you know what I think instead? Fight tactic's, Armageddon and demons. Not exactly what dreams are made of and I've been this way since I was fifteen. Do you see a fifteen year old girl doing this and surviving into her thirties, forties and fifties? Let alone have children?"
"You will have kids Buffy" Angelus said immediately.
"My life won't allow it, I don't really see hunting demons is a great way of making babies" Buffy said "Why do you think I want you to be with me? I don't want to be alone Angelus, no man can be with me without being constant danger, just look what happen to Riley? He stayed and was killed by those devil and Scott and Owen both dead because they loved me. I'm afraid that if I fall in-love with some guy he'll die because of me and with you I know that won't happen because I know you'll be safe and I really care about you. I want to be with you always and when I die I want you to be there to take me were I should go"
"I won't leave you" Angelus said she felt Angelus wrapped his strong arms around her tenderly, nuzzling his head against her neck and kissed it a couple of times "Even when I should, I won't"
"Won't go nowhere. Promise?" Buffy asked, basking in his warmth leaning into him.
"Always" he softly said and kissed the top of her head.
"Lies, lies, lies" Tara said "Why can't you ever admit it Willow? Or do like be spiteful to others?"
"I'm not-"
"You are" Tara said "Always have been, always will be"
"Your wrong" Willow shouted "I'm not spiteful, I'm not a bitch, I didn't leave to you so Adam could have you it was purely coincidental that he came after I left"
"I didn't say that"
"But you would have, what happened to Tara? I love you and I know you love me too" Willow said "So why are you doing this? I haven't done anything to you"
"Denial, why does everyone go for that?" Tara said, tsking Willow all the same "and you have Willow"
"No I have not" Willow bellowed back.
"Developing some backbone now Willow? I wonder why, have I cornered you because I'm close?" Tara said "Close to the truth?"
"You manipulative pyscho!" Willow shouted, she had enough "You are far from it, I left you so I go to Giles to see our spell was right but seeing as I had no ride I ask if Oz would give me and so he did and when we came back with Giles you were gone and you had disappeared and turned up at my door dead two days later. Do you know how upset I was when you died? I cried for three straight days, I didn't eat or sleep"
"More lies" Tara barked.
"But that's the truth!" Willow shouted.
"You know I think I should do something about your lying" Tara said "Something that would shut you up permanently, like maybe killing the thing that killed me"
A blast of light filled the entire Magic Box as Doyle and Gunn appeared and light disappeared returning the Magic Box to it's natural state.
"DOYLE!" Cordelia shouted, ran and jumped into Doyle's arms to deliver several kisses on his cheeks.
"Wow maybe I should visit the underworld more often" Doyle with a cheeky smile only get a wallop from Cordelia.
"Don't you dare!" Cordelia growled.
"Did you find anything?" Giles asked, getting up from the pile of research.
"Melaina doesn't know a thing about Tara but some whacked up devil called Darla has been very interested to get into Willows dreams and nightmares" Gunn said.
"That's not necessarily good news" Giles stated.
"Yeah but it is helpful" Gunn said "And get this the First put a bounty on Buffy's dead fiancé because it believed he was her soul mate"
"The First thought Riley was my soul mate?" Buffy said as she came back in with a black crate while carried Angelus its twin.
"Yep, but apparently Riley's not" Doyle said "The furies say your soul mate is still out there and when you two join together the First is goin' into be in real trouble. Otherwise it wouldn't have bothered to try to kill Riley off"
"So what happens when my soul mate and I get together?" Buffy asked.
"Well we have two options" Doyle said "One you become really strong"
"And two?" Buffy asked.
"Two, well, you'd get pregnant" Doyle said.
Buffy nearly dropped the crate she was holding. Pregnant? How could she get pregnant? She was twenty, barely in university and she was the Slayer that entitle no normality!
"Pre-pregnant?" Buffy managed to say.
"Well either those two would do" Doyle said.
"So either I kick the First ass or my kid when I meet up with mr soul-man" Buffy said then a thought went through her head "It is a guy soul-mate?"
"Don't worry lass, soul mates are physically opposites yet the same in each others eyes" Doyle said "You know man to woman, quiet to loud, brown to blue eyes and so on"
The scoobie gang looked over to Angelus. Buffy had light hair, light eyes and smaller than them all and Angelus was opposite, dark hair, dark eyes and taller than all of them. Hmm, was this a coincidence or not? They weren't sure.
"Err we both ruled Angelus out considering us angels can't exactly get non-angels pregnant" Gunn pointed out "and have you felt any stronger Buffy?"
"No, but I feel safer when Angelus is around" Buffy confessed.
Angelus looked away, a little embarrassed by that. He wasn't used to open affection. But as Angelus looked over to Buffy he could see her belly round, protruding announcing she was carrying a precious life within her body. A baby. A beautiful baby. A beautiful baby girl. That baby girl he told her about before they had their first kiss. He wanted Buffy to have that baby and that baby girl to be his.
Wait did I just thought that? Angelus thought.
But then again every man envisioned their lover to have their child, there was no denying it Angelus wanted to be the father of Buffy children. It was a shame that he couldn't, but one could dream could they?
"So what have you lot found?" Doyle asked.
"Nothing that could help Willow but Buffy and Angelus had stopped a gang of vampires stealing this" Giles said and presenting the key to Doyle and Gunn "It's a key for something and the Hellgod wants it seeing the vampires bared her crest and so did the container of it with a warning about the Key"
"Whatever that hellgod wants it must be really dangerous" Doyle said.
"No shit" Gunn said
"Kill what?" Willow asked,dreading the answer.
"Oh it has a problem three nights in a month" Tara smiled.
"Don't you dare hurt Oz!" Willow said.
Oz came through the door that moment, he told Xander to go to the Magic Box and do some more research on Willow problem. He looked over to Willow and noticed something he didn't want to see. She was looking at him like he was the most evilest thing in the world. But to an onlooker it looked like Tara was in the exact place Oz was, hiding him from Willow.
"Willow it's me" Oz said
"Oh but wolf boy would be so much fun to kill" Tara said and as Oz took a step towards Willow so did Tara.
Willow instantly made black electricity dance around her hands as her eyes turned jet black. She was mad and if anyone going to kill Oz she was going to kill them first.
"Stay away from me" Willow growled.
"Willow it's me Oz" Oz said "What's wrong?"
"What are going to do? Kill me?" Tara said "I'm already dead, so I think I have an advantage"
"Willow Tara doing this, please just ignore her" Oz said.
"You don't have anything" Willow said.
"Oh Willow I can hear Ozzy, mind if I talked to him?" Tara said in a sing-song voice and before Willow could answer Tara a made a move to the door.
At that Willow blasted her magic into Tara but Tara was no longer there. To her horror Oz looked at her with shock and pain. Her hands came to her mouth when she stopped, alarmed at what she did. She used her deadliest magic on Oz, her boyfriend, her lover and the gentlest soul to be seen. He collapsed onto the floor with Willow by his side, kneeling beside in pain. She howled in pure misery as Oz laid there dying.
"Oz please don't die!" Willow whispered against his chest "Please someone help me! Oh goddess please someone help. Don't die baby, please. Please don't die Oz"
"See Willow" Tara said standing in front of her "If you loved me, truly loved me, you would have gone after the son of a bitch that killed me" she smiled "But the thing that makes me smile, your no different than all the uglies you've faced" with an echoing cackling laugh Tara left.
Willow couldn't help but screamed to the heavens of what she did "OOOOOOOOOOOOZZZZZZZZZ!"
Cliff-hanger, man you either love 'em or hate 'em. Same with marmite. YUCK! Anyway what did you guys think of this chapter? Give me the reason to write on and I will.
Sorry I didn't post the fact I was to be going to be in Antigua, a lovely Caribbean island, for two weeks but while I was there I had inspiration to write more and to give you folks different stories. As they say in Antigua 'take it easy' and so I did and I'm ready to deliver you more of my Bufftomania world note: not actually the owner of Buffy but it's my version of Buffy! Ha! Eat that you sueing maniacs!
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