"If I Could Melt Your Heart" by Redcandle17
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters and elements from the Harry Potter series belong to J.K. Rowling. No copyright infringement is intended.
After entering the castle, Alicia went to Moaning Myrtle's bathroom on the second floor. She couldn't go back to Gryffindor Tower looking the way she did. She studied her reflection in the mirror, trying to ignore Mrytle, who hovered behind her. Her hair was a mess, her lips were swollen, and there were budding bruises on her neck. Her flushed face could be blamed on the difference between the cold outside and the heat in the castle. But the rest had to be fixed before she saw anyone she knew.
"You've been a naughty girl," Myrtle said. She giggled. "Tell Myrtle all about it."
Alicia splashed her face with cold water, then set about combing her hair with her fingers. By the time she sprinkled it with water and twisted it around a bit, there weren't any signs that someone had been playing with her hair. There was nothing she could do about her lips. As for the marks on her neck, well, thank Merlin for simple healing charms.
She couldn't believe what she'd just done. It had been the most thrilling experience of her life. In addition to the physical pleasure, the knowledge that she was with someone her friends wouldn't approve of had been exciting. She couldn't wait to do it again.
By morning however, Alicia's view on the matter had changed. Oh, her friends hadn't suspected anything, though they still teased her about alledged crush on Warrington. A new thought had occurred to her. What if Cassius told the other Slytherins? She couldn't bear being the target of their knowing smirks and their pointed comments. Not to mention that her friends would notice such behavior and figure out what it meant.
At breakfast, while she tried to avoid looking at the Slytherin table, an owl delivered a rolled piece of parchment to her. She shoved the note in her bag, unable to open it. I should burn it and forget about this entire thing. When George asked her about it, she claimed it was a letter from home.
During Potions class, the only class she had with Cassius, she dropped a vial of Sleeping Draught when he looked at her. The five points Snape took from Gryffindor House added to her misery. Kenneth Towler, the only other Gryffindor in the class besides Angelina glared at her. She was too nervous too glare back at him.
"Are you okay?" Angelina whispered to her, glowering at Kenneth in her defense.
"I'm fine," Alicia lied. She had to be more careful. There was no point in worrying about people finding out about IT then making them suspicious with her own behavior. She had to control herself. Calm down. She glanced at Cassius resentfully. If he was nervous about anything, it certainly wasn't showing.
When Angelina went to the supply cupboard, Alicia pulled the note out of her bag and quickly unfolded it. It was one line, informing her that he would be waiting in the unused third floor corridor at eight thirty. It was signed with his initials. Well, it's not like I was expecting a love letter anyway.
Alicia told herself that she wouldn't go, that it was a huge mistake, right up until the moment she left the Gryffindor common room. Then she told herself that she was only going to tell him to forget the entire idea, that it was only polite to tell him in person rather than owl him. But then she saw him waiting there and she told herself just one more time.
It was addictive, this wrongness that felt so right. She lost herself in the heat radiating from his body as he pressed her back against the cold stone walls, in the kisses that were just rough enough to remind her that he was a Slytherin. She could only force herself to break away from him when she felt his hand slide beneath her skirt and up her thighs.
"No," she said. "We're not going there."
Cassius placed his hands on the wall behind her and stared at her silently.
God, I'm in trouble. She closed her eyes so she wouldn't have to see the look in his.
Finally he spoke. "What are we doing here, Alicia?"
Oh, God, oh God, oh God. Her name had never sounded so sexy before. She would have been better off having him call her 'Spinnet.'
Alicia opened her eyes, because with them closed her world was reduced to the sound of his breathing. He shouldn't sound sexy when he's not even saying anything. "No sex."
"How about your knickers stay on, but everything else is fair game?"
She felt herself blush at the mental image his words had conjured. I can't do THAT. I shouldn't even want to. She should say 'no' and walk away. She shouldn't ever met him alone in a dark place again. She should, but she couldn't. "Yes," she whispered breathlessly.
"Good," Cassius replied, still staring intently at her.
Alicia gripped a handful of his dark hair and pulled his head down for a kiss.
It took a week before Angelina and Katie noticed Alicia's absences. She was careful, and she didn't go to Cassius every day, but it's impossible to hide an affair from your best friends when you lived with them. They confronted her together in the Sixth Year's girls dormitory while Patricia Stimpson studied down in the common room.
"Who is it?" Katie asked.
Angelina was more direct. "It's Warrington, isn't it?"
"No! Of course not," Alicia said, outraged. Yes, she was having an affair with a Slytherin, but she was still upset that they thought she'd do such a thing. You are a hypocrite.
"I understand, Alicia," Angelina said gently. "I want to, and I'm sure Katie has wanted to." She paused to look at Katie, who nodded in agreement. "But it's a terrible idea. Think of your reputation. If anyone found out..."
"They won't!" Alicia interupted her. "Because there's nothing to find out."
"Is he a good kisser? I've always wondered..." Katie stopped talking after Angelina glared at her.
"Don't encourage her," Angelina said. "You were smart enough not to do anything with Flint; she should be, too."
"I didn't do anything with Flint because he was four years older than me and probably had no interest in a flat-chested fourteen year old!" Katie snapped in annoyance. "Relax Angelina. Let Alicia have her fun."
"Thank you both," Alicia said icily. "But your concern is misplaced, Angelina. And, Katie, I don't need your permission."
Katie's mouth fell open and she put her hands on her hips. "Me? What have I done? I'm on your side, Alicia. Don't snap at me."
By dinner Lee and the twins had noticed that the three girls were not talking to each other. They tried jokes, teasing questions, and then serious concern. All this earned them were looks of feminine annoyance.
Alicia was in a very bad mood when she met Cassius in their usual spot.
"What's wrong?" he asked her, leaning against the wall in a casual pose.
"Like you care."
Cassius sighed in disgust. "Gryffindors!"
"This is all your fault," Alicia said abruptly. "If you hadn't been fucking with my mind last week, I wouldn't have told Angelina and Katie anything."
"Your mind, my darling, is not want I want to fuck with. Either go back to Gryffindor Tower and continue your fight with your friends, or shut up and..."
Alicia gasped. "Don't tell me to shut up!" The nerve of him, the Slytherin bastard.
"You're wasting time. I'm supposed to be on Prefect patrol."
"I wouldn't want to waste more of your time," Alicia said coldly. She turned and began storming away.
"That's not what I meant," Cassius called. "Come back here."
Alicia kept walking.
Potions class the following day was agonizing for Alicia. She ignored both Angelina and Cassius - except for the occasional peeks to confirm that they were ignoring her as well.
By mid-day Alicia admitted to herself that she'd been a bitch. Angelina was right to be worried about her, and Katie had only been trying to support her.
"I'm sorry," she said, as soon as they all sat down for lunch.
Katie hugged her.
Angelina didn't accept the apology until dinner, and then she wanted Alicia to promise not to "do anything stupid."
"I promise," Alicia said. I'm not lying. I'm not doing anything I can't handle.
However, Alicia's pride refused to let her apologize to a Slytherin. And she wasn't sure she needed to. He told me to shut up and stop wasting his time. He should apologize to me. But her body missed him very much. After nearly a week, she was willing to forget about the incident without apologies on either side.
She was about to leave the library and go in search of Cassius when a Sixth Year Ravenclaw boy sat beside her and smiled. Alicia frowned at him, her thoughts focused on Cassius.
The boy's smile faded. "So, Alicia, I wanted to ask you...but if you're busy, I'll go..."
Alicia tried to remember his name. Matthew Taylor, that was it. "No, no. It's okay, Matt. What did you want to ask me?"
She couldn't be sure, but she thought he was blushing. "Do you want to go into Hogsmeade this weekend? With me, I mean."
Oh. This presented a dilemna. It wasn't like she and Cassius were dating, but it still didn't seem right to go out with someone else. On the other hand, he was nice, smart, and very good looking. And her friends would love him. Alicia never knew what she would have decided to do if Cassius hadn't entered the library at that very moment.
He saw her with Matt and his expression darkened before going blank. Looking away from her, he headed to a table at the other end of the library.
"I'm really flattered, and I'm really, really sorry, but I'm not feeling sociable at the moment. I'm sorry. I'm just...trust me, you don't want to go anywhere with me. I'd be terrible company." Alicia kept her gaze on Matt as she spoke, fighting the urge to stare at Cassius.
"It's okay. I understand," said Matt, bravely trying to smile. "I'll see you around, okay?" He stood and started walking away.
"Okay. Maybe some other time," Alicia said. I'm a bad person. I'm lower than...than a Death Eater! I can't believe I hurt the feelings of such a great guy for Cassius's sake. The Slytherin bastard doesn't deserve it.
Despite her self-admonition, as soon as Matt was out of sight, she went to Cassius. She didn't know what to say, so she just sat there and glared at him.
Finally, Cassius looked up from his homework. "You and that mudblood seemed quite close," he commented.
"Don't call him that!" Alicia hissed, leaning forward angrily. "I won't tolerate that kind of language in my presence."
Cassius leaned forward, too. The table between them suddenly seemed much smaller. "Don't defile yourself with a...with one of that kind."
"And who are you to tell me who I can and can't date?"
"That's a question for you to answer, Alicia. I'm not sure where we are since you childishly accused me ruining your friendships and stormed away last week."
She hated herself for being so affected by his mere proximity to her. She hated herself more for wanting him despite knowing what a bigoted pureblood supremacist he was. She hated him, too. But she was still one second away from throwing herself into his lap.
"What are your plans for this weekend?" she asked.
"Like everyone else, I was going to go to Hogsmeade." He smirked. "Why, do you want to go to Madam Pudifoot's like a normal couple?"
"Yes," Alicia said.
The smirk disappeared, replaced by a look of wariness. "There'll be gossip."
"I can handle gossip." Alicia directed her own smirk at him. "Afraid I'll ruin your reputation?"
"I was thinking about yours," Cassius replied.
Her former worry over whether he told his friends about their assignations was replaced by hurt at the thought of being his dirty little secret. She stopped herself before she snapped at him. Alicia was aware that she was being irrational and unfair. Then again, this entire affair was irrational.
"The Hog's Head, then?" she suggested.
"Fine. Now, I do believe we have one week's worth of snogging to make up for..." He touched her lips with his fingertips.
Alicia muffled her moan and shot to her feet. They couldn't start this in public. "I''ll meet you in the usual place in a couple of minutes." She had no doubt that he would follow her. This relationship might be irrational, but it was irresistible and oh-so-satisfying.