Chapter nine
Four days ago she had flew. It was really hard to believe, as most of her anxiety still stimulated at the thought. Clarisse looked out the far windows of her office, pondering a walk to calm her nerves.
Joseph was up to something, again. Four days ago it had been, and not a word of when he planned another little 'lesson'. It bothered her more with each passing minute, and she finally swore to back him into a corner this very day and inquire. Backing him in a corner wasn't such a bad idea, whether she got information or not.
Clarisse still felt his hands on her body from the last night he had spent with her. She smiled slightly, trying not to draw attention to herself, as she was not at all alone today. Her office had been the site of a steady stream of traffic since the early morning hours. She must keep her cool. Thinking of him would do nothing for that. The slight blush across her face was evidence to that.
"Prime Minister Motaz is on his way, Your Majesty," Charlotte interrupted her from her daydream. "He should be here within the next fifteen minutes."
"Oh, yes, thank you Charlotte," she answered. Leaning back into her leather chair, she watched her new aide shuffle papers along her desk, properly placing them in just the right place. She felt so good about having Charlotte, and must remember to thank Joseph for finding her. 'Always looking out for me,' she thought. "Charlotte, I wanted to tell you that I am impressed with your skills," Clarisse sat erect again, leaning toward the young lady, "And I also wanted to thank you for arranging this mess I had to some kind of order again. It is wonderful to have you here, and I hope you'll stay." She slipped off her glasses and placed them in front of her, noticing the shy smile on her assistants face.
"I'm honored, Your Majesty. Thank you, and I do like working with you very much." Charlotte could hardly finish sorting the files and various papers now, as a slight trembling found its way to her hands.
Clarisse reached out and placed her own hand upon her assistants. "It's okay Charlotte," she winked, "With time, you'll find yourself very comfortable here."
"I do hope so," she answered, a little embarrassed.
"Everyone who has ever worked here found themselves to be a little nervous at first...well, except for Joseph, who made himself at home from day one," she added at seeing Joseph stroll in and help himself to her tea.
Charlotte couldn't help but giggle. The laughter helped to ease her soul, and her hands steadied.
"Charlotte, if ever you need a lesson on how to feel at ease here, please see Joseph." Clarisse watched as Joseph now pulled up a seat beside her, and let himself fall into it.
"Charlotte if Her Majesty ever intimidates you, I'll gladly give you lessons on how to overcome it, and her." Joseph smiled and winked at Charlotte, who was now enjoying this little moment.
"Thank you both, but I have work to do." Charlotte excused herself, figuring she had enough to laugh over at the moment. It did help, and she took a deep breath as she left the office she was beginning to know very well.
"When have I ever intimidated anyone?" Clarisse asked.
"When you are cranky, you have a habit of doing that to everyone. Such as the morning you had laser surgery done on that," he pointed to the faint line that was the trace of the scar left on her arm.
"I was not..." She firmly stated.
"You were. Would you consider a short flight on Monday?" Joseph thought it best just to get to the point. He knew she would be in turmoil over when the next one would be.
"What did you say?" She eyed him as he finished her tea. A steady coldness filled her body quickly, though she had already been in the air once.
"You heard me. Just a short flight, maybe just circle the tarmac, and land again. I promise." Joseph tried to keep his voice down, careful that no one hear who didn't need to.
"I, ah.."
"Good then. Monday it is, unless the weekend is better?"
"I, ah.."
"Then think about it, and let me know. I have work to get back to." Joseph rose and left.
He just left her there, her mouth still parting, and her mind buzzing with words that she could not, for one reason or another, put in order to make a sensible sentence.
Her eyes scanned the room, which now held a chill for her. The two guards by her door and the one maid seemed to have heard nothing. If they did, they kept to themselves. Maybe it was paranoia on her part, after all her mental stability lately had not been so stable. It was this whole flying nonsense that made sure of that. It captured her mind every minute of every day, and often into the night when it would leave her sleepless. At times it seemed as though it would consume her. Yet, when she was with Joseph, she felt the sickening feeling loosen its hold on her, and for brief periods she would be free. It made no sense, for the last time she had felt so free she had been in the air.
"Charlotte," she held down the intercom button that connected with Charlotte, "Inform Joseph that I'd like to go tomorrow." As soon as her finger lifted off, Clarisse had already regretted it. Yet she stood firm in her decision, and with much deep breathing and self-support, she withheld from canceling. She had to, it was time for her take a little of the responsibility of her own anxiety. Besides, with each step, Joseph was taking their relationship back into the depths of passion that had healed her heart. Now she needed, and wanted, for it to heal her soul.
"Clarisse," he called again, trying not to arouse any attention.
"OH, Sebastian, I do apologize," she began as he held up his hand, both to quiet and subdue her voice.
"No need to apologize to myself, Clarisse. I know how heavy your shoulders are. I came by to just confirm with you on my trip tomorrow to London."
"I'm so sorry you have to keep..."
"Clarisse, no more. Now, the legal documents have all been signed?"
"Yes, Charlotte will hand them to you on your way out. Everything is in order, and I foresee no problems." Clarisse was clearly uneasy. Sebastian Motaz had been going beyond his duty these past months. All because of her fears.
"There will be trouble," Sebastian began to explain. "Mabrey is going to be there. He'll do his best to take this whole policy apart. If there's money to be gained, he'll make sure he's right in the middle of it." He dropped the finger he had been pointing with, and let out a breath. He had said it.
"Damn. Are you sure?"
"Clarisse, are you blind as well? He will be there."
She rested her head on her hand, as if a sudden headache had given her a weakness. She knew he was right. 'Mabrey, I could deal with him, if I were there,' she thought. The idea faded when reality set back in. She wouldn't be there. She could not just fly to London. Mabrey had always been slightly afraid of her. A fear she often used against him. She could thank Rupert for that. That was just another aspect of her reign that he had taken care of before his death.
"If it's possible, Clarisse, I do have a suggestion." Sebastian pulled her again out of thought. As she looked up at him, she motioned with her hands to continue. "You cannot be there, however we can intimidate him."
"How?"
"The one person Mabrey is more afraid of than yourself." He paused for a moment. "Joseph. Send Joseph with me. I'll make sure he's at my side the entire time. Mabrey will not be so arrogant as to cause a riot with Joseph present. He'll be a constant reminder of yourself. He'll know he can't win."
"You believe Joseph's presence will stop him?" She knew Joseph was her backbone, and had been for years. Mabrey knew that as well. Joseph was not someone to cross. "Then so be it. I'll inform Joseph of the situation, and he'll meet you at the airport in the morning."
"You can do without him?"
"It's just for the day, is it not?"
"Of course."
"I see nothing preventing him from going."
"It'll give us an edge, Clarisse. Joseph is feared by far more than just Mabrey," Sebastian added, rising from his chair to leave.
"Charlotte, you heard all that?" She turned to her assistant who had been standing by the door with a thick, wide, brown folder in her hands.
"Yes, ma'am. The documents," she presented, "and I'll inform Joseph right away."
Sebastian nodded his approval of the lady as he accepted the folder. Indeed, she was a blessing.
Don't think you're getting away from the inevitable," he whispered against her ear between kisses. "I am more than just eager to get you in the air, Clarisse Renaldi."
Joseph pressed himself against her, pulling her to him. To just 'miss her' was more than an understatement. His body had been longing for her, and now it would be another day without her. His hands explored her figure, and moulded it to his memory. Her lips pressed solidly to his, and Joseph battled with her for sanity to leave the world, and them behind. How could he even think of being sane when he was so close to her?
"It's just for one day. You should be back by tonight," she whispered. "Tomorrow is another day." She pulled away slightly. "I'm not eager to fly, you know that. I am eager for you..."
"I know. So am I. Soon. I promise you, soon." With one last kiss, he left her alone. More alone than she had felt for some time.
She cuddled up, still in bed, and watched the light from the morning sun begin to peak in. He had said 'soon'. How soon? Just when? The questions or answers themselves didn't matter any. They were just a precursor to the anxiety that was setting in once more. Why did she even give herself time to think?
She traced the faint line down her arm. Indeed, it was almost invisible. It looked more like an indention than a scar. That didn't matter either. What did matter was that she could live with it now. Clarisse felt easy with that bit of promise. If all scars could be coped with that easily...