Chapter XV
The Patronus
((James's POV))
It was to the point where I was angry with her. Why wouldn't she just spare me one conversation, where I could explain that I was planning on registering myself as soon as I got out of school? I could explain that Remus needed this, and that the rest of the Marauders, as loyal friends, would do anything to help one another.
But no. Stubborn-ass Lily had to ignore me completely. Normally I would have tried talking to her on nighttime patrols, but she would only hurt me. And then I would have to miss Quidditch practice. And then Gryffindor would lose all chances of winning the Cup.
Now I knew she didn't love me. Before, there had been a ray of hope that she felt the same way about me as I did about her. But, if she had loved me, she would listen to my side of the story.
"The last time I saw you like this was when I turned your hair purple on April Fool's Day in fourth year," Sirius commented as we studied in the common room in the beginning of April. "Or was that this year…"
"It was fourth year," Remus assured him.
"Anyway," he continued. "Prongs, it is a wide world out there." Sirius sat back in his seat and spread his arms. "Take it from someone who knows all about it…"
Remus snorted. "You know as much about the world as you know about girls' feelings."
"One, Moony, I know a lot about the world, due to the fact that the whole lot of my family are Voldemort-lickers," Sirius said. "And two, how dare you insult my knowledge of the feminine brain? I know all there is to know about girls' feelings."
His current girlfriend, who was in Gryffindor, came forward and sat in his lap.
"Will you take me to the kitchens so we can get some butterbeer, Sirius?" she asked sweetly. "I don't know the way."
He gave her a look like she had just asked him to dance with the giant squid wearing only a sparkly pink tutu. "No. Bug off, Gretchen."
She got up and left, pouting.
"As I was saying," he continued, unruffled, "girls love my sense of style."
"Especially Gretchen," said Peter, and they looked over at the crying girl on the sofa and her friend, who was patting her on the back and speaking words of comfort.
"She has ugly shoes, anyway," Sirius said. "Although, they do cover up her ugly feet."
"Her feet?" Peter asked. "They aren't ugly."
"They're too big," Sirius insisted. "And don't' start judging people's feet, Wormtail. You could do with a bit of toenail clipping yourself."
James said tiredly, "How did we get from the topic of my depression to Wormtail's feet?"
"Well," Remus began, "we were talking about your depression, and then Sirius started trying to give you advice, saying it was a wide world out there." He paused. "And then I told him he knows as much about the world as he knows about girls. And then he insisted he knows a lot about girls. And then Gretchen came up, and he pretty much just ended their relationship. And then he said her feet are ugly. And now he just told Wormtail that his feet are ugly."
"You talk too much, Moony," Sirius informed him.
"I'm going to go patrol with Lily," I announced, leaving them sitting there.
((Lily's POV))
The days were heating up, though faintly; students started sitting out on the lawns to study for exams, bringing with them only jackets.
James and I still weren't speaking. He didn't even bother trying to talk to me anymore.
Rose was quizzing Pansy and me on Defense spells.
"The incantation for creating a Patronus, Lily?" Rose asked as we studied on the lawns one Sunday afternoon in mid-April.
"Expecto Patronum," I replied lazily, flipping through my Potions textbook.
"And it does what, exactly?" she asked.
"It will ward away Dementors," I said. "It can also be used as a communication tool."
She nodded. "Perform it."
I stood up and raised my wand, thinking of the happiest moment of my life. All that came to mind was my first day at Hogwarts.
It would have to do. I raised my wand.
"Expecto Patronum!" Some silver mist jetted out of my wand.
"Rotten luck," said Pansy, saying the incantation and watching an even feebler silver mist come out of her wand.
"Just try it again, Lily," Rose said. "You're the Charms wiz, after all."
"Expecto Patronum!" The jet of silver was even less powerful than before.
"You have to learn this by the time we take our N.E.W.T.s," Rose said. "Keep trying."
I tried several more times, but the silver gas erupting from my wand barely gained form.
"I couldn't do it in class on Friday, either," I said, gritting my teeth.
I could tell that James, under the shade of another tree, was pretending to have his head buried in his Defense book, but he was watching out of the corner of his eye.
I raised my wand a last time, thinking of something else that had made me happier.
And my mind was filled with Valentine's Day, when James kissed me for the first time.
"Expecto Patronum!" I shouted. A four-legged creature seemed to leap out of the end of my wand, and it began prancing around the area for everyone to see. Several people began clapping. When I saw it, my heart skipped a beat. The other three Marauders began whispering to each other behind their hands. I saw James look up and watch the Patronus, and then his eyes locked with mine.
The doe vanished in a wisp of silver.
A/N: Yay! Another chapter! I was proud of this one. I feel that Lily's Patronus is significant. And this is the third time I've written this author's note because my document keeps deciding to close out while I'm still typing it. I'm hoping it doesn't do it again.
Fairy-GYAKUTENNO-MEGAMI: Of course they'll get back together. I don't feel that I shouldn't admit this, because a.) where else would Harry come from, and b.) this isa James/Lily fic. It's inevitable.
Kacijo: Yeah, I don't read anything I don't ship. Because if I read, oh, Hermione/Draco or slash, I'd probably want to eat a Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Bean andvomit all over myself after doing so. And then I might go lick Voldemort or put on only a pink tutu and go dance with Grawp.
Vanessa: This review distresses me. I wrote that so that it said, in other words: "Pansy was a pretty girl, one of her flaws being that she had acne." The fact that she had acne did not mean she was ugly. Everyone has their flaws. Many of my friends have acne, and they are very pretty. If you reviewed only to tell me that, you wasted your time. I don't think you plan to read anymore of this fic, you don't plan to read my response, and you only expect me to read that review and ponder it. On the other hand, I would like to discuss it with you, if it hurts your feelings, and perhaps I would edit it out for you. I will not only because you made that comment.However, if you read more and review for me again, I'd be happy to edit it for you. Like I said, acne is not horrendous, and I am sure that you are a very beautiful person, whether inside or out. Nobody is perfect, and I was simply pointing out Pansy's flaw. I am sorry that I have hurt your feelings. :)