A/N: Hello everyone! And yes, I know, it's been forever, literally…geez, I don't remember the last time I updated with this story! And I feel awful, but I was literally road blocked! I couldn't think and didn't ever feel like writing. Well, imagine my surprise when I'm trying to sleep and I start dreaming up the next chapter for my story…well obviously I woke up and wrote them down, and then I wrote for an hour! Well, what do ya know…miracles DO happen! Hope it's fabulous!

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon

Chapter 3(so excited to write that): Inner Struggles

(Darien's apt)

"Huh!" Darien gasped as he sat up in a cold sweat, taking deep breaths as he looked around his dark apartment. His heart beating fast, pounding against his body. He leaned his head into his hands as his heart ached for her, needed her, wanted her…but, he wouldn't, he couldn't have her.

He could feel it, feel her. Feel her pain. He could hear the tears she cried every night as her heart broke repeatedly into smaller pieces, too small to pick up, too small to mend.

It never stopped, her suffering and it never would. And every night, as her painful cries echoed in his ears, he sat there, lost to her angelic voice as it lured him away, successfully taking a part of him with it.

He'd made her into the one thing he'd sworn to protect her from becoming; heartless, depressed, and full of pain. Every night he recounted all the choices he'd made and regretted every one of them; regretted everything he'd done to her.

But then that side of him spoke out defending his decision saying he was only doing this for her. He was protecting her. And every time he questioned this answer; this "reason" he had labeled it. Was that the reason he was doing this? Sure he was protecting Serena from getting physically hurt, but at what cost? Wasn't she hurting more mentally and emotionally now? Was he actually harming her more by protecting her?

Maybe it wasn't even about her, maybe it was all about him. He knew he couldn't bear to lose Serena, but hadn't he still lost her? What would happen if they were together? That evil woman would go after her, hurt her, even kill her, but wasn't Serena always saying that she'd rather die than be without him? Maybe it was a bit selfish by not allowing her to decide how she would live her life. I mean what's better…living a short life loving someone and being loved or a lifetime full of loneliness and pain a part from the one person you love?

This war raged on continuously in his mind and every night his rational side some how pulled through, convincing him once more that somehow it was the right choice.

Sooner or later he'd see that she was dying a slow and painful death. Bit by bit, piece by piece. The hurt, the loneliness, the emptiness she felt inside was killing her, stabbing at her, but would he realize it soon enough to save her?

"Ahhhhhhhh!" Darien screamed out in frustration as he pounded his fists into the bed. He threw the covers back as he stood up and started pacing in his room. Why Darien, why are you doing this? He grabbed his head as if attempting to pull her voice out, willing it to leave.

"Leave me alone", he shouted to his dark apartment, "I'm doing this for you! I have to!" He couldn't take it anymore, any of it! The looks, the questions, the tears…he stopped walking as he passed by the phone on his desk, an idea lingering in his mind. Would he dare?

Making a split second decision, Darien picked up the phone and dialed her number, his heart beating loudly in his chest. Minutes passed by with no answer, as he waited nervously for her to answer. He was about to hang up, when he heard a click as the ringing stopped.

"Hello?" Serena choked out, traces of crying apparent in her hoarse voice. Darien froze……………………

(Serena's room)

When would it end? she wondered. Why wouldn't her heart and body just let her give up already? Traces of tears stained her soft cheeks, as she rubbed her already reddened eyes. She felt so worn out, her body, her mind, all of it. All she wanted to do was relax and rest her body. She wished for all the months of stress and hurt to just wash away, to just leave her for one night's peaceful sleep.

"Ha", she laughed bitterly, like that would ever happen. It was such a heavy burden, something she didn't want to carry anymore. She'd gone and put herself out on the line, she'd fought so hard and long for him, but in the end it was just a waste of energy and time. She tried, given it her all, but it just came back and bit her in the ass.

Serena sighed, as she looked up, letting her eyes linger over a picture of her and Darien. But as tired as she was, as much as she wanted to give in, she couldn't. Something inside her wouldn't let her. And as much as she tried to deny that she didn't care anymore, she did. She knew she did. God, she just missed him so much. A lone tear, slid unnoticed down her face as the phone suddenly rang.

Serena jumped as the loud noise pierced through the eerie silence. She placed a hand upon her chest, trying to calm her heart as she quickly jumped out of bed.

She was about to pick up the phone when she paused, a thought lingering in her mind. She stood there like that in a sort of trance faraway from reality for a while, when Luna walked next to her hearing the phone.

"Serena? Serena!" Luna hissed quietly, trying to wake her from her reverie.

Serena blinked as she looked down at Luna questioningly when she noticed the phone still ringing. Quickly she picked it up, placing it next to her ear. "Hello?" she said uncertainly.

No answer, "hello", she repeated again confused at the silence on the other end. She was about to hang up when she heard someone breathing. She quietly listened, straining to hear some hint as to who the caller was, when an image flashed in front of her eyes.

"Darien?" she questioned, as she heard a gasp from the receiving end, "Darien! Talk to me! Please, answer me! Don't hang u—" She was cut off by the sound of the dial tone as it echoed inside her head. She stood there, a blank look upon her face as she slowly hung up the phone. She let her arm drop to her side as she walked over to her bed, gently sitting down.

"Serena?" Luna asked as she jumped onto the bed trying to read Serena's thoughts. Serena just sat there, staring out her window at the full moon. It's bright light shining through the night, illuminating the darkness. Some tears escaped down her face splashing onto her blanket, as she broke down once more on her bed, the pain stabbing at her heart again. That night she cried tears of red, red from the blood her heart now bled openly, her pain revealed for the entire world to see.

A/N: yes I know it's EXTREMELY short, but I thought I'd try and update w/e I could write ASAP! And since I've written so many other parts of the story, hopefully once I can write the beginning chapters to connect to those parts, updating will be a breeze…..one can only hope! D Review pleeeeez! They mean a lot!