Me: Well, hope you enjoyed the first chapter. This one will be better, I promise!

Eevee: Uh… Can I ask a question?

Me: Shoot.

Eevee: … Cross-Dressers?

Me: All will be explained.

Abbie: Do we even want to know?

Me: That's debatable. Anyway, I don't own Jak and Daxter. But it would be so damn awesome if I did.

Written To: Every Time I Look For You – Blink 182/ Blue and Yellow – The Used

Jak's commentary

"Speech"

"YELLING!"

'Thoughts'

((Me popping into the story to explain something or other.))

Song lyrics

So, we were stuck in the middle of the Wastelands, and we were all hung over. I had somehow managed to crash the hovercar, and none of us were going to try and repair while we were hung over. So, instead of doing the sensible thing and waiting to be picked up, we went off in search of something to eat or drink. That was when the trouble began.

And yes, you will get an explanation of the whole cross-dressers business.

"I swear, I am not touching another drop as long as I live." Torn sighed, rubbing his head.

"Eh, you'll take that back once we get our sorry asses back in Haven." Yes, even when he was hung over Jinx could be a wise guy.

"How much you willing to bet?"

"Fifty."

"Done!"

Jak shook his head, massaging his temples gently. "Will you two knock it off? There are more important things here than betting."

Jinx looked rather confused. "Name one."

"Oh, I don't know, food? Water?"

"Oh, that. Right."

Sig looked out over the wastelands, sighing. "Come on. We gotta find something to drink, or… you know what'll happen."

"Good call." Torn had removed one of his boots to shake the sand out of it, and was now hastily pulling it back on. The rest of the group got to their feet slowly, following the dogged wastelander as he set off. Torn ran after them as soon as he actually got his boot past his heat-swollen heel, using his weight to push it into a comfortable position on his foot. He slowed down to a reasonable pace as soon as he reached the group, trying to look as though nothing had happened, despite the odd look Daxter shot him.

The company wandered aimlessly for at least two hours before the winds began to pick up. Sig, the most experienced member of the group, was the only one concerned about this. The others simply told him to stop worrying and to keep going. This was their downfall.

Soon, the winds turned into a massive, full-scale desert storm, whipping the sand about. Shielding their eyes from the swirling dust, the group headed over to the wadi, where the cliff concealed a mall cave. Sig knew this area, although any further south and he would be horribly lost. Under his leadership, they managed to barely climb into the shelter provided by the cavern.

Torn collapsed to the ground, releasing a deep breath. "We all here?"

"Uh… What would you say if I said no?" Jinx sighed, looking around nervously.

"All right, who's – Oh, fuck." It had just hit Torn who was missing. The Demolition Duo weren't there.

"Come on, they can't be far!" Jinx yelled above the noise of the wind outside, before Sig stopped him.

"Are you mad? You'd have to be crazy to go out in that storm! Jak knows how to survive. He's probably safe."

Jinx took a brief look at the cave entrance before returning his gaze to Sig. "You'd better be right."

The trio weren't the only ones in the cavern. Four metal heads were watching them through piercing yellow eyes, concealing themselves in the darkness. Until…

"A-CHOO!"

"Wha - ? Damnit, did you have to do that?"

"It wasn't my fault! My nose tickled!"

"Eh, this happens every time we take you out on a mission…"

"What the crap?" Torn looked over to where the voices came from, only to see four pairs of glowing yellow eyes peering back. "Um… Sig? You do have Peacemaker with you, right?"

"…"

"…Right?"

"Well, I um…"

"Guh… Jinx, do you have anything?"

"Not even a grenade."

"Shit. Okay, let's assess the situation. We are stuck in a cave on the side of a dried-up river, Jak and Daxter are missing, and we are 'sharing' this place with four goddamn metal heads."

"Hey, we're not all that bad!" The metal head that sneezed piped up, looking indignant.

"Don't try it, Biter."

"Yeah, last time you said that Spectre got a round of ammo lodged in his tail!"

"I'm still bitter about that, y'know."

"Aw, shaddap."

There was a short silence as the quartet of metal heads looked over at the trio of humans. Biter was holding something that looked suspiciously like popcorn. "Keep arguing, we don't want to interrupt anything."

"Yeah this is getting good." Spectre agreed, nodding his head slowly.

Jinx sighed and looked back outside. "Come on, you two. The wind's dying down."

A third metal head, which was called Slash, cut him off. "And if you leave this cave, we will tear you limb from limb, and use your intestines as stockings."

There was a long, uncomfortable pause.

"…You wear stockings?"

"NOT THE POINT!"

Biter looked at Slash's hindquarters, to see a pair of stockings made of something that looked unnervingly like human flesh. "You know, I've been working with you for nine years, Slash, and I never noticed that you were a cross-dresser."

Me: Yup, that's Chapter Two done. Apologies for lack of witty ending note, but I'm tired. Please R & R!

NOTE: I have nothing against cross-dressers.