Inextricable
Chapter Two: Confessional

Ed + Winry
Post-Series (Anime)
Divergent Future, episode 27

Winry stood beside Trisha Elric's grave and wondered what to say. Her own parents had died so far away and so long ago. Her shameful secret was that she didn't remember them very well. A bit of laughter here. A smile and a hug there. All good memories, but distant and vague.

Trisha Elric she remembered, and it had been to her grave Winry had gone during all the long years she'd waited for Edward and Alphonse to finish their mad quest and come back home. When she'd followed them on their quest, she'd stopped first here to say goodbye and explain what she planned to do.

Now none of them were going to be here to visit Trisha-san, and she was afraid to ask her grandmother to take up the ritual. Pinako made occasional visits to the graveyard to put flowers on her son's and daughter-in-law's graves, but these visits were in memoriam, not in communion. She'd do that, though, at least. Flowers are better than no visits at all.

"I'm going to Central," she told Trisha-san, her voice a bit high with nerves. "Grannie is taking on a new apprentice, and she said it's time I set up my own shop." She gave a little laugh, remembering the conversation and the feeling of almost-betrayal that had gone through her at the thought of some other automail-mad youngster taking her place at Pinako's side.

"In Central, I can get more medical training, too," she continued. "So I can be of more use during installations. Grannie said there's only so much you can learn about that during apprenticeship. There aren't a lot of automail shops in Central..." Even though that's where the military hospital was. It was odd. Everyone healed up and went to Rush Valley, she supposed. But some came back; some stayed in the military; they'd need a mechanic. Ed needs a mechanic.

"Don't worry, though. I have money. Mother and Father were big savers and there was... after Ishbal..." She'd learned about that later. About Ishbal and what had really happened there. And about the settlement Grannie had eventually convinced the military to pay. "There's plenty of money," she finished, a bit lamely, she felt. But Trisha-san didn't need to know about what had happened more recently at Ishbal.

"There's enough to set up my own shop and get the business started. I'd hate to ask, but maybe Ed would even let me say I'm his mechanic. That would have to be good for business. Do you think he'd mind?"

Ed was famous or infamous or both, depending on who you talked to. Those who were afraid of him made Winry incredibly angry. Ed had only ever tried to help people. He'd taken the vow, "be thou for the people," so seriously. It wasn't his fault if the military messed things up sometimes.

"The train leaves in the morning, so I'll see Ed tomorrow. Al's in Hoyle now. I told you that, didn't I? That he's going to school to be a doctor? That's just so like him, isn't it? To want to help people. Just like his niisan."

"Ed seems lost," the letter from Gracia-san had said. "I'm not sure what to do to help him. He won't talk about what happened."

Winry felt lost, too. She'd always thought Ed and Al would come home after they'd achieved their goal. She knew, now, that this had been a naïve dream — a belief with no basis in reality. Ed had never talked about coming back to stay. "I mean, he burned the house down!" she exclaimed, then turned shocked eyes on the gravestone. She'd never told Trisha-san about that.

"I should have told you that ages ago," she breathed. "They didn't want the past pulling them back from their goal. Ed was so determined to save Al. To get his body back. He was so, so sorry about what happened when they tried..."

Sorry wasn't a big enough word to encompass what Ed felt about his failed attempt at human alchemy. Winry feared nothing would ever be enough. He'd achieved his goal, he'd saved Al, and he'd paid a colossal price to do it. It should be enough! Why doesn't he believe it's enough?

It bothered Winry that Ed stayed in the military. She knew it upset Pinako, too. "He's the one who should go to Hoyle," the woman had growled upon hearing the news. "With his genius, he could teach the next generation instead of staying a dog of the military."

"Do you think that someday he'll stop doing penance?" she asked in a whisper. "Do you think that someday he might let himself be happy?"

Trisha-san didn't reply, but this was part of the reason Winry talked to her. Sometimes just asking the hard questions was enough. Once she knew what the questions were, she could figure out the answers.

She knelt down and plucked a few leaves from the gravestone before setting down the flowers she'd brought. "Your favorites," she whispered. "I'll see you next time I'm in Rizembool. You know Grannie won't let me go too long between visits."

The sun was disappearing over the horizon as she came in the kitchen door, but Pinako didn't comment on her long absence. They ate supper in near-silence, and Winry excused herself early to finish packing. She'd packed trunks-full of things, but at first she'd only have a large and a small suitcase. She wanted to tell Ed in person what she planned.

Den pad-clanked into Winry's room and threw herself down onto the floor with a loud "whuff." Winry knelt beside her and scratched her ears and was rewarded with her closed-eyed expression of bliss. She'd miss her, but she needed to go. She needed to find her own life now. They'd all been trying for so long to fix the past. "Al's looking for his future, Den," she said. "It's time Ed and I did, too."