Open Your Eyes
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The silent plead of Cinderella,
Cinderella of the night
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As Robin stepped into Raven's flat's warm lobby, she let out a relieved sigh, grateful to be away from the cold outside and greeted the doorman.
Her flushed cheeks and ears throbbing a little because of the rise in temperature. It's only the end of October and the snow is so thick that it might take till February to find her keys when she dropped them outside her apartment while thinking of how to "come clean" with Amon.
The weight of anxiety on her heart has lightened a few on her way to work.
The bright, gleaming wonderland before her made her truly glad to be alive. She skipped from one sidewalk to another to find that perfect patch of snow, its surface perfectly unscathed and its white radiance blinding Robin if she stared at it too long.
It's impossible not to stare. The sadness always comes as seeing foot prints through a whole field of freshly fallen snow, the obvious scars stuck out like blood. Robin frowned wondering who would have the heart to soil such a work of art.
Though the joy of another piece of snow will make its appearance and cheer up the angel in red and black.
Before she knows it she was smiling and watching tirelessly the puffs of white vapor she made, marveling of their strange shape and beauty.
The shimmering white spirits flew out of Robin's delicate mouth and rose up to the heavens, to her the curls are imaginary fires, not for hunting witches but just for her.
Winter is Robin's favorite season; the white snow containing all the colours can in some incomprehensible way cover everything, making things perfect.
Robin knows that it sounds childish and hiding isn't the way to solve things, but winter is like a flawless real fantasy until spring awakens and things become not so serene.
Today is crucial, Robin's love for the season depends on Amon and it seems like for certain he will screw up.
Upon reaching the STN-J's office, the fading nervousness came back full force and slowly gnawed at Robin.
For some reason her knees felt weak and making it extremely hard to reach the cool marble elevator, touch the button "5", and walk through the glass doors.
The young witch closed her eyes for a brief prayer for courage though it seemed a little inappropriate.
On one hand she hoped the head hunter will not be there and give her an excuse from herself, but Robin is afraid that if she doesn't say it now, it will kill her.
Entering the simply but stylishly furnished office quiet except for the ever present clacking of the keyboard, Robin looked around for any abnormalities that might foretell her upcoming fate.
Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, Doujima draping over the red sofa and drooling at a new outfit on her fashion magazine; Sakaki is with Michael looking at something on the computer.
Every few second low whistles and coughs would flow from one end of the office to the other the end where Doujima is and she would roll her eyes and mutter something. Robin couldn't help but laugh at the little pattern and curious of the glances Doujima would throw at Sakaki.
Looking around finding the head hunter no where in sight, the hold on Robin's heart had lessened, letting it beat.
Heading to the small kitchen Robin decided to have some coffee first, hoping the caffeine will make this easier.
Alcohol seemed to be more effective but one there are no alcohol here and two being drunk will make a rather bad impression.
Shaking her head laughing at her self for being that desperate Robin clicked on the coffeemaker.
Leaning against the dark green countertop Robin watched the drops of coffee dripping into the pot, and sighed as each drop breaks up Robin's reflection in the dark liquid.
Amon is just like that, on day he came and broken up her peaceful and unknowing life, making everything harder.
"What's with the face?"
Karasuma walked in, her mug dangling on her finger with a smirk on her face, Robin didn't hear her coming in and jumped.
"Thinking about someone?"
Miho said in a sing-song voice, causing Robin to blush. Miho isn't all that much older than she is, but her usual serious, un-Doujima likeness made her like an older sister. Miho probably would be offended by this, but since she doesn't know, oh well.
"Oh, nothing,"
Robin pretended to rub her eyes and hide her beet-red cheeks, "I just haven't got much sleep last night, that's all"
It's true, actually, she didn't. Robin was so nervous, that she spend the whole night planning, not like she hasn't being doing that for a while now.
She first thought about how she'll tell him, after two hours being extremely frustrated with the uselessness of words Robin ended up running every scenario possible in her head, acceptance and rejection.
The latter scared her, wondering what she will do, how can she face him after this and work together everyday.
Guilt was what made Robin coward away from Amon before, whenever her mind wondered away to Amon Touko always seem to come out of no where, sending her away in shame.
Robin couldn't help but thinking that this is in a way betraying Touko, taking advantage of the woman to took her in so generously.
"Robin, Robin, you okay?"
Miho asked, a concerned look on her face, "You were spacing out. Are you okay?"
"Oh, sorry."
Apologized Robin, ashamed, she quickly poured herself a cup of boiling hot coffee and started sipping, just to give herself an excuse for not talking.
"Hmm, I wonder what it is,"
Miho mused, making Robin look up curiously at her sudden initiative to talk. Tapping a finger lightly on her chin Miho continued on,
"Zaizen just all of a sudden called Amon to his office and shut the door. He's never done that before, I mean if it's just about a hunt then there no need to do so, we are all hunters aren't we? There's something not right here."
Miho stared into the empty space beside Robin's left ear, but after a few seconds she shrugged it off and said,
"Well, we just have to wait for him to come out and if he wants to tell us, he will."
Jerking out of her trance-like state Miho looked at her watch and made a face.
"Oh, I have a whole pile of paperwork to do, see you later Robin."
She said with a smile and left with her coffee.
Robin frowned at Miho's news, what does Zaizen want from Amon that he must speak in secrecy? Sipping her coffee in the comforting silence as the interrupted nausea seeps back, reminding her of her dreaded task.
The soft clicking of the doorknob rang out, strucking Robin.
Oh, no!
Robin found herself panicking; all things that her very being is based on are crumbling down, burying her in despair and hope.
Putting down the coffee mug on the marble countertop with a crisp thud, Robin took a deep breathe and composing herself. Looking inside herself for doubts and finding none, Robin hurried out of the kitchen to meet Amon.
The constriction in Robin's chest tightened as she saw Amon walking out of Zaizen's office, as unreadable expression on his face.
It scared Robin, it's something she has never seen before, is it doubt? Amon's never wavering being is something that ensured Robin of her future, her stability in a cryptic reality.
Nevertheless she hurried up to him and called silently.
"Amon?"
The suddenness of Amon's reactions surprised Robin.
He turned back to look at her, his black trench coat swirling in the dead air, that peculiar expression still present.
Backing up to allow him space Robin looked at her feet and picking the right words in her head, the final result was:
"Amon, can I have a minute with you? I need to talk to you about something."
She asked timidly, so quiet she wasn't even sure if Amon had heard it.
Looking at Robin with a distant look in his eyes, Amon seems to be studying her from head to toe then glaring right in to her eyes, trying to find something deep within her, and him.
"Yes."
The emotionless reply came from another world, the small success and Amon's usual self allowed Robin to release the breath that she was holding for so long.
Stepping out in to the elevator area, away from preying eyes Robin stopped. Looking up from the floor she found Amon looking at her as well, the abnormal attention from her partner was unnerving, but somehow warming.
"I have given this a lot of thought," slowly Robin began to speak, trying hard not to stumble.
"You have been on my mind a lot ever since I've met you and… well, um, I just want to say," Robin paused, quickly glimpsed at Amon's face, he is looking at her alright, but something fleeting across his eyes confused Robin.
If she had knew what was going to happen a few second's later, she would have stopped right here.
But she closed her eyes and blurted it out, "I just want to say that I'm…in love with you." Squeezing her eyes shut Robin looked away, dreading her terrible fate. Nothing came, but Amon's distorted voice:
"Pardon, can you say that again? Sorry, I wasn't paying attention."
The odd flashback of one of her hunts came back to her at this moment.
It was a witch that possesses telekinesis power, a common gift. Amon and she had chased the witch in to a construction site. The witch had caused all the bricks and steel rods to fly their way, Amon was already unconscious, and the bricks are heading her way.
When the bricks struck her, it didn't hurt at all, but Robin knew the pain is coming, just delayed. Now is just the same, strangely it didn't hurt at all, but what Robin fears is the pain that's going to kill her later.
"Never mind, it's okay, I was just taking orders for lunch because I'm going out right now. What do you want?"
The simple lie came in a calm voice that surprised even herself, a soft smile bent her lips.
"No, nothing for me." Amon answered, and walked away.
Life goes on, that's what Robin's afraid of.
Spring is coming.