Guardians

Note: Ack! Has anyone ever told you the first week of school sucks? 'Cause it's totally true! Well, here's chapter 50, as soon as I could find the time to write it! Hope you enjoy!

Chapter Fifty (!): The Phone Call

Karmina stayed up late that night pondering what her guardian had said. She just didn't know what to do, and knew that she had to do something. The guest rooms in Kaiba's mansion were all very, very far from his office, and his bedroom, so there would be no talking to him tonight. She could hardly find the bathroom without getting lost in that place.

"It's going to take some getting used to, this whole… Seto's girlfriend business. I used to feel like that was what we had before, but now… I realize this is different."

"Of course it is."

"Seto... what are you doing here?"

He gave that little half smile that was still mostly a smirk and sat down next to her. "You're right about this being different from before. But one thing's still the same; I can't focus on work right now."

Karmina grinned broadly and slid her hand onto his.

"So why don't we go and do something?"

"What's there to do this late?"

He shrugged. "We could see a movie."

"Ah… too many people, Seto… Why don't we just take a walk and look at the stars? And… we do need to talk. About what Wingweaver said, I mean. We can't ignore it, because it's still there whether we're willing to admit it or not."

He rolled his eyes. "I honestly don't understand where she gets the idea that I care about her little world."

"But… regardless of whether you do or not, I do care. Wingweaver was my only friend for a very, very long time. I owe her for all the years she spent by my side when she could have been anywhere else."

"She said we didn't have to go back, but somehow I get the feeling that she isn't telling us the whole truth. I have too much to do to waste my time 'saving the world'."

"Seto… I really think this is important, and besides… what could reflecting, being honest, and trying to fix some of our wrongs hurt?"

He rolled his eyes again. "When you start on something, you just don't give up, do you?"

She shook her head. "No. So… what do you think we should do to 'resolve all that our hearts feel is undone'?"

"How would I know?"

She closed her eyes and looked back. "Well… I never told the orphanage lady how much I hated her…"

He snorted. "Somehow I don't think that would 'show that the darkness in your heart is less than other things'."

She smiled. "You're probably right. But I just thought of something."

Seto sighed and surprised her by kissing her cheek as he stood up. "I really do need to get back to work now. You should go to sleep."

She watched him go, her mind racing. She had to fix the mistakes she'd made… she knew that she did. And that started with Joey… everything in her life, all that she could remember, had began with Joey. He had been the first of so many things. The first thing she ever saw at her new school, the first person to be nice to her, the first boy she'd liked, and her first friend besides Wingweaver and Seto, who really had always been something different than a friend. He was also the first heart she ever broke, and probably the last.

Mai Valentine. Clearly, this was the person she needed to call. It was a bit late for that, but something told her to try it anyway. Taking the number Seto had found for her, she dialed it into the phone and held her breath.

"Hello?"

"Mai Valentine?"

"Yeah, who is this?"

"Um… okay, you don't know me… but you do know my friend."

"What do you want? Money?"

"No… I want Joey to be happy."

"Joey?"

Karmina could hear her tone soften and the sadness creeping into her voice. "So I… I take it that you… remember him?"

"How do you know Joey?"

"I… I'm Karmina. I'm a friend of his… and he, well… he's very sad about your leaving… I wanted to know why you did."

"I don't think that's any of your business. Karmina… that's the one who was making out with Kaiba. I don't want to be associated with a girl like you."

A girl like you. Just like that, it hit her how very much her life was going to change… had already changed. Before, she'd been lucky if people had even noticed that she existed, and now Mai didn't want to be associated with a girl like her. Rage welled inside of her, and she released it in her voice.

"A girl like me? And just what kind of girl do you think that is, Mai Valentine? Because certainly whatever is on your mind is wrong. You know nothing about me. And not matter what I am… I still know how to listen to my heart. I hear it in your voice that you still love him. Why would you turn your back on someone you love? That… is truly despicable."

There was silence on the other line for a moment, and then the sound of sobbing. "I was afraid, all right? I was afraid that he would reject me… because he deserves so much better."

She almost hung up right there. She didn't want to have to do this. Didn't want to talk to this insane woman. But she had to.

"He was… so heartbroken when you left… He cried and everything. And… now… he's lonely… He's very good at hiding it… most of the time, but… What I'm trying to say is… both of you would be happier if you would come back here… if you would be there for him, so that he could be there for you. Like… I am here for Seto… and I know he will always be here for me…"

There was again silence on the other line. "It isn't that simple… not for us."

Karmina sighed deeply. "No… but if it were… would it even be worth it? The thing about love is this; it isn't simple. And isn't that half the beauty of it? But one part of it is simple. Do you love him?"

"More than anything else."

"And he loves you. What else are you waiting for?"

She didn't answer. The line went dead, and Karmina stared at the phone, almost as numbly as when Seto had hung up on her. Why did people continue to do that?

She could only hope that Mai was going to tell Joey how she felt. She wanted so badly for him to be happy, and he wasn't, and it was all her fault.

She could feel her chest tighten, and knew that tears were going to fall. What should have been a beautiful time, the time she and Seto had together, was being turned into a duty, as always… being turned into an endless list of tasks that neither of them might ever complete.

She tried to choke back her tears, but they flowed as freely as ever. Her mouth moved frantically to find words for her feelings, but found that her resources were dry. There were no songs to describe exactly how she felt right at that very moment; there was just too much going on, too many conflicting emotions.

"Why can't love be simple?" She asked the air. "Why is it that when it should have become easier, it just got harder? And why is it… that some people can't find a way to accept what they feel?"

She wondered if Mai would find the strenghth to return to Joey… and she realized that she, Karmina, had done a similar thing. She had been brave, in going there. Seto could just as easily have thrown her from the building and never spoken to her again.

If that had happened… would I have been able to go on? Would I have found a reason to keep on going?

She found that she didn't know the answer. Although she would like to think that she would, that she wasn't weak or pathetic… how could she really know what she'd have done, if it had gone differently?

Would she be like Mai? Would hearing the name Seto Kaiba bring tears to her eyes, instead of joy? Would it make her heart shatter into a million pieces instead of making it feel whole?

There were too many questions. There was too much to do. And there was only one of her.

End note: Well… what did you think? Tell me!