Addicted to the enemy Chapter 15:Fading away, a harry potter fanfic

Disclaimer- I don't anything to do with Harry potter. I do not own Kelly Clarkson's 'Because of you' nor do I own Evanescence 'My immortal'

A/N This chapter is emotional and made me cry! That's saying something!

I am basing this chapter on the Kelly Clarkson hit 'Because of you' and Evanescence 'My immortal'.

I know what 'Because of you' really means, but I am interpreting it in my own way. So when you read this. Most of words go with the chapter. So ignore the real meaning of the song. And make your own meaning. Thanks.

I also warn you. You may not like what I am doing to this fic. But there is a reason why. Please don't abandon it. I have a reason for all this. Trust me. You will love it.

P.S…This chapter is VERY long…enjoy…

Chapter fifteen: Fading Away

Malfoy slowly made his way into the common room that night. He slowly made his way the couch and sat down staring into the fire. There was no expression on his face. He just simply sat there.

Hermione was lying on her bed that night when she heard the portrait hole open. She quietly made her way down the stairs and saw Malfoy sitting on the couch. He hadn't even noticed that she had come down and sat next to him.

She observed him for a few minutes. Her face still blotchy from the tears that she had shed that that night.

She looked down at his hands and noticed he was trembling. She reached down and took his in her own. With the other, she caressed it reassuring him that they could work through this.

He didn't look away from the fire, nor did he flinch from the touch. Instead he did something she had never seen him ever do. No one had ever seen him do. He burst into tears. Hermione jumped from the sudden out burst. He pulled his hand away and covered his face with his hands. Hunched over he let tears fall.

Hermione didn't know what to do. She had never seen him like this. She reached over to try and hug him, but instead he pushed her away and shot off the couch.

'Don't touch me Granger' he wiped away a tear and stormed up to his room.

Hermione sat on the couch staring after him. Tears stinging her eyes. It broke her heart to see him like this. She was also hurt. The way he said that to her was almost cruel.

She heard things crashing and breaking coming from his room. She leapt off the couch and ran up to his room, slowly opening the door.

There, she saw a teary, but angry Malfoy attacking his bookshelf. He was pulling books and objects down throwing them across the room.

She stepped into the room and heard a crack under her feet. She looked down and picked it up.

It was a picture of Malfoy with his family. She observed the picture. He seemed happy and this warmed her heart.

She looked at the now smashed picture and tears began to fall. Malfoy stopped trashing his room and looked at Hermione. He walked up to her and tore the picture from her grip and threw it across the room.

'Get out!' he yelled in her face. Hermione jumped. She reached to touch him but he pulled back.

'Draco. Please…I…'

'Don't touch me. It's over. Now leave!' he turned to walk towards the bathroom. Heavy tears of shock began to flow down her cheeks. Her voice was raw and muffled with tears as she spoke.

'Draco Malfoy. Don't you dare walk away from me after telling me it's over. You better give me a damn good reason why you are breaking this off'

Malfoy stopped dead in his tracks and turned slowly towards her.

'What part of "It's over" don't you understand?' Hermione stared at him. She was so hurt.

'You don't tell me something like that and not give a reason'

'You want a reason?' he began to walk towards her 'Pansy is pregnant. That's a reason'

'You don't know that. She could be lying to break us up. And I dare say it must be working'

Malfoy stepped a little closer.

'She is pregnant Granger. We had the test done. It turned red. She is carrying my child. My duty is to her now. You can no longer be in my life'

Heavy tears began to fall down. Malfoy looked at her. The hurt he felt in saying these words killed him inside. But he had to do it. He had to break it off. He had to make her move on with her life.

'Don't. Don't you care for me? Don't you love me at all?' she asked through sobs.

As much as it pained him. He had to say it.

'Not anymore. From this moment, you are nothing but a memory' these words felt like someone had just ripped out her heart and ripped it into a million pieces. She felt sick, she felt anger. This pain, she had never felt before in her life.

'I know that you love me Malfoy' he had been walking towards the bathroom, when he heard this. He stopped. But did not turn around. He took in a deep breath.

'Of course I do' he turned to face her 'I have never felt this way about anyone before in my life. Usually it's for a good time. But you, you are different' a tear escaped 'that's why I have to do this. I can no longer be with you. It's over and that's that. What we had is nothing more. I have to be with Pansy now.

Hermione walked over to him and took his hand in hers. But he pulled back.

'Don't make this harder than it already is Granger'

'Draco. Don't let this ruin what we have. Its something special' he simply looked at her.

'Do you love me?' she stared into his eyes. She could see the hurt. She opened her mouth to say something but no words came out.

'That's what I thought. You don't love me Granger. That's what makes it easier to do this. I love you. But you don't'

'Draco. I have very deep feelings towards you. Like you said. I have never felt this way about anyone before. I don't want this to end. Its not everyday you fall for the person you hated for so long'

He looked deep into her eyes.

'Some day Granger. You will realise that you love me and it will be too late. This is the end of us. It cant be anything more' he turned and walked into the bathroom, quietly closing the door behind him.

Heavy tears fell down her face as she stared at the door. She slowly made her way out of his room and into her own. She collapsed on the bed. That night, she cried herself to sleep.

Weeks had gone past since the break up. Hermione's world felt as though it crumbled around her. She felt pain beyond belief. Just even a gimps of him made her stomach sink. She would walk into the common room and find him sitting on the couch. She couldn't take it so she would hide in her room.

She would see him with pansy at meal times and in the halls. She couldn't handle it, so she would run into the bathroom and cry. The burning pain she felt was strong.

She knew he still loved her. She saw it when they would accidentally lock eyes. She could do nothing though. Pansy was pregnant and they were set to marry when older.

Malfoy would try with every hope to forget about her. He couldn't. His eyes betrayed him when he would look over at her in the great hall. She was everywhere and it made it very hard.

They would occasionally bump into each other and was very awkward. They would have do assignments together and was very hard to do. Being so close to her and not able to touch made his heart sink.

Months flew past as the graduation drew near. There was going to be a ball for the whole school to congratulate them. After the ball, they would be leaving in two days time.

Hermione was finally at least a bit happy at this. She would be leaving Hogwarts and will never see Malfoy again. But this also brought her pain.

Hermione entered the Great hall one afternoon. She sat beside Ginny. Harry and Ron were sitting opposite her, stuffing their faces after a rather long Quiddtich practice.

Hermione's gaze shifted along to the Slytherin table, where Pansy and Malfoy were engaged in a snogging session. Hermione turned away. She couldn't bear to look.

Ginny noticed this and rubbed Hermione's back.

'Hermione. You have to let it go. He is with her now. I know this must be hard, but you have to. For your own good'

'Ginny. This hurts so bad. I am scared. Scared of everything. I am scared to even think about someone else and to go into another relationship because I am afraid I will get hurt again. I hate this. Even looking at him hurts' Hermione looked at her plate.

'You need something to keep your mind off it. Well. There is the Graduation coming up. Maybe we can go and find a dress. Heaven knows I need to find one' Hermione wiped away a tear.

'Yeah. That would be nice' Hermione was completely unaware of the grey eyes following her.

A few days later Hermione and Ginny entered a beautiful boutique in Hogsmeade.

They looked around for dresses. Ginny found a beautiful red dress that came to her knee. It was a low cut halter and it fit perfectly around her.

'Ginny, you look beautiful in that. You must buy it' Ginny had stepped out of the change room with the dress on.

'Thanks Mione. I love it! Can't wait to wow Harry. Ok. I am going to take this off and we have to find you one' she went back inside as Hermione started to wander around.

Hermione found a few dresses. Without looking she stepped back and bumped into someone.

'Oh, sorry I…' she looked up and saw a pregnant Pansy looking back at her.

'You better watch where you're going mudblood' she sneered and waddled away. She was very pregnant and was due sometime after school finished.

Hermione shook her head and looked up again. Chocolate met grey. Her heart felt as if it was caught in her throat.

'Granger' he said

'Malfoy' she whispered and walked away. They often met like this. It was always too much.

He watched her as she walked towards the change room. She turned and got one more look at his eyes. The look they gave each other was intense. She broke it and walked into a change room.

Malfoy walked to find Pansy.

'Draco! There you are. I found the perfect dress for this huge stomach to fit in!' Malfoy was not paying any attention.

'Draco? Did you hear what I said?' she looked in the direction he was looking and saw Hermione come out of the change room with a light blue dress on.

'Draco. Stop looking at her. You are with me. In case you have forgotten I am carrying your child' she snapped.

Malfoy tore his eyes away and looked at her. His hands were in his pockets and had a hurt expression on his face.

'Yes Pansy. I know. There is no need to remind me. Now can we hurry up so we can go' with that Pansy found some dresses and tried them on.

By this time Hermione had found the perfect dress. Ginny was so exited because it was perfect. They took it to the counter and paid for it.

'Hermione! That dress is going to look, so…wow!' Ginny giggled. Hermione laughed and shook her head.

The night of the Graduation came around quickly. Hermione and Ginny had spent most of the day getting ready.

By the time it came for them to go to the Great hall, they were ready.

Harry and Ron were waiting down in the common room for them. Malfoy was also there, waiting for Pansy who was getting ready in his room.

First, Ginny came down the stairs. Her red dress flowing nicely and her hair up in an elegant bun.

'You look beautiful' said Harry. He took her hand and kissed it lightly.

Just then pansy came down the stairs in a black dress. It was also to her knee with spaghetti straps. Her hair was up in curls.

She went over to Malfoy and kissed him. Ginny rolled her eyes and looked towards the stairs.

'Wait until you see Hermione' she said a little louder for them all to hear.

Hermione's door creaked open and she stepped onto the landing. Malfoy broke away from Pansy and looked up at Hermione. He was literally robbed of breath.

Her dress came down to her calf. It was creamy white and had glittery silver material trimming it. It was a beautiful flowy dress. It was goddess. The back was open and her hair fell down it in loose curls. The front was low cut and showed a little cleavage. Her make up was done to highlight her best features. To make her glow. She was a vision.

She walked down the stairs. Ron had asked her to the ball and she accepted. She was a little afraid, but Ginny convinced her to go.

'Hermione…wow' managed Ron.

'Thankyou Ron' she smiled. Harry, Ron and Ginny turned around to leave. Just as she was about to turn to follow, she caught a glimpse of Malfoy. He was wearing a pair of nice dress pants and a black button down shirt. He looked gorgeous.

She swiftly turned around and went out the portrait hole.

They entered the Great hall. It was beautiful. The walls were covered in moving pictures of the graduates and there were floating candles.

The tables were draped with a white cover and candles. Everything was glittery and glamorous.

Pretty soon, students began to dance as the band began to heat up. They played some muggle music as well. The ball was going fantastic.

Hermione sat with her friends at the table, but could not keep her eyes off Malfoy. Her stomach was doing flips. She wanted to just go over and kiss him, but she couldn't. It hurt her a lot.

Professor Dumbledore stood up at the teacher's table to make an announcement.

'Students of Hogwarts. This shall be the last ball that the graduates of this year are going to be attending. This is a celebration of your wonderful years with us. I, on behalf of all the teachers want to thank you all for such magical years. We wish all the best for the rest of your lives as the amazing witches and wizards you all are.

Now, to officially kick of the celebration of our graduates, will Mr. Malfoy and Miss. Granger please make their way to the floor for the first dance'

Hermione's heart stopped. She totally forgot that she had to dance with Malfoy.

'Hermione? Did you hear what he said? You have to go' Ginny nudged her. In the shock state that she was, Hermione slowly made her way to the dance floor. Everyone had cleared it for the dance.

Malfoy, who was also in shock made his way to the floor. His stomach doing flips as he saw Hermione walking towards him. They locked eye contact and did not shift as they walked up to each other.

Everyone stood around watching them. They all knew about their romance and the break up. So to watch them, it was intense.

Hermione walked up to Malfoy never breaking eye contact, her heart beating fast and her breathing quickened. The tension in the room was thick. Pansy was in the corner fuming with anger at this.

The music began. It was a muggle song named 'Because of you'.

As the introduction began, Malfoy took Hermione around the waist pulling her in close. Her heart began to flutter; it had been so long since he had touched her.

She put an arm on his shoulder. He looked at her and lightly, took her other hand in his. The minute their hands touched, and explosion erupted in both of them. Instantly they intertwined together. Both, holding each other close as they began to dance.

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far

Their hands were close to their bodies. Malfoy pulled her in closer as Hermione leaned her head against his cheek. Instantly forgetting about Pansy and all about the break up.

Because of you
I never strayed too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

It felt as though the air had frozen in the room. Like they were the only ones there. Their body language was intense. The way they moved so close to each other. Hermione moved her hand from his shoulder to around his neck.

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Hermione felt like crying. The feelings that were rushing through her body could not be explained in words. They were practically holding each other. Hugging each other. She had not felt his touch in so long.

The lights had dimmed as they danced.

I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

A silent tear escaped. This was too much for her. It was almost cruel. She couldn't take it. Being so close to him. Feeling him. She could smell him. It drove her crazy.

Malfoy was in a world of his own. Being with the only one he loved, touching her this way. It killed him.

Because of you
I never strayed too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Everyone had stopped and stared. Not one word was said as this dance continued. Only the music could be heard. And you could almost hear Hermione's heart beating.

Hermione closed her eyes as the song began to end. She rubbed her fore head against his cheek in a loving way. Malfoy closed his eyes and took it all in. it would be the last time they would be like this. For he was taking the early train tomorrow. He would be leaving a day early.

Because of you
Because of you

The song ended as students began to erupt with claps. Mafloy and Hermione didn't hear it though. It was like it was in the distance. When they realised, they reluctantly pulled away and looked at each other. A single tear fell down her face. Malfoy wiped it away with his thumb.

'You look beautiful tonight' he whispered. Another tear fell down her cheek.

'Don't Malfoy. Don't make this any harder' she whispered and ran out of the great hall. She ran into the bathroom and into a cubical.

She locked the door behind her, put the toilet cover down and sat on it. Heavy tears fell down her face as memories of the dance came to her. Memories of the thing they had. That's all it was now…a thing. It was nothing more.

It killed her. How could anyone do this to her.

'Hermione?' a soft voice came from outside. Hermione sat up and damped her face with some toilet paper. She opened the door to a concerned Ginny.

'Oh, Hermione' she walked up to Hermione and wrapped her arms around her. Hysterical tears fell down onto Ginny's bear shoulders. Hermione hugged her tighter as she let out all her feelings.

Half an hour had passed and the girls were still in the bathroom. Hermione had stopped crying and was leaning against a wall. Ginny had gone to get her a glass of water and came back a few minutes later.

'Hermione. That was so painful to watch. I could feel it' she handed Hermione the water. She took a sip and looked at her.

'It was the most, the strongest thing I have ever felt. It was cruel for someone to do that to me. But in that brief moment. It felt like it did months ago. He hasn't touched me like that for a long time and to feel it…' she wiped her eyes '…to feel it was painful'

Ginny stood there and listened to her heart broken friend talk about this. It killed her. She had to do something.

'Hermione. You need a bit of time to yourself. I am gonna go and find Harry ok? I'll talk to you later' she gave her one last hug and left Hermione in the girls bathroom.

She stormed down to the great hall. She searched through the crowd until she found him. Grabbing him by the arm she pulled him until they were outside.

'What the hell was that for Weasly?' he snapped fixing up his shirt. Ginny shot him a dirty look.

'You. You have no idea how you have broken her heart' Malfoy looked at her with pain in his eyes. He knew whom she was talking about.

'Look. I had to. Pansy is pregnant with my kid. I have to be with her now. Hermione is not the only one hurting. Do you know what it is like to love someone, to see them everyday and not be able to touch them?'

'Well, that girl you love…is in the bathroom crying over you. She has not been the same since you broke it off so cruelly with her'

'I had to. I couldn't have her still have feelings for me anymore. It would have made it harder. I cant do this' he went to walk away, but Ginny pushed him back.

'Oh no you don't. That girl has thought of nothing but you. She cries all the time and is never happy. This is killing her Malfoy. Isn't it obvious?' Malfoy looked at her questionably. '…She is in love with you'

Malfoy leaned against the wall and took a deep breath.

'She doesn't love me. I broke her heart and I broke my own. She knows that I love her, but she has never once said she loves me. She only had feelings'

'She is in the girls bathroom right now. If I were you. I would go and talk to her' she went to turn around.

'I cant. I am with Pansy. If I go see Granger…it will make everything harder. I leave tomorrow and I will never see her again. That dance was all I wanted. I cant go see her'

'Stuff Pansy! Do you love her? Do you want to be with her?' Malfoy said nothing 'she maybe carrying your child, but you don't have any sort of feelings towards her like you do Hermione.' Malfoy looked up and pushed himself off the wall.

'Go and find her. Don't let this slip through your hands'

With that Malfoy ran down the corridor to the girls bathroom. He stopped in front of it and slowly opened the door. There stood Hermione with her back to him. She was looking out the window, rubbing her hands up and down her arms in an effort to keep herself warm.

She heard the door creak open.

'Ginny…I thought you were going to leave me some time…' she turned around and saw Malfoy standing in the doorway '…alone. What are you doing here?' she asked in barley a whisper. Malfoy walked into the room and closed the door.

'I came to. To say that…um…I will be leaving tomorrow. I am taking the early train and I will not be seeing you again' a tear escaped her eyes.

'Well, I guess this is goodbye then?'

'Yeah' he looked at his feet and back up the girl he loved so much. 'Before I go though, I want you to know I have never felt this way about anyone before.'

'Please stop Malfoy' she whispered

'…I have never loved someone like I love you…' he walked closer to her. Only centimetres apart '…and I want you to know that after this. I will always love you. You will always be with me. I love you Hermione Granger, always have and always will'

With that, he grabbed her face with both hands and smashed his lips onto hers. Tears streaming down her face as the kiss grew and grew. It was like and explosion erupted in both of them. She instantly wrapped her arms around him bringing him closer, never wanting to let go. He wrapped his arms around her only intensifying the kiss.

Hermione cried into the kisses. She had never felt emotion like this before.

After what seemed like eternity, they broke apart, not letting go. They looked into each other's eyes. The fire was there…but stronger than ever before. He leaned in for a closed lip kiss this time and then let go.

He turned towards the door and opened it. He looked back at a teary Hermione.

'Goodbye Hermione Granger. I will always remember you' with that he left.

Hermione sunk to the floor crying hysterically. One hand over her eyes and the other across her stomach.

The next morning came around quickly. Hermione woke up feeling hollow. He was leaving today. It felt as if a part of her had been ripped away.

She needed to get one more look at him before he walked out of her life forever.

She took a shower and got dressed. She opened her door, at the same time so did Malfoy. Their eyes locked. The pain was so strong. They could not say anything to each other, in fear of making it worse. And as if in slow motion, he walked down the stairs and out of her life forever. Tears slid down her face as she watched him leave.

She stood there staring at the portrait hole, remembering all the good times they had shared. Then it hit her, like a rogue bludger. She was deeply, life changing, head over heals in love with Draco Malfoy! This realisation made her insides flip. Why hadn't she realised sooner? Why hadn't she noticed the way she felt all those months? It was because she was in so much pain and was so hurt to realise. But now she did. She needed to tell him. She needed to let him know how she felt before he was gone for good.

With that she ran down the stairs and out of the portrait hole. She ran down halls and corridors, knocking students past her as she went, ignoring the screams coming from behind her. Out of breath she reached the front door and ran down the stairs hoping the carriages were still there.

She ran down to the lorn and stopped dead. In the distance she could see them. She was too late. She sank to her knees and stared after them. He was gone.

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

She slowly made her way up the stairs and walked though halls and corridors. Tears staining her face.

Malfoy sat in the carriage next to Pansy, staring out the window back at Hogwarts. He felt empty.

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

Thoughts of the year she had flooding her mind.

Thoughts of the year flooding his mind.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

Thoughts of his touch, his kiss. She ran her fingers over her lips as she made her way up to her common room.

He ran his fingers over his lips. He closed his eyes remembering the taste of her lips.

You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me

She walked through her portrait hole.

Pansy leaned over and wrapped her arm around his.

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

She walked up the stairs and went to his door. She stopped and looked at the plaque 'Draco Malfoy' she slowly opened the door and went over to his bed. She sat down on it. Tears stinging her eyes. She could still smell him.

She got up and walked into her room.

He sat in the carriage; her smell still lingered on him.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

She opened her door and went over to her desk.

He pulled away and looked down at the girl he had to spend the rest of his life with.

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

She pulled out her diary and wrote down the entry for that day.

His mind screamed for him to just jump out and run back to her. But he couldn't. He was with Pansy now. That's how it had to be.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

She closed it and lay down on her bed, tears staining her pillows as she shed silent tears.

It's so hard to fall in love. It's hard to fall for the enemy. But as the old saying goes. It's better to have love and lost, than never to have loved at all.

July 29th…

It all began the night I gave in. Gave into his charm and passionately kissed my very enemy. The very person I hated more in this world. The person I least expected this to happen with.

And now I sit, months after that fateful night, and I write to you…today, I lost the one person I never expected to fall so deeply in love with. Draco Malfoy…my enemy.

THE END…

A/N wow! I am crying like hell. OMG! This chapter took 14 pages on word.

Well, there you go, the end. The end of this is the beginning of the sequel. I have already planned what I am going to do in that.

I want to thank all reviewers and readers that have taken their time to read my story. It means a lot. I was very careful when I wrote this because I didn't want it rushed. And this ending, this chapter took a lot of planning to come out the way I wanted it to. So I thank you all for being so loyal to this fic. Please look out for the sequel…which I will call 'Addicted to the enemy 2' so its easier to find.

P.S…I know it was very long, but I couldn't break it up! It was too important.