Disclaimer: I do not own CSI

AN: Next chapter : ) hope you'll like it. I promise that there will happen something that clears up everything in the later chaps :whistles: but I'm a saddist so... well just read if you like to : )

maybe a little warning, there is a reason why this fan fic is rated M. This wont go NC17, but there's a reason for it being rated M and it's not really because of an "sexual" aspect.

chapter 2

He still couldn't believe it, there he was, sitting in the interrogation room, but this time not as CSI, not as the scientist that he was, no today he was accused to be the murderer of the only person he had ever loved, the only person that he had ever felt connected with…

"Your fingerprints have been found all over the place, you did not really think that you could get away with this, did you?" the detective asked him harshly.

He just didn't understand, how could his fingerprints be at the scene? He had never before been at this motel, how could they be there?

But in fact he didn't really care, he had lost everything in life that had ever meant something to him. Actually he didn't care about anything anymore.

"Why did you kill her?" The detective asked almost whispering, calling on him to confess.

He kept still. He couldn't have killed her. Never he could have hurt her on purpose, let alone killing her.

"Did she make you angry?" He shot an asking look at Grissom. "Did it make you angry that she showed up here after such a long time? Did you settle an old score?"

"I didn't do this to her." Grissom said quietly, with a dry voice.

"According to the rumors you and Miss Sidle were romantically involved until she left thecity from one day to the other."

He is late, he had promised her to be home half an hour ago and he knows that she will be mad at him. It was his first day of work after the accident. She quit her job, she just hadn't been able to stand it anymore. He had taken off three weeks to spend the time with her, he is sure that she needs him with her, that she wasn't able to be alone.

He had promised to be home on time but while driving back from the crime scene to the lab he just had to stop and watch the sun rise. Its magic had given him new hope. The beauty of the rising sun, the beauty of the new day, the symbol for a new beginning.

He unlocks the door and enters, he walks through the hallway into the living room, calling out her name while doing so. She doesn't answer.

He enters the living room and sees her leaning against the frame of the door that's leading to the patio. She's standing with her back to him, the light lets her hair shine and he can't help but think how incredible beautiful she is. But at the same time he's filled with worry, why doesn't she turn around, why doesn't she say anything?

"Sara?" He asks softly and holds his breath.

She doesn't move. He wonders whether to walk over to her or to stay where he is. "Sara honey?"

Now she turns around. Her face is swollen, her eyes are blood-shot. She's not crying but she must have cried for hours.

They stare at each other. He feels pain rising up in him. He does not want her to cry, he does not want her to be sad. But he knows that he can't help her. And this helplessness is driving him insane.

Their gazes meet and for a long time they remain in silence, their eyes never letting go off each other, neither he nor she moves away. Everything is silent around them, the beautiful morning turns into a beautiful day while inside of their house he senses that the new beginning he had been hoping for would rather be an ending.

After a long time she breaks away from his gaze, she walks over to him, slowly. And right then he notices the three traveling bags on the ground next to the kitchen counter. He feels as if his heart is stabbed with a knife, the pain rushes through his body like a bolt, with an enormous speed.

She is shaking as she stops one foot away from him. Their eyes meet again and the urge to pull her into his arms becomes almost unbearable. But he feels that she doesn't want him to hold her.

He sees the tears rising up in her eyes again, as one runs over her cheek he argues with himself whether to wipe it away with his thumb or to pretend that it's not there.

"I'm sorry." She whispers and he knows that this is her way to say goodbye.

He feels his heartbeat stopping right then. He can't feel the pain anymore because his whole body went numb.

She breaks the connection of their eyes and turns her face away from him. He wants to say something, he wants to make her stay, he does not want to loose her. He wishes that he could fight for her but he knows that he already lost this fight.

"I understand." He whispers. He does not understand. He does not understand her at all, but he knows that this is what she needs to hear. He knows that, in her eyes, leaving is the only thing that she can do.

"So your suspicions are founded in rumors Detective Manson?" Gil's lawyer asked.

"Our suspicions are founded in the fact that we found your client's fingerprints in the victim's motel room, on her personal things and on the murder weapon."

Grissom swallowed hard.

"When your client has any other logical explanation why his prints were found there, I am willing to listen to him."

There was just no explanation for it! But he could not, did not want to believe that he could be able to do something like this. Not to her! Not to anybody but especially not to her!

Manson waited half a minute, the room lay in silence for that time, silence that Grissom wished he wouldn't have to hear.

"Where have you been five days ago between one and four AM Doctor Grissom?" Detective Manson asked with his obtrusive voice.

He didn't know. All he remembered was that he had had a couple of drinks and later on took two pills of the painkillers against his migraine. He also remembered that his schnapps had been out and that he had decided to get new one right then. From then on he didn't remember the tiniest thing.

Grissom stared down on his hands, wondering if these hands could maybe commit murder.

"Doctor Grissom?" Manson asked with raised eyebrow.

"I've been at home I think."

"You think?"

"I wasn't at work that night. I had planned to take off this day weeks ago. I spent the evening at home and had a couple of drinks, that's all I remember."

"A witness saw Miss Sidle and an unknown man enter her motel room at one AM in that night. The man left at four AM, Miss Sidle hadn't been seen again after that, there was a 'do not disturb' sign on her door so the motel personnel did not enter to clean up her room… until they suspected that something must be wrong in there because Miss Sidle hadn't been seen in all those days in between said night and the night that she has been found." The detective told him with cold voice. "I have following theory. You and Miss Sidle had an affair for some time until she left… or 'quit her job' as it's officially told. Now I was asking myself why she left… did something happen? No matter what it was, when she returned to Las Vegas last week and met you, maybe she even contacted you, you lost it, didn't you? She lived her life the way she wanted it to live, without being dependent on you, maybe she was dependant on someone else now? Maybe you couldn't stand the thought of her being with someone else. But you didn't let her notice. You went to her motel room with her. Then you argued with her, maybe, or did you just attack her? You had your reason already, hadn't you? You raped her and then you killed her. You thought you were smart, making sure to not leave behind any DNA evidence, removing her finger tips and tiptoes, cutting her face to make it impossible to identify her. But you forgot the driver's license. Why? Were you in a hurry? You didn't have the time to make sure we wouldn't find your fingerprints either… Or did you just stop caring whether we'd find you or not?"

He felt tears rising up in his eyes, desperation filling his body. "I did not kill her! I could have never hurt her! She's my life! She has always been although she left! I would never be able to do something like this to her!"

TBC