(A/N: Hi peoples! Sorry I took so long to update. I could give excuses, but I don't think I'd be able to name any that you haven't heard before, so I'm not going to waste your time.

Please, please, please; if you see any spelling, grammar, tense, or point of view mistakes, let me know. I'm really trying to become a better writer. Any and all help is appreciated. Also, if you see any out of character-ness, please tell me. I think that keeping people in character is the most important factor in a Fanfiction, I am working on it very hard, but I'm still not too great at it. Again, help is very much appreciated.

Please review! I will read and review your stories if you do! Everybody loves reviews!

Disclaimer: No witty remarks, no new creative way to state the ever-so obvious horrible facts of our doomed existence, just the simple, creation rights to Jhonen, and ownership rights to Viacom.)

Chapter 1 Zim's Promotion

Zim was yanked to his feet from where he had been thrown before his leader's furious glares. His hands were linked together with thick metal handcuffs, and his feet were bound about three inches apart, making walking an almost impossible task. His once vividly reckless crimson eyes were now shaky and observant. His gaze shifted constantly from his shackles to the three jeering guards surrounding him.

When his eyes met those of the towering Irkens before him he blinked suddenly in recognition, his past confidence returning in an instant.

"MY TALLEST!" he shouted indignantly, "What is the meaning of this? Make these fools release me at ONCE!"

"Zim," Red said quietly, "you won't get out of this one with your simple idiocy. The Control Brains will have to listen to us this time."

Purple's eyes had been following Zim's every move intently. The enraged look on his face only increased with each word that came out of the little Irken's mouth.

"But, My Tallest, what do you mean? I have brought this planet to its knees, just as I said I would. See, just look out the window!" He tried to rush eagerly towards the Massive's front window, but tripped instantly, falling flat on his face.

"Zim, you didn't do anything; those are our ships and troops out there, not yours!" Red said angrily as Zim's guards pulled him roughly too his feet, "you haven't made a single step of progress in all the time you have been here, and you have been here for eight years, Zim. Eight years and still this planet prospers on just as you reported it did on your first day.

"Operation Impending Doom Two was over three years ago. Every other Invader has conquered their planet. All except Tenn, of course. Those Meekrob can be pretty tough to beat, especially with all those malfunctioning SIR units running around." Zim didn't know that those SIR units had been the Tallest's fault, and Red wasn't about to tell him. "That and the added bonus of their alliance with the Resisty assured their victory, but you were there, why am I explaining this to you?"

"But, My Tallest," Zim continued, his eyes filling with the same pitiful desperation they had at the great assigning, "please, just give me one more year, I'll have Earth on its knees by then for sure! Or maybe just a month, how about that? Please? Just a month isn't so much, you can wait until then, can't you?"

"Zim, will you just LISTEN for ONCE in your life?" Red exploded. He tried to calm himself for a moment, then continued, "The operation is OVER! And even if it weren't, you can't conquer this planet. We already did, you saw it yourself. There's nothing left, the final cannon sweep is scheduled for later this day, and let me tell you, you wont be the one firing it."

Zim's mouth opened as though to protest further, but Red cut him off, "NO! Just no. I don't want to listen to your idiocy any more. You almost destroyed all of IRK! The Control Brains WILL listen to us, and if they don't" his eyes met Zim's with a look of almost sadistic anticipation, "well, accidents happen, right? People fall out of airlocks and into cannon sweep ammo slots all the time, don't they?"

Zim blinked, clearly not catching the poorly disguised threat, "well, not unless they are really stupid or human or something like that...but what does that have to do with my promotion?"

Red shook his head, "Zim, we weren't talking about any promotions."

"Eh?" Zim's left antenna lifted questioningly, "we weren't? Well, we should have been." He paused for a moment then glanced up at his angry leader hopefully, "so, about my promotion..."

"NO, Zim," Red screamed, not even trying to keep his temper any longer, "we are talking about your DEATH! Your EXPIRATION! How can you be so stupid?"

Zim's eyes widened a bit at this comment, but Red wasn't finished.

"The entire thing was a lie, y'know? We didn't even expect you to find a planet when we sent you out on your stupid secret mission! We just wanted to get rid of you! You don't know how many times we have tried to have you killed in the years that you have been gone! It seems like millions…actually it probably is. You NEVER noticed! It was hilarious for so long, the entire armada laughing behind your back!" His eyes narrowed at Zim, waiting for a moment, allowing the news to sink in, "you and all your stupid plans, ha ha, and the meat! That was the best!"

He raised his gaze to the ceiling, chuckled for a moment; then stopped suddenly, eyes narrowing sharply on Zim's tiny figure once again, "but now, Zim, now the joke is over. It was amusing for a wile, but after what you did, we can't allow you to wreak the havoc of your very existence on us any longer."

"But...but my promotion..." Zim began.

"NO, Zim," Red had to fight with every bit of his will power to resist shoving Zim through the nearest airlock right then and there. "Shut up, just SHUT UP!"

"Hey, Zim," Purple broke his silence suddenly, "what's wrong with your Pak?"

"Eh?" Zim glanced over his shoulder dully. There was a large dent in one of the pink cover dots, and every now and then little waves of electricity ran visibly around the entire Pak, "Oh, that. Y'know I'm not quite sure. It was probably something the Dib did, I kinda remember us having some kind of fight but then…" his voice trailed off as he glanced around in surprise. "Hey! I'm on the Massive! How did I get here? And why am I all tied up? RELEASE ME!"

"Zim, you moron, you launch a doomsday destruct-o-missile right at Irk and you think we won't do anything about it?" Red peered at Zim, he hadn't thought he could get any more stupid but, obviously, he was wrong.

"What? No I didn't! That's ridiculous, why would I do something like that?" Zim glared up at his leaders indignantly.

"Well, I don't know Zim, why would you take the key card to your new Invaze-iffic Combat Stealth Mech. and wreak all of Irk?" Purple answered sarcastically.

"Hey, I SAID I put the fires out, what more do you want?" Zim tried once again to take a step towards the window, desperate to get a look at the destruction outside. He fell, once again, on his face. A collective snigger could be heard from the crowd of pilots and engineers aboard the Massive.

"SILENCE! Silence or suffer the wrath of ZIM!" Zim tried to struggle to his feet, but with his hands incapacitated, it was proving to be a difficult task. The sniggers turned into full-forced laughter when he tried to activate his spider legs, only to find that they had been severed at the very roots.

Zim planted his hands squarely on the floor in front of him, and pushed with all his might. He flew over sideways, hitting his Pak on the ground sharply. Sparks and electricity flew from the damaged section and Zim's entire body fell limp. The laughter rose to a deafening roar as the guards poked pointlessly at his motionless form. He didn't move.

"My Tallest?" One of the guards said through barely controlled laughter, "I think he's dead."

This brought more laughter from the onlookers. Purple fell over holding his gut and trying to breathe through his hysterical tears.

"Well," Red gasped, barely catching his breath, "I guess our appointment with the Control Brains is no longer needed…oh, and go ahead and throw him out the airlock. Lets just fire the final sweep now and get out of here."

"Yes, My Tallest," the guards hurried off to their jobs, still giggling uncontrollably.