Disclaimer: Mine! Mine I say! Mine! Well... at least in my dreams it is...
-... This update is a littleearlier than usual. Ehehehe... I wonder if I can get away with that....
How many of you are Christians out there? If you are, I think it'd be really nice if you could check out . They host the Operation Christmas Child project that helps send Christmas presents to kids in 95 different countries that have never ever received a present before. I was really excited when I made my present for them.
Ok then! On with the story!
Ice Queen
Chapter Twenty-Five
Syaoran's POV
"... Sakura?" Syaoran's voice was hesitant as he rapped gently on his housemate's door. "Are you ok?"
Silence.
An extremely worried expression slowly formed on his face as he tried knocking again, "Sakura, come on. Dinner is ready."
This time, Syaoran could make out the muffled words, "Don't want dinner. You go eat."
... what should I do?
His amber eyes flickered as he stared at the door to her room. He wanted to just kick it down and demand what was wrong... yet...
Sighing, he reluctantly went downstairs and began cooking dinner... enough for two... just in case Sakura decided she was hungry.
I can't just barge into her room... we might be friends, but... she's still the Ice Queen. The second I do that, I'd betray her trust in me... and she'd freeze up.
Syaoran felt miserable as he began putting the food into bowls, wrapping Sakura's portion in a plastic covering to keep it warm for a while.
All the while he was eating (more like taking two bites and then drifting off) his chopsticks merely danced around in his rice. His thoughts obviously somewhere else.
... Hm...
... where am I?
The brown haired boy tried to stand, but ended up falling back down again.
"What the?" Syaoran growled as he began pushing with his arms, but every time any pressure was placed onto his legs, he collapsed... again and again.
Footsteps.
Looking around frantically, he tried to distinguish were the sound of the footsteps were coming from. They were getting louder...
And louder...
And louder...
"Syaoran."
Eh?
"Sakura!" he looked at her in relief. "Give me a hand, will ya? I can't seem to get up. There's something wrong with my legs... Sakura?"
The emerald-eyed girl hadn't moved. She was staring at him emotionlessly... no. There was emotion in her eyes, but it was so deep that he could drown in it. So deep that he almost could see what it was.
Sadness. Pure pain and hurt swam in her eyes as she stared at him. Her lips were dry and cracked as she put a pale finger to them before saying, "Syaoran. You can be so much more. You had friends before you came to me... you should go to them. Go to them and you won't be hurt. I'm not a good person... go... away..."
Alarm shot through every pore in his body as he forcefully pushed himself on his feet to walk over to her and take her in his arms. But he had forgotten. His feet gave way and he fell once more.
Turning to her for help, Syaoran spoke, "Sakura, what's wrong? Can you help me? Come here, Sakura. Come here!"
She was still not moving. Her eyes no longer held that heart wrenching pain. The sadness that seemed to shatter every piece of his heart was gone. It was blocked from him. The feeling he was now experiencing... was even worse.
He felt alone.
For the first time since he met Kinomoto Sakura, he felt truly alone. The separation and isolation nearly squeezed the life out of him. Choking his very being with the heavy, cutting emotion of being rejected and outcast.
Her eyes were shielded and she slowly turned away from him before speaking a few last words, "You should go to the others. You can be so much more. Keep the house... I'm leaving anyway. Don't destroy your future."
"SAKURA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
She didn't even pause at his scream while she walked away from him. Away forever. Away.
Away.
Away.
Alone.
"SAKURA!!!!!" Syaoran gasped. Then held his heart as to slow his racing heart and the heavy beating of his heart.
It's ok... it was just a dream... just a-!
He froze.
Footsteps were coming again. Footsteps... he looked up. There was Sakura, staring at him again.
His legs couldn't move. He was frozen. Cold, alone, and frightened. Syaoran began panting slightly.
Amber eyes became foggy and hollow as he stared in a mix of sadness, fear, and wanting at the girl he saw everyday...
Sakura... Sakura... Sakura...!
"Syaoran!" his eyes regained focus as his gaze was met with the slightly cold, but firm eyes of the woman in his dream. "Syaoran! Get a hold of yourself! What's wrong? I heard you screaming!"
His mouth opened but no sound came out.
Shutting his lips again and swallowing hard, he began again, "A-Ah..."
"Syaoran..." Sakura looked at him with concern. There was emotion in the green pools of her pupils, but it wasn't the tormenting sadness... it was all ok... it would all be ok.
Without any other word, Syaoran just pulled her close to him in a hug and in a trembling voice whispered, "You're not going anywhere... it's ok... You're not going anywhere... right...?"
Unbeknownst to him, Sakura had turned her face away from his and squeezed her eyes shut as if broken in two before hugging him back and lying to him, "Of course."
Sakura's POV
Dawn came far too early the next morning. She had forgotten to pull the curtains closed in the living room and sunlight was pouring onto her face.
Silently watching the rise and fall of Syaoran's chest as he breathed in and out in a rhythmic pattern, Sakura quietly sighed as she slipped out of his embrace and off the couch.
The night before, Syaoran had been so nervous that he could barely get to the couch, and so she had stayed with him until morning, trying to console him.
What was last night all about? I... I lied to him... Why? Why didn't I just tell him the truth? That I... That I have to...
Tilting her head just enough so that she could see his sleeping form, Sakura's body language softened.
I know why. He needed me to comfort him last night. I just can't push him away. He's like a powerful magnet that I'm drawn to. But...
Pressing her head onto the glass of the window, Sakura bit her lip in confusion... something she hadn't done since she entered Tomoeda High and became to Ice Queen of the school.
Raising her hand to her cheek, she nearly shouted in surprise when she felt a thin trickle of water. She was... crying?!
Why...?
Sakura slammed a fist against the windowpane. Why was she crying? She hadn't... she shouldn't...
I shouldn't...
"... Mm.... Sakura...?" with her sleeve, she quickly brushed away all her tears as she turned to face the awakening boy.
Moving towards him, Sakura pressed a hand to his forehead, "How are you? Do you feel like going to school?"
Pushing her hand away, Syaoran grumbled, "I'm fine. Gosh you sound like my mom."
Mom...
That hurt. The very word shot a needle through her heart and she had to resist the urge to squeeze it in pain. Not only that but... when he pushed her hand away. Her away...
Sakura only nodded before walking to her room to prepare for the school day.
I shouldn't...
Get attached.
"I'm going ahead," Sakura picked up the pace of her walking and didn't bother going to her locker. Entering the class a full five minutes before Syaoran did, she took care to look completely isolated in her little corner as she listened to her CD and stared out of the window, ignoring the world... including Syaoran.
This is for the best...
"Ne... Syaoran-kun!" Chiharu grabbed the brown-haired boy aside and whispered in his ear. "We're friends, right? What happened? You've been hanging out with the Ice Queen a lot."
Frowning slightly, Syaoran spoke, "Why can't I be her friend?"
Slightly taken aback, the girl twiddled her fingers a little before shrugging, "I... don't know it's just... has anyone ever told you that you could be really popular?"
Her words reminded him of what Sakura had said the day before.
"Yes..."
"Then why... don't you take the chance?" not pausing for an answer, his classmate quickly returned to her seat as the teacher began class.
Mumbling quietly to himself Syaoran had to will himself not to tremble, "Why does everyone always tell me I can do so much better...? Just like... my dream..."
Her eyes opening the tiniest of bits as a note was flung onto her desk, Sakura lazily opened it and read it's contents:
"Sakura. Thanks for last night. Um... did you bring an extra lunch? I kind of forgot to make one and since we skipped breakfast this morning..."
Folding the paper back up and putting it in her pocket, Sakura smirked, knowing that Syaoran was only trying to lighten the mood between them.
Writing onto a separate piece of paper Sakura closed her eyes and prayed for Syaoran to accept what she was going to do... and not be hurt... and to move on.
When Syaoran got a return note, he swiftly read:
"Nope. Actually, I forgot to make mine too. I'll go home and bring us both something to eat. Don't worry, Eriol won't mind, but don't you dare follow me."
Smiling a small smile, Syaoran grinned and nodded at her. It was going good. It seemed that Sakura was no longer an ice block...
Getting out of her chair, Sakura nodded at Eriol, mouthing the words, "I'll be back," before walking out of the room, feeling her teacher and friend's suspicious glance trail on her as she left.
There. Nothing else was left to do...
Sakura turned and glanced at the picture of her and Syaoran together in the play. Allowing a hint of a smile to grace her lips, Sakura took out a slip of blue paper and wrote on it in silver pen.
Satisfied with the words she had written, Sakura took the picture with her as she walked out of the house...
... and out of his life.
To be continued...
I really don't feel like laughing evilly today so I'll just leave you like this... hanging. - I am evil, aren't I? I'm good at it too! I don't even have to laugh at you to be evil. Cliffhangers are just the best!
-
Quote:
"We enjoy warmth because we have been cold.
We appreciate light because we have been in darkness.
By the same token, we can experience joy because we have known pain and sadness."