You guys are really spoiling me with all the nice reviews, but I'm loving every minute of it. I think this may be better than chocolate.

The Day of Reckoning – Chapter 16

Nick sat on the floor watching Sheppard, who was crowded into the corner and hugging his knees to his chest.

"Colonel, are you sure you don't want to come out? The floor's awfully cold."

"This isn't cold. Stay in the cell that Kolya kept me in for a few hours and then you can talk to me about cold. I'll have to admit, though, they had a good system—freeze you at night and bake you during the day."

Kelly knelt beside Nick. "Carson is on his way. Do you think you can get him to come out?"

Nick shook his head. "I doubt it. He's pretty determined to stay where he is. Get me a blanket."

Kelly nodded and left, returning a few seconds later with the blanket.

"Colonel?" Nick waited until Sheppard looked at him. "How about a blanket?"

Sheppard narrowed his eyes. "This wouldn't be a trick, would it?"

Nick shook his head. "No, I just thought you might be more comfortable with a blanket since it looks like we'll be here for a while. I could slide it over to you."

In spite of what he'd said, Sheppard was getting chilled. "I could use a blanket."

Nick slid the blanket across the floor, getting it close enough for Sheppard to lean forward and grab it. "Thanks."

"You mind if I stay here with you?"

"Suit yourself."

Carson knelt beside Nick and ducked down, looking under the bed at Sheppard. "Son, what are you doin' over there? We have beds, you know."

Sheppard let out a strangled laugh. "Sorry, Doc. Look, I know you don't understand. I just need to stay here for a while. It feels . . . safe. Like Kolya can't find me here. Just please leave me alone."

Nick looked at Carson. "I'll stay here with him. He should be okay."

Carson thought about it. The only way to get Sheppard out of the corner was to forcibly haul him out, which would probably necessitate sedating him. Somehow he didn't think that would help Sheppard's frame of mind or recovery. He wasn't really hurting anything by sitting on the floor. "All right. I'll be here if you need me." Carson got up and walked away, wondering if he should wake Elizabeth or just fill her in in the morning.

Nick and Sheppard sat in silence for several minutes. Sheppard leaned his head back against the wall, staring at the space in front of him. "I ran," he whispered.

"What?" Nick scooted forward a few inches, straining to hear.

"I ran . . . I ran from Kolya. I've never run from anyone in my life, but I ran from him."

"Well, what he did to you was pretty horrible."

"I don't think it's so much what he did as that he got me to give up. I was ready to die. I wanted to die." Sheppard turned his head slightly so he could look at Nick. "Kolya made me want to die, and I never thought anyone would have that kind of power over me. That's what scares me."

Nick swallowed, carefully choosing the next question. "Do you want to die now?"

Sheppard looked at him for several seconds before answering. "No. Mostly I just want to kill Kolya. I'll tell you one thing, though. I'll never run from him again. Never." Sheppard leaned his head back against the wall again and shivered, pulling the blanket tighter to his chest.

oOo

Carson walked up to Nick. "Coffee?"

Nick looked up to see Carson standing there with two steaming cups. "Mmmm. Smells good." He got to his feet, stretching and moaning. "Man, am I stiff." He finally took a cup from Carson and sipped carefully.

"What happened?"

"Not much. Sometimes we talked. Sometimes we just sat."

"Did he get any sleep?"

"No. No sleeping. He was afraid to sleep."

Carson sighed. "We're back to that again."

They turned at the sound of something clanging against the bed to see Sheppard crawling out from behind it. He used the frame to help pull himself to his feet. But when he tried to take a step, his legs gave way. Carson and Nick quickly set their coffee down and each grabbed an arm.

"Colonel, are you all right, son?" asked Carson as they helped Sheppard to the bed.

"I think my legs are asleep." Sheppard looked at the two doctors and then turned his gaze to the floor. "I guess I look pretty crazy about now."

"No," said Carson. "But you'll have to admit that spendin' the night on the floor isn't exactly normal, healthy behavior. I hope you're goin' to let us help you."

"I can't explain what happened. I just felt like Kolya was here and that was the only safe place. I know that doesn't make any sense. The bad thing is, I knew it didn't make any sense last night, but I couldn't get past it."

"Well, right now you need to get some sleep," said Carson.

"I don't guess there's any point in asking if I could rest in my quarters, is there?"

"No, son, I'm afraid not. You need to stay here. I want to make sure you sleep."

Sheppard sighed, his expression downcast. "Can I get a shower?"

Nick smiled. "Now, that we can arrange. I'll get you some clean scrubs."

oOo

When Sheppard emerged from the bathroom, raking his hand through his damp hair, he found his team waiting for him by his bed.

"Hello, Colonel. You are looking well. Do you feel better?" asked Teyla.

Sheppard smiled at her. "Yeah, Teyla, I'm fine. I'm sorry about yesterday."

"There is no need to apologize. You did nothing wrong. I am only sorry that we had to encounter Commander Kolya."

"Yeah," said Sheppard softly. "Me too."

"You can't tell me you didn't at least think it was a possibility," said McKay. "I tried to tell you that going back there was crazy, but oh no, no one ever listens to me."

"McKay," Sheppard groaned. "Shut up and go away. I'm tired."

McKay started to protest until he noticed the darkening shadows beneath Sheppard's eyes and the lines of exhaustion on his face. Sheppard looked beat, plain and simple. "Okay, fine. I'll go. But I'm not finished with this."

Sheppard sighed. "Never thought you were."

"Get some rest, Sheppard. We'll see you later," said Ronon.

"Thanks guys. I just need some sleep."

After the team left, Nick helped Sheppard get settled.

"Nick, thanks for staying with me and . . . and letting me do what I needed to do, no matter how crazy it seemed."

"No problem, Colonel. Everyone has a time when they need something that no one else understands. Do you think you can sleep now?"

Sheppard picked at the blanket. "I don't know. I still feel kind of jumpy."

"If you like, Carson has a special cocktail that should knock you out. Hopefully, once you're under, you'll stay there for a while."

Sheppard hesitated and then nodded. "Might as well try, I guess."

Nick returned a few minutes later with a syringe. "Okay, Colonel, just a little pinch and then you can get some rest." Sheppard barely flinched as Nick injected the drugs into his arm. When Nick dropped the empty into the Sharps container over the bed and sat down in the visitor's chair, Sheppard cocked one eyebrow at him.

"Doc?"

Nick just smiled. "I go off duty in a minute. Just thought I'd sit with you until you doze off, if that's okay."

Sheppard nodded. "Yeah, that's okay. Thanks, Nick."

oOo

Sheppard opened his eyes to the sound of whispering, He lifted his head off the pillow a bit to see Teyla sitting in the chair by the bed, softly taking to Marcy. He smiled as he let his head slip back to the pillow and drifted back to sleep.

The next time he awakened, he heard the clicking that could only be McKay working on his laptop. He lay listening to it for several minutes before it abruptly stopped. He hadn't even been aware he had opened his eyes until McKay's face suddenly appeared, hovering over him.

"Well, it's about time. I was beginning to think you'd sleep forever. Are you okay? Because this isn't normal. I'd better get Carson. Just stay awake and I'll be right back."

Sheppard smiled at the normalcy of McKay's babbling. He felt the tug of sleep and slipped back into its grip.

He opened his eyes to see Ronon, chair leaned back on two legs as he cleaned his knife. Sheppard watched him through heavy lidded eyes for several minutes before letting himself slip back under. He couldn't seem to rise above the exhaustion for more than a few minutes.

Voices, whispering again. He wanted to hear what they were saying, and yet at the same time, he didn't really care. Drifting in and out of sleep had been very pleasant and a part of him didn't want to give that up. It had been a peaceful sleep for once. His team had his back, keeping Kolya at bay. He felt safe and protected and he never wanted to leave.

"John? Are you awake?" He knew the voice. It was Elizabeth. He just didn't know if he had the energy to answer it.

"John?"

Sheppard blinked and opened his eyes. Elizabeth smiled down at him.

"Hey, you're awake."

Sheppard started to reply, but his mouth was dry. "Water?" he managed to ask.

Elizabeth poured some water into a cup and he pulled up on one elbow to drink. After a few sips, he plopped back down on the bed, drained. "How long have I been asleep?"

Elizabeth frowned, worrying him a little. "You've been through a lot and Carson said it really took a lot out of you."

"Elizabeth?"

"You've been asleep for two days."

Sheppard's eyes widened. "Two days?"

Elizabeth nodded.

"Dang," said Sheppard. "I guess I was tired."

oOo

"I'm fine, Doc. Come on, you said yourself how much better I was."

Beckett leaned back and crossed his arms. "Well, I'll admit the sleep did you a world of good. You're blood pressure and pulse are nearly back to normal and you certainly seem more relaxed."

"So I can go, right?"

Beckett had to admit, the man pleading to be released from the infirmary was the closest thing to the old Colonel Sheppard he'd seen in quite a while. He couldn't help but smile.

"Just remember that you have an appointment with Kate this afternoon and one with me first thing in the mornin'. If you miss either one, you'll be right back in here and there won't be any scrubs to be found, if you get my drift."

Sheppard saluted. "You got it, Doc."

"When do you go back to the Genii home world to start your memorial?"

"Not for two more days."

"All right, get plenty of rest between now and then and you can go. I'll get your clothes."

"Thanks, Doc."

Thirty minutes later, Sheppard entered the jumper bay. Teyla and Ronon were just coming out of the back of one of the jumpers.

"Hey guys, how was it?"

They looked surprised. "Colonel Sheppard? Dr. Beckett released you?" asked Teyla.

"Just a few minutes ago. I heard you guys just got back and I thought I'd see what you have."

Teyla smiled. "We have a good load of rock, if you wish to see it."

When Sheppard nodded, she led the way back into the jumper. Sheppard walked over to the pile of stone and picked one up. It was almost rectangular in shape. "These are perfect, Teyla. Thanks."

Teyla nodded. "I thought they would serve your needs. I am glad to hear that they will be acceptable."

"They're great. It looks like we're going to be ready."

oOo

"Are you sure about this?" asked Elizabeth.

"I've never been more sure. I know what I'm doing and I'm going to be okay. My team has seen to that." Sheppard smiled at her.

Elizabeth couldn't help but admit that Sheppard looked good and seemed confident. It was almost like he'd never been kidnapped and tortured. Almost.

"Okay, if you're sure. Is everyone else ready?"

Sheppard nodded. "Teyla and Ronon are waiting. Major Lorne and his men are on their way."

"Okay. And John? Be safe."

He nodded. "I'll be fine. We'll be fine." Sheppard bounded down the stairs two at a time. As he walked over to Teyla and Ronon, Nick walked into the gate room.

"Colonel, could I have a word?"

Sheppard walked over to Nick. "What can I do for you, Doc?"

Nick cleared his throat. "I'm coming."

Sheppard raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"I said I'm coming with you. Carson and I were saying how you should have a doctor on this mission and I volunteered."

Sheppard crossed his arms and leaned on one foot. "And why do I need a doctor?"

"You're doing construction, aren't you? People get hurt all the time doing construction. Very dangerous work."

Sheppard sighed loudly.

"You're not buying this, are you." Sheppard didn't even bother to nod at that. "Alright, look, I want to come for two reasons. One being that you had a bad reaction to being there the last time and I'd like to be there in case it happens again."

"Not going to be a problem this time. I let it catch me off guard before. I wasn't ready. I am now."

"Okay, second reason. Kolya will be there and bad things tend to happen to our people when he's around. And I'm not just worried about you on that one."

Sheppard paused for several seconds. "Welcome aboard, Nick. Get your gear, we leave in ten minutes."

Nick nodded. "I have it right here." He went to the edge of the gate room and met Carson Beckett carrying a backpack and another bag, which he handed to Nick.

Sheppard turned back to Teyla and Ronon. "You know, those doctors are a sneaky lot."

Ten minutes later, they were ready to embark. Sheppard was unarmed, but was accompanied by Teyla, Ronon, Lorne, and three other soldiers who were armed. Nick and his medical gear rounded out the group.

Sheppard turned to look up at Elizabeth on the balcony above. "We're ready. We'll radio back when we're ready for the jumper to deliver the supplies and equipment. Dial the gate."

Elizabeth nodded and turned to pass on the instructions to the tech on duty. A few seconds later, the event horizon appeared and the team went through. Sheppard was the last one to go. He smiled and waved just before turning and walking into the blue puddle, leaving Elizabeth to worry about what would happen on the other side.

TBC