Chapter 11: Mistakes

Sam dropped the book and looked over at Dean who was also looking at him.

"Hails talked to Dad?" asked Sam in a quiet voice

"It could be another John. It doesn't have to be our father."

Sam got up and went down the hall entering Hailey's room. Dean got up and ran to him.

"Sam, I don't think this is a good idea. We shouldn't snoop more than we already have." Dean grabbed his arm but Sam jerked it away

"I'm not leaving till I know the truth."

Sam walked to the dresser and opened the drawer. He slammed it shut and looked in the next one and so on. Dean sighed and exited the room.

Sam looked under her bed and saw a shoe box. He smiled and pulled it out. Inside were letters, pictures and a book. He picked up one of the pictures. Hailey was sitting on a bench and Dean was standing behind the bench with his arms draped over her shoulders and chest, his chin was resting on top of her head. Both had happy smiling faces. I'm guessing before the incident. Sam replaced the picture and took out a letter. He knew he was avoiding the book but he couldn't help it. He opened the folded letter and read from it.

Dear Reece,

When I'm ready I'll give you this letter. Well, if you're reading it than you know I'm ready or you were just snooping. Right now you are one years old and I am fifteen. Your father's name is Dean Winchester. I guess you know already about supernatural baddies. Your father and his father are demon hunters. By the way you have an absentee uncle named Sammy. Well that's what Dean referred to him as, except for he said the absentee brother named Sammy. Your grandpa is John Winchester and your grandma was Mary Winchester. Yes, I said was. When Dean was four and Sammy was just a baby Mary was killed by something supernatural and that is what started the whole fiasco. Anyway, if you ever need to talk to your grandpa tell me because I have his number and I call him monthly. He knows about you and checks up on us often. I'm sorry but your father doesn't know about you. We were afraid to tell him. He is seventeen and a complete and total wuss and ass. Just kidding your father is a great man and I want you to know that. One day you'll meet him. One day.

Love,

Mom

Sam put down the letter and took a deep breath. That is ultra private but related to our question. He got up and took the letter to Dean.

"Dean, I think you should see this," said Sam dropping the letter on Dean's lap and sitting down next to him

"Sam, I don' think I should."

"Dean, do it and by the way I don't like being referred to as the absentee brother named Sammy. Why did you call me that anyway, I wasn't even in college then?"

"Because you weren't there dumb ass and also I knew you were going to leave. It was just so obvious." Dean picked up the letter and began to read trying hard not to look at Sam a few feet away from him

"I'm sorry," said Sam quietly

Dean looked up from the letter and raised an eyebrow, "for what?"

"For leaving you. I'm so sorry Dean."

"Sam, you deserved a normal life more than anything. I should have stayed away from you, shouldn't have come and taken you away from Jessica. She might still be alive and you would have a normal life."

"Dean, I'm actually pretty glad you came. I mean all those years without one word from you. I thought you were fucking dead. At least when I'm with you I know you're still alive. Besides you need me to keep your ass alive."

Dean laughed and looked back down at the letter. He soon bit his lip and threw the letter on the side table.

"So, she stayed in contact with Dad," he said rubbing his chin, "I can't believe this! He knew and he didn't tell me!"

Dean got up and kicked one of the dining room chairs over. He turned to face Sam who was looking down at his feet.

"I'm sorry, not the point," he said and sat back down in his place

"What the hell happened?" asked Hailey standing in the doorway

The two brothers looked at her guiltily. She looked from the turned over chair to the letter and then finally at them.

"So looking at Reece's diary isn't enough, you have to go threw my things also?" she asked angrily dropping the keys on the nearby table and shrugging off her coat

"Well, we uh," started Sam

"How could you not tell me and tell Dad!" asked Dean and jumped up

"Because you would have run away like the stupid scared boy that you are!" she yelled back

"Stupid scared boy? Huh, funny because I go out and fight demons almost everyday!"

"You're not the only one Dean! I do, Sam does, sometimes even Reece!

"Oh yeah, why the hell are you letting our daughter go on hunting trips!"

"My daughter Dean! My daughter! You weren't here for the last ten years so she isn't our daughter she's my daughter Dean! So stop acting like her fucking father because basically you aren't!" She was shaking with anger now

"Yeah, I wasn't here for ten years but who's fault is that!"

"In the end: yours. Yours because of what you did ten years ago!"

"I apologized for that!"

At that she laughed, "You just don't apologize for raping someone Dean! That's a scar I'm going to have the rest of my life! I was raped by the guy I had fallen in love with! Don't you get it, it's not that simple."

Dean froze at the words 'fallen in love with'. Hails shook her head and sat in the nearby chair. She buried her face in her hands began to erupt in sobs. Sam, who was watching the whole scene, walked over to her and put a comforting hand on her back. She jumped up quickly and ran down the hall and into her room. She slammed the door shut. Dean closed his eyes briefly and sat on the couch.

"Wow," said Sam

"Shut the hell up," muttered Dean

Sam looked at him and shook his head, "I'm sorry for doing this, you're my brother and I would usually stick with you during anything but she's right and you have to realize that."

"I know she's fucking right Sam! What do you think I am a fucking idiot! I feel like shit for what I did and after a figured out she had loved me I feel much, much worse."

"Get up," Sam said and Dean looked up at him, "Get up now."

"What the hell Sam?"

"I said get up now. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, the only person you should be feeling sorry for is her. So get the hell up and talk to her because I'm done playing comforter or the shoulder to cry on."

Sam never took his eyes off Dean's as he got up. Dean tried to stare him down like he had all of his life but this time it wouldn't work: he knew it and Sam knew it.

"You are kidding me right?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding?"

Dean shook his head and grinned, "You've got some nerve saying stop feeling sorry for yourself when you are over here moping around because of Jess."

"Don't go there."

"Or what: you're going to beat my ass? Get real. Oh, poor me, my girlfriend died above my bed. I'm so lonely. Oh give me some attention like she always did."

"You know what: I've had enough."

Sam raised his fist and punched Dean in the nose. Dean looked up at him and then down at the blood on his hand.

"Big mistake little brother."