If I Were a Herald

Chapter 11

Snow Magic

A/N (10/23/05): I never could stand a sad ending. There's this song, "Snow Magic," and it's really a very beautiful song—except for the ending. Because this story is based on and inspired by songs, I figured I'd dedicate a chapter to setting things to rights.

A/N (10/30/05): Halloween PCP was yesterday. Excellent chance for me to observe drunken people dancing. So I'm going to go back and edit 307 Ale, if you want to read it again. If not, I may include some of the same descriptions in the next chapter. With less alcohol consumption. Other than that, I now have my songs on itunes and WMP, so I should be able to send them to people if I'm given im sn's.

Disclaimer: Don't own the song. Don't own the story. The last couple verses, however, are mine. The ones where everything works out.

Nawyn: Yeah, those Trainees really needed someone to show them how to have a good time. But no love triangles. Jacoby and Jorjie were just friends.

Fireblade K'Chona: All hell did break loose. Unfortunately, I wasn't there to see it happen. And I believe I sent you the songs, tell me if you got them.

"I'm freezing," I whined for what was probably the hundredth time that day. Circuit was a bad idea. A very bad idea. I was from Florida, for crying out loud. Snow was great, snow was wonderful, but not when the godawful stuff fell from the sky every godscursed day. And Whites were not designed with warmth in mind. If I ever got back to Haven, I was going to get out my Duct Tape jacket suit and wear it every day. I might stink to high Havens, but at least I'd be warm. I hadn't been truly warm since that first day after we left Haven, and that trip had involved problems of its own. I'd had a head the size of Texas that pounded like the drum in a heavy metal band from all the booze I'd had the night before.

"You're always freezing," Corwin said good-naturedly. "Look, there's a waystation. I know a way to make you warm."

"Forget it. I'll build a fire."

"Aww, come on."

"I said, forget it. I doubt you could find a priest out in this godforsaken country to marry us."

"What is it with you and marriage?"

"A vow I made to myself before I came to Valdemar."

"Where are you from, anyway?"

"Somewhere far south of here." I sniffed at the air. "Storm coming."

"How do you know? The sky's been the same slate-gray color all afternoon."

"I just know. Smells a bit different here in the north, but I can still tell a bad storm when I smell one." I grinned in anticipation. "It'll be a real monster."

"Better get the fire ready, then."

:You should just let him warm you: Lyrna said. :He is handsome.:

:Yeah, and all the other Trainees were mooning over him.: I Mindspoke Lyrna rather than speak aloud so that Corwin wouldn't hear.

:I seem to recall a certain brown-haired Trainee mooning over him as well.:

:Just shut up, horseface. I don't need a glorified pony sticking her overlarge nose into my love life. Yes, he's hot as hell. Yes, he's a wonderful person. No, I'm not going to screw him. Maybe if he looked more like that pirate...:

:Oh, of course. The pirate you're still dreaming about. Very entertaining dreams.:

:Eavesdropper. And don't try to go innocent on me. I have natural shields, I don't project when I'm asleep.:

:You still haven't seen his face, so how do you know what he looks like:

:His body, you gurhurt. Corwin just isn't muscular enough. Besides, Jorjie likes him.: My roommate had been so jealous when she learned I was going out on patrol with none other than the hottest Herald around. She'd practically flown into a rage over seeing me dancing with him on the wall.

Corwin handed me an armload of logs for the fire, then went back out to gather more. I arranged the logs in a tent-shape, then spread the kindling around them. For about five minutes I wrestled with flint and steel before finally giving it up as a lost cause. The twigs were too damp from the snow, which wasn't actually that cold and was partially melted. I just happened to be skinny as all get-out with no padding on me whatsoever. Glancing back to make sure that Corwin was nowhere in sight, I took out my lighter and set fire to the twigs. This time they caught.

Ten minutes later, when Corwin returned with another armload of logs, I was still shivering. It was a cold-frozen winter when they never saw the sun…. Well, at least this isn't bloody Antarctica, although it certainly feels cold enough.

Gradually the fire warmed us, eating away at the chill of the winter air.

"Where are we, exactly?" I asked, taking out my map.

"For the last candlemark we've been in the Forest of Sorrows." Corwin watched me, probably expecting me to panic.

Oh, so that's why I've felt eyes on my back. Other than the Vrondi, I mean. "Vanyel's forest. Did you know that his ghost resides here?"

"Folktales," Corwin dismissed what he thought to be groundless concerns.

"Not folktales. Truth. Maybe I can persuade him to make an appearance." I closed my eyes and concentrated, sending out my Mage-Gift. Vanyel would have to answer that. There were no Herald-Mages, at least not that he knew of, so magic in his forest could only mean danger. Rather risky for me, but I'd never been very wise when it came to taking risks.

Vanyel came with full manifestation. Column of light, solidifying into a pearly shape that took on the features of Johnny Depp. Had to be Vanyel. "Who goes there?" Vanyel demanded.

"Heyla yourself, Van-ashke," I replied. "I'm Herald Trainee Kali. Corwin here didn't believe that you really existed."

"Corwin here" had turned pale, the same shade as Vanyel, all blood drained from his face.

"Bright Havens," I said to him. "You look as if you'd seen a ghost."

Corwin laughed shakily. "V-Vanyel Ashkevron?"

"That would be me. Which one of you used magic?"

I raised a hand. "That would be me."

"I didn't think the people of Valdemar were ready for magic yet."

"They're not. I'm not of Valdemar."

Vanyel acknowledged that comment with a tilt of his head. "Well, you need to learn grace with your Gift. You're blundering about like a child with a hammer."

I shrugged. "I don't get much of a chance to practice in Valdemar. Your damned Vrondi keep watching me with their annoying little eyes."

With a last wink at me, Vanyel disappeared.

"See? I told you he was real."

The storm blew itself out around midmorning the next day. I was frozen solid. It felt like I'd never be warm again. Shivers raced down my spine and across my arms. I couldn't feel my fingers or my toes, even when I stubbed one so badly I worried I'd broken it.

We had packed our things and prepared to leave when I felt a tug in my Gift. Not magic, but Empathy. Overwhelming sadness, regret and loss. It was not my problem, but perhaps I could help. "Someone out there is in need of comfort. I must find him," I said to Corwin.

He nodded. It was the Herald's way to help those in need. I mounted Lyrna, settled the packs more comfortably about my legs, and gave her the command to walk. Deeper into the woods we went. :I hope you remember where we've been, 'cause I'm lost: I Mindsent to my Companion.

:You concentrate on where we're going, I'll remember where we've been: Lyrna assured me.

The tug grew stronger the further into the woods we went, until I came upon a clearing with a young warrior sobbing in the snow. I dismounted and went to him. "Hey, I'm Herald Trainee Kali. What is your name?"

"Alexi," he replied.

Young Alexi, proud Alexi—

"You can't be the warrior in the song," I said without thinking.

"Song? What song?"

And so I sang it for him, the song I'd learnt at that last tavern.

Not so much as a smile graced his handsome face, which could have rivaled Corwin's for beauty. "I didn't realize they'd written a song about it."

"All songs should have a happy ending," I said as I knelt beside him. "Perhaps I can help."

"Not even a Herald can bring my love back to me."

I remembered a spell, one of shapechanging. "I know a spell that can help you, but I can't work it alone." Inwardly, I cursed myself for not paying more attention to the spells I'd read about.

"Then call Vanyel," Corwin suggested. "He was a great Herald-Mage."

When the spirit manifested, Alexi did not so much as flinch. "What now?" Vanyel asked good-naturedly. "This lad not believe in me either?"

"I need your help," I said seriously. "There's a wolf somewhere in this forest, a white bitch-queen, who wrought a spell once to change her into a maid."

Vanyel frowned. "I remember her. She came to me for help, and I told her I would change her, on one condition. She reneged on our agreement."

"Vanyel, you of all people should know that sometimes one must kill. She was saving Alexi's life. You must help me change her back."

"I have not the power. I am no longer among the living; my energy must go to protecting Valdemar."

"I have the power, Vanyel. What I need is the knowledge. And for you to find the wolf and bring her here."

"Not everything has a happy ending. You may not be strong enough."

"I don't care. I built a Gate from Earth to Valdemar with neither aid nor instruction. I may be untutored, but you can teach me."

"I cannot show you—" Vanyel began, but I interrupted him.

"So get in my head and show me. And find that wolf."

I stood with my hands on my hips and glared at him, trying not to feel ridiculous.

"Very well. I've already called the wolf. Now open your mind."

I did so, and he showed me how to work the spell. This time it was a spell requiring even greater power, one to turn her into a maiden permanently, so that she and Alexi might live out their lives together. By the time the wolf loped into the clearing, I was ready. I worked the spell, careful to make every aspect perfect. I would have enough power or I would not.

Finally I was finished, and I cast the spell upon the wolf. She shimmered and changed, becoming a fair moon-kissed maiden. With a cry, Alexi gathered her against him. I swayed, exhausted, and fainted into Corwin's arms. As the light faded from my eyes, I thought to say, "Tell no one of what happened here today."

Then one day into the forest two young Heralds chanced to roam.
They were searching for a shelter and they found Alexi's home.
So he told them his sad story, and the mage-lass offered aid:
"I will help you, young Alexi, reunite with your fair maid."

So she called on Herald Vanyel, and his aid she did entreat.
"You must help me, Herald Vanyel, aid this man I chanced to meet.
For his love is in the forest, trapped inside a wolfen form.
We must change her to a maiden, icy cold but loving warm."

Young Alexi, sad Alexi, they will find your lover soon.
They will change her to a maiden by the light of yonder moon.

Young Alexi was so grateful when the Herald offered aid.
And he showed no fear or hatred for the long-dead Herald-Mage.
Herald Vanyel found the wolf-queen and he bid her come anon.
"Young Alexi is in the forest, and he grieves when you are gone."

Came the wolf-queen to the clearing, bright and clear and white as snow.
And the Herald worked her magic, wrought a spell in moonlight's glow.
And the mage said to Alexi, "Live in happiness once more
With your lover there beside you as you once had done before."

Young Alexi, fair Alexi, with his lover once again.
Thanked the Herald for her kindness, and the ending of his pain.