If I Were a Herald Chapter 35: Born Pirate, a valdemar universe fanfic

If I Were a Herald

Chapter 35

Born Pirate

A/N (12/18/05): I figured it was about time that Herald Kali got hit over the head with a board. Since she's been so dense lately. So I decided to have Jacoby take matters into his own hands.

A/N (12/18/05): Finally got around to writing the "Born Country" parody, like I promised.

A/N (12/18/05): Nobody got the Viggo quote. It was "My horse likes you," from Hidalgo. Come on, people, it was in the preview as well, which came with the PotC DVD.

A/N (12/19/05): Last night I filled my brain full of romantic mush. A romance novel full of love poetry. Didn't even get through the whole thing. It was very badly written. But I know the ending anyway. The real bandit was the guy called Nick. It was pretty obvious from the beginning. Unless the author was completely inept—a definite possibility. So I then read another novel, by an author who's usually pretty good. But Tempt the Devil must have been one of her earlier works, because it was rebelliously contrary to the form of the romance novel (the pirate, amazingly, wasn't out for revenge), and it had lots and lots of weak dialogue. At least the beginning was good. The first line is, "It was a terrible day to die—was there ever a good one?" All of which is to explain why I needs must take a short break and fill my head full of some halfway-decent books, or I fear my writing will suffer. Unfortunately, I tend to write what I read. Luckily I'm a fast reader. The trick is finding a good romance book. Ye gods! The drivel people will publish. I'm sometimes amazed that anyone is capable of writing such nonsense. Were I to try to write as badly as some authors do, I would die from the sheer agony of it long before I finished the book. And then to have to read it over…. Anyhoo, I've been reading Terry Pratchett—I'd like to get him to write a satirical romance, now wouldn't that be something—which may help me regain my footing. He certainly is good at making fun of stereotypes. The humor is slightly more pointed than mine, but after romantic drivel it's a definite breath of freshly polluted air.

A/N (12/20/05): My chosen treatment for my malady didn't work. I have come to the conclusion that to cure myself I must read something actually worth reading. Like Mercedes Lackey. I will spend tomorrow re-reading Take a Thief. I've been reading some Terry Pratchett and planning a satirical romance, so some of that is also showing in my writing. I'm letting it, for now. Because there have been some satirical undertones throughout the story. That's what the whole "I know this plot" was about. Because romances all have the same plot. And the same lead male character—a guy who'll chase anything in skirts, until he meets the female lead—and then he'll do anything to get into her skirts. Preferably without marriage. Until he falls madly in love. There's also always a jealous male, and often a jealous female, as well. Oh, and at least one of the characters is rich. Someday I'm going to write a romance about commoners. They'll live happily ever after as somebody's serfs, or something like that.

A/N (12/20/05): Managed to finish the chapter without actually reading Take a Thief. It's not (quite) drivel. At least that's what I'm hoping. You tell me.

Fireblade: I'm on vacation, too, but that doesn't stop my parents from conscripting me to help move bookshelves. One of the bookstores in the area is having a closeout sale (all books are free, all bookshelves are for sale), and they came up with the brilliant idea of turning my sister's room into a library. Oh, and my mom's stealing the bookcase outside my room to use for her movies…argh! So I had to buy myself a new bookshelf. It's not going to hold all my books, but at least I'll be able to keep some in my room.

Blood-Covered-Ivory: I think it's something of both. She's afraid to get her hopes up. Silly girl.

Nawyn: Yeah, Jacoby's a little quicker on the uptake than Herald Kali was. Now it's time for him to hit her over the head and drag her away to make mad, passionate love to her for days…except he knows that if he does that, she'll kill him. But knock her over the head is still a viable option. Maybe a couple whops will bring her to her senses.

Dark Angel Lytha: I so agree with you on the Christmas issue. My boyfriend is an atheist, but he celebrates Hanukkah, so I got him a Hanukkah present and he got me a Christmas present. I'm of a mind to start yelling "Happy Saturnalia!" to everyone I see. Because nobody celebrates Saturnalia anymore, so it's going to offend or confuse everyone. Cute? Okay, I can live with that. It was supposed to be poignant, but Herald Kali and Jacoby are kinda cute.

Cool breeze and crisp ocean white-caps,
Sailors working in the rig.
Cook's fixed salamagundi,
And the minstrel plays a quick and lively jig.
The brethren must be close upon this sea,
They're always looking out for you and me.

I was born pirate, and that's what I'll always be;
Like the dolphins and the seagulls, wild and free.
I've got a hundred years of outlaw running through me blood.
I was born pirate, and this ocean's what I love.

Moonlight and you here beside me.
Starlight shining off that endless sea.
Wind blows like an angel's caresses,
This is all I ever want to be.
It might be wrong, but I don't give a damn,
Thievery is part of who I am.

In the dark, quiet hours before dawn, I dreamt.

It was the old dream, where I was upon Lake Evendim, in a pirate ship. The dream I hadn't had since I first arrived on the lake shore. I'd sort of expected the proximity to increase its occurrence. Wrong again.

But now…now I dreamt. It wasn't too different from the reality of life aboard ship. No different at all, really. Except that I wasn't in the brig. I was on deck, alone. A deck that looked exactly like the Bloodred Falcon. Too similar. Surely there should be some differences.

A child's voice caused me to turn my head. "Mommy, Mommy!" Marky launched himself into my arms. Dear, sweet child. "Mommy, is this a pirate ship?"

I laughed with the sheer joy of seeing my child again. "Yes indeed. A pirate ship."

Marky wriggled out of my embrace to run about the deck. He literally ran into Jacoby, who was staring off into the distance.

Wait a minute. Jacoby? Okay, sure, I had a thing for him. A thing nearly bordering on obsession. But what was he doing in my dreams? Wasn't this supposed to be the pirate dream?

"Hey, I know you!" Marky giggled. "You gave me a sword. Arr!"

No, wait. It was the other pirate who gave him a sword.

Jacoby grinned at my son. "That's right, you little monster. You remembered."

"Can we play swordfight?" Marky begged.

"You're incorrigible, you know that? I'll bet your daddy has his hands full with you."

"I don't have a daddy," Marky informed the pirate. "Will you be my daddy?"

Jacoby reacted to the innocent question as if he'd been struck. "I, uh—ye'll 'ave to ask yer mommy abou' that. She don' seem to like me much."

That wasn't true at all. I liked him altogether too much. To keep that from showing through, I demanded, "What are you doing in my dream?"

"Yer dream? It be as much mine as yers. Ye still don' get it, do ye?"

My hands found their way to my hips. It was one of my favorite positions. The defiance of the gesture gave me courage to face the world. "No, I don't. So why don't you explain it to me."

"Think, songbird. Yer smarter than this. I had hoped that just me presence in yer dream would be enough to spark yer memory."

He was sparking my memory, but surely that's not what he wanted me to remember. He couldn't be—

He was. I blushed furiously. What an idiot I'd been, not to have seen. It was so obvious. Staring me right in the face. I'd even begun to make the comparisons. It was just, I suppose I hadn't really expected to encounter him. Not in real life. Certainly not fall in love with him.

But I hadn't. Fallen in love with him, that is. Maybe falling, but certainly not fallen. Not past tense. Well, perfect tense, to be precise. But whatever.

"Ye were a Herald all along. That talkin' horse o' yers…"

"Lyrna is a Companion, and really wouldn't appreciate being called a horse."

"Right. She 'elped me rescue ye. Twice. Dunno why I never thought to question a talkin' horse. Unnatural. But ye—ye knew I was a pirate. Ye had to. Ye even said it."

"I knew," I confirmed. "I don't really give a fig about laws. Back home, my mother was a judge, but that didn't stop me from breaking any law that stood in my way. What matters is the heart. The spirit. Laws are meant to protect innocents. Well, to protect everyone. I wouldn't steal from a starving man—but then, neither would you."

"He doesn't deserve you, Mom," my other son Jaym said. Trust him to show up in my dream as well. And there were Gloria and Melissa. Gloria would be—it was late June now, so she would be twelve. I'd missed her birthday. I was surprised to see how much Jaym had matured while I was away. He'd grown up on me when my back was turned. Fourteen and a half—and much more mature than my brother had been at that age. Much more mature than I'd been at that age. "If he can't give up pirating to be with you, that's his problem. But you can't compromise yourself for him."

Now, finally, the faces were clear. Why had they been blurred before? One of the many mysteries of the Dreamscape.

Just when I thought everyone had arrived—after all, no one else had ever intruded upon our dreams—Jimmy made an appearance. Yes, of course. Jacoby's son. And now the whole family was here.

"Who're you?" Jaym demanded. I noticed absently that there were far too many J names here. Who would ever keep them straight?

"Jimmy," the younger boy replied. He jerked his head at Jacoby. "He's me dad. An' ye?"

"Jaym. She's my mom."

The two boys sized each other up, determining whether they'd have to fight. Melissa offered Jimmy a shy smile. Jaym relaxed marginally and gave the younger boy a smile of his own.. If his adopted sister, soon to be a Herald-Trainee, thought Jimmy was okay, then there was no reason to fight.

One by one, the children disappeared. Until it was only the two of us on the deck of the ship. Jacoby's ship.

"I wish things could 'ave been different," he said, longing evident in his voice.

The desire to touch him was just too much. My pirate was Jacoby. My head was still spinning with that knowledge. Jacoby, for whom I was falling. Jacoby, the man of my dreams. Destiny had brought us together. Surely it wasn't too much to ask that Destiny keep us there?

I practically threw myself into his arms. In his embrace, I felt free to be myself. The young girl who'd been crushed under the weight of a Herald's duty was able to come forth. Sure she'd made herself known from time to time, but she'd disappeared after the incident in Karse. Torture maims the body, but it kills the soul.

"Oh, songbird." He pulled me close and just held me.

Dreams were different than reality. In dreams, there was no annoying maidenhead to deal with. No consequences. And Lyrna had just said to seduce him, not that it had to be in reality. I snatched the opportunity. "We can't have—what we want—when we're awake. Why not now? Nobody will ever know but us. And Lyrna," I added as an afterthought. "But that's okay. She likes you."

"Ye on'y had to ask."

Waking in the brig was something of a disappointment after that very vivid dream. But I got over it. At least I no longer had to be lonely at night. I could just search out Jacoby in the Dreamscape. We might even be able to find a way to keep the kids from intruding upon our dreams.

I stretched out a kink that had formed in my back sometime during the night. Funny. In my dream, I'd been exercising quite enough that such a knot should never have formed. But there it was.

As I stretched, I sent my Gift searching for new ley-lines to tap for power. Instead, I found—

Another Herald.

:Heyla.:

I almost recoiled from the contact. It was certainly the last thing I'd been expecting. :Heyla back atcha.:

:I'm Herald Vandir, on the ship Hindsight

:Herald Kali.: I didn't give the name of the ship. :What are you doing out on Lake Evendim? Is your Companion with you:

:I could ask the same of you: he replied with amusement. :No, my Companion isn't with me; Helna elected to stay on dry land. A ship is far too cramped for a Companion, anyway, as I expect you discovered.:

:Yeah; Lyrna says she misses me, but she doesn't envy me the cramped quarters. I don't see why; the ship itself might be small, but the lake is endless.:

Vandir executed a mental shrug. :As for why I'm here, I'm searching for pirates. King Roald has gotten rather tired of pirate attacks interrupting Valdemaran shipping.:

:Heh. Try living on an ocean.: King Roald needed to get himself a life. Lake Evendim didn't get enough Valdemaran commerce to make stopping the pirates worthwhile. But then, this was Valdemar. People here could be kind of like America when it came to stopping crime. Oh, and terrorism. Not that I objected to the war on terrorism, per se—which was probably over, by this time. Actually, come to think of it, probably not. Whoever had replaced Bush as president had probably found somewhere else to attack.

:So, what brings you here:

There was no possibility of lying mind-to-mind. I could evade the question, but couldn't lie. :I was after a guy who called himself Mortimer. Nasty piece of work. Bent on causing mischief in Valdemar.:

:You get him:

:Yeah, eventually. Took me a while.:

I withdrew from the contact. So. Vandir, aboard the Hindsight. And he was looking for pirates. And he was in the area. Quite close, if the strength of the mental contact was any indication.

Right nearby, I sensed—wonder of wonders—a ley-line I could tap. A good one, with plenty of power flowing through it. My reserves filled quickly, leaving me feeling stronger than I had in days.

The ship turned sharply, throwing me against the wall. We were now heading in the direction of the Hindsight. That meant trouble. The lookout must have spotted the other ship. And now Jacoby was going to fall for the trap. And I couldn't allow that.

:Oh no you don't.: My Companion was also awake. While she approved of my nighttime liaison, it seemed she disapproved of my awakening emotional attachment.

:I thought you wanted me to hook up with Jacoby: I said pointedly.

:Yes, I want you to "get in his pants," as you like to say. But that doesn't change the fact that he's a pirate, and it's your duty as a Herald to make sure he falls for this trap.: In retrospect, she sure knew how to push my buttons. She's never actually confirmed it, but I have a strong suspicion that Lyrna knew all along about Jacoby and me. Companions and their secrets. I guess since her nature wasn't secret from me, she had to find something else to take its place. What she said was the perfect truth—but she also didn't say it would be wrong of me to help him. And if she hadn't spoken up just then, I might not have worked up the resolve to warn him in time to make a difference.

Not that it helped, in the end.

But I also wouldn't have admitted what I admitted then.

:To the nine hells with my duty as a Herald: I snarled back. :I didn't ask for any of this. By all rights I should be with him on deck, a legitimate member of his crew.: As if legitimacy had anything to do with pirating.

"Fetch Captain Jacoby," I ordered Kent. Still stuck with guard duty. Although really, he was getting off easy. It might seem to be the most dangerous job (who knew when the Herald would blast open the door to her cell), but it was also the least physically taxing. "I need to speak with him. It's urgent."

Lyrna was right, of course. He was a pirate. A criminal. They were all criminals, even little Jimmy. But then who am I to try and put their actions to the test, when I have done the same and am no better than the rest?

Jacoby arrived in record time. Without preamble, I said, "You can't attack the Hindsight."

"Oh? An' why not? Would it offend yer Herald sensibilities?" Something else struck him. "An' how'd ye know the ship's name?"

"I'm a thief, not a Herald. I have no sensibilities. My Companion's on the brink of disowning me."

:The term is repudiate, not disown. And you're absolutely mad. Jacoby's a pirate.:

:And a good man. You'd better get over it, because I've fallen hopelessly in love.: I realized with a start that it was true. Fallen, not falling. Perfect tense. "And the reason you can't attack is the same reason I know the ship's name. It's a trap."

:Finally! I was beginning to wonder how long it would take you to realize it. You've been extremely dense. Now what are you going to do about it:

:I'm going to help him in whatever ways I can.:

"A trap," he repeated, with a skeptical lift to his brow.

"Yes, a trap. There is a Herald on that ship with a troop of guardsmen, just waiting for pirates to attack." I gripped the bars of the cell and let my desperation creep into my voice. "Please, Jacoby, I don't want you to die."

Too late. A cry came from above; the ship had been spotted. "I'm sorry, songbird. But I can't do as ye ask. The crew would never allow it."

The crew; of course. This was a pirate ship, after all. "Damn them. Damn them all to hell!"

Jacoby turned and walked away.

Sounds of fighting from above frayed my already frazzled nerves. The only consolation I could cling to was my conviction that I would know if anything happened to Jacoby.

Vandir found me in the brig, considering whether or not I should blast open the door. I noted—dispassionately—that he was extraordinarily handsome. Probably shaych. All of Mercedes Lackey's characters are hot, and they're all either shaych or taken. Sometimes both. "Herald Kali? Is that you?"

Well, of all the questions to ask. Of course it was me! Who else would be in the brig of a pirate ship, worrying over the damn captain who'd put her there in the first place? "No, I'm a pirate," I replied sarcastically. "They ran out of cabins, so they put me in here." If only they'd trusted me.

Vandir pried open the cell door with his knife. Freedom. Wonderful. I picked up my sword and hefted it. I was reluctant to go up on deck, reluctant to join the fighting. For whom would I fight? For the Heralds, or the pirates?

"You really should have left me in there. I was born pirate."

"What was that?"

"I was born pirate. It's a song. Well, actually, the song's called 'Born Country,' I just wrote a parody of it. I had lots of leisure time in the brig. I was born pirate, and that's what I'll always be; like the dolphins and the seagulls, wild and free. I've got a hundred years of outlaw running through me blood. I was born pirate, and this ocean's what I love."

A clenching of my heart quickened my steps. Jacoby was in danger.

Of course he's in danger, you nitwit, he's in the middle of a blasted battle!

On deck, the battle raged. It should have been hard to spot Jacoby amidst the commotion, but it wasn't. My eyes went unerringly to the place where he stood.

A sword sliced down toward his unprotected neck.

No!

Without even thinking, I Fetched the weapon away from him, leaving a very confused guardsman to stare at his empty hands.

Now I knew what I had to do. Jacoby was in danger—unless he was engaged in fighting me. I would never hurt him.

Determinedly I made my way toward him. One step. Another. Each inch gained was a struggle. Neither the pirates nor the guardsmen seemed keen on letting me through. The guardsmen because they didn't recognize me. The pirates because they did.

Jacoby spun around, looking for another opponent, only to find my sword in the way. "So ye got out." He didn't sound all that surprised.

"Nothing but my own will kept me in that cell. Had I wanted, I could have blasted it open days ago." Block, parry, riposte. Try to keep my footing as my insides melted to mush from the heat of his gaze. And various other romantic drivel.

"So why didn't ye?"

"I said, had I wanted." I knew damn well how to keep my lies straight—and believable. It didn't change the fact that they were lies, but it did keep people from becoming suspicious. "I didn't particularly want to face a shipful of angry pirates."

"So now that yer with friends ye feel safe."

"Friends who would kill you and consider it all in a days work. As long as I'm the one fighting you, we're both safe."

"If that's the case, why're we fightin'?" He pushed my sword out of the way and drew me close. My world narrowed to encompass only him. Some might refer to it as tunnel vision. Not romance writers; the phrase isn't romantic enough. But some people.

For me, it was rather like I was fainting. When that happens, my vision narrows to a point, then goes altogether. I'm not swooning, am I? I'd better not be swooning. Drooling is okay, but I draw the line at swooning. Sure I was in love, but I was not a fainting violet. I just had low blood pressure, that's all.

Jacoby pressed his lips to mine. The contact was a lifeline to reality—except how could something so wonderful be real? How could it not? This, more than the magic, more than the ship, was a dream come true. I was in love. Did he care for me as much as I cared for him? It didn't matter. I could win his heart. He'd come to my rescue in the fight against Mortimer. At least I knew he cared.

"Let the lady go." Reality intruded in the form of Herald Vandir, bringing with it the clash of swords all around us. I couldn't feel the prick of the sword against Jacoby's back, but I knew it was there. How, exactly, I couldn't say for sure. I speculated Empathy.

Jacoby released me slowly, reluctantly. "Yer 'lady' was a willin' participant in that kiss."

"No Herald would willingly kiss a pirate," Vandir said coldly. "Go ahead, Captain, tell your men to stop fighting."

My pirate didn't look about to obey. "Please, Jacoby?" I asked softly. "For me. There's no sense in this slaughter. I'll find a way to get you all free. Somehow. I promise."

"Stop fightin', men!" Jacoby commanded. All over the ship weapons fell to the deck. To me, he said, "I'm holdin' ye to that promise."

Just to prove Vandir wrong, I threw my arms around Jacoby and kissed him. Probably not the wisest of moves, but then, I wasn't always the wisest of girls. "I was born pirate, Vandir. I just want you to know that not all pirates are bad. Think on that a while. And one more thing—don't you dare hurt Jacoby. Hell hath no fury like a woman in love, and the female of the species is more deadly than the male."

"What are you saying?"

"I was born pirate, and that's what I'll always be; like the dolphins and the seagulls, wild and free. I got a hundred years of outlaw runnin' through me blood. I was born pirate, an' this pirate's who I love."

Author's observation: Half this chapter seems to be in italics. Ah well. Mindspeech conversations are just so much fun. And I really do adore Lyrna. That's why Herald Kali keeps calling her "horse."