Title: Two for One
Chapter 5: The Duelist's Problems
Warning: This story is AU, contains OC's, OOC characters and Yaoi, so if ya don't like, don't read! I'm getting tired of typing this!
Disclaimer: Not mine nor will it ever be mine, sadly.
I will be making a few comments this chapter so if you see (something in parentheses) then that's me! By the way this is Yugi talking to Yami /hi/ and this is Yami talking to Yugi /hi/.
Joey was freezing his fucking butt off! He was in the middle of what seemed like Antarctica with nothing but a T-shirt and jeans! The last thing he remembered was Kaiba talking to those two kids and then whoosh, here he was. He had been standing here rubbing his arms for the last two minutes and nothing had happened.
He felt like pulling his hair and screaming! First some wacko brat decides to send them to some freak world then he had to deal with Kaiba figuring out his little secret and now he was struck standing in the middle of nowhere!
Joey began pounding his foot in the snow, smashing it into a fine powder. Maybe he was just taking his sexual frustration out on the ground. So what if Kaiba was hot and cute and- no! Stop thinking about that! Joey shook his head and stomped his foot harder.
He was so deep in thought (pfft, ya right) that he didn't notice when a man appeared behind. He turned abruptly when he heard someone clear their throat.
Joey stared at the huge monster of a man in front of him. It was Judgeman! But that couldn't be, he could have sworn that he would be facing the Big Five.
Joey glared. "Wha' do ya want!"
Judgeman chuckled. "Why Joseph, I'm your partner in this little game."
Joey looked blank. "I though' I was facin' one of the Big Five."
"I am one of the Big Five Joseph. I am Johnson the attorney of the Big Five."
Joey sweat dropped, "I though' tha' all the Big Five were humans. I mean ya' guys all looked like humans when ya were talkin' before but I guess you were a dragon for a while so..."
Johnson's mouth dropped open; 'No one could possibly be so stupid as to not figure out that I don't really look like this.' He looked over at Joey, who was staring open mouthed at a piece of dust flying through the air, 'Actually, scratch that, this loser could be stupid enough.'
Johnson cleared his throat drawing Joey's attention back to him. "Yes, well I don't really look like this Joseph. I am the monster I have chosen to use to duel for me."
Joey looked horrorstruck. "Does that mean that I have ta' turn inta' tha' monster I choose too! Even if it's a girl or some kind of hideous monster?
'This kid is so stupid that it's scary.' Johnson smirked, 'Hmm, I could use this in my favor.'
"No of course you don't have to change into your monster." Johnson said smiling. "But make sure that you don't cheat, you do remember that Kou-kun said that you could only pick the top card of your deck for your one monster, right?"
"He did?"
"Yes, I'm surprised you don't remember." Johnson cackled at his lie. Of course being a lawyer meant that he had to lie a lot but that didn't mean that he didn't enjoy it. There was a slim chance for Joseph to win to begin with but now there was no way that the other was going to win. The chances that the boy had a monster with higher attack points than Judgeman at the top of his deck were slim to none.
Joey was feeling more and more nervous about this. He had no idea what kind of monsters were on the top of his deck, he hadn't checked his deck since his duel with Rishid. He guessed he would just have to do what Yugi always said and trust the heart of the cards. (This always made me laugh! Hehe)
"Ready Joseph?"
Joey's eyes sharpened. "Anytime you are."
Johnson smirked once more. "Good then draw!"
Joey decided to take it slow. He closed his eyes and let his hand hesitate over his deck. 'Please let me draw a good card!' With his eyes still closed he drew the top card and held it in front of his eyes. Cracking them open he saw something green. Opening his eyes fully he saw the disfigured head of Ginzo staring back.
"Yes!" He jumped in the air and summoned his monster, "Your turn Johnson." It was Joey's turn to look smug.
Johnson's eyes widened. 'How is this possible! There should have been no way that he could get such a good card!' H began to reach for his deck were he knew he had a power booster at the top of his deck.
"Hey! No fair, tha's cheatin'." Joey had easily seen Johnson's movement; after all he had spent most of his life looking quickly to see if anyone had noticed that he had plucked their pockets.
Johnson knew that there was no way for him to cheat so he grudgingly dropped his hand at his side. Jinzo put his hands together and immediately bursts of electricity gathered in between them. It came shooting at Johnson causing him to fly back and drop the illusion of being a monster. He laid there for a second, a broken man with his glasses askew and his clothes burned.
It had only taken two seconds for Joey to beat Johnson and it took even less time then that for Johnson to get back up and disappear through yet another door. Leaving Joey all alone, so here he was once more standing in the freezing cold. Now that he thought about it he was even worse of then he had started…
"ARGHHHHHH!" he really hoped that he gave that brat Noah a killer headache.
-"Arghhhhh!" Tea glanced around as she thought she heard someone scream.
'Must have been my imagination,' she thought holding her head. All these weapons were finally starting to get to her; she guessed it was only natural after all she was surrounded by what could be called a deadly arsenal of weapons.
"Tea, I think we should get moving." She nodded at Shizuka as the other girl started to fidget.
"Yeah I think you're right, these things are starting to creep me out." She indicated to the guns and bombs hanging on all the walls.
Shizuka shivered. "Me too, where are we anyways?"
"I don't know but where ever we are I don't like it. Come on." Tea grabbed the other girl's hand and started to walk out of the warehouse.
She barely got three feet before a door planted itself right in her path. It opened to reveal a… penguin! Tea had never personally met the Big Five so she didn't exactly know what all of them looked like, but she could have sworn that none of them were penguins.
"Who are you?" She said suspiciously tightening her grip on Shizuka's hand and cautiously stepping in front of the girl just in case she needed protection.
The penguin bloated its chest proudly and clothes began appearing on him. He was now wearing a waistcoat and top hat along with the decorative bow tie to match.
"Awww, how cute! I've never seen a penguin with a bow tie before." Shizuka squealed from behind Tea's back.
The penguin straightened his bow tie. "Yes, I do have to admit that I am rather dashing aren't I."
Anzu did an anime fall, 'Great just what we really needed, a pompous penguin.'
"Anyways that's not why I'm here. I am really here to duel with one of you lovely ladies." Crump said wiggling his eye brows suggestively.
"One, Eww that's gross and two we're supposed to duel with someone from the Big Five, not a penguin." Tea said in disgust.
"I am a member of the Big Five! My name is Crump and I am the accountant for the Big Five. I just look like a penguin because this is the monster that I will be using in my duel."
"You're kidding right; we have to duel against a penguin?"
"Yes you do so one of you choose your monster so we can get started and I can take over one of those b-e-a-utiful bodies."
Tea and Shizuka felt a shiver of disgust travel through them as the penguin stared them up and down.
"You stay back Shizuka, I'll duel this perverted pheasant." Te said pushing the other back a little bit farther.
"Okay, good luck Tea." Shizuka cheered with an encouraging smile.
Crump looked impatient. (As impatient as a penguin can look that is) "Hurry up and choose your monster."
Te took her deck out of her duel disk and checked it over. She didn't know exactly how they were supposed to duel but she guessed that she would just have to choose her favorite card.
She quickly picked her card and set it on her disk. She could hear Crump burst into laughter as Shining Friendship came spiraling out in the form of a hologram.
"You expect to beat me with such a puny monster? That thing is so dinky." Crump said through cackles.
Tea was starting to blush, she knew that her card wasn't the strongest but it was the only card that truly reminder her of her friends. "Shut up you stupid bird!"
Crump stopped laughing and his face became serious. "You got it little missy, ready to duel?"
"Yes."
"Good then I attack your pathetic little fairy with my nightmare penguin!" Crump came flying towards her Shining Friendship beak first. The little fairy barely managed to dodge the lethal attack, only getting a small scratch on her side.
Crump flew back into his position on the field with a grin. "Hahahahahahahahahahahaha," the penguin burst into a fit of maniacal laughter freaking Tea out more than a little. "Now you've fallen into my trap! You see once a monster gets hurt by my nightmare penguin, they activate my babies' special ability."
"What's your monster's special ability?" Tea had a very bad feeling about this; there was no way that this would bode well for her.
"That would be that once my monster has harmed yours then yours must return to your hand for one turn."
"What! Then I lose!"
"I know my dear isn't it wonderful." Shining Friendship began to glow and was soon swept back into Tea's disk and she was left with no monsters on her side of the field.
"No… I don't want to lose my body." She wrapped her arms tightly around herself trying to gain comfort.
"Oh Tea, I'm so sorry!" Shizuka came running up and hugged the girl crying.
"Hehe I could have a bargain deal and take both of you, one for a body and the other for…other purposes." The penguin said drooling slightly at the thought. "It's too late to save yourselves!" He once more charged at Tea.
"Stop!" Crump stopped abruptly as Noah appeared in a flash behind him. "Crump, you have cheated in this game and are therefore disqualified!"
"No Noah-sama! I didn't cheat, I just bent the rules a little." Crump begged trying to fall to his knees but forgetting that as a penguin he didn't have any. He ended up slipping on his stomach and sliding in a circle.
"You failed to inform your opponent that according to the rules, you shouldn't have been able to attack her monster because hers was stronger than yours." Noah said staring down coldly at the circling penguin.
"Please Noah-sama forgive me, I beg of you give me one more chance." Crump pleaded managing to rise to his feet.
"No." A hole opened in the ground underneath Crump and the penguin disappeared into it screaming all the way down.
Noah looked over at the two girls with the same cold stare. "I'm very sorry that my associate treated you unfairly, I hope that you can forget his rudeness."
All that Tea and Shizuka could do was nod. Noah gave a brief nod back and walked through the door that had fallen in front of him.
When they were both sure he was gone they let go of each other.
"What just happened…" Tea asked in confusion.
"I don't exactly know but if that was Noah he doesn't seem that bad." Shizuka answered hesitantly.
"Yeah I guess so."
"Oh no!" Shizuka gasped smacking her forehead.
Tea looked back at her. "What's wrong?"
"We forgot to ask him if he knows were Mokuba-kun and Otogi-kun are."
"Oh well I guess it's too late now." Tea paused for a moment. "Hey Shizuka…"
"Yeah?"
"We still have no idea where we are."
-Yugi woke up lying in the middle of a clearing; he lifted himself into sitting position and rubbed his head. He had a killer headache and could barely remember anything that had happened.
He was reminding himself of the events that had taken place since they had entered the virtual when a lake popped up in front of him causing him to jump in surprise.
The young teen crawled towards the lake and stuck his hand into the cool icy depths. He drew his hand back quickly as he discovered that the water was boiling hot.
Sighing he plopped on his butt and crossed his legs. Setting his elbows on his knees he placed his face in his hands. "I guess it's just you and me lake. Now don't try any funny business cause you know I'm faster than I look. I could be like BAM and you wouldn't know what hit ya."
"I'll have to be careful then won't I." Yugi screamed as a body-less voice drifted acraoss the surface of the lake.
"Who's there!"
Slowly out of the water a monster appeared. Its clothes and mask reminding yugi of the stories he had heard when he was a child, the ones about mermaids and talking fish.
"I am Gansley, former Vice President of Business Strategy of the Big Five and I shall be your opponent." The creature was floating mere inches above the boiling water and its voice seemed to be more of a hiss than an actual voice. "Choose your card wisely for it is the only monster that you shall get."
"Okay, I accept your challenge. Let's duel!" Yugi looked through his deck searching for the one card that could help him the most.
/Yami, I need your help. Which card should I choose/ Yugi waited for a moment but Yami did not answer back. /Yami/
/Little Fluff/ The voice was deep and warm and seemed slightly different from Yami's.
/Little Fluff? You mean Kuriboh/
/Yes Aibou, Kuriboh is the one who can help you the most in this duel. /
/What do you mean me? Aren't you going to duel/
/No Yugi, this is your duel. Good luck/
Yami severed their connection leaving Yugi feeling slightly empty inside. He looked down at his cards and picked out Kuriboh. 'I hope that your right Yami cause if your not then I'm dead.'
"I play Kuriboh as my monster!" The little fluff ball pooped out in a cloud of smoke and did a little dance.
"Good luck winning with such a powerless monster." Gansley said with a smirk.
"Don't judge a book by its cover Gansley, it may end up being different then you thought."
"I will end this now!" He came sailing across the water making it part for him.
"Not so fast! Kuriboh, multiply!" Yugi set down the multiply card and millions of little Kuribohs came bursting out in little puffs. They all joined together and easily piled on top of Gansley sinking hin in the water he had moments again floated above.
After a second Gansley suck his head above the water gasping for air, He was now a man once again and was obviously being burnt by the water.
Crouched down and stuck his hand out to help the man out. "Are you okay?" He pulled the man out of the water and patted his back as he coughed out water.
Yugi flinched as Gansley struck him across the cheek. "How dare you cheat against me you little brat."
Yugi held his cheek as blood trickled from the corner of his mouth. "I didn't cheat! Kou-kun said that you could only choose one monster from your deck, he never said anything about magic cards."
"You tricked me then!" Gansley raised his fist again to attack Yugi but something grabbed his wrist.
Gansley looked up to see Noah standing above him. "Gansley, you have used unnessarsary force against your opponent. You're disqualified from this game. Noah let go of the older man's wrist and with of a wave of him hand, Gansley disappeared.
Noah looked over at Yugi. "I hope your cheeks okay."
Yugi blinked in surprise. "Yeah, it's fine."
"Good." Noah somehow managed to conjure yet another door and quickly made his exit.
Yugi was left sitting on the ground holding his stinging cheek. "That was weird."
TBC….
Haruka: Sorry that I had to do all the duels like that, next chapter will defiantly be more exciting.
I will fix this later but right now I have to go to school, yuck!
Koi-bara: Grabs her arm and starts dancing too yes it does! Thanx
XxSexItxX: I'll try my best with your request although I'm not very good at pairing.
SqareCool321: It sure took you a while this time didn't it? Don't worry I would update even if it's just for you hugs Hope you love it again!