A/N : Woah, 25 reviews on one chapter? You guys are the best! Big thanx to you all; TammyDevil666, Ape18, Baby Girl Geller-Green, spuffy-monica, Brandy, Moluvsnumber17, casey, kim, KelleyTheSelfToastablePopTart, souled-angel, Rebel Goddess, spbangel, amytherat, meagan, aej1085, Brunettepet, Lifes-Slayer, SpikeLvr, Melody Lane, artemis92, Spuffy2008, wicked-angel-413, funkydevil208, Amandamanda3, and bella-lover. You all like me now for the Spuffyness, but you might not so much now that it's over... but there will be more Spuffyness later, I swear. Hope you'll all keep reading through the hard times, cos the good stuff will be really good, I promise.
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 2

Buffy groaned as she woke up the next morning. It felt as if a samba band had set themselves up inside her head, using the interior of her skull to play on. She should have known better she realised, drinking like she had last night always led to bad hang-over-ness in the morning. Not that Buffy made a habit of drinking so much but last night had been... she frowned as she realised she couldn't entirely remember what had happened last night. She shifted her body in the bed and realised with some horror that she was naked. That was not normal, she thought, and neither was finding a man in the bed next to her that was not her husband!

"Oh God" she groaned silently not wanting to wake the bleached blond that lay beside her sleeping soundly still. She opened one eye to look at him again, and a million thoughts and feelings flowed through her as she began to remember last nights events. Nobody had ever wanted her like Spike had, nobody had ever made her feel so very alive. Angel never had, not even back when she was younger and believed herself to be in love with him.

With a sigh, Buffy manoeuvred herself out of the bed, careful not to disturb Spike. She found her clothes spread around the room where they had been thrown in the heat of passion. She wriggled into them, trying to remember if she had a purse with her or possibly a jacket. Her eyes passed by the clock on the stand by the bed. She cursed as she realised she was going to be late if she didn't hurry and with one final long look at the beautiful face of the man who'd made her feel so good, she let herself out of the room and ran down to the street.

Buffy was too hell-bent on getting home on time to be sad or happy about anything that happened last night. Long ago she'd realised there were things that mattered more than your own happiness, it was just last night that she seemed to have forgotten. A man whom she knew only by the nick-name of Spike had taken her to heaven and back, and that she would never forget as long as she lived, though she'd never see the guy again. He was headed back to England today, he had said, and so it was over. That was probably for the best Buffy realised, thinking no doubt the alcohol and such had made her time with him seem more special than it should've. It couldn't have been as amazing as she remembered, it just wasn't possible, or so she told herself. If it were true, she'd just left behind one incredible man that she was never going to see again, and that would make her crazier than anyone else in the world ever.

With a heavy sigh, Buffy let herself into the building where she lived and trudged up the three flights of stairs without stopping at the elevator. It was Out Of Order so often there was very little point in even trying it. The blonde stopped in the last stairwell, digging in her purse for a mirror. She made a face at the less than good-looking reflection and attempted to make herself look semi-presentable.

Buffy painted a smile on her face and knocked on her neighbours door.

"Buffy, hi" Jenny greeted her friend, letting her into the apartment.

"Thanks so much for doing this, Jenny" the blonde said gratefully, "I couldn't really let Will and Xander down and Angel was... kinda busy" she lied.

"Honestly, Buffy, it's fine" Jenny assured her, "Everybody needs to have some fun once in a while, maybe a few drinks. Even mothers"

Buffy smiled at her friends kindness, and whilst she agreed with what she was saying in principal she was starting to feel awfully guilty. Jenny thought she'd had an innocent night out, had a few drinks, gone home to bed and come around here next morning to pick up her little boy, all innocent as can be. If she knew she was technically an adulteress, she might not be so fast to defend her, despite the fact she'd never been Angel's biggest fan.

"Mommy!" a little voice yelled, breaking Buffy's train of thought.

"There's my boy" she grinned as she crouched down to the six year olds level and he barrelled into her arms, "You have a nice time with Aunt Jenny, Michael?" she asked as she hugged her son.

"Uh-huh" he nodded, grinning widely, "We watched cartoons and then Aunt Jenny read me a story before I went to sleep" he enthused, "and then I had pancakes for breakfast for when I got up"

"Sounds good" Buffy smiled genuinely at last.

Michael meant so much to her, more than anything else in the whole world, including her husband and herself. A part of her was feeling wretched right now for leaving him with Jenny whilst she had the most amazing sex of her life with a complete stranger, but it wasn't as if her boy had come to anymore harm than he would have if she'd stayed at the party and gone home to her own bed.

"Come on, starshine" she smiled once again, picking her son up from the floor, "Let's get you home"

"You're not gonna stay and tell me about the party?" Jenny frowned as she handed Buffy the bag with Michael's pyjamas and things in.

"Not much to tell" the blonde shrugged, "Besides I should get moving, the apartment needs cleaning and then there's laundry and shopping"

"You work too hard, Buffy" her friend said seriously, a hand on her arm to prevent her leaving until she'd finished speaking, "You should talk to Angel, he needs to be helping you with all this"

"Jenny" Buffy sighed, "I know you're trying to help but, it's okay. I can deal" she said a little unconvincingly as she went out of the door, "Thanks again for looking after Michael, I owe you one"

"Nonsense" Jenny said with a shake of her head, "It's what friends are for"

The two women shared a final smile before Buffy carried her son down one flight of stairs to her own apartment.

"Mommy?" Michael whined as she put him down on the ground and searched for her keys, "Is Daddy in there?" he pointed at the front door, making a face.

"Of course" Buffy told him, "Where else would Daddy be?"

"How come even if he's home I go see Aunt Jenny when you go out?" he asked next and Buffy felt sick. How did you tell a little boy that you don't trust his father enough to leave them alone together? Not that she really believed Angel would harm Michael, at least she thought she believed it. He could be so cruel though, he wouldn't have to even touch him in a physical sense. Angel could use just a harsh look and a few words to bring even her to tears sometimes, he could mentally screw up Michael all too easily, especially when he'd been drinking, and Buffy would not give him that oppurtunity.

"Daddy has stuff to do" she said, fumbling with her keys, hating knowing she was lying to her son, but she had very little choice. She could hardly tell the boy his father didn't love him enough to play nice, she sometimes wondered if he loved him at all, although that was a theory she'd rather not dwell on.

Buffy wrinkled her nose at the smell of stale beer as she opened the door and Michael ran inside ahead of her. Semi-crushed cans littered the coffee table along with half-empty chip bags and a pizza box missing most of it's contents.

"Hey, baby" Angel leered from the bedroom door and Buffy's stomach turned over at the sight of him. It was crazy to think just a few years ago he was what she lived for. They were so much in love during High School, she always wanted to be Mrs Liam O'Reilly, and finally the day came when it happened. It wasn't how Buffy had pictured it. Two days before her graduation she'd realised she was pregnant. At first Angel had been happy but resented the fact both his parents and Buffy's mother thought they should be married before the child was born.

Back then she'd had no idea that he spoke his vows to her under protest, only later in one of their screaming, raging arguments had he admitted it. After Michael was born, his father doted on him right up until they left the hospital. A whole two days of family-type bliss before it became apparent things were not going to be that simple. In short, Angel was jealous of Michael, his own son. It was possibly the most ridiculous thing in the world, but it was the only explanation. Any time Buffy spent caring for her baby, Angel spent trying to distract her and then sulking when his attempts were made in vain. Sometimes he was nice to her and Michael, sometimes it was like having the old Angel back, but those times were few and far between, especially now.

"Michael, honey, why don't you go to your room" Buffy told the boy, "Pick out a dvd and wait there for me, I'll come watch with you for a while, okay?"

"Yay!" was the excited response she got as her son darted towards his bedroom, only to be intercepted by Angel.

"Hey Mikey" he grinned, reaching for the boy who dodged away and ran into his room.

"His name is Michael" Buffy snapped. He knew how much she hated his name being shortened in that way, she was almost certain that was the main reason he used it.

"You didn't come home last night" was his only response he turned to look at her once again.

"I stayed at a friends" she replied, taking off her coat and hanging it on the hook behind the door, "I told you I might. Were you so drunk you don't even remember?"

By the time she turned around again, Angel was right there in her face. His breath was enough evidence to prove how much alcohol he'd consumed, even if she hadn't noticed the empty cans strewn about. He looked angry at first but his features softened eventually and he leaned in to whisper in her ear.

"I remembered" he told her, "I just missed you, baby" he told her, one hand running through her hair and the other down her body to her ass.

"Angel, don't" she said, pushing him away, "Just, don't"

She moved away from him, picking up some of the trash he'd left all over the place. It was times like this when she really questioned why she stayed with him, especially now as she thought of last night. Angel muttered something that sounded like 'bitch' before retreating back to the bedroom and slamming the door. Thankfully it seemed he was too drunk, tired, or a combination of both to bother starting an argument, but Buffy knew it'd come later. Most of the time her lack of want for him wasn't an issue and she knew only too well why. At least whilst he was screwing other women he left her alone in that department.

She sighed as she took the pizza box and cans through to the kitchen, dumping them in a black bag for the trash. Her life felt as if it were barely worth living on days like these. She worked a five day week whilst Angel claimed so many sick days, Buffy knew if his boss wasn't his cousin her lazy husband would have lost his job months, possibly years ago. He wasted what he earnt on himself, the beer he drank and cigarettes he sometimes smoked. Buffy was left to run the family home on the little she earned as a receptionist at a dental surgery. With all the things she needed to keep her son fed and clothed, she had no cash for luxuries and no time to spare as she spent most of the weekend cleaning and cooking and making time for her baby boy.

"Mommy!" aforementioned child called as he ran into the kitchen to find her, "Mommy, why are you crying?" he frowned when he found her sitting on the tiled floor in tears she'd barely noticed herself.

"It's okay, sweetie" she promised her son, "Mommy's fine, just being silly is all" she forced a smile as she wiped the dampness from her cheeks, "You picked out a dvd for us to watch?" she asked, getting up and washing her hands.

"Uh-huh" he said, proudly holding up his choice with a grin.

"Let's go then" his mother smiled, following him back to his room where she put the disc into the machine, flipped on the TV and settled on the bed with Michael on her lap. Her eyes didn't take in the cartoon, her brain certainly didn't register any of it at all as her mind raced around in circles til she felt sick.

It was almost four years since her own mother had passed away. For months before that Joyce Summers had suffered with cancer, having told her daughter of her illness on the very day Buffy was going to explain about Angel's change of character. The young girl as she was then, planned to ask if she could move back in with her mother, only to be told of Joyce's dreadful illness. Buffy couldn't impose, she had to support her mother, not add stress to her condition. When the illness finally took her, Buffy was left without a family to turn to, and no friends that could really help her. Nobody knew the extent to which Angel had altered. He was sweetness and light in company, or at least he had been til he stopped going anywhere with his wife.

At this point there was no escape. Buffy had little money, no family, and hardly any friends since most had been driven away by her husbands appalling behaviour. If there was just her to think of she might have made a run for it, anywhere she could afford, just to get away. Michael made the difference. She could bear to be unloved and badly treated by Angel, if it meant keeping her child safe and well.

Last night was supposed to be a release, one night of goodness to help her face the badness of everyday life. All it had done was prove to Buffy just how much she was missing, and showed her how awful her life had really become. Still, despite all this, she would not give up the memory of that special night for anything in the world.

To Be Continued...