by: Niamh
disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Never have, never will.
notes: Angsty start but I'll be working towards a (mostly) happy ending. This chapter is the prologue and is not the style in which the following chapters will be written. This merely sets the stage and gets Draco's feelings out in the air. Also posted at aff . net under the name Niamh.
- Prologue: Broken -
You BROKE my heart.
I believed in you and you BETRAYED me!
You LIED to me.
You made so many PROMISES. So many wonderful promises.
You didn't keep any of them.
You made me RELY on you. You made it so I couldn't survive without you.
Then you left me to die. You ABANDONED me.
I clutch my head and SCREAM! SCREAM for what you took from me.
You took my SOUL.
You took my FUCKING soul!
I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU! Why did you go…?
I can't get it out…no one can understand and all I can do is SCREAM.
You DESTROYED me. You DESTROYED my WHOLE FUCKING WORLD! You were my world.
I SCREAM. I HOWL. I WAIL. I FALL to my knees. I CLUTCH the ground. I CLAW at my body and I TEAR at my hair. I CRY. I SOB. And no matter what I do I can't express how BROKEN I am without you.
I gave up everything for you!
YOU FUCKING BASTARD, I GAVE EVERYTHING! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?
You didn't just break me…you INCINERATED me. There are no pieces to pick up. I can't move on. There's nothing left, so tell me, fucker, what do I do now?
You've ripped out the essence of who I am. YOU'VE TAKEN EVERYTHING FROM ME!
I abandoned my FUCKING LIFE for YOU! JUST FOR YOU! ALL FOR YOU!
Dammit, what do I fucking do now? I don't have anything left, don't have fucking anything…I left EVERYTHING for you and now I don't even have a place to call home…
I KICK and SCREAM and it does nothing. It still HURTS.
My throat is RAW, I BEAT on the ground with my fists. I FEEL the rain, I BURY my hands in the quickly forming mud.
I RAGE, RAGE, RAGE against the storm. I SHRIEK at the sky. For all my noise I can't convey just how I feel.
YOU LEFT ME! HOW DARE YOU?
You promised me FOREVER. You promised me love. You gave me NOTHING. You took my all and WALKED AWAY.
And now here I am. Alone, screaming my throat raw at the sobbing skies. No one will ever want me now. I'm USED up. I don't want anyone but you.
My fists are bloody from pounding the ground but I don't STOP, I can't stop.
Pain, hurt, make it stop, come back, come back, PAIN, it hurts, dammit, come back to me, don't leave me like this, I love you, I love you so much, why are you doing this, stop it hurting, stop it, STOP!
No, no, this isn't real, can't be real, let me wake up, wake up, please, why can't I wake up?
But it is. It's REAL.
I gave up everything for a LIE.
I'm so fucking STUPID! I should've SEEN!
How dare you LIE to me? Me, who LOVED you!
DAMN YOU DAMN YOU, I scream.
So many sweet words WHISPERED.
But they meant NOTHING to you, you bastard. I'm ALONE ALONE ALONE.
I HATE YOU! COME BACK TO ME RIGHT NOW! I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU! You made damn sure of that.
You PLANNED this.
This is some kind of sick REVENGE.
Do you see me? Do you see my face? Covered in TEARS and MUD and RAIN? Do you feel ANYTHING?
I LOVE YOU!
sob sob choke cry WAIL. I rock back and forth. I clutch my head and sob.
love you so much, don't leave me like this, don't leave me like this…
"Malfoy."
I look up.
- End Prologue -