A/N : Yep, this story is back, and there will be some serious Spuffyness very soon... not so much in this chapter but stick with it cos we'll get there I promise. Also, if anyone wants to talk to me, or each other, about this story or any of my others, I am making use of the new forum option at this site - the link is on my profile page. Hope you like the new chapter :-)
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)

Chapter 9

"Mommy!" Michael squealed, running into her arms as soon as she got through the front door.

"Hey sweetie" she smiled, "You have a good day?" she checked as they came back into the living room where Giles sat in his chair with a children's storybook he'd obviously been reading to her son.

"We did math at school" Michael grinned, "I can count higher than all the other kids in my class" he told her proudly, "And at lunch Mandy Stevenson tried to kiss me" he added, his smile turning into an unimpressed look that almost made Buffy laugh.

"Did you have productive trip to the college, Buffy?" Giles asked her as she sat down opposite him.

"Grandpa Giles says you're gonna go to school Mommy" Michael chipped in, "I thought Mommy's already knew everything" he said with puzzled expression on his little face.

"Nobody knows everything, sweetie" Buffy told him, ruffling his hair, "but no, Mommy probably won't be going back to school after all" she admitted, much to her father's surprise. Still, he kept quiet in front of Michael, since it seemed Buffy didn't want to speak further on the subject with him around.

It was a few hours later when the little boy had been put to bed that Giles came into the living room with two mugs of cocoa to ask his daughter what was troubling her. She'd been too quiet and distant since she got back from the college, and he wanted to know both the reason for this and for her sudden decision not to take the English classes she'd been so set on before.

"I guess you wanna know what's up, right?" Buffy asked, before Giles had a chance to speak.

"If you wish to tell me, I'll gladly listen" he told her as he sat down in the chair opposite where she was on the couch with her legs pulled up underneath herself, "I know we haven't known each other long, Buffy, but I can tell that something is worrying you"

"I went to the college" she began to explain, staring into the mug between her hands, "I met the Professor, and I knew him..." she said, glancing up at her father, "It's Spike"

"Spike?" Giles echoed, not understanding.

"The guy that I..." Buffy said awkwardly, "That night when I was... unfaithful. He's the father of my baby, Giles" she said, one hand going sub-consciously to her stomach, "He's the one man in the world that I never thought I'd see again, the one that I..." her sentence trailed away as she was forced to swallow hard in order to keep her tears at bay. Everything was so mixed up, so complicated, and just when it had felt it was getting a little better too.

"Goodness me" Giles gasped, "What an incredible coincidence"

"Tell me about it" Buffy replied quietly, her voice wavering with emotion, "All the times I thought about it, dreamed about it, and what was the first thing I did when I saw him?" she laughed humourlessly as the herself, "I passed out" she admitted.

"Well, in the circumstances I'm sure he understood" Giles told her kindly, "I mean the shock alone, and then your condition of course"

"I didn't tell him about that" Buffy told him guiltily shaking her head, "I know I probably should've but... Giles, I barely know him, he barely knows me. I have a son and another child on the way, and technically I'm still married"

"Yes, I suppose there are rather a lot of complications that he's not aware of" Giles considered as he removed his glasses and polished them, "Do you think you want to tell him these things, to let him be a part of your life?" he asked Buffy.

"Yes" came her immediate answer, "No, yes, I don't know" she changed her mind too many times before putting her face in her hands and making a frustrated sound.

"This is insane!" she exclaimed as she ran her hands over her face and back through her hair, "Six months ago I was home in my apartment with my husband and my son living an ordinary life" she shook her head, "Now, I'm here in a foreign country, with a Dad I never knew I had, pregnant by a guy I've met a total of two times, and... and I have no idea how to deal" she sighed, tears of frustration, and anger, and desperation coming to her eyes.

"Don't upset yourself, my dear" Giles urged her, as he reached out a hand to her arm, "For my part, I'm terribly sorry for any upset or confusion I have caused" he apologised.

"It's not you" Buffy assured him, managing a half smile as she put her hand over his, "I love that I found you, and everything you've done for me and for Michael, I can't even tell you what it means to me"

"It's what any father would've done" he said modestly, but Buffy disagreed.

"Not my father" she told him, "Well, y'know, Hank. Not all guys would've done what you have, taken us in like this, accepted us"

"I've missed so much, Buffy" Giles sighed, "You grew up without me, and dear Joyce passed away never truly knowing how much I loved her. The very least I can do is be here for you now, help in anyway I can, and you know I'm getting just as much out of it as you" he smiled, "I have a beautiful daughter and a wonderful grandson who I fully intend to spoil as much as I am able" he told her solemnly, making Buffy smile wider.

"I'm so sorry you didn't get a chance to be my Dad before" she said sadly, "I think you'd have been great when I was growing up"

"Perhaps" Giles agreed modestly, "but the more important question now I suppose would be what kind of father might Spike make?" he reminded her.

"How can I possibly know that?" Buffy laughed humourlessly, "The first time we met we barely had a conversation and today... I didn't know where to start I was so shocked to see him" she said as she picked up her cocoa from the table once again and ran her finger round the top of the mug.

"How do you tell a guy you hardly even know, that you want him to come play Daddy cos you're having his baby?" she asked Giles, wishing it were just that simple.

"If I could wave a magic wand, and solve all your problems, Buffy" he told her, "You know that is exactly what I would do, but as it is..."

"You can't" she interrupted with a sad smile, "and I know that, obviously. This isn't a fairytale and I'm not a princess. Spike is not Prince Charming, and there is no fairy godmother or whatever to make this all better"

"That is all true" Giles agreed, "but Buffy, things could all turn out well, we must look on the bright-side, things could be much worse"

"Worse things happen at sea" she smiled, "that's what Mom used to say"

"A very good reason to never buy a boat I'm sure" Giles said with a wry smile as he sipped his cocoa, glad to see Buffy laugh silently at his mini-joke.

"I think I need to go to bed" she said a moment later, taking her cocoa with her as she got to her feet, "Maybe sleep will help me figure out where I go from here" she said with more confidence than she really felt about her little plan.

"Sweet dreams, my dear" her father said as she left the room and headed to her bedroom.

Buffy passed by Michael's room and stopped by the door to look in on him. Her son slept peacefully, no doubt dreaming of pirate adventures or slaying dragons, or any number of other childhood fantasies that boys of six and seven years old were prone to have. It was all so innocent back then, at that tender age. Boys wanted to be heroes, and knights, and kings, little girls wanted to be princesses and angels. All you wanted as you grew up was to be happy, to be your parents maybe in their good moments. For all her dreams, Buffy had never once considered her life might turn out as it had.

She sighed as she silently closed the door of Michael's bedroom and walked along the hall to her own. She finished up her cocoa, changed into her nightwear and got into bed, mind still whirring with a million thoughts she doubted she'd ever be able to deal with.

Buffy didn't think she'd ever get to sleep with so much going on inside her head, but at length she managed to close her eyes and drift away, the last thought she had being; 'I wonder what Spike is thinking about tonight?'

'Somebody please, kill me now' Spike thought as he stared into his drink and listened to the girl next to him prattle on about something mind-numbingly boring, about some mates of hers whom he didn't know nor ever cared to. He'd only got talking to the silly bint because from the back and in the bad lighting of the pub she'd looked vaguely like Buffy Summers. As he reached her side he knew he was wrong, but it was too late, she'd spotted him and decided she wanted a chat and a drink.

Having nothing else to do, Spike took a seat and bought Harmony a cocktail. Her yammering about visiting the country from America made his mind wander far away from her words to his own trip away, and the beautiful blonde he had met in Sunnydale, California. Now she was here, living somewhere within a few miles radius of the college he guessed though he had no idea where. Buffy Summers, her name was as beautiful as she was, he decided as he downed another drink, hoping to make himself numb to Harmony's chatter. He was just too nice to tell a lady to shut her gob, not that she seemed to be much of a lady, if her skimpy outfit and the amount she was drinking was anything to go by.

When time was called and everyone was asked to leave the pub so it could close, Spike and Harmony got off their bar stools at the same time, her falling a little drunkenly into his arms.

"Well, Spikey" she giggled, "What do you wanna do now?" she asked him.

"Don't know about you, pet" he sighed as he hauled her up so she was standing straight, "but I just fancy going home to my bed"

"That sounds like fun" Harmony smiled drunkenly as she leaned in very close to him, "Wanna take me with you?" she whispered, her face close to his. Far from being attracted to her, Spike turned his head away to escape the strong smell of all the alcohol she'd consumed.

"Sorry, luv" he shook his head as he sat her back down on her stool and called one of the bar staff over, "Could someone call her a cab?" he asked, tilting his head towards the dizzy blonde. The barmaid said she would and Spike turned to Harmony.

"Look, pet" he sighed, "'S not that you're not a lovely girl, and I'm very flattered and all that but... well, thanks, but no thanks, okay?" he told her before turning to walk away. Harmony barely heard him as she concentrated solely on sitting upright on the stool and not falling off.

When Spike got outside the fresh air hit him like a smack in the face, but not as much as reality had done already. A girl in there, blonde and American and a little drunk, had just offered him a night of fun, something he'd turned down without a thought. She wasn't like Buffy, at least she had some class, hadn't just thrown herself drunkenly into his arms, giggling like a mad thing. She was better, different, more than just a one night stand, he'd known that even then. When he'd woken up in the morning and found the other side of the bed empty he'd hated to think he'd never see her again. It wasn't as if she was the first women he'd slept with or anything, he'd had his share of women but nobody had made him feel quite like Buffy had. Of course he'd told himself it was just the thrill of it all, her being some kind of holiday fling or whatever, but it wasn't as simple as that.

Now here she was, back in his life, her kiss exciting him as much now as it had before. Spike wanted her, wanted to be with her again, wanted to get to know her, find out if what was between them was something real, because it certainly felt like it could be. He sighed as he walked towards home, lighting a cigarette on the way and blowing out smoke into the night. Tomorrow he was going to find Buffy Summers, no matter what it took. At the very least he had to know how and why she was suddenly here, and if he ever stood a chance of calling her his own.

To Be Continued...