Disclaimer: I don't own any part of FFVIII. I will make no profit from the posting of this piece of fiction.

Notes: Thanks to the people who reviewed. An anonymous reader suggested that I try making my sentences shorter to add emphasis so I'm trying it and like the way it turned out.
This is a POV fic so the sentences are kind of fragmented and broken. I think this represents more of an individual thought process. Especially when a person is under a lot of stress.

Reviews. I love reviews. Let me know what you guys think about the shorter sentence and thought structure. Should I stick more to my prose like style of the first chapter or the style you are about to read? Let me know.

Warning: There is some violence near the end.

Now onto the new chapter.

The whispers won't stop. They haunt me with every step. I find myself running but I can't escape them, in fact they only grow louder. They make me hate myself.

Soft shivers plague me. I'm worthless, I always have been. The voices rise in a cacophony of screams. I feel like I'm drowning. Selphie's voice is the only one I can clearly distinguish. She's calling me.

I'm awake. The screams fade to whispers until only Selphie's voice is left. Her wide green eyes, she's scared. Scared for me. I pull my knees to my chest and hide my face.

They say the eyes are the window to the soul. Do I even have a soul?

"Irvine?" Her soft voice pulls me back and I look up at her. Pain, fear, emptiness, rejection... they are all reflected in her eyes. She must hate me too she just hasn't realized it yet.

She places her tiny hand on my shoulder and I realize as she does so that I'm shaking. Concern is etched in every detail of her face, because of me.

"Why do you stay when all others turn away?" A cryptic question yet I need the answer.

"What do you mean?"

"The whispers Selphie? You shouldn't be around me. They whisper about you as much as they do me." Hyne I can't do this. Her eyes ruin my walls.

"I'll destroy you Selphie." I can deal with being alone. She can't.

"Irvine you're scaring me." A peal of quiet laughter escapes my throat.

"It's the truth." Do I tell her or not?

"You're the only friend I've ever had Selphie." She's staring at me with tears in her eyes. "They hate me you know that right?"

"That's not true."

"Listen when they think you can't hear." I can't look at her anymore. "They will destroy you just like they are destroying me." My voice quiet, no more than a whisper.

"I can make them understand."

"NO." The harshness of my reply startles her. "no." Much softer. "Don't make them hate you."

"They won't hate me, not if I get Squall and the others to back me up." She has such faith, faith I lost a long time ago.

"No you can't." She strains to hear me. "You can't save me Selphie." I move to the edge of the bed and stand. She's lost and there is nothing I can do.

"Why won't you let me help? I care. I mean it." She stands and looks so small. Before I think I lean down and capture he lips. She kisses back and wraps her arms around my neck.

I want to stay like this forever but I can't.

"I love you Selphie. I can't drag you with me." I wipe her tears away. "It's not because I don't love you." I pull her close and bury my face in her hair. "I don't want you to get hurt." The words are barely whispered but I know she hears them.

"I won't." She's trying to be brave but she doesn't understand how bad it will get. She doesn't know how I really got my bruises.

"It will only get worse. I won't risk you Selphie."

"You deserve to be happy too." Hyne does she ever think of herself?

"I'll be happy knowing you are safe." My shoulder is soaked with her tears and I hold her closer.

"You should leave." For a second I think she's going to be stubborn.

Once she's gone I sink to the floor and pull my knees to my chest. They stripped me of my walls, something I thought no one could do.

Self doubt, the ultimate killer.

With a sigh I lift myself off the floor and gather my rifle before heading to the training center. Temporary solace in endless death.

I'm there for hours until I've exhausted the ammo supply I brought with me. My muscles burn as I finally climb out of the tree. My head still aching from the fall and from staring down a rifle sight.

I make it to the exit of the training center. A rare feat considering the number of grats that the garden keeps around. I just want a hot shower and sleep. The exit to the center is so close but suddenly my path is blocked.

Welsom. He's a lot bigger than I am. One of the Garden's best hand to hand fighters besides Zell. Fear churns in my stomach and I try to move around him without a confrontation. No such chance.

He grabs my wrist and before I can react he pulls it behind my back. I can't move or I risk breaking the bones. He moves closer to me and tightens his grip on my arm. A soft hiss of pain escapes my lips but I don't dare move.

"You damn little Galbadian snake." I can feel his warm breath on my ear. "I should break your hand." He means it. Suddenly he lets me go and I stumble away from him. My wrist aching and head buzzing.

Suddenly there are two more guys beside Welsom. Cravvars and Pelton. I remember them from my magical theory class last semester. This isn't good.

"We can't let him leave yet." Cravvars. A pit is forming my stomach and I consider calling Diablos. Despite my dislike of Gfs the two of us connected. He's a loner, one who likes his solitude.

"Yeah." Pelton cracks his knuckles.

I won't beg.

Cravvers and Pelton tackle me. One holding my legs and the other my arms. Welsom just watches me struggle.

Diablo's name rises to my lips but before I can call him a sharp pain stabs through my side and I cry out .

The steel toe of Welsom's boot meets my side again and I arch against my captors as pain erupts through my body. White spots dance across my vision and I silently beg Hyne to let me pass out. No such luck as Welsom kicks me again.

I couldn't call Diablos now if i wanted to, not with my body being wracked by white hot fire. A fourth kick and I'm finally rewarded with the blackness I had been praying for.

I awaken to the sterile smell of the infirmary. Dr. Kadowaki is hovering over me and when she sees that I'm awake she brings a flask of healing potion to my lips. I accept the bitter fluid and almost choke even as it goes to work.

"Care to tell me what happened Mr. Kinneas? Three students brought you in. They said they found you in the training center.

I nod. I'm not going to tell her the truth.

"I've seen every wound the monsters in the training center cause. Those bruises were not inflicted by Grats." I silently curse.

"I let my guard down." I try to sit up but the pain in my abdomen and the Doctor's restraining hand stop me.

"You are staying overnight." On some levels I'm grateful, on others I feel like I'm being treated like a kid. She's firm though and a night here means a night I don't have to worry and I allow the pain killers to lure me to sleep.

Dr. Kadowaki is still in the infirmary when I come around.

"How do you feel?" I run my fingers over my stomach and wince at the pain.

"Better." She glares at me and I stare back.

"I'll let you go but only if you promise to check in if the pain gets worse or you start suffering from anything unusual." I had hoped she would make me stay longer.

She fills a pain prescription for me and I head for my dorm. As I leave she calls to me.

"When you are ready I'll listen." I turn back to her and tip my hat to her. It's my guesture of thanks.

I still have a headache and I want some more sleep.

As I near my dorm I start to feel a little uneasy, like something isn't right. When I reach the door the lock twists in my hand and I can see the damage from where it has been busted.

Dread pools in my chest. I had been given my own room even though I wasn't a SeeD because of the role I played in Ultimacia's defeat. It's obvious someone has been in there.

I steady myself and push the door open to find chaos. The place is absolutely trashed. Everything I had is destroyed. I enter and the door closes behind me.

My clothes and bedding shredded, my extra ammo scattered around the floor.

I know I'm in shock. The pictures that had covered my walls have been ripped down and the walls themselves are covered with anti-Galbadian slurs.

The few possessions I had from Galbadia are destroyed. The worst though is the pictures of my friends. Squall, Selphie, Quisty, Rinoa, Zell all of them torn into pieces I can't rebuild.

It takes me a few minutes to realize that I'm crying. I can't take it anymore and I sink to my knees amongst the chaos. My ribs protest painfully but I ignore them.

My life hangs in tatters and there is nothing I can do to rebuild it. I push myself to my feet in a haze. I don't know what I'm doing as I stumble to my closet and open it. The only thing not ruined is my duffel bag.

A message. My brain running on autopilot as my emotions completely shut down. They want me gone so I'll leave.

I start gathering what I can. The only thing salvageable is my ammunition and some clothes that had been thrown around rather than shredded. It's hardly enough.

I make it to the gate without being seen. Hyne thank you. I'll be saying goodbye forever. Selphie. A pain worse than everything I've been through in the last month rips through me.

/Hyne I'm sorry for leaving without saying goodbye./

"Please understand." I whisper aloud.

Okay, review time. Did you guys like the structure of this new chapter? What about the content? I wasn't too tough on Irvine was I? Review please.

Catch you guys when I get the next one written.