"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro." -Hunter S. Thompson
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Captain Fun presents...
ODD of the DEAD
A "Code Lyoko" Fan-Fiction
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CHAPTER 1
Bad Craziness
Or
Fear & Loathing in Northern France
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"I don't know Wayne, I really think you should reconsider." Isaiah was less than comfortable with his friend Wayne's plan to get them out of having to go to class. Ever since he first presented him with the plan, he wasn't so sure about it's integrity. It sounded absurd and, furthermore, Wayne wasn't exactly the brightest person in the school, even though he was an upperclassman. Isaiah had told Wayne all week about how foolish and stupid he was for even contemplating that it would work and they wouldn't get caught. However, Isaiah somehow felt less than eager to berate Wayne over his naïve plan. Perhaps the fact that Wayne was holding an axe in his hand had something to do with it.
"Oh please," Wayne replied, clearly frustrated with Isaiah's timid nature, "It's near-flawless! Look, I take this axe and break open the water pipe down here in the basement. This will cause the basement to flood. Right after we do it, we rush over to the dorms, change into some dry clothes and play dumb."
"Sounds like that last part shouldn't be too hard for you to pull off." Isaiah shot back at Wayne.
"Shut your hole Isaiah!" Wayne countered, "You're just mad that you didn't think of it."
"Please. And besides, what exactly did you need to bring me down here for in the first place? You can pull this whole stunt off yourself, right?"
"So you can be my alibi." Wayne replied.
"Excuse me?"
"My alibi!" the confidence in Wayne's voice was disconcerting, "When asked later where we were, you can tell them that you and I were hanging out and I can tell them the same thing!"
The hole in Wayne's logic was so big that Isaiah was surprised that Wayne didn't just fall right into it. Did he really have to point out the painfully obvious to him?
"At the risk of sounding like Captain Obvious," Isaiah replied rather matter-of-factly, "Exactly why did you need to bring me along for that?"
A silence came over Wayne. Remember that gapping hole in his logic? Well, he had just fallen into it. He lied there at the bottom, attempting to futilely claw his way out like E.T. in a crappy Atari 2600 game. He eventually gave up and muttered an infuriated "Shut up!" and continued down the poorly lit basement corridor, axe in hand.
"Dumbass." Isaiah muttered under his breath. He followed Wayne, walking right behind him as they both disappeared into the dark sections of the basements.
Right underneath Isaiah as he walked away was a small drainage pipe; it's slots only thin enough for a few coins to fit through it. A pitch-black smoke began to ooze up through its orifices. A cloud of fog so dark and thick at first glace you would almost swear that you could hack through it with a machete. It only continued to draw itself up from the drain until it blanketed the floor. It was XANA. The thick, ominous layer of smoke began to creep down the halls into the direction that both Wayne and Isaiah were walking down.
"Ah, found it!" Wayne sounded proud of himself for discovering the water pipe that he was about to vandalize. "After this, it'll be days before we'll have to go back to class. Five-day weekend, here we come!" Wayne clenched the axe tightly, preparing to make his move.
"Remember," Wayne said looking over his shoulder at Isaiah, "The moment I break this pipe, make a run for it!"
Isaiah shrugged, his assurance to Wayne that he was going to comply. He was less than eager to go through with the plan, a plan that would most likely land him in Juvey, or at least expelled. Yeah, he wouldn't have to worry about going to class then.
"Wayne," Isaiah, said, trying one last time to bring reason to his foolish friend, "Are you completely sure this is going to work?"
"Of course!" Wayne answered smiling, "I was it once on 'Donnie Darko'!"
That only further brought down the price of stock on Wayne's intellectual integrity. It wasn't enough that he couldn't fathom a good idea for bringing Isaiah into this, but now he was imitating violent and vandalistic acts he saw in movies. Joseph Lieberman would absolutely love to get his hands on this kid.
"Get serious Wayne!" Isaiah was tired of being polite with his axe-wielding pal, "Movies like that are not meant to be taken seriously! They're just absurd fantasy stories like 'Star Wars' or '28 Days Later'."
"Too bad." Wayne answered. His friend's lack of faith in him didn't compromise his plan an inch as he went through with it. The blade came down on the metal pipe causing a small geyser, splashing fluid all over the walls, ceiling and other pipes surrounding it.
"All right," Wayne hollered, trying to speak over the running water. "Now let's get the Hell out of WHAT THE CRAP?!" Both Wayne and Isaiah pivoted in the opposite direction only to run into a wall of the dark smoke that stalked them through the basement.
"What the Hell is that thing?!" Isaiah screamed.
Both of them soon became well acquainted with what was blocking their path as it rushed through their bodies and evaporated into thin air. A choking sensation came over both of them, followed by what felt like a surge of ice water rushing through their bodies. Both Wayne and Isaiah hit the floor on their knees, their hands on their throats gasping for air as the water from the broken pipe showered them. After a few seconds of futile gasping, their once dark skin knocked itself down a few tones to a lifeless gray. Their eyes began to bleach and their gasps turned into hisses and moans. Whatever XANA had hit both Wayne and Isaiah with, they now succumbed to. Both kids got to their feet. Now breathing out their mouths wildly like madmen, they dragged themselves across through the dampened halls and towards the stairs from whence they entered.
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"Well, I can't talk for more longer Aeilta, lunch is almost ready." Jeremy, as always, was spending his free time in front of his computer, just talking away to Aelita. She was a drug for him. He never got even the slightest bit tired of her, in a matter of fact, he always seemed to be wanting more. That's what most of this was all about. Ever since he and his friends, Yumi, Ulrich and Odd, had discovered Aelita a while back, they had devoted their energy time-and-time again to help save her, sometimes even putting their own life on the line.
But for Jeremy, it was something more. Aelita was, to him,was trapped in the virtual world in which she resides. He wanted to bring her here to be with him, but he had yet to succeed. His past failures plagued and irritated him, but Aelita, his pie-in-the-sky, always cheered him back up to the point where he would try again. His cheerleader and number one fan.
"Lunch?" replied Aelita.
"Yes, lunch." Jeremy responded smiling. Aelita's naïve nature slightly humored Jeremy. "You remember 'Lunch', right?"
Aelita stared back at Jeremy sheepishly. She had clearly forgotten. Jeremy let out a slight laugh,
"Oh, you remember 'lunch'. It's the time in the middle of the day when we eat."
"Oh yes!" Aelita responded happily. "I do remember! It's the second of three sessions in the day when humans eat!"
"Yeah! Now you've got it!"
"Wow," Aelita added, changing her tone slightly, "Humans sure do eat a lot. I don't know if I'll be able to remember it all."
Jeremy laughed once more. "Oh don't worry Aeilta. It'll come to you like clockwork." A knock came on Jeremy's door. Yumi's voice came through the other side.
"Hey Jeremy, it's lunchtime! Finish up in there!"
"Yeah!" Odd added, "And besides, it's spicy chicken sandwich day!"
"I'll be right behind you guys!" Jeremy yelled back, "I'm just wrapping things up!"
"Well, we're not waiting up," Odd replied, "I'm starving! Let's split." Jeremy turned back to Aelita as he heard the sounds of his friends walking off.
"I've got to go now Aelita. Time to eat."
"Jeremy…" Aelita tried to catch his attention before he took off.
"Yes Aelita?"
"I…I hope that we can have the chance to eat together sometime." Jeremy stopped for a second to ponder that thought. To him, it was a lovely thought. Sitting together at a table talking to Aelita while they both enjoyed a meal, not ever having to worry about going back into the virtual world to risk dying to fight XANA. That was simply too wonderful.
"Yeah. I'd love to do that too."
Aelita gave Jeremy one of her comforting smiles and faded back into the virtual world, ending their conversation. Jeremy removed his headset and gathered his things together. He headed out the door to join his friends in the cafeteria.
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"Now, can anyone in here tell us how photosynthesis works?" Mrs. Hertz already knew that her class most likely didn't. It was another lazy Spring afternoon and thoughts of the weekend were running through her student's minds. The concept of photosynthesis and other biological habits of a plant's homeostasis were low on their thought priorities, regardless of whether it was going to be on the test or not.
"C'mon now," Mrs. Hertz said, breaking the silence, "We just talked about this yesterday!"
The class remained silent. Surely someone in this classroom of daydreaming children understood the process of creating carbohydrates from carbon dioxide and water using sunlight as it's energy source and releasing oxygen back into the environment as waste, but whoever they were was simply to apathetic to speak up.
"This is ridiculous." Mrs. Hertz added angrily, "Is there anyone in here capable of retaining information for a period longer than 24 hours?"
Though slightly hurt, because they knew that none of them could, the classroom remained quiet. Not one single child made the attempt to answer Mrs. Hertz question at the threat of getting it wrong and looking like a fool for trying.
Before Mrs. Hertz could scold her class for their poor studying habits, her classroom door slowly opened up. The kids stood at attention. After all, it could be the Principal and no one wants to look like a bad student in front of the principal, regardless of their ability to remember what photosynthesis is. Isaiah crept through the door slowly, dragging his feet behind him. Mrs. Hertz was quick to take notice.
"Who do you think you are barging in here?" she shot at her intruder, "I'm bust teaching a class in here! And you're an upperclassman! Why aren't you in your class? Show me your hall pass!"
A light hiss passed through Isaiah's rotting teeth; other than that, no response. Mrs. Hertz took a moment to examine Isaiah. His pale, cracking skin; his bleached eyes; his disconnected demeanor; something was obviously wrong with him, and she was quick to take notice.
Mrs. Hertz edged over to Isaiah and put her hand on his shoulder. "Are you feeling okay child?" she asked him.
Isaiah's whitened eyes turned from facing Mrs. Hertz and stared maliciously at Mrs. Hertz hand.
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Herb & Nicholas were walking down the second floor halls. They had just recently been defeated once again in a game of soccer and had to change out of their sweaty clothes before they could muster-up the courage to show their faces in the cafeteria. Herb, as always, took his beating rather bad. One would figure that if someone last as many times as he has at a single game, you would have come to terms with it and maybe even have a sense of humor about it. Herb, however, wasn't one of those people.
His quest to impress Sissy turned out to be an exponentially more difficult task than he originally projected. Ulrich, who Sissy had her sights on for a long time, was the school's MVP for soccer and Herb's game had rendered him Ulrich's polar opposite. Herb figured if he took up soccer, he too could impress Sissy and deviate her attraction for Ulrich over to him. Herb didn't, however, count on the possibility that he could very well suck at the game, and suck he did. He showed-up for practice all right, but even that didn't create even the slightest improvement in his game. He was indeed the anti-prodigy of the sport, and, just like everyday, he was rather sore about it.
Nicholas, however, seemed to be in a far different mood. Though he had just been, yet again, beaten badly at the game, he seemed perfectly fine about it, almost cheery even. Nicholas had clearly come to terms with his pathetic game, but he didn't let that spoil his mood. He was having one of "those days". One of those days when you're so blissfully happy that not even the most depressing of things can seem compromise you. It was bad enough that he had to be so explicit around Herb with his optimism, but furthermore, he had to be singing too.
"Milk and Cereal, Milk and Cereal, Milk and Cereal, Cereal and Milk!" he sung.
"Could you knock it off?" Herb interrupted, "It's not even a funny song."
"I know," Nicholas replied still smiling, "But it's so catchy!" he resumed with his singing. "'A' is for 'Apple', 'J' is for Jacks…"
"I'm serious Nicholas, cut that crap out right now!"
"Sheesh, someone is feeling pretty sore today."
"You're going to feel pretty sore too when I ram my foot right up your…"
Suddenly, a load, animalistic moan went through the hallways. Both Herb & Nicholas turned to see Wayne standing in front of them, slouching with his mouth hanging open.
"Uh, can we help you?" Herb said addressing the upperclassman standing in before him. Wayne said nothing and began walking towards Herb.
"Whoa! We can hear you just fine from here buddy!" Herb added. He was quickly becoming uncomfortable with the situation. Wayne moved in and slowly extended his arm forward, reaching out for Herb.
"Well, well," Nicholas commented, "Looks like someone wants a hug."
"Back off pal!" Herb yelled franticly, "I'm not like that! This ain't Oz yo!"
Wayne grabbed onto Herb and began howling at him through rotting teeth and violent eyes. Even Nicholas was getting the impression that something was wrong.
"Hey easy man," Nicholas said putting his hand on Wayne's shoulder, "We don't want any trouble."
Wayne's right hand swung at Nicholas' chest, sending him back so far that he almost fell over the ledge and onto the first floor. Wayne fixed his sights back on Herb, who was now struggling.
"Get…OFF!" Herb shouted at the creature. He put his hands against his abdomen and gave him a good shove. Wayne stumbled backwards and lost his balance on the stairs. He tumbled down them like a rag doll, giving off sounds of snapping bones and breaking skin. He eventually hit the first floor and went limp. Herb and Nicholas gathered together at the top of the stairs and stared at his lifeless body with fear in their eyes. Herb's knees were knocking together. He was still shaken from the encounter and the idea of going to Juvey for manslaughter wasn't exactly helping him ease his nerves.
"Oh…Crap." Nicholas uttered softly, breaking the silence. A female upperclassman ran down the hall on the first floor and stood over Wayne's body. She stared at it for a second and fixed her sights back up at Herb and Nicholas.
"What in God's name happened?" she said franticly. She was trying not to panic.
"He, he tried to attack me!" Herb stuttered, "I don't know what his problem was or who he is, but he just came at me and hit Nicholas." Herb turned to Nicholas. "You saw it, right?"
"Yeah," Nicholas' upbeat attitude had clearly subsided, "He just attacked us out of the blue!"
"I didn't mean to do it!" Herb added, almost in tears, "I just wanted him off of me!"
"That's not what's important now." The girl answered. She knelt down before Wayne's battered body and put her hand up to his neck. No pulse.
"Dead." She muttered softly to herself. She looked back up at the terrified mid-level students. "Look, this guy needs medical attention. I want you two to go and get…"
She was cut off. Wayne's fist suddenly became reanimated as he punched her through the face and into her skull, shattering it like a ceramic plate. Wayne removed his blood-soaked fist from what little remained of her face, allowing her cranial contents to spill out onto the floor for both Herb & Nicholas to see. Wayne sat up and, grabbing the girl by her shoulder and head, sunk his teeth into her neck, ripping out a good chunk of muscle mass. Tearing it from its tendons, blood gushed out from her veins, splashing Wayne in the face as he feasted upon her corpse. Both Herb and Nicholas stood there at the top of the stairs, staring at the horrific sight of the strange kid coming mysteriously back to life and now devouring this poor girl. Nicholas again, broke the silence.
"Oh…CRAP!"
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Sissy strutted down the hall headed for the cafeteria. She had just finished with her cheerleading practices and had worked-up a good appetite. Ulrich was going to play this weekend and, as usual, was expected to play a phenomenal game. Sissy wanted to look good for him and cheer him on. Who knows, this could very well be the weekend that she steals him right under Yumi's nose and makes him her's. Natural Selection at work at it's finest.
Down the hall from her was Herb and Nicholas. They were running for dear life and headed right for. Both slowed-down once they got in talking distance of her. They were sweating franticly, gasping for air and looked as if they had just seen a ghost.
"Whoa!" Sissy said addressing her faithful cohorts, "Where's the fire? You almost knocked me down! You should be more careful next time."
"Sissy," Herb said, still panting for air, "Thank God we found you!"
"Yeah," Nicholas added, "Something really bad has happened!"
"What?!" Sissy responded angrily. She clearly didn't like the sound of that. "What did you two in morons do this time?"
"It wasn't our fault Sissy!" Nicholas pleaded.
"Yeah," Herb added, still short of breath, "He just attacked us and I got scared and Nicholas tried to push him off but he hit him and then I got scared and pushed him and he fell down th…"
"WHOA!" Sissy hollered, cutting Herb off, "Take a Ritalin and chill! I can't understand a word of what you're saying!"
"Sissy!" Herb yelled, "I think he's trying to kill us!" This got Sissy's attention. It was the first intelligible thing she got out of him since both he and Nicholas stopped her on the way to the cafeteria and it was definitely one of the last things she wanted to hear out of them.
"Who's trying to kill you?" Sissy responded seriously.
Before Herb could tell Sissy, a group of blood-soaked, screeching ghouls jogged around the corned. They had noticed Herb & Nicholas run down the hall a few yards back and decided to follow them. They were dead in their sights as the group of ravenous zombies rushed after them.
"Sweet Jesus!" Nicholas yelled, "There's more of them!"
"What the Hell are those things?!" Sissy yelled staring at the hungry beasts with fear in her eyes.
"There's no time to explain!" Herb yelled to Sissy, "We have to keep moving!" Herb grabbed Sissy's arm and began running, Nicholas following.
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Odd sunk his teeth deep into the spicy chicken sandwich, taking a hug hunk out of it. His ability to survive the sandwich's heat never failed to impress his friends. Maybe at your school the spicy chicken sandwiches perform less of what you may expect of them, but here at Odd's boarding school, they were exceptional.
Everyone else, including Odd's closest friends, all needed to keep the sandwich in one hand and something to drink in the other. Odd, on the other hand, handled the meal like Superman, sometimes woofing it down without ever having to take a drink. Yumi and the other's just stared at him as he took the sandwich down, bite by bite.
"Y'know Odd," Ulrich said, attempting to deter Odd's bizarre and uncomfortable eating methods, "Eating that thing like that can't be good for you."
"Yeah," Yumi added, "You're going to get an ulcer one of these days."
"Bah," Odd answered swallowing his bite, "It's not like it's going to kill me or anything. Give me a break and let me enjoy my spicy chicken sandwich in peace."
Odd sunk his teeth back into his lunch as the rest of the gang resumed their meal, trying not to think about poor Odd's digestive track. Before the rest of them could even start, Sissy, Herb and Nicholas approached them. Both of them terrified and in a cold sweat.
"Ulrich," Sissy gasped, "We found you! God bless!"
"What do you want Sissy?" Yumi answered. She didn't like having to be around Sissy any longer than she absolutely had to and wanted her out of her and especially Ulrich's hair as soon as humanly possible.
"They're after us!" Nicholas pleaded, staring Yumi in the face, frightening her.
"Who's after you?" Jeremy asked.
"I don't know!" Herb responded, "But they're trying to kill us! All of us!"
The entire group went serious. Even Odd put down his sandwich long enough to listen to Sissy and the others.
"Kill you?!" Ulrich replied, "Who are they? What did you do?"
"We didn't do anything!" Herb pleaded. "We were minding our own business until they attacked us, and then they killed this girl in the hall! It was horrible!"
"What were they like?" Yumi asked.
"They were like zombies!" Nicholas answered.
"Zombies?!" Jeremy said to himself.
"Yeah, zombies." Odd said addressing Jeremy. He was still in a humorous mood for some reason, "Y'know, like in the horror movies at 10 o'clock." Jeremy grabbed Odd's sleeve lightly and pulled himself to his ear.
"This isn't funny Odd," Jeremy whispered into Odd's ear, "This could be XANA's doing."
"Where were they last time you saw them?" Ulrich asked, getting out of his seat.
"They, they" Sissy was still gasping for air, "They were right behi…"
The stampede of zombies that chased Sissy and the rest down the hall ran though the doors and into the cafeteria, an appropriate setting. Looking around at the startled students, who now had their attention, they all fixed their sights on the tables of students surrounding them, pouncing over screaming kids and knocking over lunch trays as they tore them apart, eating them alive. Some of the more curious and less intelligent students gathered around to see what the commotion was all about while the remaining members of the student body ran screaming for the front exit. Sissy, Yumi, Ulrich and the rest of them stood there frightened with eyes wide open and jaws hanging to their chests as the entourage of the living dead massacred their fellow classmates. Nicholas broke the silence between them.
"OH…CRAP!!!"
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