Warning

This story is not suitable for readers under the age of sixteen. It contains sexual content, including some non-consensual, and may offend some readers. If this subject is offensive to you, please do not read this story.

Chapter 16 - Hearts Laid Open

Getting to see Severus the next day proved more difficult than Hermione had anticipated.

Most of the morning was spent visiting Hagrid. His face was beaming as he proudly showed the three students his pumpkins, all ready for the upcoming Halloween festivities. "Reckon I'll carve 'em in a couple o' days," he had said, happily, "ready to go into the Great Hall on Halloween mornin'. I'm right proud of 'em this year. Better than ever!"

She had planned on heading down to the dungeon in the afternoon, but as she turned the corner leading to the steps, she saw Professor Dumbledore looking as though he may be going that way too. He didn't see her, and she wanted to keep it that way. The purpose of not seeing Severus the day before had been to try to avoid their relationship looking too obvious. The last thing she wanted now was for the headmaster to see her heading for the dungeon, so she made a sharp right and caught up with Harry and Ron in the library. Regretfully, she decided that it would be safer to leave it until later, and settled down for an afternoon of study.

Snape was not at dinner, but this was not unusual for a weekend - she knew he preferred the solitude of his office or rooms to the crowd of the Great Hall. She parted from Ron and Harry as they returned to Gryffindor, careful not to let them see she was heading towards the dungeons. Thankfully, they didn't ask questions when she told them simply "I'm going to meet someone. Don't wait up - I might be back late!" They were still clearly intrigued by the mystery of her new boyfriend, but she welcomed the fact that they did not continue to pester her about it.

Reaching the bottom of the steps and turning towards the classroom, something in her subconscious made her stop - some intuition, telling her that she was being watched. Catching something out of the corner of her eye, she ducked just in time to avoid a book, which narrowly missed her head as it was hurled through the air.

"Peeves!" Her guess was confirmed by his inane cackle as another book flew past her. "What are you doing here?" This was the last thing she needed right now. All she wanted to do was sink into her lover's arms and cuddle by the fire, but the annoying poltergeist could very easily spoil this.

"Don't need a reason," he said, haughtily. "But you do! What's Miss-Goody-Two-Shoes-Always-Does-Her-Homework doing here? This isn't your House."

"Did you follow me, Peeves?" she asked, avoiding his question.

He cackled again. "Wanted to see what you were up to." He suddenly swooped down on her, his mischievous face close to hers. "Where are you going?"

Hermione had to think fast. "I'm not going anywhere with you following me. In fact," she ducked underneath him and began to re-trace her steps, "I think I'll head back to the Great Hall. Maybe there's more desert left."

Peeves was disappointed. "Spoilsport!" he whined, picking up one of the thrown books and taking aim at her head once again. At that moment, a bright figure appeared from a side passage a little way off, coming closer to them. A chill went down Hermione's spine as she made out the shape of the Bloody Baron. Peeves immediately bolted in the opposite direction, and at the thought of encountering the Slytherin ghost in the dark corridor, she had to admit that he probably had the right idea. Hurriedly, she turned and walked straight into the silent shape standing behind her. For a second, she panicked, as strong arms gripped her, but relaxed as Severus' voice spoke her name.

"Professor Snape," she said, for the benefit of the ghost still advancing on them, but, as she turned, it vanished.

Severus seemed pleased with himself. "A very effective method of getting rid of Peeves!" he said. "Although you didn't seem too keen on my little diversion."

Hermione smiled awkwardly, and shivered. "Let's just say that Peeves isn't the only one who would rather not run into the Bloody Baron. He's not the most popular ghost in the school."

There was a note of humor in his voice as they headed into the Potions classroom. "And I'm not the most popular teacher," he said, "but I like to think I'm not all bad!"

The door to the dungeon classroom closed quietly behind them and, finally in privacy, they closed the distance between them. "You have a few redeeming qualities, I suppose," she smiled, as she reached up to wrap her arms around her teacher's neck.

The glow of the fire was the only light in Snape's living-room, reflecting redly onto the contented faces of the two cozy bodies in the armchair.

After a day apart, it was wonderful to be able to talk and simply enjoy each other's company. Hermione told him about the possibility of having her work published, and he was as happy for her as Ron and Harry had been, telling her how much she deserved this opportunity.

"I know," he told her, "that I'm not alone among the staff, in considering you the most gifted pupil I have taught for many years."

Ron and Harry's comments on Friday's detention amused Snape very much when Hermione relayed them, saying that they had been absolutely right about him escaping to his office just before they added the leech juice. He was not, however, impressed to hear of Professor Sprout's disclosure of the means of removing the stains.

"Damn that woman," he growled. "The first time she asked me to make that foul stuff for her, I tried everything to remove the stains on my hands. She swore that the only way was to wait for it to fade! My skin was green for three weeks!" In the interests of preserving peace amongst the staff, Hermione decided not to mention the points that Ron and Harry had earned for Gryffindor.

Snape had been correct in his assumption that Hermione would not ask for special treatment for her friends, but she did hint that she felt he was a little harsh on many of the students.

"It's the way I am," he said, warily, "and I'm not planning on changing my teaching style!"

She laughed. "Don't worry - I wouldn't dream of trying to change the way you teach. Your style is legendary, and it wouldn't be Hogwarts without it!"

"Thank you."

"Young witches and wizards hear stories from their older brothers and sisters," she continued, teasing, "and live in terror of the day they have to face their first Potions lesson with the infamous Severus Snape!"

His voice had a hint of amusement in it - just a hint. "I think you've made your point, Ms. Granger."

She turned in the chair and kissed him. Looking up into his face, she suddenly knew that she had to tell him what she was feeling. Her face became serious. "Severus," she whispered. "You do know that I'm in love with you, don't you?"

As soon as the words were out of Hermione's mouth, she regretted them. She had wanted to say it so much, and hadn't been able to stop herself, but her insecurities took hold of her and told her it had been the wrong thing to do. He was a man so much older than she - he had experiences of life beyond anything she knew - how could he possibly reciprocate what he probably saw as a childish crush. It was true that what they had seemed special - and their lovemaking was wonderful - but his actions the first time he took her showed how much he was driven by passion. For him, this was a physical relationship. Even his words when they had decided to spend Saturday apart - Not seeing you could be the death of me - seemed to demonstrate this. He couldn't possibly feel the same way about her, emotionally.

His face confirmed the fact that it had been a mistake to speak the words aloud. He looked stunned, and couldn't seem to find his voice. Was he trying to find a way to let her down gently, or just recovering from the shock, she wondered. She found herself talking quickly, to cover the awkwardness as she plunged ahead.

"I know that there's a big age gap between us," she gushed, "and that this isn't as serious for you as it is for me, but I can't help the way I feel."

"Hermione... " he began, but she continued, desperate to put off for a moment longer the pain that she knew was coming. Why had she said it?

"Severus, I know that you're a very physical and passionate man. If this relationship is about that, and you don't have real feelings for me, then I understand. I should never have said what I did."

He spoke her name again. It was soft, but with the underlying tone that he used in class - the tone that had to be listened to. "Hermione," he murmured, "you can have no possible idea how much I love you." Hermione's breath caught in her chest. Was she really hearing this? "This relationship means more to me... You mean more to me... than anything else in the world."

It was Hermione's turn to be stunned.

She stared, unbelieving, into his face, trying to sort out the emotions inside her, then slowly drew his head down to hers. They kissed deeply, both feeling that a weight had been lifted from their shoulders. For each of them, the joy of being loved greatly surpassed the thrill of loving, and their hearts burned for each other.

Eventually, they parted, still held in each other's eyes.

"So, what do we do now?" asked Hermione, softly.

Severus smiled. "Well, I have a few ideas," he said, wryly, "but I wouldn't want you to think this relationship is just about sex."

Laughing, Hermione kissed him again. "That's not what I meant, Severus!" she scolded, mockingly. "I meant that if we feel this way about each other, and want to be together, what do we do about... ?"

Severus picked up the sentence " ...Dumbledore, Potter, Weasley... ?"

"... the rest of the school?"

There were so many obstacles to their relationship. Just being able to spend time together involved deception and subterfuge. Not to mention Dumbledore's suspicions and the midnight trip, looking for her, that had earned Harry and Ron a detention.

His face was somber. "The longer we spend sneaking around, the more likely we are to be caught," he mused. "We definitely need to think about how to deal with this." His fingers were stroking her face as he spoke, and slowly began moving downwards. His eyes acquired a mischievous glint as he stroked her breast through her robes, and started gently to pull the fabric out of the way. "In the meantime," he continued, "I think my other suggestion has some merits... "

Hermione smiled.