DISCLAIMER: I do not in any way own Beyblade.

Thank you again to those who have faithfully read this story and those who have discovered it recently and to those that continue to show me that they appreciate the way that I write – it truly is an honour: Serenity Cathedral a.k.a. serena429, Minako Mikoto, FireieGurl, IchikoKitsuneKoumori, Mikin Ishida, Freaky Person O.o, Rimnerel Ayasugi

Dedication: To Jen

A/N: To everyone – my apologies for not updating as soon as I finished my exams. Parental nagging has increased 100-fold since I finished…'apply for jobs…write cover letters…finalise your CV'…and so on and so forth. But I am glad to say that I did in fact not fail anything and received two 5s and a 6 which is not exceptional by any means but considering the amount of work I actually did I think its ok…and I get that unless you go to university in Australia then you probably don't understand the scoring of the grades but so you know a 7 is the highest you can get. Well….enough about my boring, boring life and on with the fic. I know I have been saying then for a few chapters but this will probably be the second last one.

xXx

REVELATIONS

I was still lying there, flat on my back with my feet dangling in the cool water of the pond when I heard the side gate open. I held against my almost violent desire to turn my head and see if it was him. I continued to watch the clouds float past me but I was paying more attention to the sound of the footsteps approaching on the gravel.

I could feel that someone was watching me, moreover staring at me but I refused to give in and look. I was half hoping that it would be Tyson, that he would swoop down beside me and rain kisses on my lips. God! That sound most utterly and pathetically mushy! Gah! You see what he has done to me? He was turned my once sound mind into a puddle of mush.

"Kai?"

My heart sank.

As soon as I heard my name pass through those lips I knew that something big was going to happen. And I had the ominous feeling that it would turn out to be a terrible something big.

Had he finally figured out what I have been telling him – somewhat indirectly – for the past couple of days? Has he figured out that he is the one person that fits all those descriptions that I rattled off to him? Has he figured it out that I told him that I loved him?

"Kai?"

He was calling to me. I guess I should make some kind of sign to show that I had in fact heard him.

"Hn." That was all that he was getting.

"Kai, say, we need to talk."

I gave no response to that comment.

"Come on Kai. Stop being so stubborn. We need to work this out."

I sat up slowly.

"Kai, now I understand what you were telling me just before and I am sorry that I reacted as I did. You just shocked me a little bit. I didn't know you were like that."

I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Uh…uh…I didn't mean that the way that it came out. I just…..I just meant I didn't know that you were….that you were…"

"Gay?" I interrupted.

"Uh….yes."

"Okay then."

"Now come on Kai, don't be like that."

"Like what exactly?"

"All closed off and all."

I turned my face away from him.

"Kai! I'm sorry ok – this isn't coming out how I had planned."

I just sat there and waited.

"Kai. I understand ok…."

I raised my eyebrow again in question.

"I understand what it feels like to love someone and not know how they feel about you in return. Like you said – it truly is the worst feeling."

I think if I wasn't so desperately clinging to every last shred of my dignity my mouth would have fallen open in horrified shock. He was in love? He had felt it? When had this happen? Who was the….my silent tirade fell away when I looked into his eyes. They were shining brightly which didn't really make much sense to me.

"Kai. I have decided to help you obtain the love of the one that you so desire."

I stiffened in something akin to anger. I took a deep 'calming' breath that really did nothing for me and stood up rapidly.

"You really don't get it at all, do you?" I all but shouted at him and I was pleased to see his features display his surprise.

"I have tried so so very hard to remain as you all see me. Cold, emotionless, a bastard, ice man or any other adjective or whatever you all associate with me but I am tired of it Tyson. I am so tired of pretending to be something that I'm not. Sure I like to be alone sometimes and sure I do get a hell of a lot more work done when I am by myself but I could have walked away years ago but I stayed. Ok, so I did walk away but I did come back. You brought me back; extended to me your hand. Made me your friend just by insisting that that was what I was.

You make me so uncomfortable sometimes. You are the only one that was truly been able to irritate me in such a way that I was forced to retaliate. You continually stripped me of all the walls and defensive mechanisms that I have built to keep everyone else out and keep myself safe.

You made me feel and I hate you for it. I hate feeling this way. Like I never know what to say and when I do say something it always seems to be the wrong thing at the worst possible time. I hate feeling alone when I am in a room surrounded by bright people. It hurts.

It really hurts.

It hurts me to know that although I can see it and although I can almost touch it I can really ever experience it.

I'm so tired of it all.

So don't tell me you understand me Tyson, what I think or how I feel because it is obviously from where I am standing that you truly don't have even the faintest of clues."

I turned away and stormed into the house and locked myself in the bathroom. I slid down to the tiled floor. Oh my God! What on Earth have I done! I can't believe I just said all that. All of that stuff just came pouring out of my mouth. It was horrible. I couldn't get it to stop. I banged my head against the door.

God! How could I be so stupid! Gah! This is horrible. It's awful. It's beyond awful this was borderline catastrophic. How on Earth was I going to explain this one when the time comes that Tyson will stop impersonating a stunned mullet over the length of the 'speech' I just gave, gather his wits and inevitably demand to know why I just shouted all that I did to him when he though he was doing me a grand favour in gesture of our friendship by helping me win the love of the one that I desire.

I flopped down on my bed, my feet hanging over the edge almost certainly dripping water steadily onto the carpet below. I threw an arm over my face and blocked out the warm glow of the sun filtering through the window. I tried not to think about what had just happened, unfortunately for me the entire thing was reverberating through my brain at an increasing rate that got a little louder each time it was repeated.

I wondered how much time I had before my bedroom door was thrown open by a perhaps calm but most probably rather testy Tyson who demanded to know what was with me. This probably would be followed by a healthy dose 'Who the hell do you think you are?' and then this could quite possibly be followed up by a pity party where Tyson attempts to get me to talk to him about all that is bothering me.

Guess all there is for me to do is wait.

So I wonder for how long I have to wait.

xXx

I watched him walk away from me. Oh alternatively, more accurately storm away in a huge huff. I sat there in something very akin to shock.

I wonder what he meant by all that he said. I wonder what on Earth he meant by what he all but shouted at me less than thirty seconds ago. I was just offering my assistance so he could obtain something that I knew he desired. But instead of showing the tiniest part of gratitude he threw it all back in my face.

He told me that he was tired of pretending, that he was tired of being something that he isn't and that he has tried so hard to live up to what we see him as. I didn't really understand. I mean, sometimes I see something in him and it makes me wonder what he is really feeling or thinking but knowing that and acknowledging it to myself is very different to letting him know that. I guess I was scared to let him know that I thought of him as human because that meant he was really real and that gives to me at least the illusion that he is obtainable.

And Kai isn't supposed to be obtainable.

I am supposed to pine after him and not delude myself into thinking that I could actually ever be with him.

When he told me that he was in love with someone it saddened me because I couldn't help but think that if only I had a little more courage I could have made him mine.

When he told me that he was in love with a man I very nearly died from shock. And although I led him to believe that it was due to the fact that I hadn't known he swung that way it was closer to the fact that I was mentally kicking myself. He was into men. I was a man……my brain was making all sorts of leaps and bounds – some in which should have remained as nothing but shadows of whispers in my thoughts.

What he said to me made it sound like I was the only person that ever got under his skin. This confused me to no end as he had previously told me that the only person he accredited that to was the person he was in love with.

I wish he could make up his mind - me or this other guy.

My heart skipped a beat when he told me that I make him feel and then I felt it plummet down to my toes when he told me that he hated me for that. And it was about three seconds after that shock that I realised what he was really saying. He hated the way that I made him feel…did that mean he liked what he felt and was then ashamed by it or was it more that he just didn't like it…or was it….oh hell…I have absolutely no idea what I was trying to reason.

He said it hurts…what exactly hurts. He accused me of not understanding. I thought I was doing a pretty good job at comprehending what he had previously told me. He told me he was in love. I could relate to that. He told me he was in love with someone that would never return that love. I could relate to that. He told me he was in love with a man. That was something I could definitely relate too. So I don't understand what it is that I don't understand about him and his situation. Of course that is if you discount the fact that he leaves me almost completely at a loss a whole hell of a lot of the time,

After trying and failing stupendously to understand what the Hell had just happened not minutes before I decided that instead of trying to work it out all on my lonesome I would go straight to the source of all of my confusion and simply demand that he explain himself plainly.

Yes…that is exactly what I will do.

Straight to the source…

Make him talk….

I set off on my quest but the tell tale shake of my hands and the simple fact that I was absolutely terrified kind of put a dampener on my resolute spirit.

I just wanted to know.

I stuffed my hands in my pockets.

If he can't see it…. he won't know.

xXx

A/N: Hey there guys. The next chapter will be the confrontation I'm thinking….won't know for sure till I go to write it.

I hope that you like this chapter. I apologize if it sounds off…I tried to make it flow as best I could – I wrote it over several days…..going on weeks actually. Been applying for jobs in the UK. It would be grand if I could land one. Would be such an experience….okies I won't bore you…

Be safe

-BG