III – No more words
A.N.: Wanna thank all my reviewers. Hope you like chapter 3.
Disclaimer: All the characters in this fanfic belong to Squaresoft. I don't own them and no profit is being made of this.
She had lost her mind. She was totally sure by now. She hadn't just lost her memory – no, she had lost her whole goddamn mind. Why else would she go back to the infirmary voluntarily?
With her heart pounding faster than the headache she had had when she had woken up in Balamb Garden again, Fujin walked straight towards the part of BG she hated most. Next to her Raijin and Seifer were carefully guarding her… or watching out that she didn't run away in the last moment. This wasn't voluntarily. If it hadn't been Seifer's turn to come up with that idea, she would have gone mad and would have locked herself in her dorm for the rest of the rest of the day.
The doctor had the same annoyingly friendly smile on her face as she always had, when she motioned the three of them to sit down. Nevertheless, her smile couldn't distract Fujin from the memo pad lying on the desk. Everything she said here would be written down, recorded for later analysis when she as the patient wasn't around.
"It's just a little talk, ya know. Just answer a few questions and then everything will be fine." She smiled a bit at the man who was said to be her brother, the Guardian.
When they had finally sat down, she folded her hands in her lap and tried to keep an icy face. Best would be to make that as short as possible.
"Miss Kazeno, I'm glad you've finally come here without being seriously wounded. How are you? Does the head wound still hurt?"
"Negative. Feel fine. Nervous." She tried to explain and wished she could just rush out of that room and never return again. With Seifer and Raijin sitting next to her, she wouldn't even get to the door. "Questions. Ask."
Dr. Kadowaki took in a deep breath. She would pay 2000 Gil just to hear Fujin say one sentence in a usually, longer structure. "Seifer came to me with an interesting thought yesterday and I wondered if it would help you regain your memory." She could see Fujin's eyes sparkle with interest for a moment. Perfect.
"He mentioned you had said something interesting in the cafeteria yesterday, when Rinoa Heartilly and Selphie Tilmitt came over to your table. He said you had murmured something like "Angel" and "elfin". Is that right?"
"Affirmative." Her crimson eye focused on Seifer shortly. Seemed like he was trying the icy-face-method, too. "Why matter?"
"Miss Kazeno…" She tried to express it in a most calmly and friendly way. "Can we agree on this being the first thing that came to your head, when looking at the two girls?"
"A…Affirmative." What the heck was this supposed to be? Why did they care?
"Miss Kazeno, I want to try something. Tell me the first three things you would connect with the word "angel. Features, abilities, anything."
"Beauty. Serenity. Kindness." A sudden idea came to her mind. "Try find memory. Trace back."
"Exactly." She was glad Fujin didn't sound like she was going to storm off the room within the next few minutes. She had always considered Fujin a clever woman. Now she had just proved it. "You probably connected those three words or something similar with Rinoa at first sight. As you're used to expressing your opinion in one-word-sentences, you're subconscious might have connected the symbol for those three words with Rinoa. And despite the damage the accident caused in your memory, it didn't reach your subconscious."
"Hey, Fuu, that means you'll probably be able to remember soon, ya know." Raijin concluded exited. "That's what it means, isn't it Doctor?"
"Don't move too fast, Raijin." His happiness made Dr. Kadowaki laugh lightly. He almost sounded like a child that got to meet his best friend after three weeks of vacation again. "Your sister needs time to remember all the details. Names don't help much. She'll need a central point for orientation and it's not that easy." She turned to her patient again, whose look hadn't changed a bit. "Rinoa is quite a stranger for you, of course. Let's try another person you're closer connected to. What about Raijin, your brother. What was the first thing that came to your mind?"
"Guardian." She risked an insecure look at the young man. "Protective. Trust. Comfort."
She took a moment to think everything over. In a way everything she described her guardian as could also work for the word brother. It just hadn't come to her mind that easily. Memories struck her like a bolt of lightning, his favourite. "Didn't call brother. Long time."
"Well, that's true, ya know." Raijin managed with a smile. He could feel his heart roar like mad. "Didn't call me that for a long time, just kicked my shin every once in a while." She smiled back shortly. "Bought three. Nevertheless." His loud laughter filled the room and the ones next to. "I had seen them, ya know. Felt good to know ya still like me."
Nodding shortly towards Seifer, Dr. Kadowaki gave the siblings a few seconds to just be glad about remembering each other again. Fujin had really done a good job. And so did Seifer. "Miss Kazeno." Fujin's attention snapped back immediately. Seemed as if the Doctor hadn't finished yet. "What about Seifer?"
She hesitated for a moment. Should she…? "Knight." She whispered and suddenly was incredibly glad she hadn't choked on the word. "Protective. Leader. Courage. …" She found herself wanting to continue, but shoved the thought away. Not more than three features. Not more… "My leader." She added after some careful consideration. And gazed at Seifer. "Me, second in command. Worried."
The words struck through his heart like Hyperion normally did through monsters. He hadn't imagined Fujin Kazeno, the heartless, to be worried about anything except possibly losing a fight. He hadn't known she had worried enough to make it the first thing to remember about him after the accident.
"Seems like we've figured out the right method." Dr. Kadowaki stated proudly. "If you continue using that word system you might even remember all the names again, but there is another thing we need to settle before I can dismiss you." She opened one of the shelves of the desk, took out a small mirror and handed it over to Fujin. "Who do you see, Miss Kazeno?"
She was surprised, stunned, maybe even shocked. She stared at the mirror, and realised why she had probably removed all mirrors from her dorm. There was the palest face she had ever seen, a crimson eye and another one with an eye patch on it. She knew what was beneath. An ugly scar. An ugly face framed by ugly grey hair.
She would never find a boyfriend. He had told her often enough. She would stay alone for the rest of her life. She would freeze to death emotionally.
Taking a deep breath she looked out of the window and fear crept across her face. "Fujin Kazeno. Member of Disciplinary Committee." She answered, trying to make it sound convincing.
"Fuu…" Her knight tried to take one of her hands she had clenched to fists by now, but she jerked away. They wouldn't believe her, she knew. No one, never. Her gaze lingered on the window. In her memory thick, white flakes kept falling down to the ground in a horrifying quiet and peaceful manner. But it wasn't peaceful, wasn't quiet. It would never be...