Chapter 27
I was awakened the next morning by a knock on my door. I expected it to be my father, Gawain was probably still in bed. I opened the door and was instead pleasantly surprised, it was Phillip.
"Phillip what are you doing up so early, and knocking on my door none the less?" I asked with a sleepy grin.
"Taryn, I had to talk to you before I left." He replied.
"What do you mean? Where are you going?" I asked for Phillip did not leave the fort often.
"Arthur is sending me to Rome with a message to the Bishop. I am not sure when or if I will return."
"Phillip, why won't you be coming back, someone will have to return with a message."
"Yes, but that does not mean it will be me. My father has been trying to gain permission for me to return home since I received word that I had to stay longer. He wrote to me that my mother has not been in good health, and she would like to see me. They are not sure she will live much longer." He said sadly.
"Phillip, I am so sorry. Why did you not tell me this before?" I said laying my hand gently on his arm.
"There is nothing you could have done Taryn, except feel bad for me so I saw no use in bogging you down with my troubles." He answered.
"Phillip, you are my best friend that hurts me that you did not think your troubles were important to me. You have helped me on so many occasions feel better about myself or a situation. You should have given me a chance." I scolded, trying not to be too hard on him, but I was disappointed he did not talk to me sooner.
"I am sorry; I did not mean to imply you would not care, for I know you would Taryn. I must be going now though. Arthur wants me to make the ship in two days, and I will have to ride quickly to do that."
"Phillip, I can't believe this is goodbye. You are certain that you will not be coming back?" I questioned, not really believing I would possibly never see him again.
"I am certain of nothing Taryn" He said grabbing hold of both of my shoulders. "I am certain that I will miss you, and that I love you." He said softly.
I went immediately into his arms hugging him, my dear friend tightly. I knew one day he would have to go back to Rome, but I did not expect it to be so soon. I clung to him, the tears rolling down my cheeks. "One last kiss?" He whispered in my ear.
I nodded my head, and tilted my face toward his. "I will always have a kiss for you my dear Phillip. I will miss you so, and you know I love you also." I raised my lips toward his for what would be our second and final kiss. His lips met mine with a passion I did not expect from him. I would not ruin our last moment together, so instead of pulling back, I kissed him back. He knew where my heart belonged, but he loved me anyway, with a love that I did not deserve. I clasped my hands around his neck to hold him closer for one last moment. I am not sure how long the kiss would have lasted, for like last time we were interrupted.
Phillip had left the door open when he came in, so we did not notice that our actions were being watched. "Taryn, I believe you have finally made your choice once and for all." I heard an angry voice say from the door way. I turned around to see Gawain standing in the doorway. The look on his face was not a happy one.
"Gawain it's not what you think." I tried to explain, but he did not take the time to listen, for he was already storming down the hall. I started to go after him, but then remembered Phillip.
"I will just have to explain to him later." I said shrugging my shoulders to Phillip.
"If you must. I need to be going. Do you want to walk down with me?" He asked.
"I would love to Phillip." I said with a smile, for I would miss my friend.
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Gawain was nowhere to be found that afternoon. Lancelot said he had seen him leave to go hunting with Galahad. I don't know why he was so upset. I was merely telling Phillip goodbye. It was not as if I was pledging my undying love for him. Then I remembered, I had told Phillip I loved him. Of course I loved him. Like a friend a brother, he knows that is all I meant, but if Gawain overheard he may not have taken it that way. For I had not even told him that I loved him yet.
I had much explaining to do now. That was the truth of it. If only he would come home. I thought about going after him, but maybe it would be better if I let him cool down a bit. So instead I went in search of Verona. She always had good advice in situations like this.
"A fine mess you have got yourself in this time Taryn." Vanora said after I told her the whole story. "I can tell you why Tristan does not want you with a knight. They all have horrible tempers."
"But Gawain is usually so easy going." I said.
"Yes, they can all laugh and joke, but when it comes to something they care about, they are very passionate. Even my Bors." She said with a laugh.
"What should I do Vanora?" I asked helplessly.
"Well I can almost guarantee you where he will be tonight." She said with a slow smile.
"The tavern?" I replied.
"Yes, and if I were you, I would show up there in my best dress, and make him listen to me." She said.
"But what if Tristan is there?" I questioned.
"Taryn, you are almost a grown woman. I know you want it, but you do not need Tristan's approval. Besides he will come around. I know when it comes down to it, he will want you to be with one of the men he has come to care about and trust. Do what your heart leads you to do Taryn. That is my advice for the day. Now you need to go get ready."
"Thank you Vanora. I don't know what I would do without you." I said leaning over to give the older woman a hug.
"Goodbye Taryn." She called after me as I was already heading out the door.
I ran to my room, and decided I would take Vanora's advice. I filled my tub with warm water, and poured in some of my remaining bath scents. I took time to scrub every inch of my dust covered body, and carefully washed out my long wavy hair. After much soaking the water had turned a dingy brown color, and was starting to cool, I thought I probably better get out, before I became a shriveled prune.
I pulled my green dress out. The one Vanora had gotten for me; I had not worn it much. I did not usually have an occasion to wear such a nice dress, but I guess tonight was as good as any. I brushed my hair out and let it hang loose until it dried. It was halfway down my back and the summer sun had lightened it, adding specks of gold into my dark brown.
I slipped the dress over my head. The soft folds feeling so good on my skin, compared to the rough tunics and trousers I normally wore. I looked in the mirror at my reflection and decided to let my hair hang loose. I thought I looked better than normal tonight. Lancelot had called me beautiful at one time. I knew I was not beautiful, and he was only trying to be flattering, but at least tonight I considered myself pretty.
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Whatever I imagined my evening to be like, nothing could have compared to what I found when I swung open the door to the tavern. Gawain was there, just like Vanora had predicted, but he was not alone. There was not one, but two girls draped all over him. I had not seen them before; they must have only found work here recently. The sight of it made my stomach turn. I froze where I stood for a moment, the shock must have been evident on my face. Then the shock was replaced by a weird nausea. I could not decide if I should go and slap him, or just turn around and run.
I had decided on the later when I was stopped by a hand grabbing my wrist. "Taryn where are you going?" I looked up into the dark eyes of my father.
"Tristan, I was just heading back to my room. I suddenly don't feel well." I stammered gazing over to the table occupied by Gawain and company. He followed my gaze.
"And what would that prove to him?" He asked eyebrows raised.
"What do you mean?" I asked, not understanding how he knew what I was feeling.
"I see more than you think Taryn. You need to decide now are you going to run away when trouble comes, or do you face it, and accept the consequences?" He so wisely stated.
"I don't want to look at him, much less talk to him." I muttered.
"Take your pick Daughter, you can follow this" he pointed to my chest. "Or this" He then pointed to my head. "Choose well." He said surprising me by bending down and placing a kiss on my forehead. He then reached over and picked up his mug of ale, and left through the doors I had just came.
Follow my head or my heart. What kind of advice is that? Most assuredly not the kind I had expected to receive from Tristan. I am not even sure which was telling me what. I paused for a moment to take a deep breath. My head, I would listen to my head, which told me confront the pig of a man now before he or I makes a bigger mistake.
I marched over to his table; unfortunately my heart was taking over also, for the anger began to build with every step I took. Soon I was standing over him, looking down to where the blonde head was nuzzled into his chest.
"Gawain we need to talk!" I said loudly.
"Go away." He slurred, obviously he was already drunk.
"You are drunk Gawain." I shouted back at him over the dull roar of the tavern.
"No really Taryn? I didn't know that. Lancelot had it right; you always do state the obvious. Now leave me alone, I plan on getting even more drunk." He continued, his tongue seeming more thick the more he talked.
"I am not leaving until you talk to me." I said firmly.
"Go talk to Phillip, I am talking to…. What are your names again?" He asked the two women practically laying on him. "Maggie and Annie, but you can call us whatever you like." The blonde said, totally ignoring my presence.
"Phillip is gone. That is what I need to tell you." I reached a hand out to touch the only part of his arm that was not covered in woman. He stood up brushing the woman off his lap. I waited for him to excuse them and leave with me, but the exact opposite happened.
"Come on girls, if she wont go somewhere else, we will." He started to stumble, but was held upright, by his companions. They both stationed themselves under each arm, and helped him stumble right out the door.
I slumped to the table, putting my hands in my head, not believing what had just happened. I felt the warm tears start to spill over my eyelids. I sat there for several moments knowing I had made the wrong choice. My heart told me to run, get away from him, before I was hurt worse. What he had just done to me was unforgivable. I could feel the eyes of the other patrons of the tavern burning holes into my back. I did not hear it, but I know they were all laughing at me. I had to get out of there, but the thought of raising my head to face them, was almost more than I could bear.
"Taryn, what are you doing here all by yourself." I heard a voice above me ask.
"Leave me alone." I muttered.
"I am not leaving until you tell me what is wrong." Lancelot replied sitting down next to me.
I raised my red tear stained face up to meet his. "I can't, can't talk about it." I choked out.
"Does this have anything to do with the knight I just passed walking, or should I say being nearly carried down the hall." He asked.
"How did you know?" I asked.
"Do you think we are all blind Taryn? We all know he has feelings for you, and now I know you return them." He said with a pleased expression on his face.
"Lancelot whatever I did feel for him is gone. He was rude to me, and humiliated me in front of everyone here." I said looking around the room. Only no one seemed to be paying a bit of attention to me. They were busy with there own troubles.
"What did you do to him?" He asked.
"What!" I nearly shouted at him. "I did nothing wrong, he has no reason to be cross with me."
"Then I guess I better go kill him." Lancelot said rising to his feet.
"No!" I said grabbing Lance's arm stopping him from leaving. "Is that how you knights solve all your problems, just kill it?"
He threw back his head, and let out a long laugh. "Taryn, Gawain annoys the hell out of me sometimes, but did you really think I would kill him, for insulting you?" He said still chuckling.
"Well no, I mean yes. You say you are my brother, isn't that what big brothers do? Beat up or sometimes kill whoever mistreats their sister." I asked.
"Yes, I must admit, I did beat up many boys in my sisters honor, back home, but kill, definitely not. Here we find much better reasons to kill people, such as, wearing blue paint, or not sounding Romanish enough, or talking bad about the holy Roman Pope." He said anger flashing across his face.
"Lancelot." I said quietly placing my hand on his wrist. "Could we focus on me here?" That statement brought him back to the present, and he began to laugh again.
"Taryn, he will sober up in the morning, and all will be well." Lancelot said patting me on the back.
"I fear the damage done is far worse than that Lancelot. Maybe if he was alone and angry, that would be one thing, but to turn to another woman, I mean two woman, that is unforgivable." I said angrily.
"I have to give it to him, what women see in his, stinking drunk butt, I will never know." He laughed. "But rest assured Taryn, nothing will happen, he will pass out probably before he even reaches his room."
"You don't know that Lancelot, and I can only imagine the worst. I don't think I want to talk to him again in the morning." I said quietly.
"I am going to bed, goodnight Lancelot, thanks for trying to cheer me up." I said rising to leave.
"Taryn, wait." He said. I stopped to look at him. "Drink this, it will help you sleep." He said raising his glass of ale to me.
"No thanks. I had enough of that to last me a life time. It may make me sleep tonight, but my problems will still be here in the morning, again goodnight." I said this time leaving the tavern behind, and heading up to my room, alone.
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It had been two weeks, and we had still not talked. I had went to his room the next morning, but when I was greeted by a sleepy woman, I knew my decision had been the right one. Gawain and me, me and Gawain, we were over. I now understood why Tristan had not wanted me to be with a knight. They were stubborn, ill tempered womanizing pigs. Well maybe it was not fair to classify them all as that, but I knew one was, without a doubt. I felt my heart harden a little more every time I looked at him.
Another two weeks went by, the knights had left to make rounds of the nearby villages, but I had chosen to stay home. The messenger from Rome finally arrived, but it was not Phillip. I tried questioning the man, but he had no idea who Phillip was, or what became of the messenger originally sent to Rome, only that he had been the only one sent to come back.
I was disappointed to say the least. In just a matter of a month, I had lost my two best friends, and possible lovers. I am not sure which one my heart ached for more. The one who was torn away by circumstance or the one who had hurt me so, and done nothing to fix that hurt.
By the time frame the knights had figured we would be leaving for home in less than a month's time. There was no word of a Saxon invasion; Arthur told us when he returned home to receive the message from Rome. He also confirmed the knight's guesses. For their discharge papers should arrive to Britain in three weeks time. Three weeks and we would be returning home. Yes, I would be going back to my home the one I came from. There would be no wondering which tribe I would go back to. I just prayed Tristan would not marry me off to the man I had ran away from in the first place. I would run again if I had to.
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One week in counting until the arrival of the papers. Everyone was trying to stay busy, and pass the time. All praying no great conflict would arrive that would risk one more of their lives especially when freedom was so close. Galahad and I were sparring in the practice arena with wooden weapons. I could hold my own pretty well against him, but beat him, no. "You are getting pretty good Taryn." Galahad commented as we sat down to rest.
"Any halfway trained woad could kill her easily enough." Gawain muttered from where he sat a few feet away from us. We had gotten pretty good at ignoring each other, so I was quite surprised when he even acknowledged I was there. I was not about to let the opportunity pass. I rose from where I sat and walked over to stand over him.
"Is that a fact?" I asked meeting his gaze with my challenging one. He rose so he was now towering above me.
"Yes Taryn, I believe it is." He said slowly a grin starting to spread on his face.
I felt the anger well up in me. I am not sure it was at myself, for the way my heart leapt when he said my name, or because he was taunting me.
"Fine, you think I am so weak. You and me, here now." I said pointing my sword at him.
"You're challenging me?" He said eyebrows raised.
"Yes Gawain, I believe I am." I said throwing his words back at him.
He gave me a wild grin, which made me want to smack him, or rip his clothes off, I am not sure which. I went with the first one, and swiped at his midsection with my long sword.
"My my Taryn, you have changed, attacking an unarmed man?" he said mockingly, bending down to pick up the wooden sword Galahad had been using.
"You can manage, you always do." I said stepping back into the arena. He followed sword in hand.
I immediately attacked him, using all my pent up emotions as energy. He blocked my onslaught of blows easily enough, but he did seem surprised at how fast and how accurate they were. He then came back at me. Swiping here and slashing there. I had to be quick on my feet to escape several of his blows. Soon I knew we had an audience, for I was being cheered on by all the knights. Their cheers helped me carry on, for I was already starting to become weary. It did not take long for Gawain to take advantage of my tiring state. For with a flick of his wrist, he sent my sword sailing through the air.
I was quick to react though, and soon had my tridents in my hand. Only not my wooden ones. He went to swing at me, and the end of my sharp trident made short work of his wooden sword.
Gawain looked down to see over half of his sword missing. "Playing dirty now are we, little one?" He commented while pulling two of his daggers from his side.
I did not answer, but only attacked again. He was prepared, it was as if he knew my actions before I did. He warded of my blows, and then made a quick move of his own, pinning my arms at my side and pulling me close to him. "Looks like you lose." He said with a grin.
I was not done yet though. I brought my knee, firmly up, and into his groin. Like I expected he fell to his knees groaning in pain. I reached down and loosely grabbed a handful of his hair, and held my trident at his throat. "Wrong you loose." I said triumphantly.
My triumph did not last long, for a strong hand grabbed my ankle, and pulled me to the ground. My back hit the ground first, and then the air left my lungs with a whoosh. As I was gasping for air, He rolled over on top of me, and pulled my own trident up to my neck, his hand over top off mine. "It looks like we both lost." He said softly.
"Gawain", I choked, "I can't breathe" I said tears starting to sting my eyes. He rolled of me quickly, and pulled me up into a sitting position. I was gasping for air, trying to regain all that had left me.
"Sorry, didn't meant to knock the wind out of you" he said with a concerned look on his face.
I looked around the arena, to find our audience suddenly gone; it was only he and I. I took another deep breath. "I am sorry I hurt you", I said glancing at the place between his legs that he was still holding, "But unlike you I meant to." I said a grin suddenly appearing, but at the same time the tears started falling.
"So I guess this means we are talking again." He said reaching out to wipe the tears away.
"Yes I guess it does."
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Yeah! Finally I got over Constantine, and my dog was returned! So I can write again. I hope you like what I did in this chapter. Hopefully no one will kill me for breaking up Gawain and Taryn before they got together, but as you can see things will probably mend. Don't count Phillip out yet! I hope I did not advance the story too much. Next chapter will probably be catching up to the movie, which will signify the coming end of the story. I love my story, but I can't wait, because I have an idea for a new one, and I will not start it until this one is done. Please tell me what you all think! Thanks as always for reading.
Now I will try to catch up on the reviews more personally, especially the ones with questions.
Cameryn: Thanks again for your review. I am glad you liked my revision of chapter 25. I really appreciate your advice, please keep it coming. I was more mad at myself when I was ranting on about it, because I knew it was a bad few pages. Glad you liked the Lena thing. I am not sure how much more I will write her into the story. I hope I explained more about Tristan's not wanting her to be with a Knight. He had been with them for 15 years new all there was about them, and then to trust his baby daughter with one of them. He is having a change of heart though. I agree, I would take a knight back then any day, lol.
Lucillaq: Thanks for the compliments, I hope I am explaining things better. I agree, no way will Taryn let anyone choose the man for her!
Valerie: The friction was all for you! Hope you liked it.
History2: Thanks for your review. I am so glad you liked how I worked the Lena thing, I wasn't sure how it would go over. I agree with you a little more fighting, but a semi-happy ending.
Babaksmiles: Not quite fire works, but I did my best on 26.
Brandy Lebeau: I thought the threatening part showed her firery streak also. I hope chapter 27, does also.
Modernprincess: I know what it is like to be to busy to review, but I so appreciate it. It makes me want to keep it up.
Marianna: Thanks for the compliment. Do you have any ideas for Lena? I already have one for Phillip, but not sure if I should write much more about Lena, or leave her be.
Krisy8930: Yes Taryn is a drama queen, her life is surrounded by it, so unlike my own, "Pouts" Yes I feel badly for I am not nice as a writer to Phillip. Thanks for reading!
Zelinia: She will not actually be with both of them, no threesomes in this story. Again, I am sorry, for I am not being nice to Phillip in this story. I forgive you for not watching American Idol, lol, you are probably right, total waste of time!
Elfvamp: Yes wouldn't it be cool to have Tristan as a father. Thanks for reading.
Tracy 137: Thanks for your reviews, hope you like this one. I know what you mean about having trouble about writing about Gawain. Until I started this story, he was my least favorite character, but once I started writing him, I started to really like him. Give him a try, it is better than you think. I have been so busy, I have fallen behind in your story, can't wait to catch up on it, you are a great writer, I value your review, thanks!
Lancelottristanbaby: Thanks for the review, I like happy endings also. I just couldn't make Gawain the father!
Irishfire: Thanks for the review. Isn't it awful to loose a dog, I guess the people that found her decided they wanted the reward money more than her. Glad you like the Lancelot Taryn interaction, I try so hard not to take him out of character, but I have to have him in my story, what is a KA story without Lancelot.
Charlie: I am so glad you like it, thanks for the review.
Jedipirateelfydude: Yeah, a Constantine fan!
Vivalarock: I am sure you are a very cute girl, lol! Glad you liked the chapter.
WildGoalie06: Another Constantine fan! Thanks so much for reading, and reviewing, glad you like it!
Camlann: It is hard to write, and catch up on reading also, I understand. Thanks for the review. Oh I was never clear as how old Gawain was, I am guessing 25-27 what do you think?
True Luv Waits: If I have never mentioned it, I love your screen name. Thanks for the review.
A : Prayers work, my four year olds said a lot, and doggy came home!