Chapter 29
The tavern was overcrowded with patrons that night. Tables and bonfires had been set up in the outer courtyard. This is where I found the knights, most of which were already half drunk. I even saw a slight sway to Tristan's normally steady gait. Lancelot was drinking and gambling with Romans. Not a good combination I thought to myself, as I watched him slam his knife into the table inches from a Roman's hand.
Gawain was throwing daggers at a wooden post with Galahad behind him laughing loudly in his drunken state. Helena was perched on Galahad's lap enjoying the show thoroughly.
I noticed Bors just a few feet from me, holding his and Vanora's youngest child, baby Hector. "Are you on babysitting duty tonight Bors?" I teased the obviously proud papa.
"Yeah, Vanora's working." He said nodding to a bustling Vanora, whom at present was being swept onto Lancelot's lap. He was rewarded with a resounding slap on the cheek.
I saw Bors lower Hector and study him carefully. "You look nothing like him. You are all Bors." He said to the crying baby.
In spite of myself, I started chuckling. "You have lived with him long enough Bors, you should realize Lancelot is all talk." I said trying to help reassure the big man. I looked over to where Lancelot sat, he was grinning wickedly, as if he could hear across the noisy yard what we were talking about.
I noticed Galahad and Gawain had switched places, it was Galahad's turn to throw. Gawain was enjoying a neck rub, compliments of Helene. I couldn't help it, I threw a glare her direction. Galahad made a very poor throw, landing well below the mark. Out of nowhere a dagger flew landing in the center of Galahad's own dagger.
"How do you do that Tristan?" Gawain asked.
"I aim for the middle." He said shortly chewing on an apple.
Helena had taken my hint and moved away from Gawain to find another man to entertain. I took her place behind him, without him knowing and began to knead his shoulders slowly.
"Hmm, that's nice." He murmured thoroughly enjoying my massage.
He caught me off guard by pulling me around into his lap. He did not seem to notice the switch of woman. He bent his head and gave me a hasty kiss. I don't know if he sensed it, but the moments after our lips touched his eyes opened. "Taryn." He said my name softly, causing my heart to stir. "This is a pleasant surprise." He said his eyes boring into mine. He did not seem angry at all, as I had feared. My thoughts and his were both interrupted by the sound of singing.
Vanora was singing in her hauntingly beautiful voice a song, the same type of song that was running through all of our heads. Home, we will go home. Gawain pulled me back closer on his lap, wrapping his arms around me, as we all sat transfixed listening to her song.
We will go home, we will go home
We will go home across the mountains.
The song was cut short on its second verse, by the awaited arrival of Arthur.
"Arthur." Galahad called to his commander.
Gawain gently set me off of his lap, as we all made our way toward him. Arthur walked slowly toward us. The look on his face was dark and troubling.
"Knights, Brothers in arms." Arthur said looking at each of the knights, the same grim look on his face. "Your courage has been tested beyond all limits, but I must ask one further trial of you."
"Drink!" Bors called out, missing the tone in Arthur's voice. He received a cheer from the knights.
"We must leave on one final mission for Rome, before our freedom can be granted." He said darkly.
The knights all began to laugh. Arthur was not one for joking, but what he had just told them, was beyond belief.
"Above the wall far to the north, there is a Roman family in need of rescuing. They are trapped by Saxons. Our orders are to secure there safety." Arthur continued, but was interrupted by and angry Bors.
"Well let the Romans take care of their own." Bors said gruffly looking at his fellow knights for approval.
"Above the wall is woad territory." Gawain added.
"Our duty to Rome, if it ever was a duty is done. Our pact with Rome is done." Galahad spat out passionately.
"Every knight here has laid his life on the line for you. For you." Bors said pointing straight at Arthur. "And instead of freedom you want more blood? Our blood? You think more of Roman blood than ours?" Bors was growing more angry by the second. I looked to Tristan to see his reaction, he was calmly slicing an apple. His calmness in this situation unnerved me. For I, like Bors and Galahad was ready to start shouting.
"These are our orders. We leave at first light, and when we return your freedom will be waiting you." Arthur said firmly. It was growing obvious he had no say in the matter. "A freedom we can embrace with honor."
"I'm a free man!" Shouted Bors. "I will choose my own fight."
"Yeah, yeah, we are all going to die someday. If it is a death at a Saxon hand that frightens you. Stay home." Tristan said not bothering to look up from his apple.
"If your so eager to die, you can die right now." Galahad said infuriated by Tristan's words.
"Enough, enough." Said Lancelot stepping between the two men.
"I have something to live for." Galahad continued to shout.
"The Romans have broken their word. We have the word of Arthur. That is good enough. I will prepare." I was surprised to hear the usual quiet Dagonet speak up, but it did not surprise me he would react that way. He was noble, and pure of heart, and his words seemed to calm the volatile discussion.
"Bors you going?" Dag asked as he was leaving to do just as he said he would.
"Of course I am going! Can't let you all get killed." Bors screamed to his friend.
"And you Gawain?" Arthur asked.
"I'm with you, Galahad as well." He replied speaking for his angry friend. Galahad gave him a questioning look, for it was all to obvious he wanted nothing of this mission.
He let out a sad little laugh, and threw his pitcher of wine to the ground smashing it at Arthur's feet. I think it was his way of saying, I'm going, but I am not going to like it.
I had nothing to say to Arthur, what could I say, that this is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of. No I think not, that would get me nowhere. Instead I shrugged my shoulders and ran to catch up with Galahad and Gawain.
"Gawain" I called. They both turned to look at me. Galahad's eyes still held the same fury he had moments ago. "Wait up." They stopped and both eyed me waiting for me to speak. I suddenly did not know what to say.
"What does this mean?" I asked not knowing what else to say.
"Are you stupid Taryn? Use your head what do you think it means. We will all go into woad territory, and be slaughtered like animals. The Roman family is as good as dead, and so are we." He snapped at me bringing tears to my eyes at his harsh tone.
"Galahad, I know you are upset, but that is no reason to take it out on Taryn." Gawain said giving his friend a disapproving look.
"Go ahead Gawain, side with everyone but me." Galahad said just before turning and storming away.
"He will cool down by morning, he will regret being harsh with you." Gawain explained for him.
"It was a dumb thing to say. But is what he said really true Gawain, does this mission mean certain death?" I asked with fear in my heart.
"We have been facing death for fifteen years. This is no different. It is just a bitter disappointment." He said gently.
"I will go with you." I said with a sudden resolve.
"No Taryn, you can't. The danger will be so great, that even the knights are fearful. You must remain here." He said placing his hands on my shoulder giving me a small shake as if to make sure I understood.
"Gawain if something were to happen, what would I do, where would I…." My thought was cut short, by my name being called loudly.
"Taryn." I turned to see Phillip coming toward me. "I have been looking all over for you." He said grabbing me around my waist, failing to notice my companion.
Gawain looked at the two of us and started to walk away. "Gawain wait." I said pushing Phillip away, the same time he noticed Gawain.
"I will tell you what you will do Taryn. Marry Phillip move to Rome, and forget any of us existed." He said and then left angrily in the direction of his room.
I turned on Phillip suddenly very angry. "Phillip you have the most inopportune times of showing up."
"That is fine, I will leave then." He turned to leave a hurt expression flashing briefly on his face.
"Phillip, wait, I didn't mean it like that." I said suddenly feeling very guilty.
"Yes you did, you are usually just too kind to say it." He replied shortly.
"Did you hear what the Bishop has done?" I asked wondering if he had known all along.
"Yes I have heard of the mission. They will survive, the whole group of them are fighters and survivors. It is in your blood. If you weren't the Romans would have wiped you out hundreds of years ago." He stated bluntly.
"But Phillip they are seven against an army of hundreds maybe even thousands!"
"Then I suggest they stay out of the path of the Saxons." He said still appearing half angry with me.
"What like you will, and the Romans?" I said feeling angry all over again with him.
"Phillip do you forget you are half Britain? Your mother's people, maybe even some of your family will soon be slaughtered, by invading forces. Do you even care, or are you just to anxious to get back to Rome?" I snapped at him, his face fell slightly at my words.
"What am I to do Taryn? I am only one man." He said sadly, and with that he kissed me lightly on the forehead. "Goodnight my dear, go find your knight."
As I watched him walk away, I felt badly for being harsh with him, but it wasn't right. Why did the knights have to stay and face the Saxons, just to save a Roman family, when all the Britain's would be left defenseless.
I walked up to my room alone, well not totally alone, Ursula saw me and joined me. When I opened the door I was greeted with a gust of cool air. I had left my window open that morning, and the cool night air was pouring in. I promptly closed it, and went to the fireplace to begin to start a fire. The flames grew quickly on the dried grass I used to start the fire, and soon they were licking at the logs. I watched them and my mind wandered back to Gawain.
How could things be going so good, and then he suddenly turn on me like that. Did he really think I cared about Phillip enough to run off with him? He should know me better than that. He scolded Galahad for speaking harshly to me, but his words and actions hurt so much more.
I heard a sound coming from Gawain's room. There was metal clanging, the sound of heavy objects being moved across the floor, and an occasional grunt, or curse. "What is that man doing?" I said to my four legged friend. She gave a short bark in response. "You're right, I will go find out." I replied, and then laughed at myself for talking so to my dog.
Having made up my mind, I left my room, and went straight to Gawain's. I did not bother knocking, I just threw the unlocked door open. I gasped at what I saw. Gawain's room had been totally turned upside down. Clothing here, weapons there, furniture out of place. The strangest thing of all was Gawain, clothed only in a shirt on his hands and knees looking under his bed.
"What are you doing?" I said right before bursting out laughing.
He turned to glare at me. "Haven't you heard of knocking?" He snapped, looking very ill tempered.
"Don't you yell at me Gawain, you are the one making enough noise in here to wake the dead, and where are your pants?" I said still laughing at the sight of him.
"I spilled a glass of ale on my pants, I can't find a clean pair." He said shortly.
"So you are looking under the bed for clean pants?" I asked with a smile.
"I am not looking for pants Taryn. I am looking for my lucky dagger. You can either help me look or get out of my room." He said.
"I am not going anywhere, until you tell me what I have done to make you so angry?" I said planting my fists firmly on my hips.
He stood up to face me, his tunic falling just below his hips, his legs remained bare, but he had on his boots. Before I could concentrate on a more serious topic, we needed to do something about his attire.
"Why do you have your boots still on?" I said looking him up and down.
"My feet were cold." He replied seriously, which caused me to burst into another peal of laughter, he just stood there frowning.
I scanned the room quickly, and noticed something lying under and overturned chair. I walked over and saw a pair of Gawain's pants. I grabbed them, and threw them at him.
"Put these on." I commanded. He was happy to comply, he sat on the bed to remove his boots, I walked over and joined him.
"Gawain why are you angry with me?" I asked again.
He stood up to pull his pants into place, then sat back down next to me. "I am tired of you playing games with me." He said shortly.
"I have never played games with you Gawain, I don't know what you are talking about." I said trying desperately to keep my tone under control.
"Let me refresh your memory. Oh Gawain, I care so much about you, but the next day it is Oh Phillip I love you so much. In case you are not aware, that is playing games." He said.
"Gawain, Phillip is my friend, I love him as my friend that is all." I said trying to convince him.
"I know what I saw. Now you know why I am angry, you can leave." He stood up and began to walk toward the door.
I was angry now. He was calling me a liar. I was a lot of things, but liar was not one of them. I followed him to the door, and when he turned to face me, I let my frustrations out into one hard blow, right across his cheek.
He was surprised, no maybe shocked was the word. "Maybe you should open your eyes a little more Gawain." I shouted. "Who am I with right now, who am I almost always with. You!" I screeched. "If I wanted Phillip, don't you think I would be with him, instead of arguing with your ill tempered self! Maybe it is you who doesn't want to be with me. You are the one who spends nights with two women at a time. I guess I am not exciting enough for you!" With that I could bare no more. So much for keeping my cool. I turned and fled the room, not waiting for a response.
I slammed the door to my room, hard enough to make the furniture rattle. "How could one man be so pig headed, stubborn, stupid, insensitive, hateful. Ugggh!" I ranted loudly, not caring if the whole fort heard. By the loud knocking on my door, I took it to believe they had.
"What!" I yelled as I swung the door open.
"I believe you put on the angry act much better than I." Gawain said with a smirk.
"No Gawain, I haven't started throwing things yet, but if you would like to come in, I would love to have a target." I said trying to restrain myself from smacking him again.
"Taryn please calm down, I didn't mean to upset you so." He said reaching out to grab my hand, which I promptly jerked away.
"Well you did, I don't like being called a liar."
"I didn't call you a liar."
"When you refuse to believe what I tell you, you are calling me a liar. So do you think I am a liar Gawain?"
"No, I just think you aren't sure how you feel." He replied.
"Don't tell me I don't know what I feel. I have feelings, I know my feelings. Yes, Phillip is my good friend and I do love him, just as I love Lancelot, Bors, Galahad, and Dag. It is you Gawain, You." I pointed at his chest. "That I spend most of my time thinking about, and you who I imagine returning home with, and it is YOU who breaks my heart every time I see you with another woman." I stopped for a moment to regain my composure, but as the emotional outburst was through, the tears started to fall. "I don't think I sound like a woman unsure of her feelings." I finished much more quiet than before.
I stood there still, not moving, but I did not hold my head down in shame. I faced him, wanting, no demanding a response. He stood just as still looking at me. I am sure he was trying to process my out pouring of emotions. You would think he would be used to it by now. This was not the first time I had totally lost it on him.
He did not speak though, but he moved closer, until he was inches from me, but still he did not speak, he reached out, I did not draw back this time. He pulled me close, and held me. I knew I shouldn't let myself be comforted by him, at least not until he talked to me, but I did not care, it felt so good to be held. In his arms it felt as if no wrong, nor harm would ever come to me.
"I believe you." He said quietly against my hair.
I looked up, the tears still clouding my vision. "Gawain that is the smartest thing I have heard you say all night."
"I missed you little one, so much." He said pulling me closer to him again.
I pushed him back this time. "Wait just a minute Gawain. You may believe me, but I am still upset with you. You have treated me horribly for a month. You have made fun of me, flaunted other woman in front of me, and just been a pain to deal with. I think you have some explaining to do." I said regaining control of my emotions.
"Taryn you are right. I have been horrible to you. I will admit it, I was eaten up with jealousy thinking you wanted to be with Phillip. Will you forgive me?" He said sincerely.
"What about the other woman?"
"They were only to make you jealous, they helped me to my room that night, and then left."
"That is a lie Gawain. I saw one of them the next morning in your room. She answered your door." I said adamantly angry he would lie about it.
"You are right Taryn, but I was not in my room. Or did you storm away before you realized it? The girls accidentally took me to Galahad's room, and I was to drunk to go any farther. So he let me stay, and he took my room, he must have had visitors. You can ask him if you don't believe me."
I was surprised by what he had just said. I was just so sure that the women had been with him that night. He could be lying, but I didn't think he was, besides I wanted to believe him.
"I believe you. I know when you are lying." I said a small smile playing at the corners of my mouth.
"So you think you know me so well already?"
"Yes I do, sometimes I know what you are going to say, before you even say it." I said. He looked at me intently for a moment, no smile on his face.
"I love you Taryn, more than anything else on this earth, I love you." He pulled me to him again.
"Did you know I was going to say that?" He asked gently.
If I was surprised before, I was shocked now. I wanted to reconcile things with Gawain tonight, be friends again, but here he was confessing his love for me. I was about to respond, when a knock sounded on the door. "Taryn, its me, I need to talk to you." Tristan called with his impeccable timing. Gawain took a step back a disappointed look on his face, and motioned toward the door.
I nodded, and went to let my father in. "Come in." I said opening the door.
"We need to discuss our plans…" He stopped suddenly when he noticed Gawain. "I didn't know you had a visitor." He said looking none to friendly at his fellow knight.
"Relax Tristan, I was just leaving." Gawain said. "Taryn, goodnight." He nodded to me, and headed toward the door.
I looked to my father who I had grown to love dearly, and then to the man, I loved more than I could imagine. "Gawain wait." I called and ran to him, before he could leave the room. He stopped and turned toward me.
I would not let him leave without making sure he had no doubt of what my feelings were. I grabbed his hand when I reached him. "Gawain, I love you too."
He looked down at me, his eyes full of the same emotion I was feeling. He then looked over my shoulder toward my father. I am not sure what he was looking for, but I think he saw what he wanted. He grabbed me and pulled me to him in a crushing hug. His lips met mine, but only for a moment. "We will talk tomorrow." He said kissing my forehead. "Goodnight Tristan." He called to my father. "Goodnight Taryn." He said with one final kiss to the cheek. "Goodnight Gawain, sleep well."
I did not turn to face my father until the door had closed. Even then, I did not want to face him, but what could I do, stare at the wall all night.
"Tristan, I know you are probably disappointed in me." I said as I turned to face him. "I didn't mean for this to happen."
I looked up, and to my surprise, he was sitting in a chair calmly slicing pieces off of an apple.
"Taryn, you are free to love whoever you choose. Gawain will make a fine husband, if he can survive this mission and be one." He said bluntly.
"He will survive, we all will, and we will return home as planned." I replied firmly.
"You will not be allowed to join us on this mission."
"I will join you, I will travel with you, fight with you, and die with you if I have too. I will not wait for you all one more time, wondering if you lived or died. I will go Tristan." I said prepared to battle, for I would not yield on this one. I had to go, I am not sure why I felt so strongly about this, there was no changing my mind.
AN: Mush, mush, mush. Hope it wasn't to boring for you or predictable. Sorry it took so long to post. I have had a very rough week. Thanks for reading tell me what you think.
Quietrockchick: Thanks for the review, glad you like it.
KnighMaiden: I guess your review is more like a demand lol. I do my best to please my readers, so I will try not to let you down.
TrueLuvWaits: Thanks for reading!
Babaksmiles: Thanks, Sorry Phillip wasn't in this chapter more, just like he complicates Taryn's life, he complicates my writing sometimes, wasn't sure what to do with him this chapter. Taryn was a little rude to him.
Zelinia: Thanks for the compliments. Nope Phillip isn't dead!
Lancelottristanbaby: He's a man bitten by the green eyed monster.
Camreyn: Thanks for the review. It is harder writing having to make conversations go along with one's not written by me. I am glad you approve how I am writing Gawain, we don't get a huge insight into his character in the movie, just snippets here and their, so I try to keep him in what I think his character would do or say.
Irishfire: I erased an author's note which messed the chapters up, that is why you couldn't review. I am glad you thought the chapter went okay, I wasn't sure. Looking forward to more Stowaway!
EvenstarMor 2004: Hope it was straightened out soon enough for ya! Thanks for the review.
Marianna: I appreciated your comments thanks. So was the movie good, can't decide if I want to see it or not.
Brandy Lebeau: I always want to say Ladue, don't know why. Thanks for the review, hope you are working on your story, waiting for the next chapter!
Lucillaq: Yes I feel bad about poor Phillip, I considered getting him and Lena together, but don't think it would work. I have two endings one Tristan lives one he dies, not sure which I will use, I am afraid if I use the second many readers will hunt me down.
Blueskiesrusty: I agree, I think Gawain and Taryn have maybe had enough drama.
Elfvamp: I believe he is finally starting to see the light!
Tracy 137: I think this chapter fits your review perfectly.