Chapter Twenty Two: But What Is Truth?
Buffy quietly backed away from the basement door. She couldn't believe what she had just heard. Spike had told her about his human life and what he had told her was completely different than what she had just heard. She wasn't sure which story to believe or which Spike was the real one. Was he the vicious killer, terror of continents, killer of two slayers or was he the sensitive, beaten poet. Neither one seemed to make sense. Which was the Spike she knew?
"Buffy?" Giles asked, concerned. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Buffy said, wiping her eyes. "Really, it's nothing, just, you know, hormones."
"Are you sure?" Giles asked. He glanced towards the basement. "Did Spike do something?"
"No," Buffy said. "I'm um going to go upstairs. I'm really worn out from the wedding."
"Alright," Giles said.
Buffy hurried upstairs. There was only one person she could think of who could answer her questions. She sat down on her bed and, remembering how Anya had called Halfrek before, summoned her the same way.
Halfrek appeared in Buffy's bedroom, with an irritated expression on her face, "What do you want?" She asked.
"Answers," Buffy said. "I want to know exactly what happened between you and Spike."
"Why?" Halfrek asked.
"Because I just heard Spike telling Dawn his side of the story. Now I want to hear yours."
"Sure," Hallie said. "Why not? I have some free time." She sat down on Buffy's bed. "What do you want to know?"
"First of all, what were you to Spike?" Buffy asked.
"Jealous?" the demon asked.
"No," Buffy snapped. "But I don't want him getting into fights with vengeance demons and then getting drunk. Not with a baby and my little sister living in this house. So I want some answers now."
Hallie studied Buffy for a minute and then said, "You know, you and I have a lot in common. We were both the objects of William's obsessions and neither one of us wanted him. The difference is that he died the night I told him to stay away from me but you haven't been quite able to get him to leave you alone," She glanced at Buffy's stomach. "Obviously."
"So Spike was in love with you," Buffy said. "And you didn't want him?"
"He was a spineless poet who didn't have the gumption to stand up to his uncle, plus he had those rumors following him around."
"About Charlotte?" Buffy asked.
"Of course," Hallie said.
"Were they true?" Buffy asked. She had to know, both for Dawn's and the baby's sake. "And don't lie to me."
"I don't know," Halfrek admitted. "William's family and mine lived in different parts of England. I didn't meet William until we were both grown and out into society. I just heard the rumors, like everyone else in London but once I met William I didn't know what to think. He seemed so different than the monster he was made out to be."
"So you don't know whether or not he hurt Charlotte," Buffy said.
"No, I don't know. But I knew William's uncle and if I was going to pick one of them to hurt a little girl then I would have picked his uncle." She sighed, "You see I really only knew William by reputation. He moved in his own world, with his poetry. I sensed his infatuation but I tried to ignore it. Then he finally confirmed it one night and….. I guess you know the rest."
"That was the night he met Drusilla," Buffy said. "And William the Bloody became Spike."
"I didn't know about that until after I became a demon and even then I didn't know the vampire Spike and William were the same person. I, along with everyone else in London, just knew that William was found dead in his family's stable. There had been a string of murders in London, then so it was assumed that William had met up with them."
"It was Angel, Darla and Drusilla," Buffy said. "It had to have been them."
"Probably," Hallie agreed. She stood up, "I can't answer whether or not William harmed Charlotte. I can only tell you what I know."
"You've told me nothing," Buffy snapped. "Nothing that I don't already know."
"Sorry," Hallie said. "Now I really have to go." And before Buffy could react the demon had disappeared.
"Great," Buffy said. "Now what I am going to do?" She hadn't gotten any answers. She still didn't know who the real Spike was.
There was a knock at her door, "Come in," She called.
"How are you feeling?" Giles asked.
"Confused," Buffy said.
"About what?"
"About who Spike really is," Buffy explained. "I just had a visit from that vengeance demon he got into a fight with yesterday. I asked her if something I heard Spike tell Dawn was true and Halfrek doesn't know if it is or not"
"What did Spike tell Dawn?" Giles asked. Buffy told him the whole story, Giles listened in horror, cleaned his glasses and said, "What do you think? Do you think Spike's capable of what his uncle accused him of doing?"
"I don't know," Buffy said. "I know what Spike's done in the past but I can't imagine Spike doing something that horrible, at least when he was human."
"I'm not defending Spike," Giles said. "But why don't you look at his behavior now. Has he ever harmed Dawn or any other young girl that way?"
"He knows that I'd kill him before I'd let him touch Dawn," Buffy said.
Giles paused and then said, "You know Spike said the exact same thing last night. At the time I thought that it was just drunken ramblings but now I'm not so sure."
"What did he say?" Buffy asked.
"He said that he should have killed his uncle, rather than let him harm Charlotte. At one point he even thought that I was his uncle and was beating him."
"So you think that Spike was telling the truth," Buffy said.
"Actually I do," Giles said. "From my experience people tend to tell the truth when they're drunk and all the evidence tends to point towards Spike's innocence."
"So what now?" Buffy asked. "Know that Spike isn't and wasn't a child molester doesn't change anything now. He's still the same person he was before."
"But does knowing this change your opinion of him?" Giles asked.
Buffy didn't say anything and Giles, sensing that she wanted to be alone, left the room. Buffy stretched out on her bed, trying to make sense of all that she had learned. She knew that Spike had loved his brother and sister. That much had been obvious before and confirmed after overhearing his conversation with Dawn. And if she seriously thought about it she really didn't believe that Spike would have harmed his sister. One thing that had always been constant about Spike was his devotion to whoever had his heart at the time and during that time in Spike's life it had been Charlotte who had her brother's heart. But Spike wasn't the same person who had been beaten by his uncle and had adored his baby brother and sister. He was a vampire now, a chipped vampire but still a vampire. He had killed hundreds of people and if he had the chance he would kill again.
The door to her bedroom opened and Spike walked in. They looked at each other for a minute and then Buffy said quietly, "Who are you? Are you William the bloody awful poet who was abused by his uncle and watched helplessly while his sister was molested. Or are you Spike, killer of two slayers, terror of continents? Which one are you really?"
Buffy quietly backed away from the basement door. She couldn't believe what she had just heard. Spike had told her about his human life and what he had told her was completely different than what she had just heard. She wasn't sure which story to believe or which Spike was the real one. Was he the vicious killer, terror of continents, killer of two slayers or was he the sensitive, beaten poet. Neither one seemed to make sense. Which was the Spike she knew?
"Buffy?" Giles asked, concerned. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Buffy said, wiping her eyes. "Really, it's nothing, just, you know, hormones."
"Are you sure?" Giles asked. He glanced towards the basement. "Did Spike do something?"
"No," Buffy said. "I'm um going to go upstairs. I'm really worn out from the wedding."
"Alright," Giles said.
Buffy hurried upstairs. There was only one person she could think of who could answer her questions. She sat down on her bed and, remembering how Anya had called Halfrek before, summoned her the same way.
Halfrek appeared in Buffy's bedroom, with an irritated expression on her face, "What do you want?" She asked.
"Answers," Buffy said. "I want to know exactly what happened between you and Spike."
"Why?" Halfrek asked.
"Because I just heard Spike telling Dawn his side of the story. Now I want to hear yours."
"Sure," Hallie said. "Why not? I have some free time." She sat down on Buffy's bed. "What do you want to know?"
"First of all, what were you to Spike?" Buffy asked.
"Jealous?" the demon asked.
"No," Buffy snapped. "But I don't want him getting into fights with vengeance demons and then getting drunk. Not with a baby and my little sister living in this house. So I want some answers now."
Hallie studied Buffy for a minute and then said, "You know, you and I have a lot in common. We were both the objects of William's obsessions and neither one of us wanted him. The difference is that he died the night I told him to stay away from me but you haven't been quite able to get him to leave you alone," She glanced at Buffy's stomach. "Obviously."
"So Spike was in love with you," Buffy said. "And you didn't want him?"
"He was a spineless poet who didn't have the gumption to stand up to his uncle, plus he had those rumors following him around."
"About Charlotte?" Buffy asked.
"Of course," Hallie said.
"Were they true?" Buffy asked. She had to know, both for Dawn's and the baby's sake. "And don't lie to me."
"I don't know," Halfrek admitted. "William's family and mine lived in different parts of England. I didn't meet William until we were both grown and out into society. I just heard the rumors, like everyone else in London but once I met William I didn't know what to think. He seemed so different than the monster he was made out to be."
"So you don't know whether or not he hurt Charlotte," Buffy said.
"No, I don't know. But I knew William's uncle and if I was going to pick one of them to hurt a little girl then I would have picked his uncle." She sighed, "You see I really only knew William by reputation. He moved in his own world, with his poetry. I sensed his infatuation but I tried to ignore it. Then he finally confirmed it one night and….. I guess you know the rest."
"That was the night he met Drusilla," Buffy said. "And William the Bloody became Spike."
"I didn't know about that until after I became a demon and even then I didn't know the vampire Spike and William were the same person. I, along with everyone else in London, just knew that William was found dead in his family's stable. There had been a string of murders in London, then so it was assumed that William had met up with them."
"It was Angel, Darla and Drusilla," Buffy said. "It had to have been them."
"Probably," Hallie agreed. She stood up, "I can't answer whether or not William harmed Charlotte. I can only tell you what I know."
"You've told me nothing," Buffy snapped. "Nothing that I don't already know."
"Sorry," Hallie said. "Now I really have to go." And before Buffy could react the demon had disappeared.
"Great," Buffy said. "Now what I am going to do?" She hadn't gotten any answers. She still didn't know who the real Spike was.
There was a knock at her door, "Come in," She called.
"How are you feeling?" Giles asked.
"Confused," Buffy said.
"About what?"
"About who Spike really is," Buffy explained. "I just had a visit from that vengeance demon he got into a fight with yesterday. I asked her if something I heard Spike tell Dawn was true and Halfrek doesn't know if it is or not"
"What did Spike tell Dawn?" Giles asked. Buffy told him the whole story, Giles listened in horror, cleaned his glasses and said, "What do you think? Do you think Spike's capable of what his uncle accused him of doing?"
"I don't know," Buffy said. "I know what Spike's done in the past but I can't imagine Spike doing something that horrible, at least when he was human."
"I'm not defending Spike," Giles said. "But why don't you look at his behavior now. Has he ever harmed Dawn or any other young girl that way?"
"He knows that I'd kill him before I'd let him touch Dawn," Buffy said.
Giles paused and then said, "You know Spike said the exact same thing last night. At the time I thought that it was just drunken ramblings but now I'm not so sure."
"What did he say?" Buffy asked.
"He said that he should have killed his uncle, rather than let him harm Charlotte. At one point he even thought that I was his uncle and was beating him."
"So you think that Spike was telling the truth," Buffy said.
"Actually I do," Giles said. "From my experience people tend to tell the truth when they're drunk and all the evidence tends to point towards Spike's innocence."
"So what now?" Buffy asked. "Know that Spike isn't and wasn't a child molester doesn't change anything now. He's still the same person he was before."
"But does knowing this change your opinion of him?" Giles asked.
Buffy didn't say anything and Giles, sensing that she wanted to be alone, left the room. Buffy stretched out on her bed, trying to make sense of all that she had learned. She knew that Spike had loved his brother and sister. That much had been obvious before and confirmed after overhearing his conversation with Dawn. And if she seriously thought about it she really didn't believe that Spike would have harmed his sister. One thing that had always been constant about Spike was his devotion to whoever had his heart at the time and during that time in Spike's life it had been Charlotte who had her brother's heart. But Spike wasn't the same person who had been beaten by his uncle and had adored his baby brother and sister. He was a vampire now, a chipped vampire but still a vampire. He had killed hundreds of people and if he had the chance he would kill again.
The door to her bedroom opened and Spike walked in. They looked at each other for a minute and then Buffy said quietly, "Who are you? Are you William the bloody awful poet who was abused by his uncle and watched helplessly while his sister was molested. Or are you Spike, killer of two slayers, terror of continents? Which one are you really?"