Beware, beware! Evil Genius at work! Nancy (on the BotP list) made a comment that started me off with a little skit - what if Jason had failed with Plan A.
It's short - it's evil. It's the act of a Desperate Condor.
So – ignore the ending, and enjoy the alternate planning!
OOO
Jason, Plan A (trussing) having failed, deciding that lack of libido is the problem and coming up with (probably in conjunction with Tiny and Keyop) Plan B.
"Perhaps if we force feed them oysters and asparagus, with some more chocolate. And perhaps some mood lighting"
Result Condor is attacked by Eagle and Swan who are violently ill due to unfortunate combination of food and Jason's idea of "romantic mood lighting and atmosphere".
Plan C would involve Jason in full Condor mode, standing over them (Mark & Princess), gun drawn, shuriken ready, informing them that he was sick and tired of all this and if serious bonking like bunnies didn't start NOW he'd have to take drastic action.
Swan thinks this is a brilliant idea, Eagle is completely confused and takes out Condor, hoping that he can get his Second some sort of medical treatment for his strange fixation, shortly before being jumped himself by a frustrated Swan and Seeing The Light.
Serious Bonking Like Bunnies occurrs.
Condor, on regaining consciousness, thinks Plan C worked brilliantly, congratulates himself, and then retaliates against Eagle.
Cue Zark saying all is happy in the garden and fade to credits.