Above Ground - Draco

There fifth year went pretty well for them, almost as well as the second had. She knew they would never recover the innocent adoration their first year had held for each of them. She was happy again, though. She had learned to trust Draco again.

She never told her family, or anyone else, what had happened. She didn't see the need. They had gotten through it. She had forgiven him and they had found their way through. She was happy.

So when she went to surprise Draco at the office one evening with dinner because he had to work late and was told he had left early she was completely caught off balance. He had lied to her. He had told her he was working late and that he couldn't possibly be home before eleven. It was only eight. She was still standing there, staring dumbly at the receptionist, when Sarah exited the lift, leaving for the night.

When she saw the look on Ginny's face and the plate of food in her hands, she clenched her jaw. "Ginny?" She said quietly as she approached.

"Hm?" Ginny turned to face Sarah before fully coming out of the shock. "Do you know where he would go?"

Sarah shook her head sadly. "I really don't. I told him last time that I wouldn't do it again, I wouldn't keep my mouth shut. He took off at lunch, saying that he was going home early." There was nothing but regret and sympathy on her face. She was six years older than Ginny, but they had become good friends, especially over the last year. After she had apologized for not letting Ginny know about the time discrepensy in Draco's trips, they had started spending 'girl time' together and gotten to know each other pretty well.

Ginny nodded. "Sarah, would...would you mind helping me pack? I don't think I can get through it alone." The tears were already beginning to sting her eyes.

"Why don't we wait until we know..." Sarah tried to point out that nothing had been confirmed.

Ginny shook her head. "No. He never lies to me. He wouldn't lie to me for any other reason."

Sarah sighed and wrapped the younger girl in her arms. No, Draco never would lie for anything else. "Just wait one minute, I'll be right with you." She felt Ginny nod before she stepped into a nearby office.

She picked up the phone and called the hotel most well known for discretion. After a few strategically worded questions she discovered that he did indeed have a room there. She couldn't believe it. How could you be so stupid? A hotel? Just go to her place. And the lies? How easily were they found out! She opened a drawer in a nearby filing cabinet and pulled out a resignation form. Putting it in her bag, she returned to Ginny.

When Draco got home that evening he expected to find Ginny asleep in bed. When she wasn't there, he searched the entire flat for her. He ran a hand hastily through his hair when he couldn't find her. Turning to her dresser he pulled open the top drawer; it was empty. He pulled out the next drawer. It was empty too. He pulled the rest of the drawers out so fast most of them ended up on the floor. He raced to the closet and tore open the door, knowing it would be empty too. He threw his head back and roared before hitting his forehead against the wall and sinking to his knees.

He spent the night on the couch, unable to climb into the empty bed. He showered and went to work the next morning without a single concious thought. As soon as he apparated in Sarah thrust her resignation into his chest. When his hand automatically came up to hold the paper, she released it and returned to her office.

He sat behind his desk with a thud. He tried to read the reports sitting in front of him, but his eyes wouldn't focus. A few people came in and tried to talk to him, but he couldn't understand a word they said and he just stared at them stupidly.

She had left him. He deserved it. She was gone. She was better off without him. How could he have done this again? She was gone. His life had walked out on him. He had driven his spirit away from himself. He was alone. He had completely destroyed everything that meant anything to him.

He left work early and went to the nearest pub. He drank until they kicked him out. He had no idea how he had made it home when he woke up on his floor the next morning. He didn't make into work that day, or the next. People came looking for him after a week without word. He told them to run the company themselves and disapparated.

He spent two months drinking before deciding that it simply didn't work. He wandered aimlessly for a while after that, going wherever the wind took him. Somehow he ended up in New York. Riding in the subway the solitude weighed heavily on his shoulders. He was in a city of millions and not one of them knew his name. They all had their places to go and people to see, but he had nothing and no one. Being underground seemed appropriate to him somehow.

He happened to look up and see a couple clearly in love. She had forgiven him once. She would never forgive him again. How could he even ask?

It had been six months and he hadn't even looked at another woman. Somehow the divorce papers had found him when he couldn't even find himself and he had signed them. How could he refuse? Now he was free to look, free to roam, and he found it harder to believe than ever that he would even dream of anyone but her. There existed nowhere and never had a bigger fool than he, of that he was certain.

He had to find a way to prove himself, but how? She would never look at him again. He would find a way, somehow, even if it took the rest of his life. But he had no right to try. He didn't deserve her. He had no right to even attempt to win her back. He leaned the top of his head back against the wall of the train.

He would climb out of this hole. He would grow up, learn how to live a real life. Even if he only had his thoughts for company, he would live as he should have lived with her.