Chapter Three

It was the first snow of the season, the first real snow that blanketed everything in fluffy white that softened the world. The only reason Jean knew this was that Jubilee still had some in her hair as she led Bobby into the medbay. Bobby, however, seemed none too pleased by the forceful ministrations of his much younger companion. "It's not broken. I don't think this is really-"

"It's swelling and turning a lovely purple. It's broken." Jubes declared, pushing him unsympathetically towards an unoccupied bed. "If you weren't so busy trying to cream me with a snowball you would've seen the ice."

"Black ice. They call it black ice for a reason."

Jubes turned, scanning the room. "Hank said he was right behind us-" The young woman paused, eyeing Jean reclining on a neighboring bed. Jubes couldn't help it, her eyes flickered to the large steel cylinder that held Scott before returning her attention back on the telepath. "Hey, Jean. Didn't see you there."

They all see me as a widow, no longer as a wife. "Looks like you guys have been getting into trouble." Jean tilted her head back and kept the gauze firmly pressed to her nose even as the blood trickled down the back of her throat.

"You okay?" Bobby offered, easing carefully up onto the exam table, cradling his injured arm.

Jean nodded. "Just another nosebleed, nothing serious." She closed her eyes against the light in hopes it would encourage her head to stop pulsating. This is what happened when she spent too much time in Cerebro, exceeding the max hours allowed. But she had to start again; there was no other alternative. She was going to find that mutant, Sinister's little science project. There was nothing else left for her to do.

"Ah, right on time, Jean." Hank made no effort to hide his smug tone. "Can't say that I didn't apprise you of the risks. But I believe the Mr. Drake requires my attention as well, although I can't understand exactly how the Iceman slipped on-" He waited for a moment. "Ah yes. Ice."

"Salt in the wound, Beast. Can't tell you how much I appreciate it."

"Perhaps you should've salted the ice first?" Hank retorted.

Jean couldn't help but smile; poor Bobby wouldn't be hearing the end of this one for a while. Her mind was so numb that she didn't feel Logan enter the room.

"Jeannie."

"Don't start. I've heard it before and not just from you." She murmured under her breath, not wanting to let Jubes and Bobby in on the lecture. "I don't have a choice."

"Bullshit, Jean. It's been three months. It's high time that we take a realistic look at the future."

Her eyes flew open as she pushed herself up to a sitting position. "Only three months. Only! I can't believe you! You are the man who NEVER gives up, that there is always a solution for every problem."

"There is a solution, Jeannie." Logan left the unsaid hanging in the air between them, his dark eyes imploring her. "You are going to slowly kill yourself in Cerebro, searching the earth for the second time for a mutant that doesn't exist."

"I must've missed him the first time around." Jean said, pushing the gauze back to her nose as a fresh gush flowed. The room tilted slightly as her inner ear readjusted itself, causing her to sway where she sat.

Logan grabbed her shoulders to steady her as his anger boiled to the surface. "Goddamnit, this is what I'm talking about." Looking down and away, he shook his head slowly. "I'm just going to say it. I swore to myself that with Scott gone I would never leave your side. But I'll be damned if I'm going to stand by and watch you fry your brain to a crisp looking for a ghost."

Jean pushed his hands away, staring him down, but her anger couldn't hold her for long. "What am I supposed to do?" Her eyes burned with fresh tears and she made no effort to hide them. "Put yourself in my shoes and tell me when it's okay to let go. Because, I can't!"

"That's what I tell myself every day, Jeannie. No one doubts that you'd walk an ocean of broken glass to get to Scott." He cupped her face with one hand, wiping away the blood from her nose with the other. "But this ocean doesn't have an end, kid."

Jean let go of the breath that she'd been holding, freeing the sobs that were trapped behind it. It had been three very long months, twelve-hour shifts in Cerebro searching every continent, investigating every mutant she could find. None held the ability to manipulate biology. She hadn't taken a break, every day had been the same and the effects of her unending work were beginning to manifest physical symptoms that she could no longer ignore.

Logan had kept his distance for so long, eyeing her with silent smoldering stares that did nothing to dissuade her from her self imposed quest. And now, with him so close speaking to her with tenderness she seldom heard, it was disarming. She ached for Scott, was heart sick and alone in a world that had held them both. Yet, Logan offered solace that had been so long denied. She pushed his hand away gently, and held it in her own for a long moment before letting it fall to his side.

"Scott would not let you destroy yourself for his sake."

"Well, he doesn't get a say." Jean straightened her back and challenged Logan with her eyes.

He closed his eyes slowly, forcing back words he shouldn't say. "Then don't expect me to stay here to witness it."

Jean watched him leave the Medbay with Jubes right behind him. Apparently the argument hadn't been as quiet as she had intended.