Tidbits

Ginny/Harry Humor

Disclaimer: Harry Potter equals not mine.

If u like any of my tidbits, tell me so I can make them from tidbits to fanfics.

I got too much sun I SWEAR

I'm sitting outside reading the MOST RIDICULUS thing in the world. Its called; 'The homemaker's guide to all things decoraive'. Yeah, as IF I'll be using that anytime soon. It just so happens Gred and Forge forgot it was my birthday, so they bought me the cheapest stuff I could see. Gred got me the book, Forge got me this big spotted night-dress. I'm not to impressed, but what else is there to do around here when it's baking hot? You know what the worst part is? (Other than the book, and the dress) The fact that I'm a red-head. Okay, before you go all nutso saying that was random and this story SUCKS you should know I meant that because red-heads have fair skin. That's right I AM BURNING! And I'm not going to do anything about it because im mad. Oh yeah, and the freckles growing in patches all over my arms kinda sucks, too.

Alright, where were we… Right, 'The homemaker's guide to all things decorative'.

Before I begin I would like to state that I will NEVER be a homemaker or have kids because mom has described childbirth very… um… descriptively, and it apparently it HURTS LIKE HELL. So now that you know that, I'm going to show you a bit of this wonderful book I got from dear old Gred. (I'm using the dress from Forge as a welcome mat into my room.)

Okay… right, the book.

Oh wait, crap, mom saw the 'welcome matt'.
"I"LL CLEAN IT LATER, MIM!" Oh wait- fck, did I just call her Mim? Oh, what I wonderful time for Harry Potter to arrive on our doorstep! Oh wait- Harry Potter just arrived on our doorstep? Wholly shit- HARRY POTTER JUST ARRIVED ON MY DOORSTEP! YEAH, DOORSTEP! I want that doorstep! I'll sleep with it under my pillow! No, its bigger that my pillow, I'll sleep with it on me. Just realized how dirty that sounds.

I need to do something about the doorstep! Its too wholly to have people step on it! Harry Potter stepped on it!

Harry Potter with his dreamy eyes, and his smooth silky hair, and his toned muscles…

No, Ginny, bad Ginny! Don't make me get the electric collar!

Harry in an electric collar! Yummers

Ginny, bad girl! We already went through this. We cant like Harry?

Yum yum yum, I wonder if he can stay in my room.

Don't think like that, Ginny, your being a bad girl!

He can have my bed, I will have the floor!

Okay, Harry's staring at you. Don't think about him. Concentrate… thing about… Dead Puppies! Dead Puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies…

"Um- Ginny, are you alright?" He asked, seeing my screwed up face. Crap, I must look constipated.

Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies…

"Ginny- um… hello!"

Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies… I began to mumble it under my breath.

"Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies…"

Of course, to him it sounds like 'Deh puh-lease, deh pu-lease…' So he looks at me funny, and leaved to go find Hermione. I watch him go. Wow, nice ass… I wonder if-

No, Ginny! Bad girl!
Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies! Dead puppies! "DEAD PUPPIES!" Okay, not smooth. Lucky thing Harry was upstairs, and everyone else was who knows where. So I go back outside and pick up my book again. I'm on page 3.

Is your house looking boring, but you need it to look great for your guest? Heres a couple of ways to make it look grrreat!

Page 4…. Razzle Dazzle Curtains

Page 5…. Toperee Touchup

Page 6…. Kitchen Coloring

Page 7…. The amazing shining deco. Dummy

Bored as hell, I turn to page 7. In big glossy lettering it reads;

The Amazing Shining Deco Dummy!

A great piece of art for you to show off that only takes 13 steps!

Well this I have to see. Note the sarcasm in my voice.

Thing's you'll need

A wilderness rabbit

Two flowers

A couple of wild berries

Nails and a screw driver

Paint

A wand

And a good sense of fun!

My mind drifts to a certain raven-haired boy. He's too hot for words. Too hot for FREAKIN WORDS! HOT, HOT, HOOOT!

"HOT!" I screamed, jumping up from my seat. Metal plus Sun equals Ginny's burnt butt. I go upstairs slowly, clutching my arse, and open my bedroom door. I scream, seeing this little thing fluttering around my room. The door across from mine opens, and Harry and Ron peer out.

"Err- Ginny?" Ron asks, and I snap my head in his direction. "Is there any particular reason you're clenching your arse?" I realized one hand was still on my butt, and pulled it away instantly.

"It was- metal…" I mumbled, and Harry's eyebrows shot towards the heavens. I blushed, trying to explain. I wasn't really listening to my explanation, really, because my head was screaming. There was three of me! Well, three voices anyways.

So hot. He's sooo hot. Look at his dreamy eyes. Look at his shirt! You can see his abs!

Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies… dead… puppies…

"I was outside reading the dress Gredge gave me… I mean… well… and my butt was… there was metal… the sun… err…

I'm going to swoon! Imagine what his lips feel like! I bet he smells really good…

Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies, dead…

"My metal butt… smells good… it feels like lips… Swooning… Dead… puppies…" Ron and Harry looked kind of puzzled. Well actually, Harry was just looking hot, with this really sexy expression on his face, and Ron looked at me like I was insane.

Oh, Harry!

Dead Puppies!
Harry!

Puppies!
Swoon!
Dead Puppies!
Harry!

Harry!
Harry!

"HARRY!" I screamed, confused. Oh what the hell- Had I just screamed his name! Shit… shit… shit… shit… shit… I began to bang my head against the wall repeatedly, enjoying the pain. If was the only thing that made sense right now. My dear old brother grabbed me by my shirt and directed my down stairs while I mumbled 'shit' under my breath.

"Mom," Ron said, "I think Ginny has sunstroke." I looked around in a daze. How had I gotten down here? Did the dead puppies bring me here?
"Shit." I said suddenly, and everything began to fade. The last thing I remember was everything getting louder, like my ears were sensitive- And mom screaming in fright.